Monday, July 20, 2009

Time to Cut the Cord. No, Seriously.

Cut the Cord

previous post: Matthew, FTW!



  1. God dammit facebook, look at what you have done.

  2. some people have no fucking decency. i hate this person and their stupid baby. *HURL*

  3. Are there not laws against posting photos like this? Well there should be.

  4. This was done improperly, for what it’s worth.

  5. TMI!!!!

  6. If anything this person should cut the cord for their internet so they won’t post stuff like this

  7. LuckyJew

    *clap clap clap*


  8. Jayme needs some clippers.

  9. Jayme needs some clippers.

  10. Oh for crying out loud….!!!!!!!!

  11. Good grief. What IS it with people??

    Did this account post the conception of the damn baby too?

  12. Laughing Hysterically

    thats what the cord looks like? wtf. It looks like a bunch of gloves wound together.

  13. Many women turn their Facebook accounts into update feeds about their children. They swamp their profile with stories and photos of what their progeny has done lately.

    I suppose I would be that proud of having a child too if I knew that was the only mildly significant thing I would ever do with my life.

  14. the small amount of blood squirting out made me gag, i can’t look at this picture anymore.

  15. You guys should’ve really put some kind of warning…this is fucking disgusting.

  16. A. Thomas Newman

    You fucking sissies need to grow up – this picture is no big deal. It is definitely NOT gross. What do you think – babies come out wearing Osh-Kosh? TBH, that kid looks pretty good – not particularly purple or slimy.

  17. i agree with newman. this is not a big deal at all. theres is only a little bit of blood and the baby is all cleaned up. seriously u guys must have ridiculously weak stomachs.

  18. This is so inappropriate for Facebook.

  19. um, okay… i have no problem with babies, but on facebook? *shakes head* this is ridiculous…

  20. the cord is, in fact, being cut improperly, as Drew stated. It shouldn’t be squirting blood.

    But seriously, people, grow up.
    This is real life.

  21. OMFG


  22. All of you people are immature and lame for having such a reaction to something that is simply a part of life. You should be ashamed of your lack of experience with life and you middle-school-esque response to a baby and a bit of blood.

  23. Nothing wrong with the pic, per se.. Show them to your friends and family, but posting them on the internet for the world to see.. it’s just a bit much.

  24. Laughing Hysterically

    Actually…when I look at it again – A.T.Newman is right.. the baby is pretty clean. And pretty BIG and not red at all.. this may actually be a fake pic.

  25. bethany
    July 20th, 2009 at 9:26 pm
    All of you people are immature and lame for having such a reaction to something that is simply a part of life. You should be ashamed of your lack of experience with life and you middle-school-esque response to a baby and a bit of blood.

    Taking shits is a part of life too–I’ve had some pretty good ones lately but I’ve resisted the urge to share them with the world via a facebook album.

  26. Oh my god Bethany shut up already. Babies may be a part of life but we don’t need to see a bloody mess. Going to the bathroom, deadly car accidents and blow jobs are a part of life but are these posted of facebook? We don’t need to be see this either. The 1,000 baby photos and inane status updates this mother will give about her “gift from god, miracle from above”, for the next 18 years will be enough thanks.

  27. to Bethany,
    Its not that the people are immature, we’re all capable of dealing with birth and life and death. But what is getting under people’s skin is that this is a social networking site that has kids as young as 8years old that dont need to see this shit.
    Thats why its called LAMEBOOK.

  28. Okay… Newman, Nilly and Cavale… oh, and Bethany.

    you’re morons. i suppose everything flew over your heads. i don’t want to have to explain myself, but you wouldn’t understand otherwise. so let us elucidate. one, nobody is actually commenting on the birth of the baby, but the nature of the photograph itself. and two, nobody is actually commenting on the birth of the baby, but the nature of the photograph itself.


    letterstogod, well said.

  29. person who posted this needs to die in a fire

  30. Is it odd that the first thing I noticed about this picture is how HUGE that baby is!?!?! Screw the damn blood and cord! Pushing a baby THAT huge must hurt like a mofo! Poor mommy. Unless it’s fake lol.

  31. Is it just me..or is this one of those freedom of choice things?

    If it disgusts you dont look. No need to censor FB.

  32. wtFights! wtFights! I love it!

  33. Blech, this is the grossest thing on Lamebook I think.

  34. This takes child porn to a whole new level.

  35. Matt,

    Freedom of choice is not a freedom granted to anyone by any constitution or letter of law. Maybe freedom of speech or religion, but freedom of choice would essentially allow any one to do anything anytime they wanted. So no…this is not “one of those freedom of choice things.” Facebook should indeed be censored, as it is a privately owned social networking site. The site admins could have, and definitely should have, censored this picture.

    I hate to make this post sound so immature, but you are a retard.

  36. A. Thomas Newman

    It is nice to see many of you equating the birth of a child to taking a shit, car accidents, and blowjobs. It is so great to know I share the Earth with such fucking degenerates.

    - Is this picture TMI? Probably
    - Is it gross or inappropriate? No
    - Should it be censored? Fuck no

    Anyway, the last I checked, I only see pictures and posts from people on my friends list or when my friends are tagged. Therefore, if one of your friends posts a picture like this, then un-friend them, berate them, or simply do not look at it.
    If you cannot handle this simple picture, that’s fine – your maturity level is your business, but don’t pretend like it is being forced on you or shoved down your throat. In fact, you probably would never have seen this picture were it not for Lamebook, so I suggest you never come back to LB again. I, for one, will not miss you.

  37. A. Thomas Newman

    Before you set out to call anyone a moron or imbecile, please learn how to read. Once you have done so, please read my original post again. When you do read it, you will see that my post is about the nature of the photograph and not about childbirth in general.
    I do not expect, or want, your agreement. In fact, I fact I am sure I would feel more comfortable, given your apparent intellectual challenges, that you did not agree with me. However, I would hope that you base your disagreement with my post on what I actually did post, not on something you contrived in your own, somewhat limited, mind.

  38. Sebastian the Crab from Little Mermaid

    A. Thomas Newman. Dont you have something better to be doing than writing a fucking book in this comments section?

  39. A. Thomas Newman

    Sebastian – yeah, maybe.
    Don’t you some King Triton ass to kiss?

  40. I feel sorry for the baby. personally, i wouldn’t want a picture of MY umbilical cord floating around the internet

    parents these days

  41. 14 year old girl needs mindbleach. Now.

  42. A. Thomas Newman … you responded to Sebastian’s comment. I thought you weren’t coming back!

  43. Awesome photo! Whoever submitted this is probably some jealous 47 year old who hasn’t [and/or can't] conceive. Haters.

  44. A. Thomas Newman

    Kevin – I never said I was not coming back.


  46. Oh God, we don’t care about the cord, WE DON’T CARE ABOUT THE CORD!

  47. Deer A. Thomas Newman,

    U r verry smrt cuz u use words like “equating,” and “the.” But eberyone here think ur stoopid.


    N. Hippolyta Poppencorker

  48. Christ, stop crying about a photo of a newborn baby. By the reactions you’d think they’d posted an animated gif of a person getting beheaded with a saw or something.

  49. Lily- I agree with you. I’m more creeped out that this will be on the internet forever. How strange would it be to grow up and then find pictures of your cord being cut on your mom’s old facebook account? A lot of these facebook parents don’t seem to think about the permanency of uploading photos on the internet.

  50. A. Thomas Retard

    hahahaha… what a dipshit. A Thomas, get a life.

  51. A. Thomas Newman

    Good one, Retard. I’m crushed.
    Please help me to be as cool as you.

  52. UGH HELL NO. That is so disturbing, man.

  53. That looks fake as hell actually

  54. OMG. :O this is like the sickest picture i’ve seen. x|

  55. Joydivisionthecure

    Sebastian the Crab from the Little Mermaid is a fucking brilliant name.

  56. How embarrassing for that family. It’s not an issue of gross or beautiful here, it’s the fact that this should not be posted on facebook because a) no-one wants to see it and b) like Lily said, how would you feel if there was a picture of someone CUTTING YOUR UMBILICAL CORD on the internet.

    Where did decency go?

  57. Gah, my eyes…..

  58. A. Thomas Newman Needs To Shut Up

    Facebook friends don’t need open their homepages and see this shit. You want to share offer it but to post it in your albums so every single one of your friends see on on their homepage is inappropriate.

  59. UGH Why do people even argue about whether or not this is appropriate? It doesn’t offend me, but it does make me uncomfortable to think that everyone on this persons friends list can see this image. It’s kind of a personal moment, and I know I wouldn’t want people other than close family seeing a photo of me getting my umbilical cord cut. I understand people like to take and share photos of their children, but I also think parents should be more considerate when deciding what photos of their children they will put online. Maybe a nice family portrait would be more appropriate?

  60. Crotch fruit is nasty, and people who base their entire lives around what their fuck trophy is doing really disgust and disappoint me. This is NASTY. Babies are NASTY. Blood should NOT be coming out of this. It’s just not appropriate. No one wants to see your slime-covered spawn, and the incompetent poor fool who you trapped into getting married and reproducing with.

  61. jayme should have cut his fingernails.

  62. scary.
    this makes me want to cry.

  63. O GOD, DNW.

  64. i dont see what the big deal it??? except that it should not really be bleeding (cord is meant to be cut after it stops pulsating).

    maybe it’s because i’ve had two kids. it’s not a picture i’d out up on facebook…but each to their own

  65. Why post this on Facebook? Cause to be honest, no one gives a shit about your baby.

  66. While I love my kids the placenta and the cord were total nightmare fuel. My husband was coerced into cutting our daughters cord and he commented on how he had to saw through it. Would I put pics of it on f.b? Hell no. As much as I love the little buggers that is tmi. I wont even put pics of her naked bum on my page. Not that there is anything wrong to those who do. I just want to save those for when her b.f’s and my sons g.f’s come over. That when the bare bum pics should be paraded out.

  67. I just wonder how that baby will react many years later if he/she ever ends up seeing this picture. Some parents take things too far by allowing the entire public to see thousands of pictures of their children on the internet.

  68. Before I had kids I always thought I would never be one of thos smug mums who parade their kids on facebook… But I do… I’m not ashamed to acknowledge that having & raising my children IS the most significant thing I will do with my life, & maybe parents that don’t have that attitude are responsible for people like the douche that thinks of babies as ‘gross’ & little more than a ‘fuck trophy’… That said, a relative of mine put her birth photos on facebook a while ago, & while not disgusted or offended, I was embarrased for her & her child. I really do wonder how all these kids who have had their extra personal photos put on the Internet will feel about it one day… Wouldn’t want everyone I have on facebook to see my babies naked.

  69. Hey, if you don’t wanna see my baby or anyone elses, dont fucking LOOK. I am sure this persons profile was private and one of their jackass so called friends went into their album and took this screenshot to send away. They were not showing the world but you this website are now.

    Grow the fuck up, when you have a baby, it will mean this much to you.

  70. To the parents defending their poor choice in action….NO ONE will care as much about your crotch fruit as you! Even if this was in a private album some parents are narcissistic enough to have this go to news feed over, and over, and OVER again. Making sure that EVERYONE on their friend list sees the fruits of their labour.

    Get over it. Just because you tear out your va-jay-jay in the hopes of selfishly and narcissistically living forever through your spawn doesn’t mean that anyone have to give two shits about it.

    And for the record saying “I never thought I’d be on of those people” doesn’t make you cool…it just highlights how vapid and one dimensional you and your life is. It is as if you are incapable of being more than on thing in the realm of your life. Either it’s “mommy”, or it’s “wife” or it’s “psychotic anal retentive student”. Makes me wonder how you would ever cope if someone told you that you were a “hot mommy’. You’re head just might explode! I mean…that’s two descriptors and we all know that parents can only identify with one.

    GET a fucking clue. No one cares as much as you!

  71. Whats up STFUParents? You sterile or something?

  72. I don’t see what the problem is here. People get really angry about the wrong things.

    STFUParents, I agree, some people are one dimensional. But that applies to people who don’t have children as well.

    And no, not everyone cares as much as *I* do about my child. But the people who are on my friends list care some. A persons facebook page is not required reading for anyone.

  73. Oh god damn it I was freaking eating when I saw that!! I have never dry heaved so much in my life *gag*

    And 90% of the times your friends don’t give a damn about your baby either, they just make pretend they do to seem polite so please parents keep this crap to yourself.

  74. What the hell!
    damn it!

    The caption of the post says it all!!!

  75. when i had my baby they asked if i wanted to cut the cord. I said is there nobody more qualified in here

  76. Holy shit, that’s fucking sick.

  77. The colour of the blood on the baby suggests a second degree tear. All in all, a good birth. Pink baby, crying (as per photo), what’s sick about it? If we could see the cord coming out of the mothers vagina and about to be cut…yeah that would be a little inappropriate.

  78. For parents coming on here and defending this picture, I only have one thing for you.

    You seem like great role-models, especially the ones throwing the F-bomb around and other numerous swears.

    As for this picture, it looks fake to me. Just saying.

  79. Ok I get posting pictures of your baby, but not this! FFS!

    We get you’re proud of pushing something the size of a chair out of your vagina , but do we really have to see the aftermath?

    I think not…..

  80. Um…whether or not this picture is FB material, that cord should be CLAMPED and NOT squirting blood like that. Whoever is responsible for this should be stabbed in the leg with a fork.

  81. Oh my fuck that’s sick

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