Be very careful, Juston. That party trick of yours can get nasty. You can fracture your dick for real, you know. I don’t have the time or inclination to go into it right now, but you should look it up, bozo. I think you’ll stop doing it after that.
I’ve been friends with calle since she was in the womb and let me tell you sir, she is most definitely an inanimate object humper. During the brief time that we dated I was forced to dress as a desk, night table and an armoir during any and all intercourse.