Thursday, October 1, 2009

Seems a Bit Harsh

Seems a Bit Harsh

previous post: No.

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83 Comments

  1. Uh.. WHAT?!

  2. are they talking?

  3. must be an essex (uk) thing?

  4. 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang-rape. Hunh. You learn something new every day.

  5. @knucklepopper
    maybe its a 9 man gang? i´m guessing the 1/10 is the one…..

  6. wtf is with the x at the end of every sentence?

  7. Truly the British are a bizarre and complex tribe. I’m guessing that Jeremy must be some sort of celebrity to have engendered so much ire from so many people–initially I thought it might be Clarkson, but the name seems too short for that.

  8. I think the x would be a kiss wouldn’t it? Do they talk like that in real life? It hurt to read :|

  9. I can’t read that.

  10. Wishing gang rape by ten men with HIV is a little harsh. However, I’m not sure how wishing they would play popular international card game UNO could be regarded as a bad thing.

  11. Yes, I believe they are referencing a celebrity :-) Basically the British version of Jerry Springer, hence the part comparing him to the Dalai Lama. (I’m a little surprised to see the names of celebrities blurred out!!) Also yes, the X’s are kisses.

  12. I can assure you that us ‘normal Britains’ do not talk like that!! Oh god I hope I dont!!

  13. Brilliant.

    Jeremy’s show is awesome. he is a twat though.

    This lot will probably be on the show in a few years.

  14. I believe that he is refering to JK who is host to a chav show weekday mornings. You know the kind of programme, DNA tests for slappers who don’t know who the father is, dysfunctional families, people sleeping around (sometimes kindly keeping it in the family and out of the general gene pool) also your every day skanks and jakies.

    This is a bit extreme but then again JK brings out the best in people.

  15. Jeremy Kyle!

    I don’t like the man or his show much either but all that seems a bit harsh.

  16. You’d never believe that the Brits invented English with what passes for communication for these gobshites.

  17. Sorry people, but it’s after midnight in my part of the world and I’ve a glass too many to even try to comprehend this shit but I know for sure that I am with Merani on this.

  18. Fucking chavs. So glad I moved home from England.

    Also, Germany Kyle, it’s ‘Britons’, not ‘Britains’. You’re not a herd of little islands.

  19. 9/10 people enjoy gang rape
    is a joke from sickipedia.org

  20. “9/10 people enjoy gang rape.”

    Reminds me of when someone was trying to convince everyone in the comments section of another post that all women have a secret rape fantasy. Male logic amazes me.

  21. I can assure you that the few decent Brits do not talk or type like that.

    To say they are proud to be English, they don’t half butcher the language.

    They are talking about Jeremy Kyle, chav celebrity numero uno. (YouTube him) Lie detectors and DNA tests for the feeble minded and the people that are incapable of wrapping a cock with a condom.

  22. @faux: they do dont they?

  23. @15-

    Yeah, because English is SUCH a well-constructed language. I mean, it’s not like it’s just a giant mix of tons of other languages, right?

  24. @21-

    The modern form of standard English, albeit influenced by the Romantic languages, developed in the British Isles during the Anglo-Saxon era. Nice try, though.

  25. No need to blur out Jeremy’s surname, it’s not one of their friends they’re talking about. He’s a chatshow host. Jeremy Kyle.

    His show is far worse than the likes of Jerry Springer, because he’s a self-righteous, smug arseface who winds his guests up to see if they’ll leap up and glass him in the face. I wish one of them would.

    Some classic Kyle moments: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_HQtj2xlJj4

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SL5l5wQVqCQ&feature=related

    A spoof that pretty much explains everything: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XZb9-7i-ncc&NR=1&feature=fvwp

  26. Blurring for consistency folks

  27. By the fuck, I wish I was the Essex Dalai Lama.
    By the fuck, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape?!
    By the fuck, where do people come up with this stuff.

  28. Oh, I get the 9/10 joke. Math is fun.

    I couldn’t read that. Is “cunt” not as offensive as it is here in North America? We (my part of Canada) don’t use that word much.

  29. @Faux

    Every girl I’ve been with has had a secret rape fantasy, but I can only speak for my personal 100% representative sample here, but…

  30. @24 Merani

    I do understand all of that, being British, it’s sort of drilled into me, as it were.
    By “they”, I mean the chav culture festering in the UK, not “they” as a nation.
    :P

  31. @Boz

    I think they may be confusing bondage with rape. I have yet to meet a girl who fantasizes about being sexually assaulted.

  32. Karl just wants a bit of the gang rape action

    @Boz I think by UNO she meant “you know” but felt the need to make her words into letters joined together and in capitals?

  33. This was confusing while still being vaguely depressing.

  34. Actually Faux, you may be suprised, but rape fantasies are not at all rare among women. BUT, having a fantasy does not mean you want it to become reality. A number of girls I have been with have admitted to having these fantasies.

  35. I’ve heard about this Jeremy Kyle fellow, and from what I hear he’s quite extreme and over the top. I’m guessing that his show has crazier guests than the ones from shows such as Jerry Springer.

    As for Daniel’s comment about 9 out of 10 people enjoying gang rape…what the hell is he smoking?

  36. lacking etiquette, but all valid points.

  37. BRITAIN: SPAY AND NEUTER YOUR CHAVS.

    That is all.

  38. This Kelly is obviously a stupid immature little girl – wishing HIV on someone is ridiculous.

  39. Mr Kyle is a legend. I wish death upon these idiots.

  40. jeremy kyle is a fuckin’ legend!
    i swear he’ll be gettin’ his OBE anytime now.

    also, cunt is a pretty common word.
    still the most offensive of the swear words, but still common.

  41. @30-

    Whoops! I meant that for @23, Rave. Sorry! :)

  42. @Maggie we may not be a group of little islands geographically but by the fuck we are mentally
    :)

    Jeremy Kyle is an arsewipe, and it clearly must be bad if his target audience can’t even bear to watch him

  43. hahah I like how his last name was smudged out.
    While I dislike the man, I can hardly see how these people are really any better than the Gypsy Puppet Master.

    I’d like to see the show where he reads this, hunts them down and they all battle it out like real chavs.

  44. @28 Persistent Cat
    Yes, that word is just as offensive here in the UK. which makes this post all the harder to read – awful!

  45. Maggie – thanks so much for keeping me right. I don’t know what I’d do without people like you constantly looking out for the way i spell…

    p.s. us ‘Britons’ love to be sarcastic

  46. Oh my goodness Im embarrassed that these fools are british! Obviously a bunch of Essex chavs. Now,I know alot of people from Essex and they are fab but these idiots should be locked away! Talking about raping someone (even if it is maybe meant as a joke) is just sick and pathetic.
    I wish they could learn to use proper language and maybe the odd comma and full stop.
    Reading that hurt my eyes.

  47. What. The. Fuck? Are they seriously talking about gang-raping Jeremy Kyle? Are they seriously talking about gang-raping anyone?

    Pricks.

  48. “I wish they could learn to use proper language”* etc etc

    FFS you cunts, y’reckon this might be part of the reason they’re on Lamebook?

    (*@43 sorry to pick you out in particular, no personal offence intended)

  49. I reckon they are so riled because one of their mates was on Jezza and he served them a slice of judgement pie.

  50. @roofie

    A slice of judgement pie. That and “by the fuck” need to take off. Say them to everyone you know, all the time.

    @Faux

    No, not bondage. They want to be held down and forced to have sex against their will. Honestly, until you started posting, I thought *every* girl had a rape fantasy buried in her heart somewhere.

    It’s all pre-arranged, of course, and there’s no suggestion of actual rape (which is not sexy at all, obviously). They just get off on the idea of completely giving up control. It’s just a fantasy, like a role-playing game.

    For instance, I might have a fantasy of bedding two 18-year-old Asians dressed as cheerleaders, but in reality I have a difficult enough time working out what to do with the one woman.

    Rape her, apparently.

  51. @Lithi
    I would willingly attempt to do so, but there’s just so *many* of them. And preventing them from breeding just isn’t enough – they need their tongues cut out and texting fingers removed too.

    Ah, by the fuck, let’s just kill them; kill them *all*. Preferably before they get to reproduce, eat or speak.
    Perhaps we could infect a large batch of Burberry-copy baseball caps with smallpox and distribute them to the UK’s market traders?
    Just a thought . . .

  52. Jeremy Kyle is my new best friend cos im off work
    i always wonder where they find the guests…
    probably same place they find these facebook posts!

  53. I hate how ‘of’ means ‘off’ and ‘if’ a lot. How lazy/mentally challenged are people? A typo is one thing, but just being lazy and stupid is another.

  54. This would be funnier if I knew what the hell they were saying. Clearly our education system is failing. These people can’t even write a coherent sentence.

  55. yeahh watching Jeremy Kyle makes me ashamed to be British
    but then I switch over to Ricky Lake and think it could be so much worse. :/

  56. People, people.

    “9/10 people enjoy gang rape” is a British joke, the 9 being the rapists and the leftover 1 the rapee.

    Jeremy Kyle, or, “The King of the Gypsies” is indeed a chat show host, who hectors our feckless underclass for a feckless underclass TV audience at a time when normal people are at work.

    Sadly, I have no idea what a lemon cunt is.

  57. the “x” means “kiss” by the way.
    it’s a british thing.
    we do it at the end of messages to friends.
    seems a little out of place in this particular interaction though.

  58. Thanks to for the youtube clips. I wouldn’t wish an HIV gang-rape on anyone. But this Jeremy guy is a total asshole. He’s definitely overdue for an ass-kicking.

  59. @I am me Just while we’re on the topic of spelling, ‘a lot’ is two words. I understand how that could have been a typo but so many people think it’s one word. Sorry to burst your bubble folks, a lot is two words.

    @Boz I said “By the fuck” to my friend and she said “what the fuck is ‘by the fuck’?” ahh such naivete

  60. Wow. I consider myself reasonably skilled at decipering moronese, but this was literally illegible.
    However once I understood that it was Jeremy Kyle they were talking about and not someone they actually knew, the strangely placed kisses seemed a little less inappropriate.

  61. @ English, or anyone else that can answer me – do Americans not put an x to mean a kiss? I genuinely don’t think I knew that. Is it just a Brit thing? Colour me intrigued.

  62. They’re from Essex…just ignore them.

  63. Where did she get those statistics? 9/10 people enjoy gang rape – I don’t remember partaking in that survey.

  64. Peta, are you really that daft? The 10th person is clearly the one being raped… hence why the other 9 enjoy it. Its a joke :P

  65. Peta, it’s been said in several other comments above that the gang rape comment is a joke. Someone even said it’s a British joke. Why would you not read other comments before making your own?

    @Faux I too know a girl who has admitted to having a rape fantasy, as said above, it is a desire to submit total control. Some people are into things others would consider weird.

    @hitmewithyourrhythmvic I think it’s a pretty world-wide English-speaking standard to use an x to symbolise a kiss, and an o is a hug xoxo :)

    The issue was that it seemed out of place at the end of almost every sentence. My guess is that Daniel is gay and it’s something they do after all their sentences. You also see it a lot between young girls to late teens.

  66. Jeremy Kyle is a fucking maniac! he flip-flops emotions quicker than Margot Kidder in a supermarket.

  67. @65

    Actually, I’ve noticed alot of my younger brother’s male friends do it too, and I’ve been berated myself for never adding x to the end of FB message replies.
    Incredibly camp

  68. I say ‘lame’,you say ‘ass’! LAME….ASS!!!

  69. I have only one thing to say in response to this post:

    lol x

  70. It’s about Jeremy Kyle – a talkshow presenter in the UK.

  71. its the name of a tv presenter he is a prick!!!!!

  72. can someone please translate this to english?

  73. Ah well, us complex Brits…

    They are talking about Jeremy Kyle who is basically like Judge Judy on a power trip. He has a massive gambling addiction but thinks it’s ok to judge everyone that comes on his show and he is full of absolute dog shit.

  74. Also, the word ‘cunt’ is considered offensive but people over here tend to use it as often as the word ‘Hello’. Usually it’s ‘Hello Cunt’

  75. queer british gotta put an x at the end of everything they say xx

  76. Actually, we’re not obliged to. Its just the Essex chimps in question that feel the need to …………….x

  77. #12- I get you, baby. I get the ‘Germany Kyle’ joke & I hate myself for it.
    The evil old Scottish bitch!

  78. Miss Bluetoothpaste

    Jeremy Kyle is a housewives/students dream!

    xxx

  79. What the…what is going on here?

  80. mike_hawkins_cider

    Sorry for being generic dumb Texan, but what the fuckin fuck does “chav” mean?

  81. Hi mike- hawkins

    a chave stands for
    council
    house
    and
    violent

    they are like little pretend gangsters who are all mouth and lots of crappy gold

    loves

  82. Actually Chav comes from a Romany (Gypsey) word, Chavies which means children, it’s a Romany insult to call someone a Chavey, it would seem this got shorten to Chav.

    Hope this helps :)

  83. Jeremy Kyle obviously.

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