Monday, April 20, 2020

The News Is Loose

GYM TIPS – Can’t wait to get back in the gym to steal towels. Lifting weights is old news. The gym is for watching TV. Never wear shorts at the gym. Everyone does that. Make a statement. Wear jeans and a braided belt. Jean shorts (jorts) are acceptable, BUT only if worn by men. Ladies, wear two necklaces to the gym and yell “2 CHAINZ!” when you walk in. You’re welcome. And finally PLEASE FOLLOW @LAMEBOOK ON INSTAGRAM!

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Friday, April 17, 2020

Cover Your Face

Hold on. WTF! The guy above with a woman’s thong on his face as a mask. He’s wearing face-underwear. We have so many questions. Did he just happen to have a woman’s thong in his car? Is this what “make your own mask” means? Is this dude single and thinking women will see a thong on his face and think “Nice, I’m gonna marry that dude”? Did the media tell him face-underwear would keep him safe from Coronavirus? If so, what news channel is he watching???

ENJOY YOUR FRIDAY! FOLLOW @LAMEBOOK ON INSTAGRAM!

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Reading Rain-whoa

Did everyone obnoxiously roll/throw a bowling ball down the alley next to theirs as a teenager? It seems like everyone was the same kind of annoying at that point in our lives.

FOLLOW @LAMEBOOK ON INSTAGRAM!

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Quarantine Problems

TERRIBLE QUARANTINE TIP OF THE DAY:

If quarantined with your significant other, every time you find one of their loose hairs, slowly pick it up, make a disgusted face, say “You shed like a dog!” and put it on their head. As they start to yell at you, say “Whoa, I’m kidding…it looks more like my ex’s hair.”

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Meeting Of The Rinds

Other possible titles for this post:

  • “Invest In Zest”
  • “A-peeling Quarantine”
  • “Pear Of Fruit Lovers”
  • “One In Melon”
  • “A-peach-iate The Hussle”

They keep getting worse from there. PLEASE DISABLE YOUR ADBLOCKER ON THE SITE! Thank you!

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