Friday, November 20, 2009

Zing!

Zing1

Zing2

previous post: NSFW: We Couldn’t Believe it Either

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69 Comments

  1. I liked the Matrix reference more than the ‘zing.’

  2. First!!!!

  3. Amery made me spit water onto my laptop. HILARIOUS.

  4. What’s with the creepy comment about her bras being too big for her mother? Is John B. her dad? Wow Dad, thanks for the bras for Christmas. I especially enjoyed opening them in front of Uncle Kevin.

  5. hahaha, Zing!

  6. kate, you need to learn how to spell. it isnt opening, it is opining DUH!. get a clue alredy.

  7. Amery is so right fucking on.

  8. Stephan = gay

  9. flexo, you need to learn how to be amusing.

  10. I like turtles.

  11. yep Amery just summed it up right there. Stephan you are a pussy-bish.

  12. Is it sad that I am aroused by the simple fact that Julia’s bras are too big for her mother?

  13. and ms bitch, you need to learn to stop being an asshole and writing stupid asshole blogs.

    you are all assholes. fuck all of you.

    Julis needs to learn how to spell. it isnt hasten, it is hasting dunb ass’s

  14. Women sure can be shallow.

    But Stephan sure has a gaping vagina….on his chest.

  15. It seems that Stephan needs a little lesson in being a man.

  16. @Brahs

    hum… I’d say yes.

  17. BITCHES SUCK ON THIS DICK

    the rest is meaningless

  18. Amery’s post is true.. Sad., but true.. *hangs himself*

  19. Occasionally, I will let a guy suck it.

  20. “Is it sad that I am aroused by the simple fact that Julia’s bras are too big for her mother?” – Brahs

    yes.

  21. Girls are shallow, guys are shallow.

    It’s all evolution: girls want the most powerful, leader of tribe mentality

    guys want to populate the entire tribe.

  22. I like the nice guys – the “pussies” if you will.

  23. Do you know what Ed Gein said about women?

    “When I see a pretty girl walking down the street, I think two things. One part wants me to take her out, talk to her, be real nice and sweet and treat her right.” And what did the other part think?”What her head would look like on a stick… ”

    HAHAHAHA!

  24. How’s Cecilia?

  25. I like GOOD guys. “Nice Guys” are the ones who act like they’re your friend and then feel that you should reward them by putting out. Which I think is exactly what Stephan is doing.

    The other hilarious thing about Nice Guys is that they’re always whining about the object of their affections pursuing a guy who’s mean to them (“women love assholes, I should become an asshole so women like ME for a change, wah wah waaah”)–meanwhile, THEY THEMSELVES are pursuing someone who’s mean to them. I wonder if some poor girl is trying to get Stephan’s attention and he’s too obsessed with that other girl to notice?

  26. @Geonardo

    Great, Great point.

  27. “TRY AND GET A RESERVATION AT DORSIA NOW YOU FUCKING STUPID BASTARD!!!”

  28. Well said Geonardo – couldn’t have put it better myself…

  29. If you want to bang a girl, do not be her friend.

  30. I have all the characteristics of a human being: blood, flesh, skin, hair; but not a single, clear, identifiable emotion, except for greed and disgust. Something horrible is happening inside of me and I don’t know why. My nightly bloodlust has overflown into my days. I feel lethal, on the verge of frenzy. I think my mask of sanity is about to slip.

  31. @Paul: Cecilia? She’s marvelous. There’s nothing to say. Wait, am I being cross-examined?

  32. @Bateman: I’ve noticed you looking at me. Don’t be shy!!

  33. Lesbians do!

  34. @ Patrick

    What are you so fucking zany about?

  35. @ Patrick

    Would you like to hear today’s specials?

  36. @ David

    I’m just a happy camper! Rockin’ and a-rollin’!

    @ Waiter

    Not if you want to keep your spleen.

  37. Negative. Cancel that.

  38. Hey why are there copies of the style section all over the place? Do you have a dog? A little chow or something? haha

  39. I have to give props to you guys…….LOVE the American Psycho quotes. Gotta watch it now, maybe listen to some Phil Collins.

  40. Stephan: “girls don’t like me wahhhh wahhh”

    Ya….that’s gonna work.

  41. God Patrick, shut up

  42. patrick sounds like the biggest asshole here. he sounds like he is crazy to. you suck and are the biggest asshole.

  43. Deja Vu’s are usually a warning sign for epileptics that a seizure is about to occur.

    Julia probably should see a neurologist about Temporal Lobe Epilepsy. Her Deja Vus are probably Simple Partial Seizures.

  44. Alex my little brother has been suffering from Epilepsy for 14 years now and I never heard about that. I really can’t explain Déja Vu’s but I don’t think that’s accurate.

  45. calcium lime and rust CLR!!

    bahahaha @ 43

  46. Kiwi,

    There are many different types of epilepsy. Temporal Lobe Epilepsy usually starts with a light headed feeling which is usually described as a feeling of Deja Vu. This is called a Simple Partial Seizure. It can also be accompanied by lip-smacking and being unable to speak. This progression is called a complex partial seizure. If left untreated by meds these can than progress into Grand Mal seizures (actually seizing, losing consciousness etc). The Deja Vu feeling is usually a warning for those that have Grand Mals because it happens first.

    I have had Temporal Lobe epilepsy for 6 years.

  47. hey calcium, bhahaah yourselve you sheep asshole. baahaahahha. are you a sheep or what the hell. calcium isnt even a word, it is spelt calsium DUH.

  48. flexo I love you!

    don’t deny my man love! I am totally gay for you dude!!11!11!!

  49. shut up asshole. i think you are the biggest ashole, first i thought calsium was, but it is offocial, YOU ARE.

  50. Um, flexo, I don’t want to get in the middle of your argument(s) but…actually, it IS calcium. And if anyone here doesn’t know how to spell, it’s OBVIOUSLY you. Not only that, you’re not very creative with your insults. “Asshole” gets old pretty quickly. I sincerely believe that you need psychotherapy. Please get help for yourself and the safety of others. PS: you’re a douche nozzle

  51. queenforaday- Obviously you can’t pick up on the sarcasm. Ar-tard.

  52. hahahaa i think i want to have flexo’s children

  53. @queenforaday, flexo is clearly being an idiot for the lulz. Sad that you didnt pick up on that.

  54. I know exactly where Stephan is coming from.

  55. Ugh, Stephen sounds like he has a serious case of Nice Guy Syndrome. Here’s the definition from Urban Dictionary:

    “An annoying mental condition in which a heterosexual man concocts over simplified ideas why women aren’t flocking to him in droves. Typically this male will whine and complain about how women never want to date them because he is “too nice” or that he is average in appearance. He often targets a woman who is already in a relationship; misrepresenting his intentions of wanting to be her friend and having the expectation that he is owed more than friendship because he is such a good listener. He is prone to brooding over this and passive aggressive behavior.”

  56. Hahaha, Amery just made my day.

  57. Wow. I never thought I’d see myself on here.

    @Kate_Mcguire: Yeah, it’s her dad. It made the zing all that much better.

  58. @ Alex

    Do the girls like it when you go “downtown” and have a seizure there?

  59. I get the impression that Julia is a moody drama queen who has cried wolf one time too many.

  60. @orion70: I would actually vote her for being a MLIA regular.

    Usual status updates include things like: “suddenly doesn’t know what it feels like to be able to pass air through her nostrils. pretty sure someone sealed them off with cement.”, “Town House flipsides pretzel crackers may be the most delicious hybrid snacks ever.” and “Nothing like a Sunday afternoon Red Bull.. figured out my next tattoo today :D ”.

  61. AYO! but kiiiinda sad.

  62. Amery ftw

  63. The comment below this one made me laugh harder than the post I quote “Amerty FTW”

  64. That thing about deja vu and epilepsy scares me! Now I really don’t want to get deja vu anymore, and I used to really like when it happened.
    Also, I agree with #25 and #56s urban dictionary quote is spot on! I fucking HATE guys like that. I really fucking do.

  65. These American Psycho comments are fucking on fire guys!

  66. @Brahs

    you are not sad cuz i’m a girl and that was totally arousing… until i realized it was her dad typing, then it was creepy lol

  67. Whats a camel toe

    Lmao @ Amery. Classic!

  68. @Eastwood

    Julz TOTALLY seems like she always wants attention.

    PS. first tims i’ve seen one of my friends on a site like this.

  69. Okay, first off.. American Psycho quotes = win.

    The “maybe I’ll kill myself” crap was a joke since my dad said to “restart the cycle.” Sarcasm is lost through the internet, apparently. I’m not positive, but I’m pretty sure no one has ever seriously killed themselves because of something their dad jokingly said on Facebook. If they have, good riddance. Darwin.

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