Thursday, September 3, 2009

More Shit


previous post: Friendly Reminder



  1. I actually LOL’d at the “wiggle it around a little” part. Gross/hilarious mental image.

  2. Well,no shit.

  3. haha, awesome

  4. So the Mom who is breast feeding I guess took immodium to stop her own runs, constipated her daughter? Is that even possible? Another thing how is wiggling a thermometer in the poor kids bum gonna make her poop? Poor kids being raised by a idiot. Give the baby some baby food plums/strawberries/blueberries and stand back. Why do people feel the need to overshare about their babies? I have one and I like to give her a air of mystery. Always leave em guessing/wondering.

  5. ugh…another one? I refuse to comment on this, coz I think the admins have a fetish for baby poop

  6. “Thinking good poop thoughts.” HAH!

  7. And I refuse to comment on Flip’s comment.

  8. mooooo

    i’m so happy the internet didn’t exist when i was a baby.

  9. holy crap, you’re old chairman cow

  10. Jesus Christ, what the fuck. I don’t want not god damn wiggling go on here.

  11. Never mind. It could be pancreatitis.

  12. I haven`t been for a few days , just shoved a pool cue up my arse …. still no joy :(

  13. Its almost impossible for a breast fed baby to become constipated. Most BF infants can go up to a week between poops.

    This mom needs to get herself to a LLL meeting and stop taking advice from dumb asses on facebook.

  14. @Carolyn-I suppose it could be possible;not sure if it crosses over into breastmilk but there are many drugs that do (caffeine,for instance.)
    What I worry about most in all seriousness is possible anal fissure from introducing a rectal thermometer and “wiggling it.”
    This person should be calling her pediatrician,not posting it on FB! My younger son had difficulty passing stool and we were advised to give him mineral oil.
    Wow,I think this is one of the first times I have posted something on here that wasn’t sarcastic….

  15. Jesus christ, *agrees with Ummm..Yeah*, why not call her pediatrician rather than letting everyone else know. But seeing as she can apparently take medicine herself that makes her daughter constipated, she must be some sort of magical healer!

    On the other hand, that thinking good poop thoughts was pretty funny.

  16. Lets all poop together!

  17. Maybe she should keep poking things up the baby’s bottom and see what works.

  18. “Thinking good poop thoughts” is so going to become my new way of signing off convos. Who needs xox when you can be letting someone know you hope that they take a really satisfying dump soon?

  19. This isn’t cool. I mean, if you need advice on the subject, then send someone a private message, but if you put “shit” like this on your facebook status, there’s ether something seriously wrong with you, or you’re crying out for attention.
    I’m banking on attention.

  20. “Poor Alice” is right. Enjoy being a prop in The Vanessa Show for the rest of your life.

  21. Baby stuff really needs to be segregated off to its own corner of the internet where the rest of us can be free of it and the breeders can realize NO ONE CARES YOUR KID CRAPPED OR STARTED SCHOOL

  22. @ Aaron poehler , bit harsh , bet you will feel different one day , but agree only those concerned are interested

  23. How much immodium would one need to drink for it to pass over to the baby? I really hope she never stuck anything in that poor baby’s back door. :( And I totally agree some people have kids as props in their own little show that they put up on f.b. Im not innocent I have bought a few goofy hats and plopped them on my kids head and laughed my ass and posted the pics. But damn if a baby in a Carmen Miranda fruit hat is wrong, then I dont want to be right!

  24. U guys suck!!! don’t u know baby’s shitting is a beautiful, natural thing. U’s don’t understand cos u don’t have kids. Im 16 and my babys the best.

  25. ok, am I the only one who is concerned that some mother thinks it’s ok to insert object in her baby’s bottom unnecessarily? Those thermometers are only when there might be a fever, and then should only be used for measuring that, and NOT be wiggled around…wtf??

  26. …btw referring to the danger mentioned above physically and also what concerns me is the mother thinks it’s ok to violate the kid like that…not good.

  27. Now I know what to do the next time I’m all bunged up.

  28. Breeders… they’re SO special!

  29. That’s wonderful advice Katie! There should be no need to use a rectal thermometer unless a person has had mouth surgery in which case there are plenty of other methods and they are for checking temperatures not for digging out poo!

  30. I’m always thinking good poop thoughts. hmmmmnnn

  31. That may even be my favourite quote on here, replacing Emmanuel’s ‘I ain’t got no favorite quotations’!

  32. I love Aaron Poehler my thoughts excatly number 21!

  33. Rough. Lovely to know about Vanessa’s beautiful daughter having a poo. A little bit like a friend of mine on FB who’s status was ‘is happy that the birthing scars are healing and she is walking a bit more normally now’. Defaced!

    *thinking good poop thoughts*

  34. Ktie knows how to dig shit up!

  35. We need a card for “Thinking good poop thoughts”. Get on it Hallmark.

  36. Because when I need medical advice, the first place I go to is Facebook.

    I guess we ought to be relieve that Katie didn’t recommend Vanessa stuff a garden hose up that kid’s ass.

  37. Jesus Christ, but babies are boring as fuck. I’m glad my breeder friends have the good sense to refrain from posting shit like this as their own status updates, or I’d seriously be conducting a cleaning jihad on my friends list.

  38. This isn’t lame; it’s sad.

  39. Yeah but “sadbook” doesn’t have the same ring to it. I don’t know what’s in sadbook and already I’m feeling a bit teary.

  40. Just give the baby coffee and a cigarette. Works every time.

  41. Carolyn made me laugh.

  42. Well, I would give the kid some Piccolax, put a crash helmet on the baby and definitely stay upwind and well back….anyone who has ever had Piccolax will understand what I mean….

  43. Why couldn’t this mother have taken the pill to prevent this poor kid’s conception. Move over Dr Spock

  44. Billy Wilders Dead Monkey

    wrong cunts

  45. I love it when people feel cool for saying “breeders”… you don’t need to use code words, we know you’re not getting laid.

  46. It’s actually quite dangerous for a baby NOT to boob, dummies. LOL

  47. I mean POOP LMAO not boob…

  48. Actually doctors will often tell you to take your child’s temperature rectally to try and get them to go. It is a reflex for the baby to try and poop. Ask any parent who has taken a rectal temperature.

    And, yes, babies, and toddlers should have their temperatures taken rectally as it is more acurate.

  49. rectal thermomaters are actually dangerous if u dontknow what ur doing. u can damage stuff…especially if ur wriggling it around like a dumbass

  50. Forget the rectal thermometer. Who has one of those anyways? Just use a high powered hand mixer. Put it on ‘Frappe’ for a minute or twelve and that baby will be fine!

  51. Oh yeah, use just ONE of the egg beater things, not both. That’d be a tight squeeze! Not to mention the spray back…

  52. Was going to say sort of the same thing as S. My pediatrician told me to dab a cotton swab with vaseline and wipe across my daughters rectum to stimulate that reflex…It’s nasty, but works

  53. Ew, why the fuck do people need to talk about their babies like that? It’s disgusting…

  54. To all you “doctors” A: Infantile constipation is quite common (i dont think is associated with the immodium) and B: It is a common practice to use a thermometer per rectum for stimulation and it is advicable from most paediatricians. Nothing wrong with it.

  55. YOu people are morons.. Don’t post on something you obviously know nothing about…

    I have an 8 week old, and she gets constipated often. Unlike this mother, we DID call her doctor. We also called the pharmacist, and my mother. ALL of them said to give her the thermometer. No, you don’t “wiggle it” around, but you use it just as if you are taking their temp (which is the way ANY doctor will tell you to take a baby’s temp)

    And the medicine the mother took MORE than likely did not cause the baby’s constipation. Most medicine does not cross into the breaskmilk, which also means that she couldn’t of taken a medicine to get rid of it for her baby. Ask any lactation specalist that one…

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