is it just me or is mia a huge bitch? i mean, the guy was totally polite. nothing inappropriate. she should have just left it alone after he said it was her loss, but she just HAD to get the last word in. typical bitch.
She did say “too old & not interested”
Wasn’t that enough for him to back off? Obviously not he had to respond to her and he came off like a pathetic loser after not giving up and responding to her once again with 4 separate posts. She has every right to say what she wants to say to him as he was the one who wouldn’t give it up and take the fact that she is obviously not interested in him at all. With some guys you need to be more aggressive and bitchy because otherwise they keep pursuing.
agreed, which was my point when i said she should have left it alone. he ended by saying “your response wasn’t what i’d hoped for, but it truly is your loss.” thereby ending his attempts at pursual. she then added her bitchy little comment, and it irritated him. after that he basically tells her that her beauty is only skin deep and makes some attempts at making her feel bad for being so snotty. he eveen says “it’s kewl if you don’t like that,” basically telling her that he accepts that she doesn’t like him. and then she went on to further insult him instead of just ignoring it. i definately think it was a case of an ego-boost at someone else’s expense, especially because she posted it here for other people to laugh at too.
Looks like Joe didn’t get the first hint that she wasn’t interested… I don’t feel sorry for him, no matter how rude and pretentious she came off as. She could’ve dropped it but then again he felt the need to send her multiple messages as if to have “the last say” in order to avenge his ego. Apparently it is more than okay to be assertive unless you’re a woman these days >.>
It’s funny how if she would’ve accepted his advances you’d still be calling her a bitch and stupid slut for dating a desperate guy on the internet. Also, I’m pretty sure if she was your daughter randomly hanging out at the mall or restaurant with friends and this “Joe” guy approached and pulled the same thing, you’d sing a different tune.
i never said he wasn’t pathetic. and yes, i would be upset if it was my daughter. but im going to give a big resounding “NO” to me still thinking she would be a stupid slut or bitch if she had accepted. we date who we date because we are attracted, not because of age. and “desperate people” meet all the time on the internet. its the new technological age we’re in. all im saying is that if she really wasn’t intereested, and she wasn’t a bitch, she would have just ignored him. that’s not to say that he wasn’t pathetic in his multiple posts, but he wasn’t rude to her at all. can you blame him for wanting to save his ego??
They’re both idiots, but that aside…
“With some guys you need to be more aggressive and bitchy because otherwise they keep pursuing.”
1) If Hollywood has taught us anything, it’s that no matter how hard-to-get a female acts, what she really wants is for the man to pursue her harder and harder to win her over. This is especially true in so-called “chick flicks,” and it’s impossible to tell what a woman wants based solely on her words or attitude.
2) This guy kept responding in order to clarify her insulting assumptions and correct her limited thinking. If she had been polite, as he said, that could have been the end of it. If politeness had not done the trick, then she could turn on the aggression.
Her first 3 words (in separate posts) are “seriously?” and “too old”. That’s not simply rejection, that is rude. She clearly doesn’t have the ability to just step back and be frank. The only pretentious thing that he said was that she’ll go through “years of heart ache”, even though he didn’t explicitly say that. Yes, he was overly wordy, but he was appropriately dismissive of her pretentiousness. The only other mistake he made was to try and teach her a lesson she clearly didn’t want to learn, but I’d do the same thing if I were bored and single. Let’s not forget that girls are prone to a thing called “drama”, and that can happen even when nobody else is looking.
Why does this read like the order of the responses were switched?
And I must add, as a woman, Mia is not being a bitch at all. She is not leading him on in any way. She’s not interested. This is not a signal to guys that we want you to “try harder,” or to keep sending messages pleading your case. It means go away. Trying to hook up with girls, especially if you’re several years older than those girls, via facebook message is skeevy. It’s creepy, and it makes you look desperate. Good for her for not being turned on by this creeper.
-Guy keeps commenting and leaves a couple insulting paragraphs
-Girl rebuffs him AGAIN
Etiquette aside, age is the keyword here. If your an older man hitting on a younger woman, you have to be respectful of the age difference, if she tells you straight out “no your too damn old” than back the hell off.
Trying to push any further interaction could very well place your actions in the predator category.
By the way, has anybody considered that this is facebook?
Anyone calling this girl a bitch, might as well tell me to be polite and respectful to guys on the street trying to grab my ass.
Based on the fact that she uses the word “pedophile” and says she just graduated I’m going to make an educated guess that she’s about 17. Seeing as he’s most likely older than forty his behavior is predatory and she can be as bitchy as she wants.
Theres a polite way to reject someone and Mia certainly didnt take that route. She took the Bitchy Cunt route. It would have been more acceptable for her to lie in that situation. She should have she has a bf or shes not looking for a relationship right now. Mia is a dumb ass bitch who thinks shes funny but shes not. she’ll probably end up in a abusive relationship with that retarded attitude of hers.
@36: She’s not required to act any certain way at all. That’s what makes her a loser in this scenario too – she doesn’t have to respond at all, especially after she has already said “no, not interested,” and yet there she is, still talking to him. Is ignoring him positive feedback in your view? Because that’s what Mia SHOULD have done.
I love how he tries to slam her for, basically, judging a book by it’s cover because part of the reason why she rejected him was for his age. But, he then goes on to say that “even if you were 500lbs, and called me handsome, I would thanks you for it .” So, he would appreciate an overweight woman calling him handsome but wouldn’t considering dating her because she’s overweight, but she’s supposed to give him a chance even though she doesn’t want to date someone much older than her. Yay for hypocrisy.
If Mia is “too young to understand how love works” (because age definitely equals emotional and mental maturity), perhaps Joe answered his own question about her being a perfect match for him. She’s too young. And according to Joe’s mindset she’s too much of a child to have any manners so what business does he have dating one?
Everyone in here calling Mia a bitch is someone who’s been rejected themselves.
The old fuck was crazy. She said no, he kept on. Yeah, she could have just blocked him, but still. She wasn’t a bitch in how she responded. Most people I know would have went wayyy further than she did.
@crazydude She said, “I’m not interested.” She has no obligation to lie to someone trolling her facebook to hit on her. And the fact that you call her a “bitchy cunt” for that makes you sound like someone who perpetuates abuse against women, so enjoy your future in prison. “Cunt” is not exactly a “polite” term.
@Ripley, you tell them girl. Not only isn’t “Cunt” a polite term, it also wasn’t used correctly. Crazydude, refers to Mia as being a bitchy cunt; this is a violation of several UN rules plus 2 articles in the Geneva convention and should not be tolerated.
More appropriate and totally acceptable would have been “bitchy FUCKING cunt”
Mia loses for pretentiousness.
Joe loses full-stop. Nobody’s yet mentioned the fact at the end he figures if he can’t pump her (and he hasn’t given up complete hope yet, because she’s still responding…), he’ll pump her for info on how to potential pump other hot young thangs?
(Also, hi Lamebookers! I’m one of those many lurkers who timidly post bi-annually.) *waves*
You’ve never had some loser try and hit on you on your Facebook, bapsy? I thought all of us girls have had at least one experience like the above one. But if you haven’t, you’re lucky, Trust me, honey, you don’t won’t to find them.
Sadly, what turned me off about Joe has been overlooked; was his “nice single girl-guy” comment not the oddest part of this exchange. Granted, mia does in fact seem a little cunt-ish, especially, as one of you yahoos put it, she must be proud enough of her wit to post this/ disperse it onto the ‘net. A solid win it was not, in fact I barely cracked a smile at any point in this exchange.
I’m a and I think Joe sucks. Some guys just don’t get the hint. A girl shows interest in a man within 5 seconds of meeting them and it’s obvious to see it. A guy keeps hitting on her with lame ass pick up lines needs to have his testicles removed.
How can anyone say that he doesn’t get the hint? His first post is the proposition. The second is a clarification. The third is the acceptance of her dismissal while explaining the simple fact that age is only what you make of it. The rest of his bloviating is trying to teach her a lesson, which he should have known by then was a waste of time. But it’s not creepy. It’s not pedophilia. He’s not crazy. She’s not crazy, simply immature and pretentious, which is not atypical for people of her age.
What I really hate is how all women dramatize that they are being stalked all of the time. The inflation of your collective rhetoric makes it seem like you are in constant danger, when this is in fact about as nice a proposition one can receive on facebook beside the fact that he didn’t just give up on talking to her right away.
I had a friend recently post a picture on facebook of a note a guy left on her car at her apartment complex. He wasn’t rude or crude, just left his number, said that she was cute, and that she could call if she wanted to get coffee some time. Would she have rather him confront her directly either at her car or even worse at her apartment? I don’t think so. Instead, he’s the ultimate “creep” for leaving it on her car to deal with however she wants without him around. Yeah… real creepy. I should also note that this is the same girl that I had asked out 6 years ago. She said yes, but when I called her up to set up an actual date, she said that she felt weird about it and didn’t want to go on a date anymore. She was overly dramatic at that point too, even though my proposition was merely for a date. Nothing serious. Rejection wouldn’t have been a problem, and it wasn’t when she finally got around to it. But it’s silly and counterproductive as a society when women believe that they in constant danger when in fact they are safer than any time in the last 40 years given historical violent/sexual crime data.
Simply put, have some perspective! If a guy that is not your type (too old, young, ugly), feel free to say “eww” under your breath, but don’t tell him that. Tell him you’re not interested. If he contacts you again, tell him that you have already stated that you are not interested and that if he replies again that you will file a police report. This goes for real life or online. Of course, in real life, such an interaction can escalate for the worse much more quickly, so keep that in mind as well to keep yourself safe.
When creepy guys proposition you and won’t give up, sometimes the fastest way to get rid of them is to be blunt. “I won’t go out with you, I don’t date older guys, and you creep me out with your tremendously long explanations for your every move. I don’t KNOW you, I don’t LIKE you, please go away.”
Her first response SHOULD have been enough for him, but homie just KEPT GOING. Not only was it creepy, it was condesending. Going from saying “I’m not interested” to “I’m filing a police report” sometimes causes MORE trouble.
Frankly, any guy still using “kewl” deserves what he gets.
Her first response was ambiguous. It could have been the reply to the wrong message, it could have meant a lot of things. She was ambiguous, knowingly or not.
His second message was for clarification. By his third post he had given up on propositioning her and wanted to try and teach her a life lesson.
Condescending, I get, though it was conditional in that she certainly was acting pretentious and immature instead of taking the few seconds to at least be completely unambiguous and possibly even courteous to start with.
And you don’t tell them that you are or did file a police report. You warn them that you will if they contact you again. If you have given them a clear warning, you follow through with it, keep whatever evidence you need, and then block the person in whatever ways you can.
And your comment on “kewl” is exactly the kind of rhetoric that is hurtful in this society. Say he seems douchey, or out of touch, or anything that is merely an opinion. But saying that he “deserves what he gets” because he likes to type a word like he did 10 years go in chat rooms is inflationary and unnecessary. That comment is in the same direction (though admittedly not the same severity) as saying that girls that dress like sluts have some fault in being raped. That’s ridiculous, and so is your comment.
Also, I don’t see how filing a police report can cause more trouble. If somebody is talking to you on facebook, 95% of the time you will have an accurate name and photo of the person, which is much more detail than can be gathered in most police reports from other random encounters.
@goober using the example of one dramatic girl to make your point is retarded. We all know girls like that, who like to claim they are being “stalked” all the time to boost their own ego, but using it as a generalization that all women are overly dramatic and feel that we are in constant danger is insulting. I’m a woman and since adolescence I have had no choice but to build up a healthy contempt for the lecherous and creepy men (old and young) who have invaded my personal space and made me feel icky since I started wearing a bra in 8th grade. I don’t label all men this way, but in order to protect my own personal safety I have absolutely no problem being rude in order to get someone to back off. Sue me if I enjoy shutting down some asshole, but you will find you build up some anger when you can’t go for a run, to the grocery store, or out for a drink with your friends without being accosted by perverts without 2 brain cells to rub together. If Mia was my daughter I would fucking pat her on the back and take her out for ice cream.
It is safe to assume that this girl is 18 and just graduated from high school. It is also safe to assume that this guy is near or over 40. I could commend the progressiveness of your thinking, but I have to disagree. That is most definitely creepy. Someone above mentioned that if this guy came up to this girl at the mall, alarm bells would be going off all around. I guess we can curse “society” for condemning a 20 year age difference, or we can call it what it is: the dude doesn’t have the mental or physical capacity to please a woman in his age group so he is hoping to fool an 18 year old girl into thinking he’s worth her time.
P.S. – your overuse of vocabulary words makes you sound like an idiot. “Not atypical”? Just say typical dude…you sound like a college kid trying to make his crappy term paper sound better.
Did I say that all women are overly dramatic? If I did I sincerely apologize. I’m just saying that it’s more prominent in my opinion than men. Especially in relationships. The memory of men is based on facts or events, whereas women is more on emotion (how did you feel?). But disregard all of that if you’d like.
As far as my vocabulary use, if you couldn’t tell from previous posts, I abhor ambiguity–especially when more clarity is easily attained with little additional effort. When I construct a sentence, I do it with purpose. I don’t rush communication because the purpose of communication is for the receiving person to understand my thought, not to inspire random thought in around the same area that I was trying to express. For the specific case of “not atypical”, a grammar nazi would have told me that it’s a double-negative, and therefore a grammatical error. I call it using my poetic license, just like adding seemingly superfluous commas and putting all punctuation outside quotation marks. It makes more sense, syntax-wise.
If you couldn’t tell, I can identify a lot with Joe Schmoe in the example, here. At least insofar as his general attitude and his excessive wordiness. Differences between us, I’m only 26, married, with two kids (boys) under 3. I hate to think that women would feel threatened by asking a simple question. That’s all it really is. If the “proposition-er” is not trying to coerce the “propisition-ee” then it’s merely a simple question. Are you interested, yes or no? And such a simple question should never be loaded with bogus intention.
There’s nothing wrong with being attractive. There’s nothing wrong with rejecting a guy (or even EVERY guys). Don’t feel guilty. Don’t feel compelled to say one thing or another. Just be as kind to that stranger as you would anybody else that stumbled across your path. Neither would do you any harm in most cases, so why do you hold contempt for one and not the other? I think what you may be overlooking is the concept of escalation. You say that:
“I don’t label all men this way, but in order to protect my own personal safety I have absolutely no problem being rude in order to get someone to back off. Sue me if I enjoy shutting down some asshole, but you will find you build up some anger when you can’t go for a run, to the grocery store, or out for a drink with your friends without being accosted by perverts without 2 brain cells to rub together. ”
Do you escalate yourself to total bitch mode right away, or do you give them a chance to back off before that? I’m sure that you are nicer than that to start off with. And total bitch mode is absolutely warranted if they don’t back off after being told, especially in real life. Besides, bitch can be a loaded word, and I don’t mean for it to have a negative connotation on women, just like I don’t think calling me a “dick” would have a negative connotation on men. These words typically describe behavior which can be warranted or unwarranted, and depending upon their use and intent are what reflect on the person themselves.
Just an example of how I use the concept of escalation in my everyday life, I start with a verbal notification to my son if he is behaving inappropriately. If he continues, I warn him that he will be put in time out if he continues. Then if he continues, I take him directly to timeout. An example of improper escalation is when my wife made dinner last night. I wasn’t especially hungry, and I was holding my 4 week old son who was nearly asleep and I told my wife I didn’t feel like eating. She got pissed off instantaneously because in her mind, I was rejecting the food that she slaved over, but it only took her a minute to realize that it was not a big deal and she apologized.
Lastly, you are willing to venture a guess that this guy can’t get a woman his age, but that’s rather irrelevant even if it’s true. There’s no fooling going on, unless you also assume that he’s not actually a “nice guy”. The man has his preferences, and there’s nothing wrong (in my mind) with asking a question.
you actually did say all women are overly dramatic:
“What I really hate is how all women dramatize that they are being stalked all of the time”.
**All women, all of the time**
After wading through all the repetitive bullshit you just posted, I have to tell you that if your goal is to get your point across, your “poetic license” is a major inhibitor to that end. Although I like to think of your brand of “poetic license” as “pompous ass syndrome”, so I am not surprised that you identify with the old guy, as he was equally pompous and condescending as soon as the girl stated in a most matter-of-fact way that she was not interested, as he was too old. He then goes on to imply that she is going to be a poor single mom and that she is a “bad person” to whom bad things will happen, simply because she didn’t say thank you to him for telling her she was beautiful. I can only speak from my personal experience, but this exchange is pretty common offline as well. If approached by someone that I am not interested in, I do not “escalate into bitch mode”; I like to firmly and non-offensively decline an unwanted advance (my mother was British, good manners were pounded into my skull growing up). Although 9 times out of 10 this is not effective, and I think most women can back me up on that one. Being polite or even just a non-committal “no” just spurs them on. So yeah, most of the time “bitch mode” is required, and I think in this post Mia was completely justified. He was an ass from the start and he pissed her off.
You do win a prize; you get to bask in your over-inflated sense of self-importance for the rest of the afternoon! I bet it will feel great.
I already said that if I said that, that’s clearly not what I meant and apologized for it. I didn’t properly qualify the statement, making it an over-generalized blanket statement.
I have many points. I’m not pompous, simply vocal. I’m not confrontational, you make good points, and you clearly know how to protect yourself. He was condescending and presumptuous, absolutely, but only after she was pretentious and, initially, ambiguous and insufficiently dismissive. It is absolutely dickish of guys to not take no for an answer “9 times out of 10″ as you described. There’s no excuse for that. That should change. All I want people to see is that there’s nothing wrong with asking a question, and you only escalate when they are impeding you intentionally. Briefly taking your attention in a safe environment to ask a question is not an impediment, but sustained attempts for your attention without your consent is.
I also contend with your notion that he was an “ass from the start”, which seems to stem from the attitude that simply asking a girl out is wrong.
You seem to misunderstand my wordiness as a sense of self-importance. I am smart enough to know that I am only as important as other people make me, but I won’t let myself get upset over misunderstandings, either. I like to think that I can tell the difference.
One other minor point, you can’t seem to admit that she was at all pretentious. Her “seriously?” comment suggests that she thinks that he should have known before talking to her that she thought that he was too old to even be talking to her. That’s pretense. And it’s immature. Societal norms are only normal expectations, not requirements for behavior.
to the person who said “this is facebook, you might as well tell me to be polite to men who slap my ass on the street” or whatever you said: i find that comment laughable. the same “men” who would slap your ass on the street are the guys who on facebook are equally insulting and disgusting. a pig in life is a pig on facebook. i think if he had seen her in the mall or the street, he probably would have said the same things. yes, its creepy. yes, its pathetic. but not rude, obscene, or inappropriate. a simple, quick “no thanks, not interested, you’re too old” would have worked. but the “seriously?” comment, like he DARED speak to her despite her being the almighty woman that she is, was a little much.
@goober – You’re not seeing this from a young girl’s perspective because you haven’t been there, and that’s understandable. There’s nothing that states her actual age, but being under 18 in many states would make a relationship illegal, in which case, he should know better. If not, then he should know better anyway. Her responses are immature because she’s young!! If you were a young girl with little life experience, and an older, grown man was hitting on you, you would likely feel a bit defensive, too. She doesn’t know his intentions. There is no rule that you have to show absolute kindness when you feel that way. Plus, you don’t know what her history with men may have been.
He IS too old to be talking to her. And it’s immature because she’s 18. Yes, it can be read as pretentious, and I definitely don’t think I made that my argument at any point. I was simply saying that a young girl isn’t required to be polite or accomodating to a 40 year old man trying to hit on her via facebook. And I’m sorry, but which is worse, an immature girl making a snarky comment or a middle aged man coming back and on her and telling her she will end up divorced and that “bad things happen to bad people”. He is by far the winner in immaturity.
so bad experiences with men gives her the right to be bitchy to any man she encounters? oh wait, i get it. i once had a bad experiece in a hospital, so now every time i talk to a doctor im a huuuge bitch. true, she doesnt know his intentions, but he’s not propositioning her with sex. he didnt even get around to asking her for a date. he simply told her she was beautiful (which i’d rather get than hot or sexy any day) and asked if she was single.
I didn’t say that there wasn’t an excuse for her immaturity, just that it doesn’t excuse her behavior from being criticized (ultimately for her benefit). I hated people telling me that I was immature because I was young, but my solution was to show them my maturity instead of getting angry.
And no, she doesn’t know his true intentions, but she’s also in no real danger, either. The only connection they have is virtual, and can be cutoff at any time. She doesn’t have to be nice, but because somebody thinks differently from her (he doesn’t have an issue with the age difference) is not an excuse to lash out. He started off kindly, and she could have responded in kind.
How could he have known that information before the second to last sentence of her last message? I could be wrong, but she appears to be Asian, and could very well look much younger for her age, as they often do. Again, pretense. And no she doesn’t need to be nice. She simply could be, and I would imagine that it would be the desired means as long as the desired result (he stops bugging her) is met.
For age, I do agree that he is far more immature than he should be. He’s clearly insecure as well. Instead of just dismissing her snark, he took it personally and tried to explain it to her instead. But she is also more likely to learn from this encounter than he will, so I’d hope that she’s nicer (and less ambiguous!) in the future than she was in this case. On the other hand, he’s not likely to change at all. He’ll keep propositioning young women. Sometimes he’ll succeed, sometimes he won’t. But ultimately, it does not appear as if he means any harm.
Both sides have good points. The women are used to guys hitting on them and so they’re quick to insult, and the guys are used to trying to hit on women and coming across as creepy if they don’t do it the right way, and/or women acting arrogant and prissy. I know I’ve come off as creepy in the past when I’ve been shy and trying to talk to someone, which is annoying. I think creepy is used waaaay too much. His initial comment: Nice. Not creepy. So he likes younger women. If she’s of age, it’s fine.
Her response: Arrogant.
His response: Defensive.
Creepy would’ve been if he kept hitting on her after she said no, but he turned to insults, which is immature, but definitely not creepy. His comments after her really were lashing out, but he kept trying to be nice even at the end. He was angry but he wanted everything to work out, it’s simple human emotion.
However, considering the age, it’s easy to say that he’s more at fault as she’s young. I can see both sides to the argument.
However, this should be in WTFights, or some other category, but Mia has no win here.
Ugh ugh ugh. This is exactly why, whenever someone hits on me online and I’m not interested (and don’t personally know them), I just DO NOT RESPOND. They can say I’m a bitch and it’s my loss, but at least I don’t have to waste my time explaining what it is about him I don’t like, why he’s not better than my boyfriend, and whatever the hell else point they decided to make to get that positive response.
Same exact thing happens in bars. I used to say, “no thanks, I have a boyfriend, not interested,” what have you. They would ARGUE with me. “c’mon baby we’ll hang out it’ll be really cool, what’s your boyfriend got on me.”
IT IS NOT A NEGOTIATION
So when I get asked, I say no once. If they argue, I give them my # to get them out of my face, and then never respond.
tl;dr : many dudes don’t take no for an answer and sending a facebook message to someone does not create an obligation in the recepient to respond at all, let alone politely
okay I’m a guy and my GF always gets this creepy ass guys doing this crap. has anyone ever found true love like this?! No because all guys think this is the easiest way to get laid. throw this guy in jail with all his other rapist buddies.
I think goober is just as big a douchebag as joe; generalizing women on how they might act isn’t cool. And in comments sections on sites like this, nobody cares how well you can type.
I like Mia. I think she acted in a pretty mature way; she told Joe she wasn’t interested and when he kept ramblin’ on trying to make his point, she showed him she meant business and no means no. She stepped up and defended herself which i think is a nice quality for young girls to have.
After having read through all the comments (I’m really bored at the moment), I’d have to say… Goober, you suck balls dude. You must be 40 and have yourself, tried hitting on younger girls and failed just as bad as Joe. Hence, you have this need to defend the guy. Otherwise, how could anyone defend someone as sad and pathetic as Joe?
i think this exchange was interesting. guy sees woman he thinks is attractive, guy approaches , guy is rejected..been goin on for long time.they guy got feeling hurt but got way over the top and very dramatic..”bad things happen to bad people”..that is a very creepy line. The girl just wanted guy to leave her alone, but she did through in some body blows.I think women in general should be cautious of men who approach them either through facebook or any other means, and heck..men should be cautious of women too.
Both of them are assholes, they belong together. She’s a raging cunt who can’t figure out how to turn someone down without being obnoxious and aggressive and he’s trolling down the wrong avenues trying to pick up girls on FB who are too young.
No one is a winner here. Except us. Because we got to read this awesomely bad exchange between two assholes.
“After having read through all the comments (I’m really bored at the moment), I’d have to say… Goober, you suck balls dude. You must be 40 and have yourself, tried hitting on younger girls and failed just as bad as Joe.”
I already stated upthread that I’m 26, married, with two young children (one boy almost 3 and another boy just a month old). Either you refuse to take my words at face value, you have terrible reading comprehension, or your are otherwise willfully ignorant. In any case, I stated my relevant experience with this sort of girl, though in my case, I think her hesitance came from her knowing my ex-girlfriend of 2 years (which happened with a lot of girls that knew us together). Either way, I was the one just trying to get an unambiguous answer out of her just like this guy, but I gave up much more quickly. I didn’t want to hurt her like this guy. I didn’t want to make her angry. I just wanted to know her real response to “Do you want to go out some time?” When she finally got around to saying no, I walked away. No big deal.
“Hence, you have this need to defend the guy. Otherwise, how could anyone defend someone as sad and pathetic as Joe?”
I defend the truth. And the truth is, people on the internet and elsewhere should be far less inflammatory and judgmental. This guy started out nice. He didn’t know how old she was. She could have been nicer to start off with, or at least unambiguous in her denial of his advances. The sad thing about you is that you have no imagination of how anybody could defend this person. Nobody is so vile or vapid that some small part of them could not be defended on its own merits. Think of some person that you know well but you absolutely hate. There must be some redeeming quality to that person, even if it doesn’t redeem them completely. Even if you can’t see it, you should at least imagine that it’s there. “Be kind, for everyone you know is fighting a great battle.”
“I think goober is just as big a douchebag as joe; generalizing women on how they might act isn’t cool. And in comments sections on sites like this, nobody cares how well you can type.”
You can think that I’m a douchebag. I humbly entertain that possibility every day of my life, so it’s nothing new. But I did retract my generalized statement about “all women’s” proneness to drama and apologized. Also, you just made the same mistake that you are criticizing me for. You said that “nobody cares how well you can type”, but what you really meant was “a few others and I don’t care how well you can type”. There have been quite a few already that, if nothing else, appreciate the way that I communicate, which is the same on and offline.
ok fine goober, maybe i did generalize people; but what i did not do was generalize WOMEN. MAybe some people do care about how others type, but i’m not one of them. I believe you can talk or type however you want, as long as you are able to properly write in an essay, resume, job application, etc.
I wasn’t necessarily looking forward to an argument with you, therefore i am not trying too hard. I was just posting my opinion because that is one of the great freedoms i have here in Canada, and i finally decided that i should excersive that right of miune.
I wasn’t looking for an argument, either. I’m just defending that which should be defended, in my opinion. You generalized in your post criticizing how I over-generalized, proving at least to me that it’s trivially easy to do. Because of that, I don’t take such statements literally and don’t criticize those that make those statements. No blanket statement about people is always true. I knew that you didn’t mean that nobody appreciated the way that I spoke, that’s why I clarified what you meant instead of taking offense to it.
And I don’t think that you are taking your thought to it’s logical end as far as how people “talk or type”. The logical end, in my opinion, to communication is to take my thought and put it into somebody else’s brain, uncorrupted, and that can happen over any medium, be that an essay, resume, or job application.
I’m glad that you have the right to post your opinion in Canada. I’m glad you have the right to disagree with me. I’m glad that I am capable of being wrong in front of other people so that I can change and grow to be a better person. I’m glad because things could be very different for all of us who are so lucky as to have the option to post brief, unimportant, ineffectual rantings on obscure internet sites. That we have gotten this far in civilization is a marvel, but it’s still not enough for me.
The moral proclamation of all young and old who couldn’t care less about being an adult even in the far reaches of the internet. That’s ok. I’m sure you’re nice in person. I have more faith in people than the internet would have me believe. Not that the internet’s a bad thing or a force of evil, it’s really more indicative of a time in the world where we need to do far less to survive than we used to. But there’s no excuse for intellectual dishonesty. No excuse for not doing the best you can, given your circumstances. And I honestly think that you could be better than you are, or at least present yourself better than you have.
thanks for calling me nice. and yes i definitly am better than i present myself, but it’s the internet so i dont care because nobody knows who i really am and anybody can be whatever they want on the internet.
“given your circumstances” sounds like a bit of an insult to me and pisses me off a bit, but i guess that could be up to the reader’s interpretation.
and i actually did read your comment but was too sleepy to take it all in and process it into stuff that i could understand, so i looked for a brief and simple response so i could move on to other problems or circumstances that i needed to deal with.
It’s kinda funny how many people are claming that they’re both jackasses, and some even sideing with Joe, saying that Mia should have been nicer. Are you all thinking straight?
The man is a pervert who got what he deserved. The girl obviously turned him down, but he kept going. You say that she was pretentious. Why? Because of one line “seriously?”. Please the man was a creeper. He went from normal to psychic psycho in under two post. Claiming that she’ll have a life of heart break, a bastard child, bills to pay, and (I assume) a horrible job, because she turned him down. And you can claim all you want that it was because she was being a bitch and he was trying to save face, but she wasn’t when he started his little rant and he wouldn’t have said anything if she had said yes.
Also, this is the internet. THE INTERNET. This is the place were s.o.bs, bitchs and trolls thrive on their douchebaggery. And you’re angry that she wasn’t nicer. By internet standards that was nice. Frankly speaking that was quite mannerly. You all know that their are thousands of other people who would have used more curse words and derogatory comments. I’m actually surprise she didn’t call him a word that begins with a f and ends with a aggot.
And just imagine this happening in real life. And obviously teenage girl minding her own business, when a guy maybe old enough to be her father starts hitting on her. After she turns him down, he sticks around to taunt her of her idiotic decision to turn him down. Yeah, who many of you would have been “nice” during that situation.
So stop being self righteous, get of your high horse and congratulate the girl!
I think its pretty clear that Joe is in the wrong. He should have let it slide afer she said she wasn’t interested, the chances of her changing her mind were slim.
When he started persistently messaging with no reply that was ‘creepy’ and then he basically said that her life will be nothing without him in it, making him the one being ‘pretentious’.
Also when she asked “seriously?” she could have simply been making sure there wasn’t a misunderstanding or he could have been fraped or trolling or anything.
@goober – hitting the nail on the head buddy.
@chompchomp – no one believes that you are the slightest bit attractive and that you are jealous and angry that you never get “hit on” go fuck yourself cuz no one else wants to.