Monday, January 10, 2011

Locked Into Love

previous post: Background Checks!

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32 Comments

  1. I prefer waking up alone in jail.

  2. Mass cuts the string off his “soap on a rope” in jail.
    STEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRR FTW!

  3. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    “Fair is fair”? These crazy chain statuses are getting more and more annoying. While we are at it, what the fuck do you gain if someone copies and pastes?
    I saw a really stupid religious one

    When you carry the Bible, Satan gets a headache…..When you open it, he collapses….When he sees you reading it he faints….When he sees you living it, he flees……And just when your about to re post this, he’ll try to discourage you. I JUST DEFEATED HIM!!!! Copy and re post……Any takers?HAHAHA DEVIL!!!

  4. I agree, Buns, but this one is less offensive to me than most, maybe because it allows for a little creativity and humor. The ones which require you simply to cut and paste because you will die/go to hell/be uncool if you don’t, drive me nucking futs.

  5. They teach you to draw in jail?

  6. Dukey, are you FB friends with Fargis?

  7. Does FTW mean fuck the world?

  8. @7, it means “for the win”

  9. hpcan, from what you’ve told us recently, that acronym could be modified to describe you…

    FTW = Fabulously Titted Woman.

  10. hpcan is a girl?

    Nichole’s dude’s obviously become a flower during his incarceration. What the hell, can that card get any mushier?!

  11. @word, I didn’t know the disclosure of one’s cup size was a prerequisite of this site. Or were you just feeling generous with your information that day, hpcan?

  12. I thought FTW meant “Fear the Wombat.”

  13. Hey, learning to draw is more constructive than embracing Mohammed, Jesus, or whatever the fuck you imagine will make parole boards or inmates like you.

    word, I don’t have all the links at the moment and am too lazy to search again (google yoink and lamebook and you shouldn’t have to search far)

    But here is a link in which alordslums called the true yoink the false: http://www.lamebook.com/pair-problems/

    Meatspace requires much from me now so I fear I must depart this cyberspace indefinitely. Until next time.

  14. siren, it isn’t a prerequisite (perhaps it should be), but please, do feel free to disclose.

  15. Oh, and thanks, Pep. I forgot I asked you about that.

  16. Brandon – ‘Morning cunt, open wide.’

    The first one has to be the easiest ‘Where’s Wally’ I’ve ever seen. Their really dumbing it down for the ‘retard’ generation aren’t they?

  17. What a sweet photo at #1. Surely one to show the grandkids.

  18. One thing prison teaches you is that ass-rape hurts, that and drawing bunny rabbits. Both of which will serve you well later in life.

    It has become apparent that I have missed some truly epic comments section revelations over the weekend, can anyone give me the general gist of things as my eyes have not yet returned to their normal state.

  19. Ok let me see. There was …. worst things to throw up, word and mass romance, name stealing and more name stealing, to beat or not to beat your children, oh and sweet tits.

  20. Worst thing to throw up – Your lungs followed by your ringpiece
    word & mass romance – It’ll never happen, it’s the never-ending dance
    Name stealing – Fuuuuuuck me, that AGAIN
    Beating children – A good spanking never did me any harm, quite the opposite in fact
    Sweet tits – goddamit

    Much obliged curly, old fruit.

  21. well bugger me…tits, throwing up and beating wee ones….it’s a trifecta

  22. @Paranoid, are you sure it hasn’t done you any harm? No paranoia and anger issues?

  23. Moi? Thought I had hidden my sociopathic tendencies quite well.

    I jest, my outpourings on this hallowed site are the very antithesis of my true persona.

    Now, let me hear more of these sweet tits that were mentioned.

  24. When you use those big words I find it hard to do the accent!

    So jellica and dina have sweet tits. God I hope you appreciate all this work I’m doing for you.

  25. I think God would approve ah tell thee (is that better?)

  26. God would approve ….. ugh (though I can hear the accent perfectly now thanks).

  27. Actually one or two people in prison can draw, they make cards for other prioners to pass off as there own, they are paid in blow jobs and butt sex and what have you. tricky little prisoners ;)

  28. Why do women insist on dating losers in jail? Seems like that would be a deal breaker to me.

  29. nick: “women” in general don’t – “SOME women” do (just like I’m sure some men like incarcerated women. Or double amputees.), and I suppose it’s the “bad boy” aspect that some women are attracted to – also, they’ll know where the boyfriend is at all times. ;)
    Also, a lot of women thin they can change some of these guys, especially murderers and such.

    I prefer my men not behind bars and not wearing prison uniforms. The cuffs and chains however, are up for discussion. :P

  30. Also, jail seems to teach you to trace Disney images more so than draw. Drawn “in hand”, my pale white ass.

  31. My husband is in prison (not jail..) and so far he’s gotten an associates degree, sent me countless pictures he’s drawn, and he’s been very proactive through it all. Some girls can’t do it.. usually the young ones (like in the pictures) haha.

    *waits for the bashing*

  32. No real bash, but you realize jail and prison are really the same thing, right?

    And that degree won’t mean shit once he figures out that the concept of “served your debt to society” (and thus you’re supposed to be treated like anyone else) is bollocks.

    You never truly escape your past.

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