Wednesday, November 3, 2010

PEDOling Backwards

previous post: Mom Makes It Better



  1. didn’t get the last one

    the one with ‘pedophile wanted’ was extremely not funny


  3. 1 – good LB material
    2 –
    3 – a man taking his daughter on a ride. don’t tell me there aren’t better pedophile pictures on fb than this.

  4. wtf, pedphile my ass.
    i dated a 18 year old when i was 14.
    Usa has the stupidest laws.

  5. I would love to know what age William is since his friends are all cracking up over it.

    #3 – Such a shame that dads have to worry now when they do something completely innocent with their children.

  6. I don’t think William would be missing out terribly if those people deleted him off facebook.

  7. What does ‘hold thumbs for me’ mean?
    That’s the most interesting part of #2

  8. Am eagerly anticipating Soup and Imamofo’s contributions.

    @ curlybap – It’s just the way he is looking at the kids and he has his hands up (in a ‘surrender to the cops’ stylee), proof that he is GUILTY, cut off his balls and piss in his eyes. Burrrrrrrnnn him.

  9. Accusing innocent people of paedophilia, hilarious! It’s never ruined anyone’s life, all just a good bit of fun.

    Why is the 3rd one still on this site?

  10. Haha yeah so can’t wait for those. Imamofo never fails to shock. In a good way lol.

    Well at least with his hands up he’s not touching the kids!

  11. #4 it’s not just the US… also I doubt William is a teenager himself the way his friends are so disgusted, it must be one of those pretty noticable age gaps. I wish they didn’t all have average names so I could get an update ;)

  12. … and the third one is sweet, the submitter is deranged.

  13. @ladyrisk-
    In Austria people “hold their thumbs” (putting your thumb in between your index and middle fingers) for luck, instead of crossing their fingers. My Austrian boss taught me that… She never got the crossing fingers thing.

  14. #3 should just be removed. I ride with my children on carnival rides all the time.

  15. Is the 1st one from Britain? We have a legal age of 16…don’t know where else does. It does sound like William might be at least in his 20′s the way his ‘friends’ are reacting. Otherwise, it’s a bit overreacting. There were loads of girls in my high school who’d be going out with guys like 4 years older than them, even when they weren’t legal. Usually because they mature first so go for the older guys.
    @heyhey, it’s not exactly a stupid law is it, because that age gap might not be much, but if 14 was the legal age what’s to stop a 60 year old going after that 14 year old. There’s a good reason for those laws. Although the statutory rape thing I always have doubts about if that’s what you meant…

  16. TheDon: New Zealand also has a legal age of 16. Possibly Australia too.

    At least they’re not from Mexico… age of consent there is 12, from what I hear.

  17. The only thing wrong with the last one is that the heaviest people are supposed to go in the middle on that ride to avoid snapping the chair base. Beyond that, wtf? That poor guy is now under a pedophile category. It should be removed.

  18. My guess would be that William is around the age of Prince William, because royal births usually make the name the child gets really popular around that time. Just a guess, tho. Hope not!

  19. Number three pisses me off.. As if there aren’t enough deadbeat dads in the world.. So when I guy takes his kids on a ride he’s automatically a pedo and not a cool dad. F*cking the person who submitted this: just because your parents don’t love you doesnt change the fact that there are loving parents out there. It’s nobodies fault but yours that your parents wish they would have been pro choice.

  20. What’s wrong with the dad?? Take this picture down! That is seriously taking it too far. You can’t go around calling people Peodo for no good reason.

    I always have fun pointing fingers at people, who ask for it, but this is seriously below standard.

  21. OMG maybe if we all shout ‘Pedo’ loud enough and point enough fingers then everyone can forget about how the urge to ‘procreate with’ (fcuk) pretty much anything exists inside every one of us mammals- regardless of age, gender, consent etc.

    Can’t we be grown-up enough to say ‘maybe a part of being human involves unsavoury urges, but as a species we’ve developed enough to say no to them?’. Then again, once you go down that road I guess you gotta start dispelling fairy tales about God and Jesus too so maybe the finger pointing/name calling is the way to go after all… talk to your local Priest for more on this topic.

  22. A picture of a van with tinted windows and “FREE CANDY” written on the side: acceptable for a pedo post.

    A picture of a dad accompanying his very young daughter on what is possibly her first amusement park ride: completely unacceptable for a pedo post.

    Seriously, what the hell? Would this picture have been posted if it was a mother? Whoever submitted this is either a moron or an asshole, and whoever actually reviewed it, thought it was funny, and posted it on this site is a fuckwad.

  23. heyhey, I’m sorry you dated a pedophile.

    kyachan and the don, the age of consent here is set by state. In a couple of states it’s as low as 15. In most states it’s 16, 17, or 18, with allowances for if you’re over the limit and the younger partner is below the limit but the age difference is less than like 2 years (so like a 19- and 17-year-old can date in an age 18 state even though one is below the limit). I explained that poorly.

    I’ll add my name to the petition to remove the third photo. Not nice. If it’s funny at all, it’s because he’s kind of a portly guy on a tiny ride and it looks like he’s about to bust the bar open, but it definitely doesn’t belong in the pedo category. Not nice. It might have been his little girl’s first roller coaster and she was scared to go by herself. She’s clearly the youngest of all the kids on there.

  24. #18 AnyaP, William is currently in the top 10 baby names in the US and has been for decades.

  25. I actually created an account just so that I could ask, “What the hell is wrong with people that: 1) they would submit this photo as though there’s something wrong with a dad taking his kids to an amusement park? and 2) it was posted on here by someone who apparently agreed with that assessment?”

    At least two seriously disturbed individuals…

  26. @ #s 14, 17, 19, 20, 22, 23, etc… AMEN! wtf were the editors thinking. the pic is neither lame nor funny, it’s someone riding with his (from the looks of it) three-year-old.

  27. I have to jump on the bandwagon here, and call out LB ass-hattery on posting the pic of what is probably a dad on a carnival ride with his kid. Some might think a dad on a kid’s ride is lame, but it’s not pedo.

    There doesn’t appear to be anything perverse in the pic, and you folks running this site are being complete fucking assholes by making a pretty horrific assumption that there is. Take it down!

    Not sure what kind of info the submitter included, but did you even consider that if he isn’t the dad he may be mentally handicapped?! Some years ago at a kids park with a 5 yr old, we ended up also accompanying a 6′ 3″ man with the mentality of a very small child on a ride like this, along with our kid. The man’s elderly mother was too frail, and he desperately wanted to ride. It happens.

  28. hitmewithyourrhythmvic

    Blimey, seriousness on Lamebook? I’ll got with what everyone says though – I’d be spitting blood if I took my kid to the fairground and someone called me a paedophile. Although, maybe they just took the word ‘paedophile’ to mean just it’s basic Latin translation – ‘child lover’.

    Whatevs, remove!!

  29. It’s attitudes like those of whoever submitted #3 that has my husband very wary of how he behaves around other children when he takes our young toddler to the park or swimming alone. It’s very unfair.

  30. Miss Shegas, it’s possible that he is mentally handicapped. Or that he’s a huge pansy like me, because this is probably the most extreme ride I’d go on at the fair!

  31. idontknow thanks for pointing that out to #18, his/her comment really pissed me off. The sheer ignorance of it- Nobody above the age of 28 and below say 21 is named William.

  32. 1. Eeeewwwwww….no…not okay…bravo friends for calling his pedo ass out…shit I don’t even think 14-year-olds should date 14-year-olds…seriously, they’re still awkward at that age…
    2. Laaaame boring blah.
    3. Soooo, all the pics of my dad taking my sister and I on rides=pedo? Fucking super. Goddamn it, there goes part of MY childhood.

  33. Lamebook is stupid for publishing the last one.

    Lamebook is Frodo for publishing the second one.

  34. @Miss Shegas, true, you know, I didn’t think about that, and it is STILL douchey if the man is mentally handicapped.
    I maintain, fuuuuck you whoever submitted it. The man does NOT have his hands down anyones pants, including his own. Take this shit down Lamebook. And do me a favor, email the submitter and call them a fucktard for me. Thanks.

  35. The last photo is in Alton Towers in England, I spent last weekend there and saw plenty of parents doing this with their kids. The fact that Lamebook even THOUGHT of including this submission disgusts me.

    Take it down, it’s slander and it’s capable of hurting the individuals involved.

  36. I think Lamebook needs to return any income they get for anyone clicking on the adverts for the whole of today.

    For a site that prides itself on being clever and funny (quite often in a slightly condescending and patronising manor), you’ve really fucked up here.

    At least the little girl looks like she’s enjoying what may be her first fairground ride.

  37. So we know at least one person who runs the site is here, because we got a new post. However, the picture remains.

    Fuck you, Lamebook. Hiding your own pedophile instincts by pointing the fingers at others?

  38. @curlybap – Ditto. Hubbie is a JK teacher, so double the wariness. Even with with his experience and double police checks and disclosures – when he worked with infants and toddlers – he sometimes wasn’t allowed to change diapers and such. In one daycare? They employed him, but said “don’t lay a finger on a kid” … one day, a kid was about to fall from a chair, so DH caught him. He was fired.

    So yah, I created an account just to join the long list of people saying “Take down the feckin’ photo!!!”

    Jeebus wept. I have lurked for the best part of a year and I’ve sat quietly re: fat-gate, baby-gate, wotever-gate – but this is ridiculous.

  39. Being in a relationship does not mean you’re having sex.

    2 and 3 are just stupid.

    This is one of the most stupidest posts in Lamebook.

  40. I see you took it down as I was posting. Thank you.

  41. oh i agree about #1 who says they’re having sex? i just got sidetracked with number 3 and forgot lol. I see the photo is gone now. good job guys.

  42. My dad is disabled, and my mother is a pansy, so if I ever wanted to ride something at a theme park, I either had to go alone or hope that we brought an aunt or uncle along. I would have loved to be able to experience riding a roller coaster with my family, but I guess if they were just going to be called pedophiles, then thank God for severe nerve damage, huh? Lamebook, you’re a bunch of twats.

  43. First of all, I believe in free speech and a censorship free world, so I’m not going to demand that you take it down, but I am going to beg.

    As a very large father of a very young daughter, I would be very offended to be called a pedophile and have pictures of me put up on the internet, potentially damaging my reputation and future encounters with women or jobs i’d like. I take my daughter on rides all the time, and like this man is doing, I watch her to see if she’s enjoying herself. I just hope no one ever takes a picture of me and thinks I’m a creep. This picture’s classification is horrible. Please take it down, or at least put it in a new category called “fatties doing things they shouldn’t” and mock it based on the fact that he definitely shouldn’t be on the end seat of a small kid’s ride, especially at his weight.

    If you refuse, you’re a bunch of assholes.

  44. Thank you for taking it down LB.

  45. Thanks for taking it down, but it was still douchey and not okay.

  46. Damn, that’s what I get for writing a long comment. It gets taken down right as I’m writing it. Thanks for showing some respect for single fathers.

  47. @jesuschristisgay Not even just single fathers, but anyone even with a Dad who gave a shit or took them on rides much like my dad did. It was just pretty fucked in general and I was offended =…as was pretty much everyone else here actually haha. I still want them to email the person who submitted it and call them a fuckwad for me.

  48. @blondebimbo Agreed. I can only imagine how soon someone will think I’m a pedophile if I have to bring my daughter into the men’s room to use the bathroom while out in public. Or at what age people will think it’s creepy when I pick her up by her crotch. It makes me nervous to live in a world where I will be constantly judged as a man.

    If Lamebook doesn’t feel up to it, I’ll email the person and call him a fuckward. Lamebook, please forward me the contact info.

  49. @jesuschristisgay, I’ll cosign that e-mail with you.

  50. @jesuschristisgay ………uhm… it does not matter how old your child is, you should NEVER pick it up by the CROTCH wtf is wrong with you!?

  51. Ha!

  52. My sentiments exactly, by the way.

  53. @saucedpoet you obviously have never had a child, but i’ll just go ahead and assume that when you do you expect that every single time that child wants to be picked up you will have two hands free and the ability to lift them from their sides/armpits area. when you have a child and realize that sometimes they need to be picked up when you have only one hand free, this is a convenient and practical option. you’re an idiot

  54. I was on board until the picking up by the crotch thing…

  55. The #48 comment belongs up on the post.

  56. I don’t have a kid, but I have a little niece. When I need to use only one arm to pick her up, I bend down and put my arm around her back, lift her up to my hip and let her sit there. It’s just that when you say pick her up by the crotch, it sounds like you’re grabbing her by the crotch and dangling her upside down or something. Maybe with different descriptors we’d all understand.

  57. #1 My opinion would depend on the age of William. If someone my age was dating a 14 yr old I’d be beyond disgusted. If their 18 yr old son was though, it’d be a big fat meh. Especially if they were both in high school. I’m assuming he’s older. If he’s out of high school his new girl friend should be also.

    #2 *yawn*

    #3 I’m with the people who are appalled that this picture is even up here. I have 3 (going on 4) little girls who are fortunate to have an active, loving father. It’s sad to think he can’t go out and be a parent with them without people labeling him as a pedophile.

    As for picking up children. I don’t think there has been a way I haven’t picked up a child when in a pinch. The worst way is by one arm. I usually just grab around under the arms with one arm. But sometimes squirmy toddlers require a grip that prevents them from wriggling down your hip.

  58. Oh, the last picture is gone. I’m a bit slow on the uptake today, as usual.

  59. I was trying to make a point, which was not to judge fathers even when something that ‘seems’ weird isn’t. Which includes picking them up in various ways. Since some simpletons in here without kids don’t understand, I’ll explain. When you hold a child with one arm, they usually are sitting right about on your hip. Usually, your arm is partially on their back, but your hand is supporting their butt to make sure they don’t fall. If you want to pick them up easily and get them into that seated arrangement on your hip, you can crouch down next to them and grab them under the butt and pull them toward your hip. Does it sound gross when described, if you’re immature yes. When you have a child, you’ll understand.

  60. Just to unnecessarily clarify something that no one cares about… Every cursed time I have had to ride that kind of ride with my kids, the far seat is the one they point adults to. I don’t know the physics behind it, or if the Carneys Union 65 got together and decided that was the best way to embarrass tall people like myself, but that man was most likely told to sit there.

    My guess is that the person who submitted the picture didn’t say, “Hey, LB, put these with the kid-molester pics!” they probably thought the man looks silly (which he does) and LB made the call.

  61. I understand the “picking up by the crotch” description and it’s something many parents do, especially when the child is younger and can’t position themselves easily on the hip. It’s not literally grabbing their crotch.

  62. The person who submitted the picture would’ve had nothing to do with how LB used the picture. It was LB’s decision to post it in this context. So to talk about emailing the submitter is ridiculous.

  63. While I agree that the last pic was grossly misrepresented, I’m worried that it was called to be taken down in a world of free speech and media. Why not just create a different category for it rather than remove it all together?

  64. Isn’t it free speech to take it down and choose to not post it elsewhere? Unless I missed a post, no one threatened legal action against Lamebook, we exercised our own right to free speech in stating how stupid it was to have it up in the first place. Nothing to worry about.

  65. I personally contacted Lamebook and informed them that if they did not remove the photo that I would be turning them into the Cyber Police. They take these things very seriously, ya know.

    In all sincerity. Freedom of speech has to do with what the government can regulate. If an indivual or company posts something that offends it’s readers then there is nothing illegal or wrong with listening to the reader’s opinions and taking them into account. It does not stifle their right to free speech.

  66. @ jesus I’m with Douchetastic – I understand what you mean too. Don’t worry about it.

  67. @heyhey I agree, fucking a USA and our laws.

    I know this is late, but I agree with some others. Being in a relationship does not mean you’re having sex for sure. x.x
    My first bf was age 16, he was 15. We were still together when I turned 18, and him 17. We got really scared, and I kept getting told to break it off or stop having sex..but we didn’t. Risky, sure, but what were the chances of being caught?

    It’s not like the cops know every relationship/ ages and watch like hawks…they have better ways to spend time, and that also would be obsessive.

    The second post would have been funnier if it was William again and not Stephen, what with Hannes’ comment and all.

  68. I didn’t see the picture, but with rides that go around corners a lot the heavier person is supposed to sit on the outside so that they don’t crush the smaller person when they’re going round. (If that clears anything up)

  69. Keona, in most parts of the USA, an 18 year old can yiff with a 17 year old without fear of legal reprisal. Generally, if the age difference is small (the exact difference depending on the state), then it is legal.

    Also, I have to say that some 14 year olds are mature enough to handle a sexual relationship. And most are physically mature; being attracted to a 14 year old girl is not pedophilia in the sense of liking non-postpubescent individuals.

  70. @JC, why are we “simpletons” just because we don’t have kids? You described this in a super-awkward way, and your way really doesn’t even make sense, especially since when you describe the exact hold you’re talking about, the crotch isn’t even mentioned. No one was attacking you, just trying to understand what the hell you were talking about. You didn’t have to be an asshole about it. Grow a sense of humor or go elsewhere.

  71. Saffer, free speech only goes so far. As someone pointed out, it really only applies to the government legally. The rest is just in principle. Also, free speech does not protect labelling someone a pedophile with zero proof.

  72. pterryndactyl, it was not one of those rides. It was the jumper one that’s a row of 5 or 6 seats that jumps up and down the pole. The heaviest people are supposed to be in the middle so the pole supports their weight rather than the seat base supporting it. In the picture, the heaviest and tallest people were on the outside while the smallest were in the middle.

    Especially when you have an adult significantly heavier than any of the children on the ride, putting him/her on the outside isn’t safe.

    However, none of that was the riders’ faults, it was the fault of the ride operator.

  73. william needs to go up a lil bit on the age i like dating girls younger than me because it makes dating easier but in order to avoid the same fate as my old cross country coach.
    1. dont ever have sex with anyone under 18 EVER
    2. if you are anywhere from 13 to 17 years of age you can date anyone from 13 to 17 years of age
    3. if you are 18 to 21 date anyone from 16 to 18 to avoid looking bad and getting accused of stat rape
    4. 22-28 college girls
    5. 29-35 girls in their 20′s
    6. 36-45 late 20′s or 30′s
    i think william is stupid and is going to end up just like my jr high XC coach who is on trial for stat rape of a girl at the time he was 30 and she was 14 1/2

  74. A purely technical question here: My first post, #40, is my first post ever here, it says it’s awaiting moderation, and I can only see it when I’m logged on. Is that normal for a first-ever post?

  75. Douchetastic & lametothemin

    I obviously didn’t mean it on legal terms, I was noting the cause and effect of the post being taken down.

    I already agreed that someone shouldn’t be labelled a “paedophile with zero proof” I just think it would have been better in the long run to label it under a different category like “fatties on rides” or something rather than take it down all together.

    The action of removing the post after it was demanded it be removed just felt absolute.

    (Anyway, not arguing. Let’s just leave it at that.)

  76. You know what would be funny? If carnival guy just molested the shit out of those kids later that night. Boy, I bet you people would feel silly then.

  77. Exactly, Soup. Everyone here is assuming he’s a good guy. He could be a monster, for all we know.

    Post this pic under another category, and it’d be a guaranteed bet the commenters would make pedophile jokes. Just sayin’.

  78. I’m here to say that I have known far too many 12-to-16-year-old *WHORES* in my lifetime – doing everything to anyone with a cock, for fun or for money. These girls were sloppy little pigs and their parents were horrified and devastated as to their behavior.

    I get that it’s illegal to *knowingly* sexually solicit a minor, but I don’t ever automatically assume an underager is some poor exploited angel. :)

  79. Freaking Soup, I think I’m going to stop reading all the comments after yours. Thank you for that spot of humor.

  80. @roydawgg – that’s one strict set of rules! I’m glad not all men abide by them otherwise my (now) husband would never have dated me when I was 17 and he a lot older. 11 years later, married with a kid – huh funny how it works out sometimes.

  81. Now that I’ve read the majority of the comments, I wish I could have seen the picture to see what the big deal was.

  82. Goddamnit where’s this #3 pic people are talking about? I missed it!! :/ Someone explain to me what it entailed?

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