Thursday, December 16, 2010

Sementimental Moments

previous post: Thanks, Bob

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32 Comments

  1. When a girl ‘poors’ out her heart to the world about wanting your sperm… you know she’s a keeper.

  2. I hope Shane can run really fast and really far, for his sake

  3. Imamofo is gonna have a fucking field day with this doozie, I suspect he may literally explode.

  4. Holy fuck indeed. Shane, run! Oh you beat me wandr lol. She must be a real minger if she needs to beg for that sperm.

  5. Ideed, Evelyn.
    Zac, how could you let it slip through your fingers…you know that can not only be used for the teeth or donating for money, right? It’s also a great hand sanitizer.

    Shane, you need a restraining order, a fast set of wheels, and maybe even a whole identity change. Unfortunately, Kim sounds so batshit crazy, she may recognise you no matter what you change.

  6. Although desperate does it for some… Desperate-would-do-anything… Hours and hours of fun

    I should look into that facial thing there, if it can be any protection against the cold winter’s wind…

  7. Kim, the master of playing hard to get! :)

  8. SPERM!

  9. Someone must have gotten into Kim’s account (I’m guessing it was a jealous ex). No female is quite THAT ridiculous. Seriously, that’s worse than a 14 year old at a Justin Bieber show.

  10. Julie should check out my facial salon, Spunky Visage Spa. For a VERY reasonable price either me or one of my associates will detonate a high yield dirty cum bomb all over her boat race.

    Zac, it isn’t true! The last time i tried donating my sex juice the fuckers at Oxfam turned me away, the ungrateful do-good cunts… I thought they were starving?!

    Kim needs to be put off a little, the obvious solution is for Shane to force feed her his chunky spunky cocktail relentlessly for two – three weeks. After that amount of time surviving on a diet of love custard alone, she should be a little less cum hungry.

    Phew! Fuck, this has got me little hot under the collar, i’m gonna wank off into a plastic cup and throw it at someone!

  11. Oh mofo. Your filth never fails to shock and surprise me.

  12. Mofo… I enjoyed “love custard” but I think my favorite may be baby batter.

  13. Hahaha love custard…. Gross:)

  14. @Imamofo make sure it’s a nice big load, and then toss it in said someone’s face. If you’re going to have a wank, why not do a good deed and give someone a facial? Alternatively, if you want to be evil, it burns like utter acid in the eyes. You might even be able to do a spitball trick with a straw for better accuracy.

  15. Chunky Spunky Cocktail – I think Ben & Jerry’s may have their next flavor.

  16. If men can convince women to purchase sperm facials, there will much rejoicing in the streets. It’s like two for one, sex plus beer money.

  17. oh, goodness. i think kim must have been drunkenly facebooking (perhaps, judging by the timestamp). i’m hope she’s not that outwardly desperate until she loses her inhibitions. unfortunately for shane, her underlying desperation is quite present and way scary.

  18. also, if you’ve not heard it, go download liz phair’s “hot white cum.” great song!

  19. I’m shooting blanks I’d love to let her try to have my baby.

  20. Shane was right on the money

  21. u spelt pour wrong

  22. You spelled ‘spelt’ wrong. There is no such word.

    Seriously? Getting paid to have a ‘sperm facial’…Or have I just gotten trolled? Seriously??? What will idiotic people think of next..

    Aww some more trailer park trash wants a baby to get out of having to go to work. When will these people realize a baby is more work than one could possibly know.

  23. Do have to post do this again…
    http://www.thefreedictionary.com/spelt

  24. Spelt is not recognizable in the Oxford dictionary. Not just some dumb website. Even when you spell ‘spelt’ on Lamebook it comes up as wrong. Idiot. Read a book. Internet can lead you towards to dark side sometimes.

  25. seeksimilf, I found this on “some dumb website.”

    Pronunciation:/spel, spɛl/
    verb (past and past participle spelled /speld/or chiefly British spelt /spelt/)
    [with object]

    write or name the letters that form (a word) in correct sequence

    http://oxforddictionaries.com/view/entry/m_en_us1293009?rskey=ShVAMo&result=1#m_en_us1293009

    Maybe you should read a book about British and American English usage.

  26. Hahahaha Dougie, thanks lol!! :]

  27. Oh, so that is Oxford dictionary is it? It seems to me it is Oxford University. Apparently they are two different companies.

    This argument is getting old and boring. Try spelling ‘spelt’ next time you type a post. You will see.

    Goodbye and Good luck.

  28. Oh, and by the way, I live in Australia… So the spelling of ‘spelt’ is not recognized here.

    Again, Goodbye and Good luck lol

  29. secksimilf, you’re an idiot. Please don’t tell anyone you live in Australia…you’re an embarrassment. In Australia we go by the British spelling..’SPELT’ not ‘SPELLED’ like Americans.

  30. @secksimilf, you are an idiot hahaha. It’s literally recognized everywhere as “spelled” OR “spelt”. And the fact that you got COMPLETELY bent out of shape about a fucking spelling “error” is VERY, VERY sad. Get a life, Kiwi.

    As for the rest of us who apparently don’t know how to use the English language, I sggst we strt tlkyn lyk dis, ha, ya, have a gud day!

    :]

  31. Sorry to all but while I agree that both spelt and spelled are correct I must say to @sasha Australians are called Aussies, New Zealanders are called Kiwis. Two different countries, two different accents. Clearly geography is not your forte.

  32. @bella89, thank you, I totally agree

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