Thursday, October 15, 2009

I See London, I See France

I See London I See France

previous post: Star Dorks

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197 Comments

  1. I put the Eiffel tower in my ass once…

  2. …better that than Big Ben.

  3. “I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so, because some people out there in our nation don`t have that, and. I believe that our education, such as south Africa… and eh… the Iraq… everywhere like such as… and I believe that they should our education over here in the U.S.should help the U.S uh, eh, should help South Africa, and should help the other Asian countries countries, so we would be able to build our future.“

  4. don’t have maps*

  5. I’m English, but spend a lot of time in the U.S.A. I can’t count the amount of times I have been chatting up a girl when they’ve asked; ‘Ya’ll from france?’

    No bitch! If I was, I wouldn’t be speaking English in this English accent of mine would I!?

  6. @ Lucy

    What on earth are you talking about?

  7. I find this really hard to believe. No-one can possibly think that London is in France. If this is real, my faith in humanity has been well and truly shaken.

    And Goldenfry, it’s a reference to that Miss Teen South Carolina video, when she was asked about why so many students couldn’t find the U.S. on a map.

  8. I get the impression that Alex is not as dumb as this status update would suggest.

    I’m thinking that maybe Alex is looking for attention, and will even make herself (himself? Goddamn gender ambiguous names!) look like a retard to do so.

    I might be wrong, though.

  9. Thanks, Ben.

    I haven’t seen the vid. (Obviously).

  10. How long have I slept? When did “Idiocracy” turn from prophecy to reality? What’s the date? What planet am I on? Is this all Mel’s fault?

  11. I’ve just realised. This must be fake.

    There’s no way Alex would ever go to a library.

  12. i want to FIGHT that dumbfuck

  13. @Ben #7: London WAS once in France. Right after the Norman Conquest, in fact. Maybe Alex got stuck in a time warp and labors under the impression that it’s still the 1066 A.D.

  14. Ben – never underestimate how stupid some students can actually be.

  15. @ no way – my American friends (I’m not talking about the U.S. as a whole, I’m referring to actual friends of mine hehe) ALWAYS mistake an English accent for a French one. I’ve never been able to figure that one out…??? O.O

    I so hope Alex & Mel are 12 or under. That wouldn’t excuse it, but it might make me despair a TINY bit less for humanity…

  16. Lemme get this straight:
    They are in a LIBRARY, but rely on a Facebook status update to find out whether or not English is spoken in London?
    Un. Fucking. Believable.

  17. sorry im gonna call fake on this one

  18. I really really want to know how old these people are.

    As for people mistaking English accents for French ones, that’s just really weird. Those are the 2 most recognizable accents in the world to me; that is, I can tell what country the person is from as opposed to just which region or continent.

  19. Given that I’ve had friends ask me if England is in or near London, I’m not actually surprised.

  20. I was once visiting an Arkansas high school (don’t ask). I wasn’t surprised at the number of kids who were unable to find my tiny country (Ireland) on a map. I was surprised, however, at the number of kids who couldn’t find Arkansas on a map.

    You should really be able to find where you live on a map by the time you’re 16.

  21. When I was in California I had this conversation with a shop assistant:

    “Where are you from, I love your accent!”
    “London, England”
    “Oh my God, do you speak European over there?”

  22. that library is doing wonders for him…

    but seriously. this is why people hate us americans. these vapid, moronic people who can’t even answer a question as simple as “where is london?” look at a fucking map, read a goddamn book. with all the resources available to us, its an embarrassment.

    idiots.

  23. I had a boss (!!!) once who told me about how she and her kids were talking one day and the subject of travel came up…she told her kids that she wasn’t totally sure what the capital of England was but she thought it might be France. She still wasn’t sure the following Monday at work so she asked me. Yeah, those kids are going to grow up to be geniuses. Imagine how proud I was to work for her.

    So yes, I believe that this status update could be real.

  24. Sometimes I’m embarased to be the same species as these people. If your in a library ussually ones first instinct should be to find the information in a book then reduce the risk of looking a complete wally. Of course with internet access as well when looking for information I can think of many sites I would look before asking the random masses on facebook.

  25. Typical Americans, ignorant and retarded.

  26. @ Stu: brace yourself.

  27. Proving the American stereotype – not fair, but there you have it.

    Please let them all stay away from Europe.

  28. Reminds me of the 21-year-old admin of mine that I used to bang regularly in my office. After she blew me one afternoon, I told her to book me a flight to London for a meeting. As she was wiping off her chin (no joke), she looked up at me and said “Can I book that directly thru England or do you have to stop in the UK first?”

  29. True story. I was in New York and got asked if I (an English person) came from Australia. I denied it stating i was from England. To which i was asked
    “Is that a bit like Australia then? You sound Australian, are you sure you’re not Australian?”
    Yes i am sure
    “Oh. So England. Is that near China?”

    WTF!!

  30. I was at a conference in St. Louis, and many people – all of them were over 18 – did not know where British Columbia was. Three different people asked me if I came all the way from England!

  31. It’s reasons like this that being an American can be embarrassing sometimes.

  32. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eo8GQvgPbwk

    some americans are idiots.

  33. @ 29. The mix up of Australian, New Zealand and British accents by Americans happens all the time. Whenever I heard an american try to do an aussie accent, it sounds british to me.

    never heard of mixing french and british though.

    and another video showing american’s intelligence:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q9GZuT3HN6Y

  34. @Kinga
    I’m pretty sure I can tell between British and Australian accents. I must admit that I doubt I could distinguish between New Zealand and Australian, though.

  35. @ Brandi Blasphemy!!

    You can always spot the kiwi because they say “bro”a lot. If you get them to say “six” and “chips” and it sounds like “sex n chops” that’s a kiwi bro.

  36. This post makes me so sad.. gosh. Reason education is important #985844.

  37. @ Brandi

    Just remember, in NZ a “beard” is where you sleep at night.

  38. for the rest of the americans.

    world war II started in 1939, BEFORE the americans got involved.

    australia is NOT in europe, that would austria. they speak ‘german’ there.

    world championships or ‘world’ series usually includes countries outside of america. why are nba (NATIONAL basketball association) teams that win the championship called ‘world’ champions?

    canada is to your north (up the page on the map)

  39. LOL OMG AMERICANS ARE SO IGNORANT LOL

    to the people who think Americans are sooo stupid for not being able to differentiate between British, Australian, and New Zealand accents (which, by the way, I can)

    when I was in England studying, multiple people thought I was Canadian. Multiple people thought I was Irish.

    There is ignorance and stupidity in every culture (and not being able to decipher accents does not an ignorant or stupid person make.)

  40. So many times ive mentioned im australian online and someone always says ‘eww, isnt that where josef fritzl is from?’

    No. Thats Austria. In Europe.

    AND on the note of accents, Americans get ours wrong. Alot. And it hurts my brain.

  41. London calling to
    the faraway towns, but not
    As far as England

    (With apologies to The Clash)

  42. I conversation I had in America

    American: Where are you from?
    Me: Oslo
    American: Were is that?
    Me: It’s in Norway
    American: Where is that?
    Me: It’s a scandanivian country.
    American: Oh cool! Where is that?
    Me: It’s in the north of Europe
    American: Oh, where is that?
    Me: It’s another continent, across the Atlantic
    American: Okay then, nice talking to you.

  43. Literally the DUMBEST thing I have ever seen in my life. Which school system let them down so badly?

  44. @ first two comments:
    You mean to say the Eiffel Tower and Big Ben aren’t the same thing? Man and I thought that Eiffel was just the French name for Big Ben…

  45. You know what’s genuinely frightening? This is the generation that will be wiping our arses in the old peoples’ home. If they can get off Space-Twitter on their Space-ipidditypods first, of course.

    My Lawn: get off it.

  46. Seriously???

    ehhh. I met an american last night. In australia. she asked if i was irish… WTF!

  47. ^ Why, are you Irish?

    We don’t know who you are, genius, therefore you could be Irish for all we know. This isn’t facebook, I can’t click your name and see your profile page.

  48. @all: I’m an Eastern Euro-born chick who grew up in California. True story: I was on a Delta flight to Budapest a few years back, and right before landing, the pilot piped up: “Welcome to Bucharest!” ..At which the whole plane BOOED him! No, Americans are NOT as stupid as we Euros sometimes think. #themoreyouknow

  49. Canuck. Had to be the smart one. How hard is it too assume i was Australian. Obviously i wouldnt of teased if i had actually of been Irish.

    Neck Up.

  50. sarcasticmeow

    If you’re on a plane flying to a city, I’m pretty sure you’re going to remember the name of the city. That hardly makes people Mensa material. And where was the moron Delta pilot from? I’m guessing America. Thanks for proving the “Yanks are ‘tards” point we were all trying to make.

    Incidentally, I preferred reading your comment up to the second colon and pretending that was the end. Somehow, that made for a less lame story than the stupid one you went on to tell.

    “@all: I’m an Eastern Euro-born chick who grew up in California. True story:” – Holy shit, for real?!?!

  51. canuck, not Canuck

    Yeh, because everyone in Australia is Australian, everyone who speaks English is Australian, and everyone on lamebook is Australian. (Although that last point almost seems true.)

    Plus you put your name as Patt, with Pat being a stereotypical Irish name. Way to go, genius.

  52. are you seriously arguing over lamebook??

    mmm.

    Actually Patrick is a welsh name.

    Paddy being the stereotypical irish name. Genius.

    As i stated. I would of hoped people had the power of assumption. Maybe i gave you too much credit.

    I feel like you must be the type of kid who gets teased by all the kids in th eplayground, so comes on the internet to make himself feel better.

    Get back under the covers and jerk of to your mums Womans Day magazines and leave everyone else alone.

  53. @bingo: What exactly are you hating on? Why bother engaging with me if all you have is a stock speech + a supply of anti-Americanism? Xenophobia doesn’t turn me on. If you’re trying to score a date with me, I’m respectfully declining. XOXO!

  54. sarcasticmeow. lolz.

  55. And St Patrick’s Day is…? Oh, Holy fuck, it’s the IRISH day where we all wear green and get drunk on Guinness, an Irish beer. Genius. And I do have the power of assumption, I assumed you were a little bit slow. Nothing has changed that yet.

    What’s womans day? Is that Australian porn?

  56. ST PATRICK WAS WELSH YOU FOOL!!! HE JUST CAME TO IRELAND!!!

    HE WAS AN IMMIGRANT!

    womans day….its some crappy lifestyle magazine.

  57. Sarcasticmeows

    I’m not hating, just ridiculing. You have to admit yours was a bad example. People really do tend to remember the name of the city they are flying to. And I don’t see how you can call my speech a “stock speech” when it was completely tailored to address yours. Yours seemed a little more “stock” to me.

    But seriously, are you free for dinner tomorrow night?

  58. Okay, let’s throw it open to others then. Do people associate the names Pat and Patrick with Ireland?

  59. oh of course they will.

    its why it call a stereotype!!!

    the point i was making… we where in Australia, she lived with an australian, worked in australia, yet still couldnt decipher my accent, even though she was surrounded by Australians.

    I can already tell your american…

    What a suprise.

  60. @bingo: Ah, OK. Let’s sort this out over schnitzel and Sekt. I live in Berlin, so meet me tomorrow at the Hotel Kempinski on Unter den Linden. Wear an American flag pin on your lapel so I can recognize you. This is me, btw: http://tinyurl.com/cqwx2s

    =)

  61. And I can tell you are from NSW. You have an inferiority complex because you are from a crap state, yet so close to Victoria, which is awesome.

  62. @ jelly: Uh, no, Big Ben and the Eiffel Tower are not the same thing. Big Ben was gifted to England by the French as a gesture of goodwill back in 1993, when London replaced Paris as the capital of France. Before that, this magnificent edifice stood on the Left Bank and was known as ‘Le Ben Grand’.

    This is really basic shit that you would know if you weren’t American.

  63. NSW does suck.

    Ill pay that.

  64. Spoder? wtf are you talking about?

    1993??

    please tell me your kidding.

  65. Hey Patt, remember how I was trying to make the point that you are not the sharpest tool in the shed? Well, thanks for your help.

  66. My cats breath smells like cat food

  67. My cat’s breath smells like cat food

  68. i.actually.love.this

    This does not surprise. Whenever I tell Americans I’m from Peru, the usual response tends to be something along the lines of:

    1. So, how’s living in the Mediterranean?
    2. Niiiice, teach me how to samba!
    3. Oh my Gosh. So, do you, like… ehmmm… get to see Machu Picchu every day?

    I have slightly more respect for the third variety of answers. It’s actually kind of cool to have people think you ride a llama to classes, so I let them have it their way.

    Although, on second thought, this does surprise me. It’s London for christ’s sake. They must have seen Austin Powers, no?

  69. Mediterranean? Haha, idiots. How can people not know that Peru is between China and Mongolia? I mean, it’s kinda hard to miss it on the map!

  70. Peru…that’s near you are gay, right?

  71. @Patt

    Patrick was Welsh, yes, but his name isn’t Welsh. It comes from a Latin word meaning “aristocrat”, from whence we get the English adjective “Patrician”. It’s not unusual for patron saints to come from somewhere else. The patron saint of England, for instance, St. George, lived and died in Lebanon.

  72. Thanks, Boz…that was actually interesting and informative. Kudos.

    Also, tits.

  73. Alex, do us a favour and punch yourself in the teeth.
    Thanks.

  74. I don’t appreciate others who can’t differentiate between australian and new zealand accents. And no, i can’t tell the difference between american and canadian accents because i just dont care enough….

  75. ^that comment was brought to you by New Zealand’s favourite snack, Slum Jums – the buscut wuth the thun fulm of munt fullung.

  76. But I though Patrick was a French name!

  77. LMAOJKLOLROTFL ;)

    when did we decide that Alex and Mel were Americans?

  78. To be fair, I’ve been to London, and finding someone who speaks English, rather than Russian or Polish, is actually pretty fucking difficult.

  79. I’m guessing they’re American. I’d love to know if he knows anything about the rest of England, or France for that matter. I doubt he even knows about his own country.

  80. @B
    - Genius
    @TIHII
    - Try getting out of Acton or SheBu. Consider it travelling.

  81. I stayed at the RAC on Pall Mall. I don’t think that’s near Acton or Shebu, but I could be wrong.

  82. here is the link to the vid that Lucy mentioned.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qQdhMSEqhfg
    watch it! its too funny!

    I am from South Africa, and on my travels I have heard some pretty retarded things! like, um ‘so you’re from South Africa, right? then why are you white?’ and ‘shame, where you you get your clothes’ and ‘its it safe to walk around there, with like the lions and stuff?’
    Seriously!! WTF! go play in traffic!

    rock on.

  83. I’m English and my own (Irish) uncle thought I had an Irish accent. There’s stupidity everywhere.

  84. and in breaking news about dumb americans…

    http://www.news.com.au/travel/story/0,28318,26217319-5014090,00.html

  85. There is stupidity everywhere.
    But, I think most English people would have some idea of where America was on a map, and its capital city.

    People like Alex (and his/her friend Mel, who I actually doubt exists) just help perpetuate the concept most Europeans have that America as a culture just has its head up its own arse.

  86. Wow! A whole lot of vitriol here overnight!

    Only got time to deal with:
    Sarcasticmeow @ #13… Girl! The Normans came from a part of what is now France but which was not in 1066 – France (as we now know it) was then a whole load of smaller independent kingdoms and principalities. Just had to put you right there – cannot bear the thought of any part of England being over-run by cheese-eating surrender-monkeys. Which, of course, the Normans were not ;-)

  87. Geography’s not my best subject, but wow…

    See, I have this idea. In America, instead of our tax dollars going to Alex and Mel’s inevitable welfare checks, why don’t we pay for them to have their reproductive organs removed? I wouldn’t mind shelling out money for that.

  88. ^ Suprise suprise, the person who said “must lamb chops be made out of lamb? Could they not be made out of sheep?” turns out to be American.

  89. #87/88 Hahaha, BURN!!!

  90. @88 Hmmm I guess you don’t understand why I asked the question. I was curious whether or not they must be made out of a young sheep, or if they could still be “lamb chops” when they were a year or so old.

  91. I think you should quit while you are miles behind.

  92. I went back and saw your reply, so I suppose you do understand why I asked.

    But you imply that that question makes me ignorant. I’m sorry(not really) that I’m not a farmer and know these things.

  93. It may shock you to learn that I’m not really a farmer either. Are farmers the only people in America who know that lamb is made from lamb?

    You are ignorant, but that’s okay, we are all ignorant about almost everything. Most of us just choose not to advetise quite so much.

  94. Well, that’s a rather ignorant question, isn’t it? I only made a reference to farmers because of your name(when did I imply that I thought you really were a farmer?) and went with that. Not only am I not a farmer, but I’m not a chef, nor am I a big meat eater, so I really don’t care much for petty little factoids about lamb and mutton. I only asked about lamb/sheep because I really didn’t think that people needed to compensate for something by acting like they were really fucking cool and/or superior for knowing such things. Of course, I should have known better..lamebook is full of people who like to tear others apart for even a slight typo.

  95. I also find it interesting that you calmly explained it on the other page with almost no insult, but now coming over here, it’s “LOLZHGW American!!@1!” Would you have just chose to not comment on it, or would you have said, “Oh my God! I can’t believe someone from ______ didn’t know that! What an idiot!” I highly doubt it.

    In any case, it’s almost 4:30 am where I reside so I’m going to sleep

  96. If I was from another country would you have just chosen to not comment on it*

  97. @ LUCY – ARE YOU FUCKING RETARDED? Seriously….God only knows where the hell you are from – my guess is U.S.A – Only that can explain your attemp at a comment. Please DO NOT try to compare the education system in South Africa to the education system in the United States… I am from South Africa and I am clearly more literate than you could ever hope to be.

  98. @ Seriously?!?!

    Excuse me for not understanding your sarcasm. But are you retarded?
    Check Timmy’s comment in regards to Lucy’s comment.
    Goodness, I’m the last person to get on my high horse about the sweet-land-o-liberty. But really, good sir.

  99. You would have thought the quotation marks around the comment would have given it away, wouldn’t you? To a literate person, at least. :)

  100. You take yourselves a little too seriously. Stop arguing! Cheer up! PS Big Ben never stood any where its just a bell. a bell that resides in a large tower, the name of which I forget…

  101. I’m from Denmark ( in Europe, the World) and I just got back from NYC. A guy asked med where I’m from and when I said Denmark he said: “Oh, I just got back from Amsterdam. Beautiful country…” :-)

  102. … the tower of France? No England… ermmm, The Tower of London?

  103. actually, none of the above, just the Clock Tower…

  104. it’s called st Stephens Tower actually……

  105. I just assume all Americans are that stupid. Makes me a really patronising conversationalist when I’m in the States.

  106. That is just fucktarded.

  107. Most Europeans dont know anything about the US. They think people in Texas ride horses everywhere.

  108. European girls do the nastiest porn…for free.

  109. Generalized statements about the IQ of a country’s inhabitants are retarded…be they European, Canadian, Americans or whatever…. ignorance and unawareness of the world around us is not the monopoly of citizens of the USA…having been all over and seen some truly uninformed people everywhere…and their pervasive arrogance that they portray regardless of nationality….makes me laugh out loud……

    Only thing I will say about these folks is… stupid is as stupid does….

  110. That’s generally true, mind you I’m Irish and we really all are daft bastards.

  111. I don’t think Americans are stupid but most don’t care to know a lot about other countries. I’m not saying it’s good or right but when it comes to geography, they just don’t care.

  112. That’s a generalization too, but to some degree I think Americans get a hard time over this issue – but the US is a country the size of a continent, and I’d be hard pushed to put all the states in the right place on a map or name all their capitals without making any mistakes.

  113. Even if alot of us are dumb, our country is alot more important to the world than yours. and we could blow you up. america, fuck yeah

  114. Let me preface my question by saying that I do not have perfect grammar (my apologies) and have far from perfect spelling. I’m also prone to typos, so please forgive me in advance for any mistakes I will inevitably make below.

    To those from various countries: Are Americans the only people fascinated with the intentional misuse of punctuation and capitalization?

    I am a “Yank”, and my world travel experiences are limited to Canada and Mexico. So, I’m asking purely out of curiosity.

    Thanks!

  115. Alex and Mel are idiots in their own right.

    I get furious when citizens of other nations try to qualify the education of 300 million people because they are of one nationality. Americans get ragged on because they don’t know “enough” about other countries? Sorry most of us are too busy paying attention to the problems in our OWN country. The only reason other nations know “so much” (not true) about America is because we are a superpower and constantly monitored. I sincerely doubt most Europeans have any notion of what America is really like. Most tourists I have met here and abroad, when they hear “United States” say “OH New York City!” as if NYC is the only important thing to know about America. But hey, at least they know NYC is IN America.

  116. to Jon – america would never blow up England bail america out all the fucking time then they go and our soldiers in friendly fire. i dont actually have a problem with america – just with what you said :)

  117. *kill our

    sorry my keyboards a bit crap.. :/

  118. to mary – i agree with how ridiculous it is to stereotype 300 million Americans as stupid but the reason we know so much about America, is not because your a superpower and constantly monitored but simply because the English learn GEOGRAPHY at school, therefore we learn about the other countries and continents. Also you say “Sorry most of us are too busy paying attention to the problems in our OWN country.” Well, thats a poor excuse really cause every country has problems. England has its own problems but we still know about other countries as there are plenty worse of than America and England. You also say that most Europeans have any notion of what America is really like, well thats a bit of a generalisation of European people isnt it seeing as theres a lot of countries in Europe.. just saying.

  119. i weep for our future.

  120. Who cares about other countries, anyway? Geography is for losers.

  121. Wow. I really hope Mel and Alex are 4 years old and can magically type well… because that’s awfully sad…

  122. Lucy, the point of my stereotyping was to demonstrate how stupid it is to stereotype, that the door swings both ways. I won’t make excuses for our public school system, but I always feel the need to defend my country against gross generalizations. Americans are taught geography as well and because two idiots did not learn it, the rest of the nation is saddled with their ignorance. I wasn’t excusing anyone by saying we are focused on our own country, merely giving a reason for our indifference, not ignorance, toward the goings on in other countries.

  123. My friend’s ex-girlfriend, a 45 year old woman, thought that Italy was a city, and that it was the capital of France.

  124. Mary, ok then thats fair enough, i just wanted to say what i said, but i don’t disagree with you. We both know stereotyping the whole of America or England for that matter ridiculous. I wasn’t saying that all Americans do not know geography i was just explaining thats why the English know alot about America. It’s fair enough you want to defend your country cause i am doing that too, but i’m not attacking America, in fact i wish all countries would get along and understand eachother, but i suppose thats not realistic.

  125. @Spoder
    Do you understand that which we know as sarcasm? Read the geographical ineptness in the post we are all commenting on, then perhaps you will understand the reasoning behind my comment.

    P.S, I am neither American, not live in the USA, but I’m pretty sure if I did neither my intelligence nor sense of humour would be altered.

  126. @jelly: Oh christ, I knew I should have just replied to Patt and knocked this on the head, but I couldn’t be bothered.

    Yes, I understood the original post, your comment, and all subsequent comments. Yes, I understand sarcasm – that’s why my post was dripping with it (although clearly not dripping enough – next time, I’ll be sure to put the winky face at the end).

    The sarcastic nature of my post extended to my comment re: Americans. I am Australian, and live in Australia, but I think American-bashing sucks. Chill – I’m agreeing with you!

  127. Ah, the great philosophic minds of our country’s youth, philosophizing in the great learning hall… oh what will be the fruit of these seeds of brilliance?

    Yeah, we’re fucked.

  128. Hahaha Mea you made me laugh out loud.

    This chick is just pathetically craving attention. Dang 1990-something generation (you peepz born after 1990!!). Stop idolizing Miley Cyrus and pick up a book.

    Peace on Earth .

  129. trust me, the americans who aren’t this dumb are trying to get the hell out.

  130. Alex (not the tool OP though)

    OH MY GOD I think FML should forget about the blurring, Facebook is public anyway and these people should be named and shamed.

    Turn on their account to 1423543 messages in their inbox from us wankers telling them how stupid they are personally, I’d love it…

  131. Good idea. But you’re on lambook, not FML

  132. Good idea. But you’re on lamebook, not FML

  133. I despair, I really do. Just when I thought that people could not get dumber, this goes and proves me wrong. As an Englishman, I am gobsmacked. After all, the British did give most Americans a country, as well as a language, civilisation and the appropriate tools with which to gather resources. The least that kids like this could do in return is learn the name of our fucking Capital city.

  134. Yeh, you’d think the nation that goes around the world trying to impose democracy would have the decency to remember where they got it from.

  135. im not from texas

    in defense of america’s poor accent deciphering skills: america is a big place and there are a lot of people here. a lot of these other countries are either tiny geographically, or not incredibly populated. hence, the differences in accent between those places is not really all that huge, it’s just your ears are trained to pick up on them. for example, texas has more people than australia. and alabama has more people than new zealand. how many of you australians can tell the difference between a texas accent and an alabama accent?

    one time in italy, i met a drunk couple from sweden. they complained about how all the americans they met thought the lived in ice hotels and had pet reindeer. they said, no we live in a city, just like everybody else. the swedes found out one person was in our group was from texas and they asked “oh do you ride a horse to school and live on a ranch?” no, my friend said. i live in a city and drive a car, like everyone else.

    my point is, ignorance is everywhere but that doesnt mean everyone’s an idiot. there really are a lot of reindeer in sweden and a lot of ranches in texas. people get offended by dumb foreigners being ignorant and then do the same exact thing. there are a lot of smart people and a lot of dumb people in america, and england, ireland, australia, hungary whatever. (pretty much only idiots in new zealand though…jkjkjk)

  136. im not from texas

    also, @nick2 if you mean england, i’m pretty sure america didnt like england’s particular brand of democracy and, you know, started their own. so much so there was a pesky little war about it. in my opinion, as stupid as we americans seem to be, one of the greatest achievements in the history of mankind is our constitution — which pointed out england’s mistakes (at the time) and shows how to avoid them.

  137. Oh ‘im not from texas’, you were doing so well until you decided to throw in the comment on the war of independance/constitution. All of your previous points were very well said, commendalbe and thought out, then you ruined it with a sarcastic jibe.

    Do not give the ignorant fuel for their silly little fires.

  138. I have just realised that I cannot spell ‘commendable’

    Bollocks.

  139. Yes, “i’m not from texas”, you took something great and built upon it. Good work with that, but you should acknowledge the centuries of blood and sacrifice that it took to develop it in the first place. You know that pesky little thing called the Magna Carta and so on.

  140. This is so gay

  141. WHAT in fucks name….???

  142. To be fair, I’m not convinced those southerners do actually speak English…

  143. im not from texas- you are greatly mistaken, england is tiny, but I cannot understand a word of what someone with a strong liverpudlian accent is saying. there is a great breadth of regional accents in Britain, some of them more recognisable than others,

    that said, when I was in Nepal I stayed in the house for about a month- went to a tiny shop across the road every day and on the final day was speaking to the vendor…

    ‘so where are you from?’

    me- ‘england, london to be precise’

    vendor- ‘really! but your english is so good, I thought you must be american’…

    oh dear.

    still, never mind.

  144. Americans….sometimes I feel sorry for them…

  145. I had an American girl once ask me if I was from Paris, London, she then said, “My husband’s fighting in Iran”, I said “Iraq”? “Yeah somewhere in Asia”….
    I also had an American guy say to me,(in English), “I wish I could speak English”.
    These people are real and out there, scary.
    I’m not a Geography professor but then again I would be able to find my own arse if it was on fire, unlike some of these people I suspect probably would die a painful fiery death.

  146. Well, technically Iraq is in Asia so she’s 1 for 3.

  147. horrified american

    ok first of all i just want to say whoever alex and mel are, they are dumb shits. i’m absolutely horrified to say that we live in the same country. even if this was set up to get her attention, it is almost worse because no one in their right mind should want to depict themselves in such a negative light to get this sort of attention. but i also want to say that this is not TYPICAL American behavior… yes, we do have a lot of shit for brains citizens living here but their lack of intellect shouldn’t reflect on our country as a whole.

  148. “you’re in a FUCKIN library” lol

  149. dude,

  150. @Lucy post #3… isnt that from that beauty pageant winner lol? that was funny

  151. This could well be real, and silly people don’t only exist in the USA. In my first year of Uni one girl at my hostel seriously said this: “So, did the Nazis win? I never really looked it up.”
    Faith in mankind: forever shaken! :P

  152. did they really at library?
    i mean, Alex really a student?

  153. @Sarah

    I was born in the early 90s and can honestly say that I don’t know a single person that idolizes Miley Cyrus. I’m pretty sure it’s more of the “peepz” that are born in the 2000s.

  154. @ i’m not from texas

    I totally get what you’re saying but I am and Aussie and while we might not have as many people living here as in the US, our country is about the same size. I might not be able to tell the diff between Texas and Alabama accents but I can tell when someone has an American accent (and I doubt you could tell the difference between a northern and southern aussie accent).

    But seriously English and French accents are totally different, it’s not about how small a country is its about how stupid people are and how ignorant they are of the rest of the world (that may sound a little harsh but I’m only referring to the Alex-Mel minorities of the world)

  155. French people do not speak english with their accent. they speak french. so when they learn english as a second language it has a french accent. :| i cant believe this is serious

  156. witness signature

    This entire dialogue belongs on “Lamest of Lamebook”. Seriously, people. Get a grip.

  157. typical american, too retarded to realise that he is actually speaking a foreign language. The English language, oddly enough, is fron England.

  158. @basket: So I’m guessing it was the American people who decided to take “fron” and turn it into “from.”

    If you’re going to call a “typical American” retarded, remember to spell check your insults.

  159. lol, internet.

  160. Americans. Sigh.

  161. Ahhhh, the USA people…

  162. Not all americans are that stupid. That’s a shitty assumption to make. I’ve talked to people in Europe that didn’t know anything about where I live and I didn’t care.

    Some people just don’t care enough to learn these things, and that’s their fault. It doesn’t matter where they are from.

  163. This is sounding familiar… I’m English and always wondered why the guy in the seven eleven in Vancouver used to talk to me in French, until one day he asked me where I was from. When I said England, he said “that’s near Paris, right?”. My response: “Well, I guess you could say that. England is fairly close to France.” was met with a confused look. Turns out he (and all of his friends) were convinced that England was a town in France. I’m not saying I know everything about everywhere… but really?

  164. After connecting to a flight in Minneapolis on her way to to Germany, my Grandmother sat beside someone that was from Duluth, Minnesota. The woman asked her where she was from, my Grandmother replied “Thunder Bay”. The woman asked where was that? My Grandmother replied “Ontario”. Still confused the woman asked her where that was. My Grandmother then replied. “Canada”. The woman still confused asked “where is that?”
    I believe the story.

  165. it’s funny how everyone assumes these people are americans.
    they could be from any country in the world which speaks english.

    considering the language of ENGlish originated from ENGland, shouldn’t they have realised? =]

  166. i always thought we english were quite aware of the world, but my gf proved me wrong the other day. i was telling her me and my mates were planning a trip to sweden for new years and she could bring her friends if she wanted to. she said ‘yeahh i love sweden!!’ followed by, ‘thats near france isn’t it?’
    i said ‘no, i think you’re thinking of switzerland..’. she said, oh ‘wheres that, is that the one near spain?’
    times like these it’s easier just to say yes.
    i wouldn’t mind if she was just dense but she has a BSc!

  167. I went to New York and some guy said to me “so where are you from?” and I said London. So he says to me “is that in Manchester?”

  168. um maybe they confuse french accents with british ones since they learn to speak in a british accent? But I still do not believe that. Some people pride themselves on being dumb though. I can’t believe how many posted here saying people have seriously confused the two…I feel like this is a big prank…all you people faked this post and then commented here trying to prove it’s true!

  169. no they must speak chinese

  170. Christ you Americans make me laugh.
    I really think after such abominations such as alooominum (Its Aluminium) and Doodie (Duty god damnit)that it should be the DUTY of every american to at least work out that english comes from England. We may be the UK to you but it kinda stands to reason to follow logic to find out what language a nation speaks. China – Chinese, France – French, Armenia – Armenian.
    ENGLAND – ENGLISH!

  171. @170 i’d be irritated by your comment but oddly enough i’m trapped in this idiot hell hole…it’s has it’s hilarious perks (just look at this website) but half the time it’s like you’re a lone survivor trapped amongst an idiot zombie horde…and if you get bitten, instead of dying, you contract crabs….or an insatiable appetite for bugles chips….help me…

  172. This is why the rest of the world hates you america

  173. Mike, America obviously doesn’t give a sh*t.

  174. further fuel to the “dim witted american” stereotype.. made by australians haha. must watch
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJ3RrqBqk14

  175. @rick
    just watched your video and there is no excuse for how stupid and ignorant most Americans are…

    To the ppl who posted this:
    You’re in a fucking library!!! find an atlas!!! but I know you would probably respond “Whats an atlas???” so I will just say in advance that there is no hope for your kind of ppl… London, France WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!! suppose you vacationed in Paris, UK or Athens, Italy … or fucking Berlin, Norway…

  176. Don’t judge all, or most, of Americans on these morons or stupid videos people put on the internet. Haven’t you noticed that dumb people from all nations have a tendency to use little discretion when displaying their idiocy?

  177. I want kill them. I wish I was there to make them feel really dumb.

  178. It would be worth the 15 year prison sentence to be there when they said this.

  179. A female contestant on American Idol a few years back said she wanted to go to London to see the Eiffel Tower *rolls eyes* Fucking retards.

  180. now you can start wondering why everyone hates americans…

  181. I met once a russian living in canada:

    she: where you from?
    I: Venezuela..
    She: It’s that middle east?
    I: no!, south america, bordering west with colombia, south with brazil
    She: oh…(she didn’t get it)

  182. Two things:

    One, I’d like to see a “pop survey” of rural English (e.g.). It’s not clear that the average American’s level of ignorance is exceptional. Standardized testing DOES show that we consistently underachieve, but it’s not clear that such test results are either accurate measures of occupancy-related intellectual aptitude or that they measure other important components of personality like work ethic or creativity. And for those who claim anecdotal evidence, keep in mind that you entered these situations expecting your stereotype to be confirmed.

    Two, Facebook is an American company. The internet is an American invention. Why hasn’t your country of origin–which is presumably less “ignorant”–developed superior alternatives?

    In sum: who doesn’t like to trash his boss? A soothing balm for an inferiority complex if ever there was one.

  183. To substantiate that last bit of psychology, here’s a typical anti-American rant:

    “Christ you Americans make me laugh.
    I really think after such abominations such as alooominum (Its Aluminium) and Doodie (Duty god damnit)that it should be the DUTY of every american to at least work out that english comes from England. We may be the UK to you but it kinda stands to reason to follow logic to find out what language a nation speaks. China – Chinese, France – French, Armenia – Armenian.
    ENGLAND – ENGLISH!”

    Yeah. Clearly our twelve year olds don’t give the UK enough respect. You guys are very important and everybody here respects you.

    By the way, the Chinese don’t speak “Chinese.” Do you mean Mandarin (putonghua)? Cantonese (guangdonghua)? Any of the other dozen-odd major dialects? I guess in this situation it may not “stand to reason to follow logic to find out what language a nation speaks” (prose as lush and evocative as it is lucid).

    A strange thing, how stupid people derive pleasure from calling other stupid people stupid.

  184. I worked with Americans and have been in America a few times and I am Australian. Heres some common comments, and I shit you not, they are not made up

    1. ‘ They speak English in Australia?’
    2. ‘You are Australian? But you’re not white!’
    3. ‘Which part of England are you from?’ I’m Australian ‘Isn’t that in England?’

  185. ^I’ve lived in America before, but come from Finland, and one of the best questions I was ever asked was if we have….. electricity in Finland. To which we answered yes, but whenever we want to use the computer for example, one person has to sit on a bike and pedal to generate the electricity while another person uses the computer, and then they switch. They BELIEVED us.

    But tbh, it’s not just Americans. I was talking to a British girl once, who was probably in her mid-20s, who asked what nationality I am. I said Finnish, to which she replied, “Oh cool, where do Finnish people come from?” Uh, Finland? “Sweet, so do you speak English in Finland? “Well we learn it, but we mainly speak Finnish.” “Cool, cool, where IS Finland?” “Next to Sweden.” “……….cool.”

  186. I still don’t believe he actually asked that question.
    Do they speak ENGLISH in ENGLAND

    I mean come on.
    wtf?
    WTF?

  187. @186: I still don’t believe you can’t read properly.
    When you read London it registers as England?

    I mean come on.
    wtf?
    WTF?

    *sigh*

  188. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA HOLY SHIT STUPIDSTUPID

  189. I live in Scotland and I’ve spoken to a lot of American people who say England when they mean the whole of the United Kingdom, including my American friend who lives here. I’ve also seen this on T.V. The United Kingdom is made up of FOUR countries…Scotland, England, Northern Ireland and Wales. It also includes lots of small islands. I wouldn’t say New York if I was talking about the whole of the United States of America.

  190. [...] After reading something online, i don't think Americans know where are a lot of places in UK Lamebook – Funny Facebook Statuses, Fails, LOLs and More – The Original I See London, I … Signatures are visible to registered members only. [...]

  191. 11 years living in Washington DC. If I had a dollar for every time someone asked me what language we speak in Australia…..

    I have been asked “where are you from?” replied Australia, then “Oh, wow you have learned English very well!” also, “What language y’all speak down there?”, also “It must be cool to be European!”

    Sorry Americans, but after 11 years I have now learned to just look at the people who ask me and I just shake my head and leave. There are no smart comebacks when faced with such stupidity.

  192. London is a small city in southern Indiana.

  193. My son asked me the other day why we speak English and not Australian, since we live in Australia and not England. He’s 6. I only hope these people are younger than that and are in possession of some amazing typing skills.

  194. @Ada

    You wouldn’t be a nerdfighter by any chance would you?

  195. ok i have a lot to say but i read a lot so i think i’m entitled to it.

    @173 i laughed so hard. i’m pretty sure that was the only funny post in this entire thread. the other nearly 200 just made me die a little inside….

    @183 fun fact: china is on their way to passing up america as the largest english speaking country in the world.

    @189 yeah except the entire UK fits inside of the state of oregon and the population of the UK is about the same as the population of texas and california put together. i’d say bad comparison.

    @everyone i’m an american that has met plenty of stupid people that live here and done the exact same thing that all of you have. it’s really not that hard. the difference between most americans and apparently most of you is that while we don’t know much about your countries at least we’re trying to be nice. every one of these stories is about a local trying to learn about where you are from. these ignoramuses are trying to expand their knowledge while you are just being smug and superior. just a thought guys, maybe we’d care more about you guys if you weren’t being douche bags.

    and i knew before this thread that london was part of england and not france.

    one last thing, i don’t get why guessing an accent incorrectly is such an offense. you sound like you’re from somewhere else. big deal. my brother had a speech impediment for years and everyone thought he was from somewhere else even though i spoke the exact same as the people asking the question. and we looked alike it wasn’t like he was a little african boy or something. as has been said before, stupidity abounds everywhere, it’s just advertised more in america.

  196. Some people should be sterilized.

  197. No, @hellababe, actually, they should be “sterilised,” haha. ;^)

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