Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Picture Perfect

previous post: Sharing the Sex

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123 Comments

  1. @ #4: Um, no. Just… No.

  2. yuck!

  3. OH GOD WHY

  4. My cat had puppies too! Holy christ, are there really people that dumb?
    And #4, I am now blind. Thanks.

  5. Who would marry that? He must be just as yummy looking.

  6. Good god why would you post that picture? It wouldn’t even be so bad if she just cropped her nasty ass legs out of it! Number 2, white trash at its best…

  7. lol at the cute pupies

    All of these made me smile and then I scrolled to #4 – I mean everyone has problem areas on their bodies but COME ON!! No one else but your man should see that!

    What has been seen, cannot be unseen.

  8. ewww thighs =/

  9. Suzanne, you started out so well, but, by God, woman, it went pear-shaped.

  10. Wait….those aren’t puppies?

  11. @ Valenya haha I think not even your man should see this unless you’d like him to file for divorce soon :D D the only one that has to see that is a plastic surgeon and a treadmill!!

  12. Good for her for losing the weight but uugghh

  13. Why does her top half look 20 and her bottom half look 80?

  14. Holy shit there are some shallow bitches in here. Have fun being lonely.

    Looks like Suzanne lost a shit-load of weight recently. So I guess you people were probably making fun of her a year or two ago for being obese. I wonder what you guys look like. You sound fat.

  15. You ever get one of those ‘ugh i feel like shit’ days? Well by fuck i feel gorgeous now!

  16. Her shape is nice, but her thighs are hell. I’m not for picking women apart based on their looks, but I have no idea how a woman willingly posts such a horribly unflattering, not to mention personal, picture of herself on such a public forum. In what reality did that seem like a good idea? 5 martinis into her bachelorette party perhaps?

  17. Where does it say she lost weight? She has an excellent top half. She’s a classic pear – all her body fat is in those cellulite-filled thighs. A normal weight loss program would not work for her. Liposuction is her only hope.

    Oh, I’m very slim.

  18. #4 looks like she’s lost quite a bit of weight recently. Good for her! It’s not easy. Still should never have taken that fucking pic though. I was ok until I got to that pic then I was all “Jesus, Mary, and Joseph”!

  19. @ boomstick hehe you wish dear, im 170cm tall 52 kilos and no im not making fun of anyone i’m just saying people should take care of themselves and not tolerate looking like this, least of all it’s unhealthy. and no again, that’s not how you look after losing a lot of weight. but probably you’re the one looking like this trying to justify it. you sound compassionate ;)

  20. how hilarious, all the body commnets about Suzanne, but i’m sure nobody commenting here is a bodybuilder or a model.

    all women, all, 100%, have and get cellulite (cellulite is something a man doesn’t have to deal with, thanks to how his fat cells arrange themselves).

    and it’s very, very hard to deal with, either to reduce or get rid of. even hot celebrities have it. it does look like she’s lost weight at some point (due to the bagging of the skin, cellulite appears even on tight skin), but only heavy weight training and a clean diet can ever even begin to reverse that.

    nobody should be posting shots of their ass online anyway. yuck!

  21. One wonders if English is Saingang’s first language. If not then they could be forgiven for a mistake like that. If it is then they shouldn’t even be letting their cat get pregnant if they don’t even know what the resulting offspring are called…

  22. I looked very similar at 20 and I was quite healthy. I don’t think there is anything wrong with her. I just would not share that picture if I were her.

  23. Not all women have cellulite. A lot do, but not all.

    Ha. Got to love these bitchy forums. Get your claws out, girls.

  24. 100% of women have cellulite. we all have honeycomb shaped fat grids. that’s how it is. fact. science. you can not say otherwise. (well, you can, but that makes you wrong)

  25. My first thought in the last picture is that she recently lost a lot of weight and that is the result. I have seem some really weird body types before.. I saw a girl with really really big up body with really skinny legs. Some people have a really big lower body (butt) and a skinny waist.

    We are all made differently. The picture is gross, yeah, but at least she is proud and confident enough in her body to not care about what others think. Which is not something a lot of us can say.

  26. upper body*

  27. I am really tired… seen*

  28. dirtylittlepretty

    those panties aren’t even cute.
    also, cellulite isn’t sexy??

  29. what’s wrong with some people admitting that not everyone looks as bad as they do? it’s not shameful, mostly it’s a matter of genes, then nutrition and exercise..and no not everyone has fat girds…i apologise for what I’m about to say and I promise I mean no insult to anyone, but I smell alot of US Mcdonalds presence in here, and I see many nice firm ladies’ asses in the gym. everyone has a different body structure and all, so let’s stop with ‘all women have fat girds etc’. no offence

  30. Well it may be “fact. science.” that I have cellulite, but nowhere on my body does it look even similar to those legs. If it did I would NEVER post a picture of it on facebook. That’s innapropriate and gross, if you’re confident in your looks then why not show them off in a way that is flattering.
    The penis/tit cake one is dumb. It just looks like some girl having a bachelorette party and either she or one of her guests had to bring their kid; who’s not old enough to know the difference. It’s not jizzing or highly graphic, just a penis cake. Chillax.

  31. OH MY FUCKING GOD

  32. Squats, lots and lots and lots of squats. That and lunges. That there is like getting half of what you paid for, what a rip-off.

  33. Body type argument aside, it’s just not a flattering picture. It’s been said already but I’ll echo the sentiment, this is something that should have stayed private. If she were built like CIndy Crawford or the mom from What’s Eating Gilbert Grape, it wouldn’t matter – it should have been reserved for her fiance not facebook.

    Also, I get great amusement at the dick cake being chocolate frosted. Looks like someone enjoys her men like limos, big and black.

  34. It’s not offensive to say women have fat. Everyone has fat or we’d be dead. Now many many people have too much fat. Some people have too little. But if we didn’t have any, our bodies couldn’t function properly. The word fat isn’t a dirty word. Too much fat is a different story than saying some fat. Fat is natural, it’s part of our biological make up, and I for one, enjoy being alive.

    Now, not every woman’s thighs look like that. Some look smooth and perfect. I worked hard and never managed that look. These days to be frank I have different priorities. My health is important as are my looks, but I have reasonable expectations about my personal limitations. I wasn’t made to look like a woman in a magazine. And most of the women in the magazines weren’t either, hence all of the photoshopping.

  35. I’m not worried about the cakes. All that little girl sees is chocolate, lol. That alone wouldn’t concern me. I’d be concerned about the atmosphere and possible excessive drinking at the party though. But you can’t tell much from the photo.

  36. dirtylittlepretty

    did I mention that Jess <3 's black cock?

  37. My dog had a bunch of kittens a couple of years ago?
    And… bachelorette? I wonder why…

    Lick me.

  38. HA @ curlybap! I was just thinking the same thing.

    Even though I credit her for losing weight (or whatever happened there), there is really no reason for ANYone to post a photo of themselves in their underwear on Facebook. And under the circumstances…I can’t even understand why she thought it was a good idea.

  39. I’m not sure why so many assume that Ms Needs A Referral To A Good Plastic Surgeon has probably recently lost weight. She hasn’t. It is her (very) unfortunate genetic shape.

    Those panties are some major fucking ugly, too.

  40. I’m not judging her for her leg…er…problems. I’m judging her for posting a picture of her butt, and ugly underwear, on Facebook. This is exactly why your password should be something too complicated to remember when you’re drunk.

  41. Yeah, her arms are way too firm to be in the “recently lost a bunch of weight” category. Learn the “crop” tool on your photo editor. And utilize it.

    Perhaps the panties are stating her eternal bachelorette status now that she’s shared her hideous thighs with every man on her friend list.

  42. 100% of women get cellulite do they? That’s a new one to me. I guess I along with several other of my lady friends, are defying the odds. Regardless gratuitous panty shots are lame, whether you look good in them or not.

  43. @ wordpervert i agree with you 100% your body looks different after losing weight, you’ve got rather saggy skin and loads of those streaky lines(i’m not sure how they’re called) this one has cellulite and bumps.

  44. You can call them whatever you want, those ‘pupies’ are fucking adorable.

  45. Also, after consulting google I haven’t found a single source of evidence saying that 100% of women get cellulite. Looks like the avergae number is 90%. Still, you can suck it Alex.

  46. *average

  47. Holy shit everyone, chill. So some chick posted an unflattering picture. Don’t get all your bachelorette panties in a knot.

  48. @14. I totally agree with boomstick. It looks like Suzanne has lost loads of weight recently. I would guess that maybe she has for her wedding. Some of the people that post comments on this website would be so quick to judge if she was overweight. If it’s true that she has lost weight, we should be congratulating her. I would never post a picture of myself in my underwear on Facebook but c’mon, she’s getting married. Some people here should stop being so damn judgemental.

  49. Banahm, I’m defying the odds, too.

    And, because I’m a total bitch, I’m betting that cellulite goes down past her knees, as well. I know someone who has a very similar shape to Suzy. Slim up top, and then, yowser, cellulite from ass-to-ankles. It’s hideous. She’s got cankles, too. Mother Nature was very unkind.

    polsvoice, it’s a girl thing.

    underthesea, standing in judgement is what we do best here on LB. You know that.

  50. fap fap fap fap fap fap

  51. Hmm, I suppose I was being judgemental about the people on Lamebook, wasn’t I? Pot – kettle – black! Apologies.

  52. Haha. I gave in a googled it. I now feel very informed about cellulite. Nothing saying 100% of women have cellulite. However the vast majority of people who have cellulite are women. I’d like to say I defy the odds, but it is what it is. I love myself these days, but I’ll refrain from posting pics of my ass on facebook. :-P

    And we are all here to judge. Isn’t that was Lamebook is for?

  53. FWIW, even at my heaviest my cellulite stopped at the knees. I have lovely calves.

  54. Dear god. Please don’t let my legs get like that. Please.

    however, I really like her subtle move of pushing her waist fat down with her hands so she appears to be thinner. Well done, Suzanne.

  55. I love myself too. Of course, it’s tough love.

  56. she probably looks great in jeans!!!

  57. No, she wouldn’t.

  58. My initial comment was going to be about how I don’t want to see breastfeeding during my lunch break- whether it’s human or cat- but alex and boomstick’s comments caught my attention:

    Maybe all women have the potential to get cellulite, but not all of them have it noticeably. I’m sorry for that girl in that picture, but I think with the help of a doctor and fitness trainer she can fix her thighs. My sister is a model btw, alex, and I’m a former model so does that mean I have the right to comment? I gained a few pounds in my first few months in the States, and I took strong measures to lose it and keep it off: exercise and healthy eating!

    I’m very strict about what I eat; you are what you eat and that girl is Mc Donald’s! Stop making excuses for her.

  59. wooow.. I’m twice the size of bachelorette if not more, and nowhere on my body looks THAT f-ed up. If it did, I sure as HELL would not be showing it to anyone. And I can def. see her ass crack through those ugly underwear. So thanks for that nightmare

  60. word, a little bit of ass is sexy, she probably would look in jeans, but she should steer clear of Victoria’s Secret!

  61. *good

  62. They really should have put Suzanne’s picture on it’s own thread.

    Compared to that, the picture with the girl puking in the bathroom is child’s play.

  63. Saff, yeah, a bit of ass is sexy, but, those thighs… Mother of God… those horrendous thighs…

    Suzy, I know an excellent plastic surgeon. I can hook you up.

  64. I suspect she’d look pretty good in the right kind of jeans. What’s showing in that picture would not show in jeans. A person can be far from perfect and still look good in a variety of clothing.

    I have no idea how she eats. I was bulimic and worked out in my late teens and still has cellulite. And now that I’ve done my research I can tell you that cellulite appears all over the world and is not only on overweight women. I need to find another way to amuse myself.

  65. The album title does say discretion advised though. So if any of her facebook friends looked through the album and were horrified by that picture it is their own fault. Maybe that was Suzanne’s reasoning for posting it on facebook. I still wouldn’t post undies pictures on facebook, but that’s just me.

  66. The discretion really should happen at the “should I post this picture on the internet” stage. Especially when things like Lamebook exist.

  67. Yes, the ass-shot is awful and should have been kept OUT of the FB feed, but damn, are none of you going comment on the mess in the background?!

    For fucks sake, how long have those boxes of shit been sitting on that dirty pink carpet?! For the love of jeebus, there are VHS tapes sitting there! Those panties are terrible, and everything in the shot just looks a a mess.

    Why is that picture? Why!?

  68. @ Ms Buzz – yeah that photo has taken on a life of its own!

  69. I agree that the photo is not for facebook, but you have to admire her positive body image! Her fiance is going to have a good time on their honeymoon ;)

  70. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    She did say discretion is advised. I say that on my Facebook too because of all the cock shots in my profile pics

  71. Aside from the body issue, why is everyone so offended that she posted a pic of herself in underwear? What if she said, “look at my new swimsuit”? No one says anything wen someone post pics in their bikini.

  72. I’ve actually decided that she’s 84 years old and now I’m going to applaud the old lady for her undie baring self-assuredness and her trim arms, even if her legs show her age.

  73. On the same note: Why do people make such a big deal when I do my grocery shopping in my underwear? I mean really. All my private parts are covered. Sheesh.

  74. She also looks like she’s probably an older woman. We can’t really expect people to look perfect when they’re old. Age is very cruel, to EVERYONE’s bodies.

  75. Age has been very kind to my body. Beer, Valium, Jim Bean, cocaine, 13 kids, and prostitution – that’s what was cruel to it.

  76. Bahaha you win, Douchetastic.

  77. Douchetastic, you really are an ass-half-full kind of person, aren’t you? ;)

  78. Yeah, about #4… I have some gratuitous butt shots in my bikini on facebook, and they look pretty damn cute. Tight gluts, smooth legs. I know my strengths. I wouldn’t take a picture of my most flawed body part and plaster it online.

    (Luckily I have no flaws.)

  79. She’s not old.

  80. Again, just… No. I am a woman with what probably qualifies as a body far more hideous than hers, which is precisely why I don’t put pictures of myself in my (hideous) underoos on facebook for all the world to see. I’m not chastising her for her body – God knows the universe is simply not evenhanded in the distribution of body fat (between and within bodies, apparently). No, I’m judging her for her ridiculously terrible decision to post that picture of those thighs on the internet, where malicious “friends” are free to submit it to lamebook for further scrutiny (and scarring). Just… No!

  81. … if you concentrate on just below the panties, it looks like a frowning alien… or a walrus eating, not sure.

  82. dasher11, I have a few gratuitous shots in my FB collection, too. Not for all to see – just my special friends.

    Like you, I have no flaws, and to reflect that I’m considering changing my screen name to wordperfect.

  83. Saingang: I’m going to stab you
    ENOUGH WITH THE GOD DAMN PENIS CAKES….FUCK!!
    3 needs to be put in background checks.
    Suzanne, you and your flabby, wrinkled old ass need a stabbing as well. Come ‘ere. Keke’s got a nice knife for ya.

  84. Whoa whoa whoa, let’s not kill people now.. Look at the kitties. Aren’t they cute? Oh sorry, I mean puppies. Look at the puppies.

  85. *pupies. And they are adorable.

  86. Ah yes, that’s right. “Pupies.”

  87. Those are some really cute pupies… and I was already planning on hitting the gym after work but thanks for the extra motivation Suzanne

  88. Dasher11 + Pervert: Can I be a special friend?

    Alex: 6’4″, 175 lbs. I play outside wing for Rugby. As you suck it, you can admire the 6 pack I spent last year getting.

  89. Wordy – nah, keep the perv in tact and wear it like a badge of honor. Besides, Corel might come after you for copyright infringement.

    Btw, you’ve got mail.

  90. I submitted the Suzanne pic. She’s 29.

  91. Suzanne has made me have a positive body image! Thanks!

  92. @rubygirl Did she just lose a crapload of weight?

  93. MY EYES! MY EYES! MY EYES! Let my blind friend know that he can have them any time he wants

  94. She had a gastric bypass a few years ago, I believe.

  95. I say this when I .. ME am NOT thin or anything of the sort.. who in the bloody hell posts that mess of themselves!! Cute undies yes but hot da*m! I think my eyes are bleeding. I’m gross waist down. Know what I do… I don’t take pictures of myself in my undies and post them on FB so lamebook can then post them. So yea put that in your pipe and smoke it.

  96. Ewwwwwwwwwww, she’s too old to be a bachelorette. >.<

  97. I have a very hard time believing she had gastric bypass unless she also had skin tightening around the torso and arms, and then why wouldn’t she do something about her legs, too? The skin on her torso is not indicative of gastric bypass at all.

  98. I have a girlfriend who had gastric bypass last year, and her thighs look the same. the weight loss is so fast, the skin takes a long time to catch up. and..props to her to have the confidence in her new body to show it off. that is totally NOT cellulite…it’s loose, loose skin. also..all you can see is her FOREARMS. those get worked most often, and would tighten faster. as well..she’s leaning forward. you can see where the back boobs were, and the belly skin would be in front, obviously. if you look really close, you can see at her elbow the little lip out..not what a thin arm would show. if she doesn’t work out, then the skin will take a longer time to tighten. maybe she uses her arms more than her legs. but..totally gastric bypass. I see my friend naked alll the time, and that’s what it looks like.

  99. By the way Alex, you may feel better by saying 100% of women get cellulite, but you are wrong. I am 100% cellulite free, and so is my mother, so unless I gain some serious weight (again, not in my genes) I will continue to be cellulite free for the rest of my life.
    Eat your heart out, hater.

  100. I have an 18-inch penis. It’s the biggest penis in the world. All the ladies tell me they love my penis more than anyone else’s. My dick is perfect.

    Oh sorry, I wanted to join the fun and brag about something that’s so obviously not true to cover up how unbearably insecure I am.

    I jerk off to pictures of myself.

  101. Sweet, we have another brag troll.
    Well, the weight loss surgery clears everything up for me. No offense to her, good that she took a step towards better health, but I think I’m doing mine the traditional way. It makes you have much less flab and drag, if any to do it slower.

    Sorry about earlier. It was a severe mood swing. However I still stand firm when I say I am sick of penis cakes lately. You’re going to not make me want to ever see one again, and go lesbian. “enough with the cocks, baby I want your hole being”

  102. I wish everyone would stop saying they are cellulite free …. please :S

  103. Cellulite – Just because you can’t putt a golf ball into it dosent mean it’s not there!

  104. Jeez the reason there’s a Lamebook is so we can come on here and mock/laugh at all the dumb/funny posts and pictures. All you PC holier than thou people who have posted about self esteem blah blah and every woman has cellulite blah blah can piss off. We came here to judge in peace!

  105. Agreed.

  106. #97 Douchetastic, I agree with you 100%. Also, hello, I see no stretch marks indicative of huge weight fluctuations either. Suzy is genetically predisposed to being exactly this shape. She is a pear. That is my final, bitchy, judgemental opinion.

  107. I have no idea why people are saying that #4 has recently lost a lot of weight. In the past year I have lost around 20kg (I dont know what that is in pounds) and my legs do not look like that. I lost weight properly, going to the gym and then walking 5 days a week. Maybe if you lost weight on a fad diet or something you might look like that, but I doubt it. To be fair, Im only 21 so maybe my body adapts better to change, but she just looks strange. If she had have lost a lot of weight, maybe she would be justified in posting those pics as she would be proud of herself for reaching her target. But really it just seems like she is an old lady who should know better then to post private pictures like that online.

  108. MissBea is now Frodo. Go back to your pool, “hater.”

    I agree with word. There are no stretch marks, and she’s older than 29 as ruby said ^ Sorry…but 29 is still fairly young, shouldn’t her body still have a somewhat easier time if she was 29? Bloody hell, I don’t whether to make heads or tails of this.

  109. I too have a pear shaped body and curse it. Good news is, I went to the doctor yesterday and talked about my goal weight and dieting. They said I’m doing everything right and my goal weight is in fact 135! Apparently I’m medium boned instead of small boned. Which means I don’t have to be 85-120 max. She said that would be just as bad on my heart to be underweight than to be obese. Go me!

    I made a bad joke with my bf and said “Insecurity time, does that mean my bones are fat >_> and I have to lose marrow for them to be small? Or maybe just not consume any calcium and vitamin D?” Alright, boo me off stage with rotten tomatoes and fruit.

  110. Just for the record I would fuck all the females in the above photos…even that pussy in the first one.

  111. Bestiality? Imamofo, you know that the first one is really my in a cat costume, right? Silly boy, fur is for kids.

  112. For everyone arguing with Alex, it’s not that 100% of women get cellulite; it’s that 100% of women can get cellulite because, it’s true, the fibers in our thighs are arranged in a criss-cross pattern creating pockets of fat. If you don’t get too much fat, then it won’t push through and it won’t show up as cellulite. If you do get too much fat (and you don’t need a whole bunch for it to be “too much”), then it will appear as cellulite. No need to get so defensive that someone suggested you might one day get cellulite.

    Also, I wish that woman hadn’t posted that picture. :( But good for her for having body confidence, I guess…? But I’m still sorry I had to look at it. And she’s trash anyway for posting a picture of her panty-clad ass.

  113. me** Oh great, another day of me not double checking everything before hitting enter.

  114. Cellulite sucks. It’s all in your DNA. Skinny girls get it, some larger girls are smooth, I’ve seen it over and over. It’s not true that you can’t get rid of it. Lipo can make it worse so that’s not the way, but you can always tone and cut out toxins to make it better. My friend gives up fizzy drinks for two weeks and sees an improvement. Bad cellulite runs in my family – lucky me! – but when I’m fit and toned it does go away, it only comes with the fat in my case. I think it’s a very individual thing and for those women in their 40s who are toned right up to their butts without doing anything, you are so lucky.

    As for the woman in the photo, ack! The top of her body is in its 20s and the bottom is the grandmother of it. I’ll bet her stomach matches the thighs, though. Elasticity is also in the DNA as well as being affected by lifestyle.

  115. Sear, congrats on the weight loss and all, but 20kg in a year wouldn’t cause anyone to look like that.

    If this woman really did lose a lot of weight it’s probably in the 60 – 80 kg range.

    In other news, why does it matter what one looks like in order to share their opinion about someone else? If I was a supermodel it would then be okay to say it’s gross and unattractive? I’m not, but I’m not huge either, and if I did look like that I’d call myself gross and unattractive. You can’t change what you like and don’t.

  116. Keona, I promise you… she is 29.

  117. Hey, it’s just my opinion. That’s all, no harm done. I reserve that for my slags on here.

  118. Questioning the looks of someone who judges someone else’s looks on the internet is just one of those internet cliches, like comparing people to Hitler. It’s a way of saying “I disagree with you” that people would not use to someone’s face. If I disagree with you on the internet then therefore I must be fat, have no life outside of being on a computer, eat Cheetos, live in a basement owned by my parents, etc.

  119. Pic #4: Goodbye boner.

  120. TylerDurdenUMD, who comes to this site with a boner in the first place??

  121. I’m fat with some thick thighs and I’m pretty sure my legs look better than that. Like that one person said, her bottom half looks 80.

  122. omg, why would you post that pic of yourself? Thats just embarassing…

  123. I’m so saying this: D’awwww! Kitties!!! SOOO cute!!! :) :)

    And now when that’s out the way, oh dear LORD those legs on the last one! And why would you post half-naked pictures of yourself anyway? Oh yeah, the attention whore -syndrome. Sorry, my bad.

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