Thursday, September 10, 2009



previous post: That Hit the Spot



  1. Look what Harry Potter has done to us all.

  2. SPOILER: Snape kills Trinity with Rosebud.

  3. Thanks for fucking ruining the movie Lamebook!
    Oh wait..I am over 15 so I don’t really care.

  4. So yeah, i feel like i know Alyssa. I’ve also felt like killing “alyssa” a few times.

  5. Oh no! He died?

    It died?…
    She died?…

    What’s a Dumbledore?

    Ah, I don’t give a flying fuck…

  6. This is why I hate Harry Potter and blame it for modern society’s downfall.

  7. Alyssa sucks.

  8. When’s Harry gonna graduate, what is he, 30?

  9. I have yet to see the movie so i am kinda bummed about the spoiler.

  10. Has Alyssa been living under a rock for the past five years? How could she possible miss that Dumbledore died? It was such a huge deal when that book came out, so what the fuck was she doing in 2005 why when that was NEWS.

  11. Hey Alyssa, did you hear? Darth Vader is Luke Skywalker’s father. Amazing, huh. Oh, sorry, were you too busy with life to go see Star Wars?

  12. Bruce Willis is dead

  13. Planet of the Apes? Has the statue of liberty on it.

  14. $5 says that Alyssa says she “has a life” because she’s too embarrassed to admit that she can’t read a whole book.

  15. hey alyssa… santa isn’t real, either

  16. oh, and doesn’t alyssa know all your have to do is say dumbledore 3 times into a mirror, and he will come back.

    sure, to murder her, but you can’t have it all your own way…

  17. Whoever hasn’t heard that Dumbledore died by now is living under a rock.

  18. wow – Emily has some seriously incompatible friends!!

  19. i heard dumbledore’s gay.

  20. IA with 17. It’s, like, an internet meme. And that cunt, Alyssa, claims that she has a “life” which is why she hasn’t read/seen Harry Potter, as if she’s too cool or too good for it…and yet she’s the one who goes berserk when someone ~spoils~ it for her.


  21. I’d be keen to see her reaction if someone pissed in her coffee or raped her sister.

  22. The said thing is Jezika, she probably would handle that better. HP makes people crazeeeeeeeeeee!

  23. Oh yeah,the ship sinks,Bruce Willis was dead the whole time,what else…?

  24. Soylent Green is people.

    And shame on all of you for not posting this before me. 23 comments. Hang your heads.

  25. Um… The Narrator and Tyler Durden are the same people…

  26. *person. Shit, sorry. Fail. lol.

  27. Dil’s a dude.

  28. Kristin shot JR

  29. and Maggie shot Mr. Burns

  30. all of that from a “wow…”

  31. Whoever the fuck…..WTF is that?

  32. I love how Alyssa learned nothing. The conversation is about why the people haven’t read the book and then Alyssa said “not everyone on fb has seen the movie”. THERE IS A FUCKING BOOK, ALYSSA!

  33. In The Village it’s not really the year 1897

  34. Verbal is Keyser Soze, and Norman Bates is his own mother.

  35. I still can’t believe Rosebud was just a fucking sled. Total letdown.

  36. Alyssa please die.

  37. Shooter is actually Mort Rainey’s darker side and is a figure of Mort’s imagination

  38. Oh and in The Others, they are all ghosts. That should bout do it

  39. , new news ppl,the yellow wiggle was replaced,!!!!!!:O

  40. Alyssa is easily the most immature person on facebook.

  41. i’m no lesbian, but! if the chicks are hot tell them to get naked and wrestle in jello. that helps when i’m upset.

  42. And also, it was earth all along…

  43. I would feel bad for Alyssa if it was 2005, but the fact that this girl waits to find out main plotlines from the movies is LAME. If you don’t read the books, you don’t deserve to care.

  44. lmao @ no. 3
    “oh wait i’m over 15 so i don’t really care”
    bah hahaha, I don’t like HP and still knew bout Dumbldore

  45. I see dead people

  46. 6 is such a shitty book that Alyssa is better off having it spoiled and thus not reading it.

  47. When the book came out, tshirthell made this tshirt:

    I just imagined Alyssa attacking someone in the street for wearing it.
    Oh no wait, she probably wouldn’t even have read the whole line on the shirt, because she was too busy with life.

  48. Who the fuck is dumbledore?!

  49. sarah sums it up i think.

    and o yeah, jesus comes back on the third day!

  50. Someone give this to Alyssa

  51. There’s someone living in the hatch!

  52. hold the phone! dumbledore died?!

  53. Everyone dies at the end

  54. Vince McMahon was the Ministry of Darkness’ Higher Power.

  55. Pssst…Hey, Alyssa…Fred Weasley dies in book 7. If you don’t have time to read it before the movie comes out, I’d stock up on your medication and disable Facebook for a month when the time comes.

  56. Yes because Dumbledore dying is the absolute only thing that happens in the book. Durrr.

    I want to know whose bright idea it was to remove an important chunk of information from the movie. Great, we find out whose book it was, but WHY?? They left out the entire explanation. They spent too much time being all “Oh, Draco found this magical box thing, let’s use the same footage from that three times.”

    Blah blah bitch I’m a nerd.

  57. Shut up, Heatherface.

  58. Donald Trump's Comb-Over

    I second Emlyn.

  59. Donald Trump's Comb-Over

    Oh, and Alyssa is fucking stupid. Go take your meds.

  60. harry potter should be getting his PhD wizadry by now

  61. Alyssa is a fcukhead

    Hey Alyssa, the “girl” in The Crying Game has got a dick.

    Go figure.

  62. Wait a sec, Alyssa has arguements on FB and she claims that “she has a life”? Isn’t that a contradiction?

  63. My Uncle Jeff used to read me Harry Potter. He would often play the game ‘robot reader’ where I had to move my hands up and down his charging rod in order to give him the power to read. If I stopped, his robo-reading-battery would die. Harry Potter was a page turner so I couldn’t stop, my hands got sore and my face got sticky–and when Dumbledore died, I stopped in astonishment, then HE stopped becuase I stopped! we had a laugh.

  64. Who’s going to tell Alyssa there’s no Santa Claus?

  65. Spoiler: AnonisGay is Uncle Jeff.

  66. Everybody eat shit

    Remember that movie memento where everything happened backwards? That was fucking stupid


  68. SPOILER: i just farted

  69. AnonisGay is that the same uncle that raped you? If not you have a fucked up family!

    I dont pass judgement

  70. I’m only dead for a little while. Then I come back in a fucking dream.

    Oh, and Hamlet dies.

  71. Although Alyssa is completely irrational, this update WAS posted two days after the movie was released…not recently.

  72. Every Harry Potter book/movie is the same. They have the same plot, the same character “development” and even the same structure. There’s only one person who’s allowed to get rich from writing essentially the same book over and over; his name is Stephen King. And you, Rowling, are no Stephen King.

  73. Someone should just tell Alyssa that it’ll be okay since Dumbledore knew about it and actually told Snape to kill him.

  74. teamlaserexplosion

    Dumbledoor dies and goes straight to hell for practising witchcraft

  75. Why is everyone having a go at Alyssa when she’s the only one that’s right here?! It doesn’t matter that she didn’t read the book, I haven’t read the books, who gives a shit. You shouldn’t say things you know MIGHT spoil it for others who haven’t seen it yet. Who the fuck cares when it first came out, Did you know that Sparticous dies at the end of the film? No? Because most of you probably wouldn’t have seen it, it doesn’t matter that the film is like 30 years old, I’ve just spoiled it for you which I wouldn’t have done otherwise. So the fuck arse immature bitch who said it and had a go at her including everyone who’s having a go at her here should grow up. Not everyone on the fucking planet is geeky enough to have read Harry Potter, some people just like to go see films. Dumb fucks.

  76. Hudson32700 September 10th, 2009 at 10:06 pm

    I still can’t believe Rosebud was just a fucking sled. Total letdown.

    That will have me laughing for many days to come.

    I hope Emily deleted Alyssa soon after this. I also hope someone “deletes” her permanently.

  77. Sarah & Alyssa: a match made in psycho heaven…♥♥♥

  78. Maybe I’m alone in this, but I fricking burst out laughing when I read Alyssa’s first comment. Way to bring the cranky, you crazy little monkey!

  79. aww shit she was away at camp ! Shes obviously so busy. I hate stupid tweener bitches even when I was 14 I couldnt fuck with the girls anywhere because of their dumb shit. Especially this one hoe who used to tell me to act my age when I was motherfucking 13, like wtf you slut, Im 13!

  80. All Hail Stphen King…all hail syfy channel

  81. cybervirgo – i already did ;)

  82. It’s geeky to read? What utter festering bollocks.

  83. Sarah – Thanks for fucking ruining Spartacus for me, I was just about to watch it.


  84. Not Harry Potter though, obviously. That shit’s well gay, like.

  85. Wow. Very few people on Lamebook actually make me angry. More just amazed, or full of laughter.
    Congratulations Alyssa, I actually want to plant my fist squarely in your face. Extra satisfaction if I knock out teeth.
    If you know who Dumbledore is, you know he dies. I mean how fucking long were you at camp for??
    Dumb bitch.
    Oh and by the way?
    Harry defeats Voldemort.
    Wow, bet you didn’t see that one coming!

  86. The Jenn *blur* is me!
    That bitch was dumb, who DIDN’T know Dumbledore was going to die?!

  87. alyssa cant spell manipulated

  88. If you don’t want to know the ending to Harry Potter, don’t read the comments of people who comment on the ending of Harry Potter. Leave Jenn alone. all she said was wow.


  89. @Jonas

    SPOILER: Harry doesn’t graduate because he has to go continue Dumbldore’s work and destroy all the horcruxes so that he can kill voldemort. Harry finds out that he himself is a horcrux because when voldemort unsuccessfuly tried to kill Harry, a bit of his soul went into Harry so Harry lets voldemort kill him but he doesn’t actually die for some reason and everyone thinks he is dead but he’s not and then he kills voldemort. haha too bad if you didn’t want to know the end people.

    also, Daniel will be about 40 by the time they finish filming HP so he’ll just be like a really old-looking school-aged kid.

  90. My brother dies in book 7. Then I go apeshit and kill like a million death eaters, shit is SO cash.

  91. In my experience, if knowing the ending ruins a book, then it’s a terrible book.

  92. what a cunt

  93. naaice, i was referencing a joke from the movie “Funny People”, which can be seen in the many various trailers of that movie floating around. I’m sorry you waste all that time to respond to my sarcasm.

  94. does she live in a box?

  95. #75– Don’t taint my name you cunt.

  96. hahhahhaha she just looses it and gets snarky. I love it.

  97. I bet Alyssa thinks strippers like her too.

  98. I’m afraid of Alyssa.

    I think when they celebrate easter in church and the priest talks about Jesus’ death she probably shouts something like “You asshole, I wanted to watch “The Passion”, and I haven’t finished the fucking bible yet. You fucking priest! You spoiled everything!”

  99. pms

  100. Wow…..that woman is nuts….someone quick! give her a Valium, or a Haldol!

  101. Harry Potter is srs business.
    Alyssa needs to stop being an illiterate bitch.



  104. This might be my favourite Lamebook ever.

    I love how she says she has a life, so is too busy to read. Then says she’s been at camp. Camp? That’s a busy life?

  105. I loved how Alyssa was all like “obviously your mind is easily manipulated if you can pass judgement and make assumptions that easily” when she was the the one who actually did it!
    silly little girl, contradicting herself.
    Guess thats what you get for reading harry potter.

  106. Sarah and Alyssa are both nuts!

  107. R. Weasley’s comment has to be my favorite on here. Besides everyone agreeing with me :P

  108. @Sophie. Ok, that’s funny.

  109. Dumbledore died?

  110. Roberto Rodriguez

    Voldemort killed Harry’s parents.

  111. when the final harry potter book came out, i was working as a waitress. people came into my resturant all day long with thier noses pushed into that book, and got annoyed when i tried to talk to them, and hogged my tables for hours because they couldnt order because they hadnt finished the chapter. it was so frustrating.

    so you know what i did? i went to borders and read the last few chapters of that book. and anyone with that book that was even the slightest bit rude to me? i told them exactly what happened.

    its a book people.

  112. hannah – that’s AWESOME. Love it.

  113. Hannah – That is so not awesome. I see you are not a big reader and have little empathy for other people. Encourage people to read, not the other way around. Some things are worth more than a few dollars in tips.

  114. Alyssa needs to get laid. NOW.

  115. ya rly

  116. OMG I actually know these people… That’s sad.

  117. Alyssa is so gay.

  118. 89 thank you, I watched the last movie is editing no longer in fashion?

  119. Oh I WISH I was friends with one of them, I would have written every spoiler from the last book. Would’ve been epic!

  120. Spoiler! Alyssa: Hermione and Ron get married! AND Harry and Ginny get married! I’m mad at the writter for giving away the movie in her book. Ruined it for me…

  121. wow alyssa loves harry potter enough to get that defensive about spoilers… yet she has never read the books?

  122. If you’re relying on the movies to tell the Harry Potter story then you deserve to have the story spoiled. The movies are a load of crap, pick up the damn books if you’re that interested.

  123. alyssa needs to calm the hell down.

  124. John Players Standard

    Man I trolled LOST so hard with my spoilers. Fucking great times.

  125. ahh I remember the happy day when the 6th Harry Potter book came out…someone bought it that day, read it over the weekend, and then printed out loads of signs saying SNAPE KILLS DUMBLEDORE and stuck them *everywhere* in our college…you would not believe how many 17/18 year olds had hissy fits that day :)

  126. Oh, Ross and Rachel ended up together. Sorry…

  127. DORKS

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