Friday, April 16, 2010

Self Portrait PhoDOHs!

previous post: PhoDOHs! – “WTF?!” Edition (NSFW)

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156 Comments

  1. lol

  2. second. Ben.

  3. … Oh ya?

  4. and, again, what’s up with the bathroom pics. why, why, why?

  5. lol indeed

  6. WHat makes them think that taking a picture in a public bathroom is a ‘cool’ thing to do? Boggles the mind.

  7. The 1st pic is very amusing.

  8. Haha, guy in the last pic has baby hands!! You know what they say…

  9. Is that a bloke posing in the shiny black dress??

  10. @SeeBea: what so amusing about the first pic?

    @Jackulahaha: you know what they say: small hands, small ….

  11. @Gank: no that’s a chick. believe it or not.

  12. Christina.Willemina

    Is that 2nd one a guy?? Cause he has a badonkadonk.

  13. Ohhh, Sarah. I guess it’s a good thing you “dosent” care what people think.

  14. @dcrearview: Because it’s like, “Look how smokin’ hot I am in my bathroom and…oh, BTW, I have a kid.”

  15. @jackulahaha & @dcrearview small gloves???

    and i’m pretty sure darrius is a guy

  16. The last guy have very tiny hands….

  17. Darrius has quite the ass.

  18. Aren’t they all guys but the 1st one?

  19. darrius is a damn feminine guy but ive never known a chick called darrius….
    and wow….just wow for the first one…..the only way this could be worse would be if she was in her undies…i feel sorry for that kid

  20. No J.K. she could be doing duck lips. That would make it worse. Duck lips in the bathroom with a kid..no no no…in a public rest room.

  21. Darius looks like a guy to me… and why did LB post TWO pics of him?

  22. whoops. *darrius

  23. OMG i didn’t even notice that #2 may be a dude…but I think you have a point!! There are no boobs there at all. My vote (unfortunately) – dude.

  24. Exactly. How can you have a butt like that, and then NOTHING up top?

  25. I’m hoping Darrius is a girl, because she’s having pics taken in the Women’s changing room of some department store.

  26. To say that guy has tiny hands would be saying that he’s proportional and it’s his hands that are the problem.

    Either way his rings are sexy and make me want to touch myself.

  27. Darrius likes his PVC :/

  28. Not all changing rooms are segregated by sex…I know at stores like forever 21 where I live they just have one set of changerooms for everybody.

  29. The gawkers surrounding Darrius is the dressing room and the “No, no, no, noooooo” comment make it a pretty safe bet that Darrius is in fact a HeShe.

  30. Even the “meeee…..” in the album name looks flamboyant.

  31. @Jackulahaha:
    He can’t go to Burger King?

  32. Darrius is a MAN! I mean ive heard people being named weird things but i doubt Darrius’ mom thought het baby girl looked like a Darrius and why would brandon comment in the 2nd pic saying “no no no nooooo” and notice how the chicks in the back are laughing. Because it’s funny when a black guy dresses up and divas’ himself for the picture.

  33. @greesee great minds think alike!

  34. with the limited amounts of Darriuses (Darriae) on facebook I think we can confirm Darrius is indeed male.

  35. “on the out side in”…? What does that even mean?

  36. @snip it means she does ass to mouth.

  37. Sarah: A girl that can’t spell is a girl that is stupid.

  38. Is that a SYRINGE in Darius’ bathroom pic?

  39. @eepah: it sure looks like it.

  40. Or a tampon.

  41. Diabetic trannie

  42. Christina.Willemina

    You never go ass to mouth!

  43. Lookes, that’s funny.

  44. well something has to be giving him that booty.

  45. Who's That Girl?

    lol @ carmen! (36)

    I’ll never understand the bathroom photoshoot.

  46. Is Darruis a girl or a boy?

  47. read the other posts. there is a debate about gender.

  48. Christina that’s the general rule. However when you’re on lamebook those rules obviously do not apply.

  49. I like the wall hangings in Darrius’ bathroom. Tranny has taste when it comes to home furnishings.

  50. first one looks quite hot, hopefully the baby isn’t hers, be a shame to think she has a vag like a cat flap

  51. A girl that dosent care what she lookes like (sic) needs to go back to school, because if you haven’t got looks or brains your only realistic career choice is giving out $5 hand jobs in truck stop restrooms, and that’s no way to make a living.

  52. Is Darrius a chubbier version of Lafayette Reynolds (Tru Blood)

  53. Sensible Madness, someone’s gotta do it.

  54. bollywood_rocks83

    After being on Lamebook for months, me thinks the US govt should use these posts as a reason to mandate testing and licensing to procreate. If the pro-life movement isn’t against “murder”, maybe abortion can be made illegal(since nobody makes use of it anyway and clinics get firebombed by God’s servants) and a baby making license program instituted.

  55. @Sensible with the economy the way it is people are looking for outlets this includes sexual activities. If I hang around the unemployment office charging 5$ for an “outlet” I could make a nice living.

  56. @Ben…Lafayette has better taste than that.

    But seriously…Darrius got a DONK. Where is slimjayz to comment on this?!?! ;)

    “Way back in ’08″
    Was it really that long ago???

  57. bollywood_rocks83

    Soup, slimjayz and Sensible should hand out orientation lessons to newcomers. Christina, not being mean here but Lamebookers tend to go against the grain. Ass to mouth is the least of your worries. Wait till the threeway orgy with food products starts AGAIN.

    :)

  58. Carmen–you are HILARIOUS.

  59. Well thanks! I’ve been on this site for about a year but just now have found my ability to spread my wings and try this commenting thing.

  60. do you think Sarah made her own top?

  61. Darrius has two pics where he is clearly going for the girly look…So, I do believe it might be time to change his name to Darriann or something close….

    And no, his hands aren’t small, his body is humongous.

  62. Eyeroll — what does being slightly chubby have *anyfuckingthing* to do with diabetes? Some of y’all try way too hard to be funny.

    Anyway, I don’t see what’s wrong with Darrius — looks like he’s either a mtf or just a very flamboyant gay man. It just isn’t unusual to me.

    Rofl. Delon’s shoes look like she’s playing dress-up; they are WAY too big. And with a baby? Classy combo, sista.

  63. Hmmmm so this whole “Ben” thing. I’ve read some comments and everyone was always confused whether it was the original Ben or not. I might be crazy, but I don’t think you can register for the same username twice. You can only sign in to comment, therefore “Ben” has been the same person ever since. Ben seems to be talking shit.

  64. Sarah must be my soul-sister, as I also looke pretty on the out side in.

    I’m starting to think that image editors should require a spelling test before you can *~*~*~*bEdAzZlE*~*~*~* your photos. If you get 2/10 words wrong, you are locked out.

  65. @Noah BLANK: It’s not cos he’s fat its cos he has a syringe on the vanity….

  66. Or that AND that he’s fat….and being fat has A LOT to do with Diabetes

  67. Christina.Willemina

    Bollywood – 3 way orgy with food products? Did I miss something!! :S

  68. Christina…I’d let this one go too, sounds gross!! :-)

  69. bollywood_rocks83

    Jackulahaha, ever heard of Juvenile Diabetes and Gestational Diabetes? Maybe you should go tell that to a 2yr old kid with diabetes or an 8 month pregnant woman.

  70. Hahaha, yeah, I get it, type 2 diabetes is the one you get from being fat. But that doesn’t make your post make any more sense??? Your point (whatever it may be) is in no way proven by your comment.

  71. Wow, Noah. Wow.

    The following risk factors increase the chances of someone developing Type 2 diabetes: Increasing age; obesity; and physical inactivity.

    Reasons connected to all forms of diabetes: Reaction with a specific virus or bacteria; exposure to food-borne chemical toxins; and exposure as a very young infant to cow’s milk, where an as yet unidentified component of this triggers the autoimmune reaction in the body.

  72. The majority of people with diabetes develop it from eating unhealthy foods. Unhealthy foods generally have sugar or fat excess which in turn causes one to become overweight.

  73. @Gannet-There are over 3,600 people named Darrius on Facebook. That is a limited #? Please tell me you did not go through 3,600 people(not men, some of them are women, WTF?!)to genderify Darrius? That is dedication, to be sure! I agree that he is obviously a man though.

    As for the last guy, he doesn’t have small hands. He looks to be about 4 feet 4 inches at most. I think because he is so chubby everyone is assuming he is an average size man which if you look at the lack of shoulders and how tall he is in relation to the urinals behind him he is not. He is taking the picture from straight on yet he is still only minimally taller than them. I doubt he is as tall as my initial estimation.

    …And last but not least I been out of it the last few days(they upped my morphine so at least it was fun!) so I just read through the comments for the last few entries with a clear head this time. Soup and malteaser I love you both(even if I do crackwise on you from time to time) and am horrified that I was so out of it that I failed to protect your honor from the tools who dared to impugn it. It will never happen again. Christina W. just because someone does not agree with you does not mean they are ignorant and implying as much makes your to appear to be the ignorant one. Yes newborn babes as a miracle, I have a few of my own, but honestly few people want to see the naked newborns of those on their friends list. Will they tell you this? No, not if they care about your obviously fragile feelings but out of those 150 people, maybe 3 really wanted to see them. The father and the 2 grandmothers, and the father is iffy to say the least as I have heard many new fathers explain witnessing the birth of their child as something akin to an alien chewing its way out. Does that mean you should not put them on display? No its your profile, just realize that not everyone feels the way you do and that if they do not it does not make them ignorant. You do not agree with me, that just means you have a different mind and moral set. For those of you that like to rag on ben by posting ben for first, posting ben and then nastily telling others to check the comments when they ask about the meme is just as stupid as complaining about people that complain about first then do it first chance. So if you are going to post ben, please type up a explanation in your notebook and save it so you can easily copy and paste it when questions pop up or just give it up as nobody finds it funny anymore, few did after the first few days. Malteaser, Soup, Miss. Shegas, Mcowles, Seebea, Enerbl, Emkitteh, British Hobo, British Hobette, Lexluther, Elle Bee, and of course Word (and the rest of the crew that I can’t add at the moment because my fingers have reached their typing limit), You guys and Morphine = A match made in heaven! :) I’ve missed you guys. ((hugs))

  74. He still has tiny hands…even if the rest of him is small that doesn’t make his hands any bigger.

  75. bollywood_rocks83

    Jackulala, gestational diabetes is when pregnant women have diabetes. It happens. This is the age of Google. Bloody use it!
    Juvenile Diabetes occurs in children too. It’s not because they’re fat. Fucking go read a book! Geez or are you so content in your under educated state that you don’t know what gestational means and don’t care to look it up?

  76. Christina.Willemina

    Nonni – blah blah blah blah blah. You posted on the wrong page.

  77. Who's That Girl?

    In Christina’s defense about “You never go ass to mouth!”, she was just quoting a movie – geesh

    And the food product orgy discussion realy wasn’t all that bad…

  78. OMG why are you assuming I dont know this??? My cousin got gestational diabetes while she was pregnant. And I am fully aware that people have diabetes from childbirth.

    All I was saying to Noah was that people are not saying fatso has diabetes because he’s fat, they’re saying it because he has a syringe on the vanity….they also made drug references.

    Then he said that diabetes has nothing to do with being fat, so I pointed out that in fact, it does. I then later clarified (because you got so upset) that I was aware that this only related to type 3 diabetes.

    You make no sense at all.

  79. *type 2

  80. @Jachulahaha – Good point.

    @ Christina – No, no I did not, I posted on the page you were likely to see. The fact that I posted about about several pages should have clued you in, you know seeing as how you are not ignorant and all. Next time I will try to leave more clues for you. :)

  81. Who's That Girl?

    It’s okay Jack – I understood your meaning.

  82. Oh, and type in shorter paragraphs double spaced so you can sound it out easier. :)

  83. Who's That Girl?

    Wow – such harshness today. Now where did I put my bullet proof vest….?

  84. bollywood_rocks83

    “Or that AND that he’s fat….and being fat has A LOT to do with Diabetes”

    I believe that was what you said, Jackula. If you also knew about the other types of diabetes, why only write the above quoted?

    Sure, I make no sense but you’re an idiot for flip flopping when caught in a lie.

  85. Who's That Girl?

    Geez bollywood…you take it so personal. It was a generalized post about a link between obesity and diabetes. Does Jackulahaha have to put a bunch of PC commentary about ALL the facts about diabetes just to appease those who would be offended – I think not. It’s LAMEBOOK people!

  86. In today’s Lamebook comments page: pictures of fat people leads to boring squabbling about bullshit I didn’t read. Also hey again Nonnieyrissa! :D Yours is the only comment I bothered to read. Thanks for the mention :) But yeah, think you’re on the wrong page :P

  87. No I’m not. Noah said diabetes had nothing to with being fat. I said it does. You went crazy so I very quickly replied that it would only refer to type 2 diabetes (which I thought was obvious, since we were talking about weight).

    If I had said “being fat has a lot to do with all types of diabetes” or if when you argued I had said “well, it does” or “Maybe it just refers to some particular kind” then you would be right.

    If anything was wrong with it it was too broad, so I narrowed it down when asked.

    Then you started going on about how I know nothing about gestational diabetes for some random reason…

  88. He doesn’t have to list every single possible thing that contributes to diabetes for his point to be valid.

  89. I know that B.H. but I did it on purpose as if I posted on the pages I was referring to it would not have been seen by most of you guys as they were from the last few days. :)

  90. you all suck

  91. Ben, you are Frodo and you don’t have a pool. That is why you are so uptight.

    To the diabetes debaters: STFU!!!! Seriously. This is not a medical class, this is LAMEBOOK…We can post shit even if it is wrong info. Jesus Fucking Christ..Go to the diabetes website to post you facts, for fuck sakes..

  92. Ah, some people should be banned from social network sites, until they learn to spell. GAH!!!

  93. *your

  94. Also, #1: her name is Delonn? Really?

  95. @nonnie: Ahhh, that makes sense. :D

    Also, Ben… we’re honouring you :’( Oh, and you yelled at me once, so meh.

  96. Erm…….has this now become an educational comment page????

    I still believe taht short ‘n sweet gets more attention. I mean…..hands up who actually read 73.Nonnieyrissa’s comment???

  97. These comment threads have gotten way too contentious lately. You people need to borrow Darrius’ syringe and shoot up some opium so you can relax a little.

  98. I see nothing wrong with the first one. Is doing anything lame and horrible if there is a baby around?

  99. oh and Darrius is a hottie, no matter what gender :D

  100. @Ben: “vag like a cat flap?” really? things don’t change THAT much after you’ve had a baby. during, yes, but after they pretty much go back to normal. and why all the mama hate? a woman can’t pause for a minute to take a picture of herself while the baby is crawling around? why not? let me guess… because she should be in the kitchen making sammiches.

  101. @Nonnie

    for some reason I only get 40 people named Darrius

  102. @Nonnieyrissa
    Wow, that was so long.

  103. Me! I read Nonnieyrissa’s comment. Found it quite entertaining…

  104. Nice clothing there worn by Darrius.

    Brandon, a legend for expressing EXACTLY what I thought at first when I saw the first pic.

  105. Christina.Willemina

    Nonni – Your lame ass comments weren’t worth the 2 seconds it took to read them.

  106. @Nonnieyrissa – That is some speech :O I only read the part with my name in :D <3

    lol O.o

  107. Nonnieyrissa is Ben as Frodo without a pool.

  108. i read nonni’s comment!!

  109. Is Darrius the sassy gay friend?

  110. Everyone here must be fat,diabetic, pregnant or highly addicted to cocaine bc I sense A LOT of tension…handjobs all around! On me!

  111. MsBuzzkillington

    what does “cool na cool ang dating” mean?

  112. Means he takes from ass to mouth.

  113. So My thoughts of Darrius are that she is indeed a M to F Transgendered person. Perhaps that would explain the syringe, it could be used for estrogen injections. Which would make her behind more womanly. Perhaps she is early in treatment explaining why there are no breasts yet. More power to her and I hope she transitions well. If it is indeed a women then, wow. I recant all I just said!

  114. On a positive note, Darrius is posing in a clean and tidy bathroom!

  115. damn themz some thick chicks lol

  116. yourmotherfucker

    im with “ben” psuedo …or real ben,id bang the first chick….well when i think about it thats not saying much…wet and warm

  117. These comments are too long-winded for me today, so if someone’s already mentioned this, I apologize in advance.

    Poor Darrius, trying to take a “sexy” photo in some cute clothes. Too bad it’s clearly a Wal-Mart, and therefore any appeal that it had, is now gone. (Appeal? Pfft. Lol!)

  118. Holy Balls. Nonnieyrissa was funny..and Christina..not everyone has to agree with you; no need to be a douche when someone disagrees. “Blah blah blah”? Seriously? No intellectual discussion, no witty banter or debating? Instead you revert to Five year old? I mean..I have a child too…doesn’t mean I have to sound like her. :)

  119. @Mell: The whole signing-in-to-comment thing is a relatively new addition to this site. For quite a while, all you had to do was type a name in the Name box and a valid email address in the Email box. Commenters used to type the same names as other people all the time just to annoy them.

    On the diabetes debate: it’s pretty rare for someone with Type 2 diabetes to have to inject insulin until they’ve had the disease for awhile, unless they’re not taking their medicine or just not giving a fuck about what they eat.

    Darrius could be one of those. Or s/he could be using the needle for something else.

  120. @ nonnie, I read your whole speech.
    @ Christina.Willehmina your name sucks and your comments have been nothing but negative, abrasive and ignorant.
    As for the whole DM and weight debate. Get educated. Obesity causes massive amounts of DM problems along with heart disease, cancer, arthritis, depression etc. Bollywood should go suck his own cock for being such a whiny douche bag about how other people write.

    I think Darrius is a girl with a fat ass and a flat chest and diabetes. HA!

  121. Yesterday “abortion cookies” were funny, today we cant laugh at a fat tranny?! WTF is lamebook coming to?! :( lol

  122. haha look at that guy’s silly little hands in the last one.

  123. what assholes- you’re not cool you know!

  124. Christina.Willemina

    Slippy, thanks for your pointless and stupid comment.

  125. Christina.Willemina

    Frankie, A stupid comment requires an equally stupid retort.

  126. I had to make an account just to let Christina.Willemina know that she sounds like a bitch :) Shut up already.

  127. Chewbacca shagger

    @ Darrius’ first pic, “what chu talkin’ ’bout, willis?”

  128. All of the pics are desperate sadness. Darrius is a dude. I predict someone is about to be Benned.

  129. hmm, I have the exact same wall hangings as the ones in #2. But judging by the, uh, person’s clothing style & coins on the basin, I’m assuming she/he (?) is in the US & I’m in Australia. weird.

    yeah I know, boring comment but I just felt the need to point that out.

    carry on.

  130. I know a guy who has an ass like Darrius’. He’s not a tranny though.

  131. Let me translate that last pic
    haha cool na cool ang dating = haha my swag is so cool

  132. @Ben- seriously, why dont you delete your account and start over as an equally unlikable person (but one no one knows. You are Frodo, so crawl into your pool and drown… Ohh wait.

    @carmen89- are you sure you want the hand jobs on you? From the look of this place you may be quite slimed

    @ diabetic arguers- Everyones a diabetic…. and Fat, better. Get over it.

    @malteaser- …..Do you do ass to mouth? Sometimes its ok, lol.

  133. Christina.Willemina, if you don’t have it in you to accept another persons opinion gracefully, and retain the courage of your convictions without acting like a five year old, then that’s pretty pathetic. I shudder to think of the social graces you’ll pass on to your child. From what it sounds like, what you’re going to teach them is more along the lines of “You disagree with me? well you’re stupid anyway! Nah! :P ” It’s great to disagree; but to put someone down, or imply that they are stupid because they don’t agree with you is ignorant. A simple “I understand, however…I still feel strongly about what I said, and I haven’t changed my mind” is more mature than “blah blah blah” and telling those who disagree with you that their opinion is stupid. As an adult, you should know better and be more respectful of others opinions and their rights to them if you want others to be respectful of yours.

  134. If you are going to post those pictures on facebook for everyone to see, why not get someone to take pictures for you? They are already making asses of themselves, why not let someone else capture your true lameness like Darrius did.

  135. Delonn, classical desperate single mom. And Lord knows I love ‘em, cause they let me fuck out of my league.

  136. Did no one notice the guy is a Filipino? Maybe people from the Philippines have small hands?

  137. By the fuck, that is a substantial ass.

  138. Logged in just to tell Christina.Willemina to STFU.

  139. Ha, pic two. I had to widen my eyes to see all that ass. Poor guy… girl… thing.

  140. It shames me that Sarah has the same name as me.
    First it was the Sarah who didn’t know Africa was a continent a few days ago, and now THIS one.
    Fail. :-(

  141. I think it’s really inappropriate to post Darrius for being a transexual/cross dresser. If he was doing something silly it would be funny but it’s just photos of a boy looking feminine who possibly identifies with being female. BOO very anti GLBT!

  142. Honestly, whatever gender Darius is doesn’t change that the photo is horrid. Male/Female/What have you, bathroom mirror shots are horrid and always make you look like a twat. Especially with that badonkadonk hoisted up on the counter.

  143. I have lots of trans friends and I am very big on transgender rights, but Darrius’ pics are just waaay trashy, imo.

  144. Ack, please for my mental health don’t ever use that defense again, it seriously drives me crazy. Even if it’s true, which I really doubt, having lots of trans friends doesn’t give anyone a “free pot shots” card, having gay friends doesn’t excuse gay jokes, and having black buddies doesn’t mean you can be racist. If fact the only way you can excuse racist/bigoted behavior is if you making fun of your own race, or, if your a comedian.

    And, since you in no way insulted a trans in your post makes the comment irrelevant, You were either thinking bad Trannie thoughts and the guilt drove you to backtrack, or you’re showing off how open minded you are with one of the most over used, annoying, online defenses ever. Either way, stop it. I enjoy my sanity too much to have it destroyed by that comment again.

  145. Christina.Willemina

    Disdain, watch out. If you try to instill any kind of intelligence or wisdom into this group, you’ll get responses like “I just logged on to tell you to STFU.”, and then they’ll gang up on you like a bunch of 9th graders. It’s better to realize that you can’t win an argument with a child, and move on. :)

  146. @cursormortis

    nobody got your joke, it was actually quite funny!

    I was thinking the same thing, anyone who doesn’t get it take a look: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xu_bE7g2wqM

  147. @Disdain

    I wasn’t using anything as a defence. I was trying to clarify that I wasn’t “taking pot shots” at Darrius for simply being trans (apparently). I only meant to be clear that the only lameness I found in the Darrius photos was the trashiness of them, not the fact this individual appears to be trans. If you read the previous comments (many along the lines of “omg it’s a tranny wtf”), maybe you will see that I was trying to distinguish my perception of where the lameness in these photos originates as opposed to the perception of some of the other posters’. Essentially, my thoughts were that being trans = not lame but being trashy = lame. And if your sanity is so fragile, perhaps you’d best avoid sites like this in future? :\

  148. o_O Wow Nonnie. My brain literally overheated while reading your novel there.

    Also, I hate the self portrait thing. I’m convinced that everyone in this particular LB post is a douchecunt. Feel free to gimme a call if you are one of these people, and let me know if you are not a douchecunt. But you are. So don’t bother.

  149. My comment is awaiting moderation??? Damn FCC. Just in case, I’ll copy paste and censor (CPC)…

    o_O Wow Nonnie. My brain literally overheated while reading your novel there.

    Also, I hate the self portrait thing. I’m convinced that everyone in this particular LB post is a douchecXnt. Feel free to gimme a call if you are one of these people, and let me know if you are not a douchecXnt. But you are. So don’t bother.

  150. @ Darrius. Good God. I wouldn’t ride that into battle.

  151. @pooshashoo

    Uh, I know you weren’t trying to. Uhg, whatever I can’t keep up with what could likely become a long, drawn out, argument. Yah lost me one point in and I don’t even know where to defend when we are basically saying the same thing. As far as I can tell we both agree that you didn’t offend a tran, and we both think the photo is lame, whatever our reasons may be. We just disagree on whether I should learn to weather obnoxious comments like “I have a gay/black/trannie friend” or I should leave sites. I suppose till the right of free speech is revoked I must learn to to accept a slightly tipsy sanity level. But alas, a silver lining you have to tolerate my snippy comments about how I think that particular phrase is annoying.

    @ RubyPuppateaux

    Methinks he would agree with you, those only get that big by a complete lack of riding much of anything. :)

  152. whoa, 2 pics of the same person in the same post. Is this unprecendented?

    out side in what?

  153. since when does having pantyhose on your head (oh excuse, doo-rag) is cool? I don’t get it.

  154. hahahaha ohhhmy word.

    -Gods investment in you (His son!) was SO great, he could never abandon you!-

  155. Elixabeth, cut it out. You’re annoying.

  156. .

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