Monday, February 1, 2010

Sub Zero

previous post: More Terrible TypOHs!



  1. Thanks, Brandon.

  2. Wow.. Just wow.. Although notifying the world of her STD’s kind of makes one assume that he has caught one of her..

  3. one off her*

  4. Poor Ricky, maybe Brandon knows this STD is one of the ones without a magic bullet….

    Talk about airing dirty laundry…

  5. She told you she had thrush didn’t she Ricky?

  6. This is why 14 year olds shouldn’t be having sex.

  7. I agree with Sensible Madness, 14 year olds having sex and using internet to post their thoughts… what kind of future we can expect from them!

  8. Now we are talking Lamebook :D

  9. This is also why you use a condom…

  10. Wait…

    1st of all “SHE” had the balls to go get better dick…

    She says he could only talk about it, but that simultaneously he did do it, but couldn’t hide it (The cheating).

    So she wanted him to, because she had the balls to, but he couldn’t, he could only talk about it, but he also did it, which made her mad, because Gregory wasn’t sneaky enough to get away with doing what she wanted him to do but that he could only talk about…

    But I think he did it twice in two months and she is not handling that thing that he never had the balls to do in the first place very well…

    Do I have it totally wrong here…? Maybe it’s just me… it’s like looking at a broken fractal.

    If schizophrenia is an STD than Ricky is fucked…

  11. Brandon deserves a prize.
    Well look on the bright side: yeah they may be 14, but at least Kaitlyn can’t have kids and make more of herself.

  12. @MikeysRight: FTW!
    @alproshazam: or I should say “Kaitlyn”… you are lame!

  13. Quality! I do love my Lamebook with a touch of crazy and TMI

  14. Hey sorry Madrid on fire, I was just having some fun doing an autopsy, is this to say your superior intellect can shed some light, because I just got a headache…

  15. I thought alproshazam’s attempt at making sense of the nonsensical was funny. I was having trouble figuring out Greg’s apparent ability to both cheat and not cheat at the same time as well.

  16. I must admit to having a little lol at the Mortal Kombat reference, that’s pretty fucking random.

  17. Thanks Sensible Madness, seriously he didn’t have the balls and all he did was talk about it, but she’s so pissed cause he also did it.

    Damned if ya do, damned if ya don’t, but what happened in her head…?

    Maybe she’s an intellectual sadist and her form of psychological warfare is based on the schrodinger’s cat model… he did both depending on which she can be more pissed at…

    I love that she posts it and then tells Wendy to mind her own business…

  18. @alproshazam: too much soap operas for you. It is easy, she is crazy and needs treatment. Where are the parents or teachers? How they can realize that this girl is mad? At least she cant have kids, that is a BIG favour for our planet!

  19. Put the claws away…

    I’m honestly asking, not being facetious or argumentative, maybe I have missed it, but where does it say anyones ages…?

  20. *I get it, possessive apostrophes- anyone’s*

  21. This is all poetic justice – the cheater gets cheated on, the whore gets an STD, and everyone gets a good laugh at the epic MK reference. Also I agree with the sentiments through these comments – it’s a damn good job that Kaitlyn won’t be getting a “babality” with that STD combo.

  22. @alproshazam: I hope, for their sake, that they’re no older than 14. It’s equally possible they’re mentally defective adults, but I’m trying to give them the benefit of the doubt.

  23. lostintranslation

    Kaitlyn’s tips on breaking up:

    If your man cheats on you, the best way to make a graceful exit from the relationship and to take the moral high ground is to expose yourself as a cheating whore who, in fact, thinks it’s a good thing when people have the “balls” to cheat (as long as they don’t get caught), then to swear at anyone who tries to comment on the state of affairs, insult your ex’s genitalia and sexual performance, and provide a forum for the aforementioned ex to publicly humiliate you with tales of your psychotic behaviour and sexually transmitted infections.

    And to think I’ve been doing this whole breaking up thing wrong all these years…

  24. @Madrid on fire. (NOT directed at Sensible Madness)

    I think Sensible Madness, made a throwaway statement, a joke :

    “This is why 14 year olds shouldn’t be having sex.”

    But you grabbed hold of it and ran:

    “I agree with Sensible Madness, 14 year olds having sex and using internet to post their thoughts… what kind of future we can expect from them!”

    Where are the parents or teachers…? Probably watching this “Soap opera”, that I’m carried away with, but not you, you’re too sensible to make jokes at retarded lamebook posts…

    No one literally said they were 14, that sounds like it’s your thing…
    You however were having a rant on a tangent based on your inability to detect sarcasm,
    but the slightly broken English you type seems like it’s your 2nd language so I’ll not stoop to taking off the gloves over your attempts to mock me… Just jokes

  25. They funniest part to me was Carly’s, “Hey Girrrrrrrl”

  26. Kaitlyn’s sex is on fire..
    Well that’s what she told Ricky..
    Now Ricky has a burning sensation whenever he pees..
    Ricky should have known better when she was a dud..
    Brandon is a fortune teller predicting Ricky’s future..
    Gregory could also be bisexual..
    Ricky could have been directing the question at Gregory..
    The possibilities are endless..

  27. “It’s damn good enough for EVERYONE I know” In reference to her body.

    That sounds like a LOT of tests…

  28. @alproshazam: all this lamebook thing is about sarcasm, irony and making fun about stupid posts like this one. You are taking this personal when I was playing the same game. So just forget about it and let’s continue with kaitlyn.
    And about my english (the evidence that you took my comments in a personal way) in fact, it is my 2nd language and even when I could have some words misspelled, I write better than most of the post on this site.

    Where is Ben?

  29. Has anyone else missed the important problem in Gregory’s attack back? “…who has stds and have fucked more guys then I can count…”

    Erm.. One, two… umm… many?… lots?…

    And it’s a small blessing to know Kaitlyn can’t procreate at least.

  30. Hmm… Perhaps Kaitlyn should get with Ben.

    Ben: I’ve heard she’s got a pool…

  31. The only thing you said that was remotely sarcastic was to refer to me as Kaitlyn, the butt of this post, you haven’t attempted any humour yet, you were the one screaming for teachers and parents, yeah, I’m gonna cry myself to sleep tonight after your flaming. So don’t lecture me on things sarcastic and ironic, I got it covered
    You sir, are what they call in the chime industry, a bell end.

    In the immortal words of Tyler Durden
    “This conversation is over”

  32. @BlueSmarties: More importantly.. Why are these two still friends on Facebook given the apparent brutality of their past relationships demise?

  33. I like Ricky’s innocence, he makes out like he’s an innocent bystander in all this…

    @Lost in translation, don’t forget it’s Kaitlyns tips for breaking up when your man has both cheated on you and not cheated on you just talked about it because he doesn’t have the balls, and he certainly doesn’t have an unadulterated larger than average size penis either…

    Yeh, Kaitlin wrote the book on that shit

  34. lostintranslation

    @alproshazam: Ahh yes, I had forgotten about his talking about cheating on her but not doing it. See, there are just so many valuable lessons to be learned from Kaitlyn’s rantings. She is truly a very, very wise woman.

    On a somewhat related sidenote, your Schrödinger’s cat reference might just be my favourite part of this comments section :)

  35. @ Crackadackalash: Why indeed?

    @ alproshazam; LostInTranslation: Stop it. Kaitlyn only made my head hurt with her ‘logic’; you’re making my brain implode! Please, please don’t open that box. The cat will be dead angry…

  36. Crackadackalash said it, the possibilities are endless…

    LMAO @ babality combo…

  37. Finally, somebody calling out someone else for airing all their personal shit on Facebook. Nobody cares if you and your ex had sexual difficulties. Get it the hell off my homepage. Lamebook, this is why I love you.

  38. Madrid on Fire FTL

  39. @alproshazam

    Your conversation with Madrid on Fire was almost too easy. A great read! :-)

  40. Kaitlyn had sex with everyone she knows? everyone?
    no wonder Wendy is bitter, Carly’s rooting for Wendy, Gregory hates Kaitlyn and Ricky might have an std…

  41. Kaitlyn sounds like a real slut!

    Anyone know her phone number?

  42. @moomzi: good point.

    Wendy’s contradictions about privacy (advicing Kaitlyn to send an email using A POST ON FBK) shows she is jealous about Kaitlyn sexual activities. Carly only wants to appear in the conversation and shows she has friends. Gregory and Ricky should go to the get the rip of that STD.

  43. I want Brandon to be my best friend.

  44. LMAO @tinderbox

  45. Brandon FTW!

  46. kaytlin has sex with people then makes them friends on facebook. wow

  47. @Jackulahaha + IvannaHumpalot
    …shucks… I couldn’t of done it without them…

    Maybe I shouldn’t have evoked Tyler Durden, I was having fun…

    Ok so I’m a wee bit scrambled but does anyone else think it’s weird that Kaitlyn’s problem seems like a paranoid paradox regarding dualities…? (Bear with me) She essentially wants things she doesn’t want. Now, Madrid on Fire, in an excellent example of life imitating art, baited me, in an attempt to make me his Gregory. He even called me Kaitlyn, but I put this down to nerves. I was expected to be serious, concerned with the well being of the children and throwing my hands to the heavens wondering what will come of the next generation (it’s ok, they’re not really kids), but I didn’t have the balls to be sarcastic, which is what lamebook is all about. A concept like sarcasm escapes me entirely, even to this moment. So, in summary while I was worried about the kids I was also not being sarcastic at all because that’s upsetting but it’s what you do on lamebook but…. fuck Madrid on FIre was right, too much soap operas for me!!!!

    …and I confess, I am Kaityn, you should have listened to the Spanish harbinger when you had a chance mwa hahahahaaaaaaa…

    Yeh, I don’t know what sarcasm is.

  48. Brandon sealed the deal! One of the best Lamebooks ever!

  49. I can’t believe that you were waiting for my comment Alproshazam. Again, I prove that you got my comments in a personal way. GET.A.LIFE!
    An about the “schrodinger’s cat model”, Are you trying to be smartass here? Please, I bet the only time you heard this was in the movie “A serious man” and you are trying to undersatnd it and even when you used wikipedia, you don’t get it. Again, GET.A.LIFE!

  50. there’s never been a Kaitlyn who has been a complete bitch

  51. lostintranslation

    @alproshazam: An observation on your last post (#47)

    “Now, Madrid on Fire… baited me, in an attempt to make me his Gregory”
    “…but I didn’t have the balls…”

    It appears Madrid on Fire has succeeded in making you his (ball-less) Gregory, does it not?

  52. I am starting a New religion with Brandon as my god!

  53. @Madrid on fire, no I haven’t seen that movie yet, but thanks for the recommendation.
    Yeah dude, I was “trying to be smartass” everywhere, isn’t that in your teachings.

    Sarcasm and not taking it personally. C’mon, read it back, I was quite peaceful the whole time, you brought the noise, now don’t get all sooky, just because I owned your arse… (The worst I called you was the Spanish harbinger, and I thought that was kinda nice) this situation is redolent of a certain video game:

    “Finish Him”

    To which for anyone from a point outside of the event (That has no way of certainly knowing the outcome) has to assume, until they see if I finish you or not, that either outcome has been achieved simultaneously and until it is observed and proven beyond doubt which outcome has transpired. Certain branches of metaphysics say that there are parallel realities existing until observation, the so called “many worlds” interpretation… (This is all I know, I’m no expert so correct me if I’m wrong)

    I was considering mercy but your insistence on pettiness and name calling and not knowing when to SHUT UP AND JUST BE OWNED means I’m opening the box, Fatality…

    hahahaha kidding, it’s cool, just sarcasm, no one’s going to die…

  54. @mistaphill I’ve found that too

    Also, based on their maturity levels, I’m surprised by the level of english they have accomplished. I was expecting one of those imposssible hard to read posts by people who think it’s cool not to write properly.

  55. @grammerpolice…

    I’m going out on a limb but maybe you meant to type;

    “…was expecting one of those impossible, hard to read…”


    “…was expecting one of those impossibly hard to read…”

    But when you read this post, is what you’re concerned with really “proper writing”?
    My attention was drawn elsewhere, just sayin’…

    disclaimer: all entries under this username are prone to scads of technical errors of all descriptions, that’s why I’m not called grammerpolice, for instance… I don’t care if I miss a keystroke, this shit happens!

  56. Brandon is my hero.

  57. this might be my favourite lamebook yet.

  58. I heart Brandon.

    I’m still trying to figure out why people feel the need to publicly display their dirty laundry. That’s in poor taste, regardless of what was done. Kaitlyn is an immature ass.

  59. So much better than The Bold and the Beautiful

  60. Oh yeah, of course, I totally forgot to mention that I thought Brandon was cool.

    I got sidetracked, sorry folks, I’m out now, promise…

    @lostintranslation – somewhere in the haze you will find the truth. I will refer you to both @12 where I am initially exposed as Kaitlyn. Add to this @47 where I confess that I am indeed her.
    The evidence is overwhelming, that I am Kaitlyn, and not, as you might put it, the “ball-less” Gregory.

    But thanks for the laughs, it was a real hoot Madrid on fire, I hope you’re not still mad…

    p.s. I’m not really her I’m one of the voices in her head.

  61. brandon is awesome. what a way to end it

  62. I don’t know whether to be appalled or awed that this girl shares my name. Atleast I know how to spell it.

    alproshazam: love the Schrödinger’s cat reference…we cover that in metaphysics.

  63. Please stop ruining a good soapie alproshazam

  64. Classic great Lamebook post. One of my favorites ever.

    Some people are saying that she shouldn’t post this for everyone to read. But if she didn’t then we would have never had this take place. So thank you Kaitlyn, if you hadn’t made this public, we wouldn’t have such a great thread and comment by Brandon. It made me laugh pretty hard in my cube.

  65. Immaculate intervention by Brandon. Bravo sir!

  66. For the love of all that is holy, alproshazam, please shut up.

  67. I love it when people mentioned in the post try to defend themselves. and only dig themselves deeper.

  68. Whoever submitted this:

  69. I can’t help but agree with alproshazam @ post #10. I was wondering the same thing. Greg’s damned if he does, damned if he doesn’t.

  70. Oh and I’m sick of page long lamebook comments. It ruins the atmosphere and I don’t like it.

  71. Beanstalker: by submitting another comment, you just helped contribute to your own dislike.

  72. Wendy speakin the truth !!! Hey girrrrrrl!

    Carly knows exactly what’s going on.

  73. @Melon Reaper
    If you paid attention you’d see that I said “page long comments”. Even with addition of this additional comment, it still isn’t as long as alphasdfzzooom’s.

  74. @beanstalker


  75. kaitlyn sounds like this girl my mate almost went home with once. she told him “the amount of guys i’ve slept with is the amount of hairs on my head”

  76. Brandon seals the lamebook deal

  77. Brandon’s comment is simply pure win, the rest of the conversation is lame as fuck

  78. Reading that conversation was boring right up until I saw Brandon’s priceless comment.

  79. Wow. I’m bored off my tits procrasturbating doing any real work…
    I don’t even remember writing half of this (post 47). Don’t drink and type kids.

  80. “i agree with Sensible Madness, 14 year olds having sex and using internet to post their thoughts… what kind of future we can expect from them!” one where people can spell, and im pretty sure it wasnt just this generation that had sex before the age of 16(or whatever the age of consent is where you live)

  81. People like Kaitlyn should be shot. A) She had the balls to cheat. B) Posting that crap on Facebook.

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