2: Silly whore biscuit, slut bag, slag.. ho..yeah
3: Thanks, anagram for Misslowkey, I’ll remember that. I’m actually due now, although my provider of sex is sadly on the west coast. =( I guess some toys aughta loosen up the ol’ meat racks for that horrid painful metal instrument…*shudders and cries*
1. sounds like it was copied.
2. why share this? i didn’t know it was possible to be slutty and geeky at the same time.
3. should you have sex with a douche to be extra safe?
4. i think she is still passed out and the boyfriend posted this on her account.
I’m with Keona, I’ve only seen metal. I probably won’t ask though, I try to get in and out as fast as I can.
Rosie, if you’re a girl at University and you have to try to get laid, you’re doing it wrong.
…at least I didn’t have to try
Often times, when I read these posts, I make the careless mistake of skipping over the person’s name, usually thinking that isn’t really relevant to the post. Naturally, I did this for the last post here and assumed it was a guy, and thought nothing of it. Now, looking back and finding out that Jemma is a GIRL… it’s just… awkward.
someone should tell mrslowkeyfabulous that those are all the things you’re NOT supposed to do before a pap because it could mess with the test results. always hate having to go without sex two days before the OBGYN….there is nothing pleasant about visiting the lady doctor
If ever I have great grandkids in the distant future, and I was rambling on about my youth, this is how I’d start an October 2010 story: “Well kids, I remember Pointing Out The Obvious Week ’10 … there were all these stupid people that had to point out the joke. A wise man named Dukey Smoothy buns pointed out their errors but they were too stupid to understand, you see stupid is incurable…”
Mrslowkeyfabulous’s doctor is trying to make more money off her by making her come back when her pap results are skewed due to her activities, and then seeing her again to treat the raging yeast infections and other disorders caused by douching and feminine deodorant.
@mcsqueeky, THANKYOU. It never ceases to amaze me how many ladies know nothing about their vaginas. Douching is unnecessary, ridiculous and HARMFUL. Can you say “hello yeast infection!”
As for feminine deodorants, I don’t know about anyone else, but I’m really sensitive to perfumes, especially in that area. But even so, feminine deodorants are also completely unnecessary. I don’t use them and my vagina smells great.
The second-to-last one is stupid. You aren’t supposed to put ANYTHING up there before a pap, otherwise your cells could expand and look cancerous. I learned this the hard way. Thanks, cancer scare at 17.
How does Jemma’s hole number make a difference in how many times she got lucky in one night? It is still limited to three at a time (or five, I guess). But she can do an arbitrary number sequentially. It is the difference between parallel and series so to speak.
Guys on the other hand are limited to basically one at a time. I mean you can have other girls present, and I suppose you could have oral sharing, but…
alordslums, she could also get more by just using multiple guys in one hole. My point is, the number of holes doesn’t seem as relevant.
I’m thinking I read it wrong though. Her point is not that the number of holes was what allowed her to get lucky multiple times (although it does sound like that’s her claim); her point is that she enjoys having stuff in all her holes (not necessarily at the same time, though it sounds like she wouldn’t object).
The look does indeed work as a substitute – however there are a subset of us guys who don’t pick up on the subtle visual cues and need to be bashed over the head with the meaning to understand. I was hedging the bet for them.
something similar but not as embarrassing as trevor’s happened to me before:
I walked into a 7-11 and was amazed at their awesome selection of music (Desmond Dekker, old school ska/reggae). I made a point to bring it up with the cashier, she just gave me a weird look. It was then I noticed that my headphones around my neck were the source…
Comments and Curlybab, I didn’t realize my wife was interested in me until the second time she kissed me. The first time, I assumed it was a mistake. Also she was lying on top of me at the time. She said this should have tipped me off.
Anyway, suffice it to say that sometimes, explicit statements of intent are necessary for certain guys like me.
MyJob, admitting to liking ska and reggae does sound embarrassing.
mad2, I just registered to say that ska and reggae are definitely the most repulsive types of music in the universe, and I dunno why anyone likes ‘em. Especially Bob Marley’s early work like “Pyaka” and “One of Coffee”, and Gregory Isaacs…particularly “Night Nurse”. OH and let’s not forget Peter Tosh and Third World. Ew. I shudder to think what would have happened to the state of music if Lady Gaga haden’t come on the scene.
Junebug, music would have done just fine without Gaga, with the likes of Black Sabbath, Trent Reznor, Marilyn Manson, Apocalypse Díldos, Skinny Puppy, Disturbed, Cubanate… and Amy MacDonald.
Frankly I am not a fan of Gaga. Not only is her music sub-par, but she is, in essence, the facade of an huge corporation.