Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Much Too Much

previous post: Abs-tinence

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84 Comments

  1. accidentally on purpose hey!

  2. ummmm How do you accidently taste your cum…guys please explain

  3. I think Mikey is Ben.

  4. Ben accidentally tasted his cum once. And boy, did he like it.

  5. If Mikey is Ben then he also is Frodo and herpes. That’s a lot of accidental cum tasting.

  6. It’s my contention that you can’t do it accidentally, unless your aim is ridiculously bad and you shoot yourself in the mouth. No, Mikey wanted to do a little taste test and see what the fuss is all about, but he’s worried his friends will think he’s weird. He hasn’t realized that his friends will still think he’s weird for posting about it on Facebook. But, Mikey, there’s really no shame in it.

  7. Jacob – Tell Rosey Palms I said hello. Jackass.

  8. @cupidcurse – I’ve had it happen a few times. You shoot a little further than anticipated while jerking off and get yourself in the face.

  9. Bulldog – Maybe it was like that one scene from ‘There’s Something About Mary’ when he projectile spunks in his hair (and then Mary thinks it’s hair gel and “borrows” a little). Some guys have a better “range” than others I guess.

  10. You could be right, Tofu, I’ve actually had a near-miss with my face… but still, that’s a tough shot. For one thing, your mouth has to be open. I still say there was intent.

  11. Yum, Mikey likes it! I bet he does it ‘accidentally’ all the time. $10 says he dipped his finger into his used sock and stuck it to his tongue, ya know accidentally.

  12. rebarbativebecc

    @eenerbl
    Ewwww. That’s all.

  13. Well there’s the OTHER option (that goes along with the ‘intent’ suspicion): he may have been testing his own flexibility, so to speak (hehheh) and in the heat of the moment, just didn’t pull out of his own mouth in time.

  14. As long as he’s not gonna try to rim himself next, I suppose it isn’t entirely abnormal… provided he’s under the age of 14.

  15. Speaking of things that I contend aren’t possible….

  16. @fealkj so did you like the taste of yours??? I hope you didn’t facebook it like Mikey…

  17. Bulldog: next time you’re having some alone time with Jill, look in the mirror: I’m sure your mouth will be open. That’s why they call it the “O” face, afterall. It’s like kicking a field goal, I guess. You just got lucky and missed!

    Fealkj: Did it surprise you? When it landed in your mouth?

  18. maybe mikey’s girlfriend went to kiss him afterwards…otherwise wtf? hahahah :)

  19. I tend to clench my jaw, melies. ;)

  20. Cupid – Nope, and nope! Facebook wasn’t around back then :P

    tellmelies – It didn’t land in my mouth. It kinda landed on my upper lip area and dripped downwards while I was laughing.

    Anyway, I don’t jizz on myself anymore. I usually stand up and blow it on the floor and let my dogs do the cleaning.

  21. Oooo…I like that, Bulldog.
    You must be into the angry kind of sex, where you can just pound away. lol

  22. fealkj: you need a girlfriend! Your dogs should not be cleaning that up!

  23. Sorry if #21 was out of line, but when I think of jaw clenching, I think of anger…and concentration.

  24. Tellmelies: It’s surprises me when it lands in my mouth!

    Bull: You need to relax baby, just relax.

    fealkj: Now that’s a ‘ewww’ right there!

  25. My dogs are girls, so it’s not like it’s gay or anything.

  26. een: it doesn’t surprise me, I expect it.

  27. I absolutely love the comments on this one… I am muffling laughter in my office…

    Ahhhh, the ol’ “accidental cum tasting” trick. It only works once… I hope he’s got his story straight.

  28. Melies, I’m absolutely a fan of handing out a good pounding. And een, I am always relaxed right up until the moment when someone’s about to get a taste. ;)

  29. My buddy Mikey sent me a text yesterday, said his girlfriend was taking him to get snowballs.

  30. MonkeyCMonkeyDo

    @29 what’s snowballs????

    hmm.. the things I learn on this thing… amazing.

  31. @monkey – the definition of a snowball is way to gross to post on the internet!

    lets hope the dude got a snowball.. yuck

  32. @monkey
    I would hope by now that I don’t have to direct you to urban dictionary, but just in case…

  33. Snowballing is a great team building activity for girls. Well, I suppose for some guys, too.

    They should really have it at summer camp.

  34. Wow…I seemed to have stepped in at the wrong time with all this snowball talk. I must admit that I find it comical to take a picture of my duper and approach my wife with “Hey honey, check out what I saw today”. She, on the other hand, is not amused.

  35. Maybe that’s how Mikey ‘accidentally’ tasted his own love juice?

  36. Snowballing at summer camp. Interesting. I am sure it would provide minutes of entertainment. :-) So many things I could say here, but I am refraining.

    The poop one is the one that got to me. Do people really do that? I would have no inclination to do that whatsoever.

  37. I said yesterday that I never see status updates about syphilis on facebook… it’s always about herpes.

    My faith is renewed, it’s still out there.

  38. bollywood_rocks83

    1. It seems to me that if you don’t know what syphilis is, you’re too young to be having sex. Don’t they cover that in sex ed in like 8th grade?

    2. Thanks for increasing my vocabulary today, lamebook. This leads to 3
    3. Does it count if there’s no sperm involved?

  39. krasivaya_devushka

    Ughh you guys are sick lol :)

  40. @bolly
    I’m going to have to say yes, sperm must be involved, otherwise its just two hot chicks making out after 69′ing…brb

  41. Why wouldn’t you taste it? Seriously? I’m a girl and curiosity def gets the better of me..

  42. loosername, of course all men taste it, same way they taste their own ear wax.

  43. For the record, girl juice tastes better than boy juice.

  44. I would have thought it would go without saying, Word!

  45. CommentsAtLarge

    Damn that curiosity…

    and word, duly noted – I leave you to make you own “aussie down under” jokes ;)

  46. mikey likes it! we all know he did it on purpose and his friends do too.

  47. Boys, I do want to know what you think of the taste… of your own ear wax, that is.

  48. I’m betting Mikey splooged on his girlfriend and then went down on her later or something of that nature.

  49. @slippyslappy
    Well then that would be “feltching”, not “snowballed”, just so you know.

  50. Word: once again I find myself agreeing with you completely! But then, every part of the woman tastes better than a man ;)

    Thank you Lamebook…once again you have spurred a conversation that has got me all hot and bothered and ready to go

  51. Jacob, I’m getting sex too! Right now! Honest! And I’m definitely not putting this up in public so that all my little school-mates don’t think I never get any! I am good with girls! Honestly!

  52. MonkeyCMonkeyDo

    LOL @ Hobo!

    @phuntyme I’m afraid to look up half the stuff on Urban Dictionary. Never know what one will end up reading!

  53. Feltching?

    I swear you all make me feel like a virgin again with the amount of terminology I do not know.

  54. MonkeyCMonkeyDo

    Then again, it’s the same with Lamebook and I come here day in and day out..

  55. MonkeyCMonkeyDo

    Mollyisme… I agree! It’s like being the uncool person who doesn’t know what all the “cool” people are talking about

  56. MonkeyCMonkeyDo – I think we should just start making up words and go with it.

  57. Monkey and molly, you guys just need to have a good read through urban dictionary. Try these ones too – dirty sanchez, cleavland steamer.

  58. I call frape on the first one.

  59. ew @ last one…

  60. Mmmmm, protein.

  61. Comments, re the “Aussie down under” thing, I will tell you this much… Aussie boys better start eating better, or doing something to improve their flavour.

    They need to take a leaf out of the their New Zealand bros book. The fruit (juice) from the Kiwi’s loins is of a much higher quality, it is extremely palatable. I don’t know what they do to make it better, it just is (I’ve had some extensive experience in the Kiwi fruit area).

    So you Aussie boys, if you have any Kiwi friends, I suggest you get some tips, or I won’t be inclined to go “down under” again.

  62. @wordpervert

    If you can tell a difference in taste between nationalities, you just might be… wait hold that, definitely are a slut.

    If you are a slut, chances are the dudes you are getting with aren’t going to give a shit what you think about the taste of their cum.

  63. It’s called called an educated palate.

  64. I was slightly taken aback, and repeated myself in response to Mr/Ms/It #62.

    Say what you will, many people here feel free to place their value judgements on others, which is so easy on an anonymous forum.

    You know nothing about me, the comment was meant to be humorous, something clearly lost on you.

  65. @Maverician

    Everyone here is aware wordpervert is a total slag. I’ve learnt to skim over its comments because all it writes is smut. Just ignore the attention whore.

  66. Paranoid Android

    Everyone? Really? You canvassed all of lamebook’s users? Musta missed that survey.

    But if we are playing that game, everyone on here thinks you fail on an epic scale you snail, now bail.

  67. uh….actually, kiwi fruit definitely makes a guy AND girl’s juices taste great. who cares if you’re shagging a slut or not? everyone deserves a tasty treat.

  68. Eat a dick, gobsmacked. In fact, have two. Don’t come in here calling Word names to make yourself feel better. I hate that crap… the double standard has always amazed me… women can and should enjoy sex the same as men do. Just because you pine for the days when women were locked in the tower and could only have sex through a hole cut in a sheet doesn’t mean the rest of us should be as unhappy. Get lost.

  69. How is it nobody went with:

    “Let’s give it to Mikey. He won’t eat it, he hates everything.”
    “He likes it! Hey, Mikey!!”

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vYEXzx-TINc

  70. lol

  71. Personally I pine for any day when people (note: not gender based, I never assumed wordpervert was a chick, could be a gay dude, surely?) didn’t so indiscriminately swallow any reasonably transmissive fluids (can’t think of the word I want). Or at least wordpervert, I hope you are warning those NZers.

    On a separate, but equally important note, you seem to think my comment wasn’t meant to be humourous, right? I can’t imagine why. It was as even less insulting than yours was, considering I only was insulting of you, however you were of a whole nation (okay, well, half a nation).

  72. CommentsAtLarge

    Ok, so I was perusing the older posts and came across this. Now, I’m not typically inclined to comment on such things as I find the judgemental and scathing posts to be no fun (and therefore a waste of my time). However, in this case, I am the one who made the initial comment to word and left her open to get blindsided. Sorry wordy, sure didn’t see that coming.

    As for those who are throwing around the derogatory names, I’d love to launch into a well-crafted diatribe extolling the benefits of a sexually liberated individual. Since you took my comment and used it as a vehicle to insult, you just pissed me off so you don’t get that. Instead, you get this: sit on it and rotate you bile-spewing asshats.

    Thank you, that is all.

  73. Oh! Jacob seems like a real prize.

    @Paranoid Android
    That rhymed… a lot. I’m impressed.

    @ Maverician, gobsmacked
    I would like to say that as someone that partook in some pissed arguing awhile back and where saying as much may make me a bit two faced, your posts were over the line, very rude and offensive. You wanna get mad about having to wade through sexting do it in a post where it happens for 200 comments in a row, not one where no one has done anything annoying. Her comment was amusing, and you two sound like shit disturbers. Everyone else has gotten over it. The annoying sexting has actually for the most part been cut down to a tolerable level and if you think Aussies would actually get offended by that comment you must think it’s a nation of pansies.

  74. Thanks to Paranoid, Bulldoggy, and Comments.

    And I never thought I’d say it, but thanks to you as well, Disdain.

  75. Sorry, shouldn’t have said everyone. Those that keep their hands down their pants waiting for wordperfects comments enjoy it being a total slag. The rest of us don’t. I’m annoyed that we have to wade through so much of its shit to get to anything worth reading. I also know I’m not the only one to have commented on this.

    I’m not allowed to post this on this particular thread? Why? Oh sorry…its because you said so.

    I’m calling it names to make myself feel better? Really? It writes like a slag, it is a slag, end of story. I’m sure it knows its a slag. But don’t worry, I’m sure you and it are getting off on you jumping to its defense. I bet that makes you feel better.

    It is an attention whore. If I have to put up with reading its crap, you have to put up with reading my ‘crap’.

  76. CommentsAtLarge

    wow.

  77. I’d have sex with wordpervert, if “it” would let me.

  78. Hmmm… gobsmacked, maybe you could’ve been a tad less insulting. wordpervert is apparently quite popular on here (and I’m sure that’s not all to do with his/her blowjob prowess) and you’ve got to expect his/her fans to come to his/her defence.

    ParanoidAndroid, Bulldog and CommentsAtLarge: nice of you to be wordpervert’s bodyguards, but you all fail massively in the way you did it. You all came off looking like school bullies.

    Oh, and if any of you attack me for posting here before I got your permission, you fail even more.

  79. I wish pants_ahoy was sexually liberated.

  80. How can you possibly be insulted here? This is a fuggin website based on dick, fart, piss, and shit jokes…don’t act all offended because someone was playing along. Way to be fuckwits gobsmacked and Maverician…too bad the comments here aren’t worthy to put back on the main page.

  81. Who's That Girl?

    Ugh…been out for a few days and wish I had come to have my girl’s back! Word – ♥ you! Don’t let the haters bring ya down!

  82. I see the GIFT is at work here. I mainly lurk around here in the shadows… not creepy at all, but after the shitstorm above I have to say something.

    Really, what’s the point of being offended on the internet? I don’t know, maybe I’m just desensitized. Seriously, everything after wordpervert’s post was unnecessary. Flaming is a novelty if anything else. There was nothing offensive about it, and even if there was, pick your damn battles. Youtube taught me that you can get along quite well just ignoring people. Even posts simply saying “I don’t care” take some level of caring to type out.

    I realize how hypocritical this post is: expecting order to be maintained so that I’m not bothered by people being bothered. The actual posts here have been… lame lately but I still have faith in the awesome comments. Otherwise I wouldn’t hang around. Anyway, I am an illusion. You haven’t seen me, okay?

    Back into the shadows I go!

  83. Wow . . .

    I was going to comment on the post, but as I read through the comments, I couldn’t help but to be a little disturbed.The double standard, non-empathetic, four letter name dropping ass poles disturbed me a little when they feel they should censor what someone has to say on a PUBLIC forum. If I recall correctly, I’m pretty sure almost everybody that comments in here is guilty of being a little whoreish with the comments they post.

    Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. With that being said, not everyone is smart enough to have a legitimate opinion.

    I have empathy for the poor souls who have to make themselves feel better by berating somebody they don’t know.

    Gobsmacked, you seem to be the worst of them. I feel sorry for your partner, (IF you have one.) as I can tell you are a controling dick that does not show the slightest bit of equality among your fellow peers.

    I have said all I feel should be. Good day to you all and I hope that maybe one day the abusive ass masters will find out that other people have feelings too. (Yes I am being very hipicritical in this last paragraph.)

  84. wow

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