Friday, October 9, 2009

Thanks Alissa


previous post: And the Winner Is …



  1. Yes Jennifer. Take out as many other people as you can when you finally lose it.

  2. ooh, truth hurts

  3. & so eloquently said.

  4. Ouch!

  5. Alissa is the shit

  6. Alissa needs to shut the fuck up and help her friend

  7. Alissa couldn’t have gotten more right. Alissa is helping her realize that no one wants to be around someone who wallows in self-pity.

  8. Alissa needs to hand Jennifer a sniper rifle and point her towards the nearest bell tower.

    In other news, LOL white people.

  9. @ Boz, that wasn’t a Wonder Showzen reference was it?

  10. Alissa is awesome.

  11. No, Jennifer, you were a nobody when you entered the relationship, too. That’s what separates you from the rest of us who don’t end up lambasted on Lamebook.

  12. @ BooBoo, you’re a fool. Alissa was right. You should never indulge people that just want to throw themselves a pity party.

  13. i’ll bet jennifer thought alissa was such a bitch for writing that but from where I sit, alissa is probably the best friend jennifer has for being straight with her.

  14. Saying that to her on an equally public platform is equally lame. She could have sent her a private message if she’s such a great friend instead of potentially embarrassing her. I know, she started the ball rolling on embarrassing herself with her updates, but come on. Alissa’s kind of a bitch.

  15. I agree with Jules 100%.


    @Jules – you’re probably right. If Alissa was trying to do the right thing, she would have sent that message over a more intimate means of communication. But who says Alissa was trying to do the right thing? Maybe Alissa just couldn’t take the self-thrown pity party anymore and snapped. I think that’s more forgivable than 2+ day public display of patheticness. Remember, it’s Jennifer that’s on lamebook, not Alissa.

    I can’t stand people like Jennifer. If she was truly hurting she’d be curled up in a ball by herself too hurt to let the world know just how terrible she was doing. Jenifer is the type of girl that lives and dies with every moment of her life, has fallen in love with every man/woman/child she’s had a relationship with and has probably acquired a dozen or more future husbands. This is nothing more than a mild case of gas to someone like Jennifer. It may actually hurt for the second but the second it’s gone it’ll be like it was never there. Fake person.

  17. Thank you Alissa for saying what crosses my mind nearly every time I sign in to my honmepage!!
    In terms of “should she have sent it through private mail” yeah sure if it had been something lingering on her mind for a long time. As it is, I rather imagine it was an immediate kneejerk reaction to reading yet another whingy status update.

  18. Yeah, don’t post it on Facebook. If you really want him back, you should phone him – but not less than 300 times a day.

  19. she should txt him. i hear that’s really effective to win someone back

  20. @pb No, she should txt him AND call him AND send facebook messages AND call his work… :P

  21. @Jon


  22. @ pb and Konfuscious: absolutely. She should do all of those things, for as long as it takes. And she should remember to stick to a theme of ‘I’m a worthless nobody without you/ what can I do to make you come back/ if you meet someone else, I’ll kill myself’.

    Then he’ll definitely fall back in love with her.

  23. Alissa has made herself look like an insensitive twat. That kind of comment is just going to embarass Jennifer.

  24. Yeah, I think that was the point, but its not an effective way to get through to someone who’s looking for attention and mollycoddling. Alissa should have sent a private message instead.

  25. @alissa is a pathetic twat

    Jennifer embarassed herself. This is ONE example – for all we know Jennifer poss whiny shit like this every day.
    Obviously she was looking for some kind of reaction otherwise she wouldn’t have publicly cried for attention.
    Who wants to wager that “alissa is a pathetic twat” is Jennifer?

  26. No I’m not Jennifer and yes, Jennifer did embarass herself. But Alissa is still a pathetic twat.

  27. I fail to see why Alissa’s “pathetic” in any way at all. I think she had the balls to say what was needed to be said. Sure, you can be sympathetic to Jennifer’s situation but srsly, she needed a good kick. It’s unattractive and attention-seeking, the way Jennifer was going about things. Bo-ring.

  28. Ugh I have so many “Jennifers” on my FB. I told the one I’m closest to to cut it out but the other ones I didn’t have the balls. Gotta love that passive aggressive “hide” function…

  29. Alissa is being more of a friend than whoever else is just sitting there, silently rolling their eyes. Since Jennifer seems to only understand the fine art of publicly airing one’s feelings on facebook, it’s probably the only way to get through to her and crash the pity party.

  30. I submitted this : ) hahahahahahha

  31. I completely agree with Alissa, except in one regard: I love desperate and depressed chicks. They’re the easiest.

  32. @31 – No, I’d have to say desperate and non-depressed was probably better. Depressed = low mood = dull company. Hell I bore MYSELF when I’m depressed.

    That said, I think Jennifer could use a hug not a slap across the face.

  33. Even though it was cold of her, I FUCKING LOVE ALISSA.

  34. As much as I like Alissa’s response, isn’t this fake? Shouldn’t the most recent post be the first one?

  35. no. lamebook edits the images so the updates are from top to bottom, so it’s easier to read.

  36. I’m usually against suicide, but Jennifer is one sad pathetic sack.

  37. Why? Why put her down? Why not comfort her? I feel sad too and I feel like I need someone to help me so I put fb status updates.

  38. Oh no, For Kindness! You are about to get flamed.

  39. Maybe people should be more caring these days instead of being far too up their own arse to give any comfort to anyone else. Jennifer just needs someone there for her, like anyone does.

  40. Why would I comfort someone on their Facebook wall? That’s ridiculous. Any emotional exchanges I have with my friends happen in person or over the phone, NOT out there for the world to see. Jennifer is putting her personal business out there for the world to see … sounds like an attention whore rather than someone who actually wants comfort.

  41. so we have a girl repeatedly crying for help on the internet and then lovely allisa calls her pathetic in front of everyone whilst urging her to “go bigger”! allisa is the devil.

  42. Mags- because we all know how TERRIBLE it would be to show people on Facebook that you actually have a heart!

  43. @Brooke, I think what Mags is saying is that real life comfort is more effective and personal than “LOL S GON BE OK HUN” on Facebook, particularly when the comfortee seems to be little more than a frownwhore who dines out on showing the whole world how miserable she is. Any sort of comforting shown would probably be met with ‘NO IM SAD WAAH GUDBY CRUL WRLD’.

  44. lol.. I doubt anyone cares, but for the record, #39 is not the Jules who posted the two previous comments before that one. I don’t know why someone would do that.

  45. To all the children and teenage girls here – Alissa told it like it is. I dunno how many friends I lost because they acted like Jennifer and then took it to the extreme, and then when I told them the cold reality of it they snapped on me and said I was a bad person. No, people like that and Jennifer are just babies who refuse to grow the fuck up and insist on dragging everyone down with them. Real friends tell you how it is. Only fake friends tell you what you want to hear. To all the kids and even slightly to the admin of this site for the sarcastic title to this entry…Alissa had it right, so grow the fuck up if you don’t agree.

  46. There’s nothing wrong with what Alissa said. She’s just making fairly obvious points. Unfortunately I don’t think Jennifer is mentally advanced enough for that kind of reasoning, nor does she want to hear anything truthful. Too fragile.
    There are a few chicks like this on my facebook and I just ignore them. You never know what might tip them over the edge!

  47. Thinly veiled ‘You’re the ugly one of the group and we basically want you to fuck off’ post from Alissa imo.

    Friendship politics is an ugly thing :(

  48. Well said, Spike Nesmith. :)

  49. Jennifer is lame,
    For hanging out with herself
    After her homework

  50. HAHA
    Mr Haiku is the man.

  51. @”Alissa is a pathetic twat”- I agree that Alissa probably should have said what she did in a more private message. That said, she was still completely right, and the best friend Jennifer could have asked for by letting Jennifer know she was only embarrassing herself in posting the whiny, ridiculous updates.

  52. Aw, Alissa is such a supportive friend. You go, girl!

  53. Alissa speaks sense, but she could have done it in private message.

    I would have hidden Jennifer’s status updates a long time ago, though, so props to Alissa for still reading them.

  54. In ten years time, all keyboards will probably have a key that says Alissa’s wise words.

  55. currently weeping over my tiny penis

  56. Alissa is a bad friend, know it all… crappy shit bag…. its Jennifers page, let Jennifer run it… obviously shes trying to put her feelings into words to self heal.

  57. I’m a Jennifer and that Jennifer is incredibly EMBARRASSING herself.

  58. Just another wackjob female! Probably a freak in the sack, too.

  59. Why is this not in reverse chronological order, as it appears on Facebook?

  60. @ craig


    Why do your posts read from top to bottom?
    We edit them so they are easier to read.

  61. easy now CSD. I didn’t even know there was a FAQ section.

  62. i think jennifer just shot herself

  63. @ Muwawawawa
    Easy there, not all females r crazy,I think Jennifer shoulda thought about it before she aired her dirty laundry in public BUT if I was avin one of those days I would hope my mates would refrain from humiliating me further than I had already done.
    PS ur a total dick, n u wouldnt know freaky if it slapped u in the face, enjoy ur virginity, u will be together for a long time!

  64. Please stop typing like that.

  65. *The only reason i am commenting this is because i heard about it and was really really really annoyed.

    i think that amanda is a cunt for posting this and way out of line. yes jenn shouldn’t be posting her life story on facebook (cause clearly that’s what twitter is for~) but seriously, it was for her friends to see. IF AMANDA DOESN’T LIKE IT then she should simply delete jenn. SO SHOULD ALISSA. that simple. I actually know jenn and know what all these status’s are about and yeah they’re stupid but it’s her facebook for a fucking reason. get a grip. no one on this is better than anyone else. so chill and stop publicly putting people down because they have moments of weakness and post dumb shit on facebook. who gives a fuck? get a life and go do something. sounds a lot better than worrying about people’s status’s….

  66. @ dude: ‘jen shouldn’t be posting her life story on facebook (cause clearly that’s what twitter is for)’ ?!

    BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Yes, clearly. Thank you for that. Made my day.

  67. who is dude? haha

  68. who is dude??

  69. Who is dude?

  70. and then she hangs herself nice job

  71. RICK ROLL”D~~~~~ BITCH

  72. You can’t just SAY rick-rolled. You have to supply the video, and trick people to go into it, you fucktard.

  73. lol rick roll’d…it’s nothing like saying pwned. I wish there was a website for posting people stupid website comments, so then I could post this.

  74. I don’t think that Alissa was cold at all. Why should she patronise her friend? She did look pathetic. I wish I had the courage to tell my friends to STFU, some of their status updates are just as annoying.

  75. I think Alissa put it very politely.
    Me, I’d have said something like “Gotta make my FB newsfeed Emo-proof PRONTO, I’m kicking your whiny ass out of my friends list.”
    Or just “Bitch, please.”
    Less is more, sometimes :)

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