Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Picture This!

previous post: Time for Some Terrible Type

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50 Comments

  1. Me!

  2. Oh yeah, that cake looks like a fucking walrus made it.

  3. How would that ever have been a baseball bat?

  4. christopherlovet

    Looks moar like a deuce cake.

  5. I think I played on that baseball field in my nightmares as a child.

  6. That “baseball bat” looks more like a cock & balls-shaped turd. x_X

  7. are you sure that wasn’t just ‘field of dreams’, hobo? it must be – otherwise it’s simply unaccountable that an english person would dream about baseball. i’m concerned – perhaps i should put you forward for a citizenship test…

  8. I think we know what the “nice old lady” was missing in her life

  9. Brian Bleach, a big bat?

  10. That is a fabulous edible decorative rendition of a penis-shaped shit. I doubt I could make it so convincing even using REAL shit. Brilliant work!

  11. OMG yes! “A7X” does suck horribly! I worked at Spencer’s once, and I had to hear them about A7(hex) X a day! I always felt like beating someone to death with one of those stupid emo studded belts.

  12. also, w2g old lady!

    someone’s gotta put the peni on the birthday cakes

  13. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    Audio Penis.

  14. Pornography is not just disgusting but also addictive. I once had a student that was so obsessed with internet pornography that he was failing all his classes because he would stay at home and stare at women doing depraved things to each other (and to men as well) as opposed to studying.

    What’s worse is that pornography brainwashes men into thinking that every woman needs to be big breasted with nary a hair on her body who will engage in all sorts of acts of defilement at his command. Real women have hairs around their anus and vagina as well as around their nipples (sometimes). Unfortunately the liberal agenda of sexualizing everything, teaching children that 12 years should be wearing thongs and waxing their pubic hair, giving them free condoms and saying “it’s normal to do drugs have sex at 13, have fun and if you get pregnant the tax payers will pay for your crack addicted baby”

    “Do not lust in your heart after her beauty
    or let her captivate you with her eyes,
    for the prostitute reduces you to a loaf of bread,
    and the adulteress preys upon your very life
    Can a man scoop fire into his lap
    without his clothes being burned?
    Can a man walk on hot coals
    without his feet being scorched?” — Proverbs 6:25-8

  15. As long as it doesn’t stutter, it’s all OK Dukey!

  16. Reverend Redrum

    I like how that person had to clarify that the cake was for a 9 year old… Like if he was 11 or 12, big black shit cock is totally acceptable.

  17. Reverend Redrum

    P.S. I totally just cranked one out to dan_fargis’s comment. You dirty minx.

  18. What the Fargis!

  19. Can we “lamebook” the lamebook comments? Or will that just make the universe implode?

  20. Fargis just needs to watch more porn. Let it speak to you man!

  21. Good Lord, dan_fargis, you need to look at some porn to calm down!!!!

  22. Wow, Fargis, time to take the stick out. Calm the fuck down. I know you think that porn played backwards is a satanic recruiting booklet but in all seriousness the O’Riley Factor and conservative propaganda like it are just as self-masturbatory. Go blow a load on Limbaugh and kick a puppy, you’ll feel better.

  23. ‘Real women have hairs around their anus and vagina as well as around their nipples (sometimes).’

    -dan_fargis, 2010

  24. You do know that Dan Fargis is a troll? or am I ruining the fun?

  25. sometimes part of the humor in Lamebook is when you get to the end of a submission and it shows only the very last comment that someone made….and you read it and think to yourself “whoa! that comment seems totally out in left field…I wonder what led someone to say that”…

    Case in point: comment # 23. I lol’d…of course only Fargis could be behind this….

  26. dirtylittlepretty

    the audio penis looks more like an audio vibrator…not that takes away from the fun of it or anything..just saying.

    i still don’t like baseball…and ‘what the fargis’ is my favorite saying of the week..as of now.

  27. dirtylittlepretty

    *that, that*

  28. Haha, alordslums! That quote should be on his headstone! And what does he mean “sometimes?” How many sets of nipples has he seen? You’d think he’d have only seen one woman’s nipples and that they would either have hair or would not and that would be all he knows. The implication is that he has seen many sets of nipples…hmmm.

    Maybe Dan_Fargis is a gynocologist?

  29. LMAO, poor Dan. He takes it up the rear.

  30. I don’t care if the cake as a whole is a penis or a vagina. A cake is a cake. I’m going to eat and enjoy it.

  31. I would like to say a very good morning to all my female friends here on Lamebook, and that I love each and every one of you and your hairy anuses, ok.

  32. I heart dan_fargis.

  33. good grief, why didn’t they just wipe off the extra icing and quit yer bitchin!

  34. I think I would actually pee my pants if I walked into the office and saw post-its outting my co-worker’s porn habits.

  35. Ahhh, remember what I said about the Dick firework cake, saying it’s lucky it was for a teen and not a poor little kid – now this one IS for a poor kid. :(
    It kind of looks like it’s made of poo, too.
    Not funny, just sad, poor boy. :(

  36. Aside from the obvious on the cake, everything else on it sucks, too. What the hell that black squiggly thing is escapes me and I’m pretty sure it says ‘Bradin’; shouldn’t it say ‘Brandon’?

  37. I took the porn post its as a prank from his co-workers.

  38. I would like to read more from dan_fargis; I like the way he writes.

  39. CommentsAtLarge

    @grammar

    The black squiggily thing is the logo for the Chicago White Sox baseball team. Well, it’s supposed to be anyways.

    And what’s wrong with women doing depraved things to each other? It’s the cornerstone of the economy for California’s Sna Fernando Valley, porn capital of the world. Ol’ Farggy just hasn’t seen it done right… Word, EE? ;)

  40. How on earth does Mr Fargis know what women are doing to each other and to men (N.B. the men aren’t doing anything depraved)in porn? How would he know if they are hairless or hairy or busty or not? I presume it was the student who told him it was addictive?
    I think he may have had a sneaky-peek once or twice before…? Anyway, carry on Dan…we believe you. You’re a kak.

  41. Actually, Comments, he has. A lot of people were wondering where he was over the weekend, especially as there was a post right up his avenue. But he was exploring other avenues at the time…

    Click on me – and might I say, that’s how it was.

    Thanks, big boy.

  42. Maybe it is because my life is toast and kraft dinner, but that cake looks delish.

  43. Fargis is back!

  44. oh I cried.
    Will agree with Alords, the best line of the day is: ‘Real women have hairs around their anus and vagina as well as around their nipples (sometimes).’

    Oh god, it really is a knee slapper haw haw!
    It was the the first thing I zeroed in on in his statement. Just awesome.

    It’s Happy Hairy Nipple Day today! Have you played with your’s yet?

  45. Charlie Incognito

    Fargis, I know what you mean with that scooping hot coal into your lap thing. My loins are burning right now so I’ skipping all my classes to stay at home- I have a big day planned…

    I’m gonna bat to girl/girl, guy girl, midget skate porn, pee porn, German bratwurst blood sausage face slapping porn, historical re-enactment porn, necro-porn, people watching porn porn (metaporn), clown porn, cream pie porn, tentacle porn, blowup doll porn, humiliation porn, BDSM electro taser porn, Japanese pixellated hentai crying girl porn, but never, ever, not even at my “wackiest” would I go near hairy nipple porn.

    You sick fuck.

  46. Who the hell is dumb enough to walk on coals. That seems retarded. I would just fly over them. And fire in my lap? Well… that’s a really long story.

  47. “The prostitute reduces you to a loaf of bread.”

    I’m not a Christian so I really have no idea what they meant with this line. I’m not sure why there are so many references to Jesus and bread, but I’d still totally sit on his baguette. While I’d pass on the sourdough, he could pumper my nickel anytime.

  48. So am I not a real woman because I don’t have hair around my anus?

  49. I don’t get why Fargis thinks all men are obsessed with women shaving and waxing their crotch and butt. Most men are just happy to get some.

    But, what do I know? I’ve actually had sex.

  50. @dan_fargis
    OK, some more pseudo-righteous crap to shoot down.
    You, being totally against pornography would also, being such a good and righteous Christian be against adultery and sex before marriage? Correct? No. Somehow…
    Check out http://www.lamebook.com/2010/06/30/farmville-follies/
    specifically the part where dan says: “the only reason to lay a fat girl is if she’s a training lay. but even then….” So you’re sleeping with people to practice?

    Oh by the way, I didn’t really get to explain myself on the other posts I’ve ranted on about you. I’m just a bastard who hates it when hypocritical jerks go on and on and on about hell and how everyone is going to it and about how wrong everyone is and how holy they are, and never ever stop the stupidity. And yeah, I know that by setting up this vendetta against you I have sorta become a bit like you.

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