Thursday, December 8, 2011

Successful Stories

previous post: Excellent Point

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17 Comments

  1. Kristiana’s joke is older than the gilf in my bed.

  2. *sigh*

  3. THIS JUST IN: Loads of posts on Lamebook will consist of jokes you are already familiar with, some screenshots of jokes somebody borrowed from (cue gasp) another website, some jokes older than the internet itself!

    There is no longer any need to point out all the unoriginal ones in the comment section.

    (Passive aggressive *sighs* never welcome.)

  4. Internet Hipsters, they have read it before it was posted.

  5. I don’t get the first one.

  6. elevator… levels… get it?

  7. Forget the first one, I don’t get the last two. Or is it that they are both so unfunny that my brain decided to fart?

  8. **Stuck (either a penis or a knife) in – that should help with the penultimate one!

    [For the record I don't think that's logistically accurate but it doesn't matter, its a midly amusing observation with a small pinch of sexual humour thrown in]

    As for the last cluesless also. In what context would a cashier tell you to stay dry? During a rainstorm? At an AA meeting? In a Saw-like trap consisting of parasitical death beasts which are attracted by water? Or in some strange (probably American) small talk??

  9. @peterpiper

    I’m friends with the girl who wrote the last status, and she told the customer to stay dry because it was sleeting out.

  10. Kyle – next time just stare at them. If you can make it look like you have a twitch all the better.

  11. Pickles

  12. #10. Yes. Oh yes… but be prepared to fight.

  13. @ tweed

    Thanks for clearing that up, but I still don’t get it. Why would you say “stay dry” when that’s probably almost impossible. Surely thats a bit harsh. You might as well say

    “Go outside now and get absolutely pissing wet through. I’m gonna stay in here, chances are it will be dry when I go home, but you. Get in the rain/sleet/snow/tidal wave NOW. GET WET GET WET GET WET. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA SUCKS TO BE YOU. Stay dry.”

  14. Peter… The cashier said “stay dry” because of the weather. It becomes awkward to say “stay dry” to someone who is buying sanitary napkins, which are intended to keep one’s vajayjay dry.

  15. drchalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

    I just assumed “stay dry” was some sort of young person slang; like “stay classy” or “keep it real” or something equally lame. I still think that it should be.

  16. @ lol Thanks for that, totally understand the vagina bit.

    however.

    Don’t understand the weather bit.

    There is a dichotomy here: Either is it precipitating, or it isn’t.

    It it *is* precipitating then when you go outside (as you would after paying in a store)then you will get wet…

    But if it is not, then you won’t

    So where does the “stay dry” come into it – there’s nothing you can do to prevent yourself (or your clothes) from getting wet)

    Or is this just an USA idiom for valediction during rain storms?

  17. @peterpiper
    Yes. It is essentially a wish that, despite the weather, the other person will be able to avoid getting wet. It makes as much sense as “Have a good day!” No one (or almost no one) seeks to have a BAD day (and if they ARE seeking a bad day instructing them to do otherwise isn’t going to stop them). Saying “Have a good day” is just offering your hope that the rest of their day goes well, saying “stay dry!” is simply expressing the hope that they are able to avoid the rain as best they can.

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