Dawnya and her flawless logic! Jesus will curb-stomp you, drive over the speed bumps without slowing down, shit on your insurance papers and flush them in the toilet, drive on red lights, throw the caution lights off-road, pierce your spares and fuck up your engine.
Jesus Christ will fuck you up cause he’s a bad motherfucker!
Jesus H. Christ, Stefany does not know how to make comparisons at all. It’s like she’s playing a game of analogy madlibs.
Also, I certainly hope she’s Croatian or something, otherwise there’s no excuse for spelling her name in such a way. I have a feeling it’s not an ethnic difference but just a parent trying to be “creative” with spelling to make her daughter’s name super special.
I think if Rick is going to pimp out Jesus and his “hole-filling” skills, he needs to at least give us his beeper number and a general idea of how much he charges so I know how many liquor stores I have to knock over on the way to our “meeting”.
mcowles: if you are on here could you post that link to the rick roll window that you did a while back? at least i think that was you….might’ve been slim. or anyone that has something that can demonstrate the power of the rickroll. thank you.
Wrench. Effing beautiful. (And, although roads DO have curbs, do you think that’s supposed to be “curves?” That’s the word more commonly used when people want to illustrate difficulties in their road metaphors.)
So according to this, you can avoid failure by driving correctly. Better euphemism would have been Stop signs = failure, dumbass. Secondly, why is FUCKIN’ JESUS driving MY car over my friends and potentially THROUGH members of my family? I don’t think I like the spare/insurance comparisons but I am getting tired of picking apart this shitty analogy.
@ Cobaltcat…Living in the Bible belt, I naturally have about 25% of my FB feed filled with religious references and Bible verses from friends and family. Being that I am not religious at all, and (although I do believe in God, aka a higher power) I often get annoyed at these constant religious messages taking up my feed, which is meant to be for a status update not a religion billboard. But everyone is entitled to their faith, and for that I will not mock or criticize something they strongly believe in…
@southerngirl – it’s hard not to dislike Bible-thumpers when they practically force feed verses down your throat when you never asked for them. That, and they consistently pick and choose verses that are geared to suit their agenda. If you truly want to follow the Bible, stop candy coating that shit. Why not practice the verses that suggest we stone women that cheat on husbands or strip children naked and make them walk the streets in shame when they misbehave? It’s hard to please everyone, but voicing a dislike of a religion after they badger you with it first is never going to go away…especially on the internet.
@sabretooth47 — like I said, I’m not religious and it gets annoying even to me to have to sift through all that to get to the real news (which is what status updates are for). But there is WAY more stuff on FB to be offended over than Bible verses…lamebook is proof of that with all these little girls talking about f**king their man, complaining about getting herpes, etc., lol . But I hardly feel badgered if someone simply posts a religious quote on there…if it offends me then I can simply block them from my feed updates and move on.
@ lexluther: My pleasure. I had the post in my bookmarks – because I’m just that cool – and it gave me an excuse to sign up to Lamebook after reading it for several months in order to share my wisdom That post was epic. This one, not so much.