Tuesday, March 1, 2011

What Winners Look Like

previous post: Matthew Needs a Stiff Drink

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42 Comments

  1. Can someone translate 1 and 2? Here is what I got:
    1: take me home I want to rice it
    2: fuck off or fuck off

    Neither of those make a ton of sense but at least 1 is in sharpie seemingly.

  2. 1)take me home, I want to ride it
    2) suck off or fuck off
    either way I kinda puked a little in my mouth.

  3. doctorchalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

    No, I think you’re pretty much on the money Blah.

  4. Yeah Blah, it’s;
    take me home I wanna ride it.(with the most disturbing shit face ever seen)

    And durt bag #2 thinks he’s some witty bad ass tough guy

  5. I’m thinking..
    1. Take me home, I wanna ride it.
    2. Suck off or fuck off.

  6. 1. Take me home I want to ride it
    2. Suck off or fuck off

    Classy people are classy

  7. 1. Pass the rifle, I want to shoot it.

  8. 1: Take me home, I want to ride it.

    2: fuck off or fuck all?

    3: 2 teabags and a old shirt.

    4: See 1.

  9. What’s going on around her eyes?
    I think the second one is just “fuck off or fuck off” like just fuck off, that’s your only option.

  10. Oh Imamofo, I would love to make a joke about fisting babies. Unfortunately it is not fisting. The guy is doing the prep for a later fisting session. This child is being prepared for full insertion, it is receiving 3 finger anal salute. Which is the follow up of the 2 finger salute, that will remove any stool not yet excreted.

    If these simple rules are followed, there is hardly any risk to the fister or fistee. Bleeding is a common complication but won’t stain the fist.

  11. Last word of warning. However tempting it may seem, don’t ever do a Jeff Dunham impression whilst fisting a baby.

  12. Psssst Poobag mention the Silent Duck Technique.

  13. You must be kidding, I would recommend to start with a firm Side Prayer or the more traditional Hammer head.

  14. if you can read German I can recommend “Ein Fistlein fur Kinder” by Joseph Aloisius Ratzinger. Has easy to follow steps and the illustrations are awesome.

  15. what’s the big deal about the last one? It’s a dad with his kid right? the fingering thing is not THAT funny in my opinion. am I missing something or does this post just suck?

  16. #16 Fisting babies is not a big deal…? Do you have any idea how many babies end up in hospital every year because of this kind of attitude? It is no big deal? Let me tell you, it only takes a wrongly performed double pinker in the stinker, to cause permanent and irreversible damage.

    I hope this helps.

  17. stomabeutel, I love you. Whats up with the first one’s eyes?

  18. Why do think I have this nick? 3 words my friend, only 3 words “Fisting Gone Wrong”. My sister Ethelinda was less fortunately, that’s why we tell our kids from a very early age that there are 2 things you should never do whilst running.

  19. #18 Oh that is easy, she must be Japanese.

  20. The red spotting occurs after the traditional Wasabi enema and is seen as a sign of beauty and endurance.

  21. #3 appears to be at a Mardi Gras parade

  22. 1. Oh my sweet baby Jesus. WHAT HAS BEEN SEEN CANNOT BE UNSEEN.
    2 and 3. Eh.
    4. Not that creepy. o.O

  23. if this is what winners look like, i wanna be a loser

  24. 1 disgusting 2 silly white boy 3 grandma from random trailer park …might look like mardi gras But I’m betting my guess is better and they are on their way through the “park” and 4 bad advertising decision just not sure why no one found it creepy b4 it went on the van LMAO

  25. #2 Is definitely “Suck off or fuck off”

  26. Dear God, I hope that #1 is one of those cases where some dumb shit passed out and got sharpie’d (sincerely hoping that the “fuck me face” is simply the result of gas or nausea and just a coincidence). The thought of her on the prowl is enough to keep my ass in the house for the next century or so. I’m female, but no way do I wanna chance it! o_O

    Are those zits? Piercing scabs? Or red sharpie? Can anyone tell?!

  27. #4 is really creepy, I agree. But then, zombie cannibal babies usually are.

  28. Yeah, as if that hideous sow would actually be able to ride anything. I bet she’s not moved from that couch in 5 years. She’d kill anything she got on top of (one way or another), anyway.

  29. Don’t see what’s lame about #3. Apparently you people have never been to Mardi Gras. The crazier you dress, the better.

  30. I can just hear the thoughts running through #3′s head; “Please, please let people think that this is actually what my body looks like under here.”

    I’m really hoping that #2 has face painted dots around her face… as opposed to some truly appalling acne. In addition to that…..
    Come hither face: You’re doing it wrong.

  31. #1 has to put herself out there guys, don’t be harsh. Who knows when a guy will see that and take her up on the offer, rather than cut his penis off.

    #2 Surest way of annoucing that you’re not getting any, but pretendingyou are.

    #3 I’d rather look at her top than what’s underneath it.

    #4 I don’t remember what it is and I don’t feel like scrolling back up

  32. #1 that chick freaks me out. it looks like she wants to lick me.

    But I don’t see the humour in joking about fisting babies, or sticking fingers in their butts. Maybe I misread it all somehow, But I don’t get what’s so funny about it all?

  33. thisisnotanexit

    I would like to set up the idiot from pic 1 with the douche from pic 2

  34. sobunk, it’s not funny in the slightest.

  35. I agree sobunk and word. It did go way too far there.

    That doll in the first one scares the crap out of me.

  36. My fault there I’m afraid guys, I incited poobag to make those jokes, but my flagrant inflammatory remark was deleted by the Powers That Be and so no visual evidence of my misdemeanour has been left behind…

    On second thoughts if there is no evidence there is no crime, so fuck off poobag you twisted kiddy fiddler!

  37. Oh Imamofo, I heard you.

  38. The last one, “protective services” = Condoms. Ad = Guy and a little kid. You do the math. It’s really not so hard to figure out.

  39. Damn you curly you are the only witness standing between me and my interweb freedom!

    Please allow me to bash your head in with a monkey wrench and then flee in a OJ style car chase….it’s the only way I can think of to prove my innocence.

  40. #38 Dude! That is just disgusting.

  41. Mofo, you’ll have to find me first.

  42. #38… actually, the posts below pic4 state it is a security camera service advertisement… and some people are looking at a picture of a father/child moment of play and thinking it’s representing something perverted. I don’t get “creepy” out of it but that’s just me.

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