Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Just… LOST

previous post: Tuesday TypOHs!



  1. BEN
    Now tell me, who doesn’t want Gregory as a father?

  2. I can’t believe how retarded some people are. NO, they didn’t all die in the plane crash in season one. They all died at various times in life, be it when they were old, on the island, whatever…But they met up in that place because those were the people who meant the most to them in the end. Jesus christ how can people be so dumb.

  3. Mick is one dumb motherfucker. They didn’t all die in season 1. Why do people keep thinking this? It wasn’t hard to understand. He should stick to reality TV so he doesn’t feel so confused and enraged.

  4. TGIO

  5. six season rick roll. Ha! :)

  6. Thank you boomstick, I have no idea why people keep saying that. It’s making me mad…I know it’s just a TV show, but did you guys see the same thing I did?

  7. How can someone get mad about the finale to a show they admittedly only watched a few times? Why would you even waste your time watching it? Mick sucks at life.

  8. They didn’t die in Season 1 episode 1, anybody who thinks that is the people who, like this guy only watched the few episodes that he felt like, if you tuned in and fell in love with the characters then you’d realise the true story about life after death and life. corr, what gays

  9. I’m one of the people posting in this. Let me just say that Mick is more awesome than all of you combined. :)

    And that Ashley chick, you should have seen the retarded shit she posted after this. She dedicated her life to a TV show.

    And PS Andythrax, Mick IS gay. At least bi. Who’s the smart guy now?

  10. Ashes to Ashes did it better.

  11. That’s what happened in the finale? F*ckin horsesh*t! Thank FSM that I stopped after the third season.

  12. I watched every episode of Lost and I think that they SHOULD have died on the plane. F this mysterious island of magic bullshit. COME ON.

    Mass coma, that is what I want to believe. And once they died on the island they died in their coma; the people who got off the island? F them, their plane crashed and they died too.

    All the people who weren’t on 815 never existed and that was why they weren’t in the church. Penny was a figment.


  13. I never watched Lost, but I was thinking of borrowing the DVDs and check it out. Now I guess I don’t need to. Thanks for the *spoiler alert* notice, Lamebook.

  14. prolefeedprocessor

    Six-season rickroll. Made. My. Day.

  15. F Juliette too. Her pursed lips pissed me off.

  16. Buwahahahah. Gregory…you…..are…..awesome! Made me laugh out loud! Hahaha.

    As for lost, no, they all didn’t die when the plane crashed. The island was real life. It’s pretty easy to figure that out. They also TELL you that directly in the show. Anyways, season 6 sucked and so did the finale.

  17. I never saw a single episode of Lost either. Seems like there’s a bunch of confusion on there..

  18. Lost went downhill after Season 2, although I watched from beginning to end. The finale was horrible.

    And yea..like other people are saying…they didn’t die in season 1. The last 10 minutes of the show lay everything out…it’s pretty simple to understand.

  19. I’ve only taken a couple basic art classes in my life, but on weekends I like to go to museums and look at the paintings and call them horseshit so everyone can see how opinionated I am. Does that make me awesome too?

  20. No, I think it makes you gay for taking art classes.

  21. screw Lost. who cares?

    Gregory has to be the coolest dad on the planet: “but after getting tired of waiting in line behind a bunch of assholes everyone just ends up with the fatties in the lazy river!! LMAO!!

  22. Now that the entire show has been ruined for me I definitely will not be watching it.

  23. I know this is lame but I stopped watching Lost after season 1 when they killed that blue eyed steaming hot Boone. There, I get it off my chest.

  24. lol

    Lost is ghey.

  25. Ummm, melissa? Not too perceptive when it comes to sarcasm, are we? That last post was not based on fact, merely meant to illustrate a point, which apparently went over your head. Besides, if you’ve never had to take art in school then you must not haven made it to 1st grade yet.

  26. Iron_E, please explain to your distressed friend Mick that they DID NOT DIE in the original plane crash. I’m incredibly annoyed right now that your friend Mick is so stupid and will only sleep tonight if he is informed of such. Thank you!


  28. Ray: Not too perceptive when it comes to the lulz, are we?

  29. Dude got the ending completely wrong. Maybe if he hadn’t only wasted “a few nights” on it, he may grasp it better instead of looking like an ignorant retard.

  30. Mick is a moron. It’s really a shame the strength of his idiocy is obscuring the best part of this post, which is Gregory’s brilliant analogy.

  31. Wow…all this over Lost??? I abandoned that show after the 5th episode due to abc baiting me with an “All New Lost” and then showing me the same re-run for the next 3 weeks…

  32. For the record, the Lost finale was indeed crap. I watched every episode, and the only loose end it tied up was the one that was created at the beginning of the final season. Everything else was glossed over. None of this changes the fact that Mick is a retard.

  33. Gregory may be right, but for now I’m going to desperately try to stay out of the lazy river.

    I also have never watched Lost, kinda glad I haven’t. Everyone seem so worked up and angry. Scary.

  34. Riiight, melissa. We’re all indebted to you for gracing us with your incredible comedic genius.

  35. NEXT!!!

    I’m done with the Lost whining.

    Where’s Ben when you need him.

  36. Lost was teh suck!

  37. I wish Lamebook would’ve separated these two entries. Gregory’s awesome analogy is being overshadowed by an idiot.
    Seriously…that analogy was hilarious!!

  38. Mick…
    Now that is a name I haven’t seen or heard in ages.

  39. Mick = Ben = Frodo = herpes

  40. boomstick #3, hang on there, reality TV does makes me confused and enraged, so watching crap like that doesn’t make me feel any different to watching a crap mainstream TV series.

    Watching reality TV is a form of torture. I watch it on occasion for the reason I see it as my dress rehearsal for hell.

  41. I love lost because it sucked. It was such a brilliant show… complete and utter absolute unfettered horseshit. What a loss.

  42. PraetorianXVIII

    Thanks for the fucking spoiler alert, Lamebook, you cockbags.

  43. lol at the morons insisting the Island was “real” – because if it was, then the finale is an even BIGGER slap in the face because they managed to not explain ANYTHING AT ALL. Hilarious.

  44. In case the dozen previous comments saying so weren’t enough, this post doesn’t contain any Lost spoilers, because Mick didn’t even understand the ending.

  45. ohh man, yessss.
    Robbie’s dad FTW! “Love is like a water park”?? Pure.Brilliance.

    And I never bothered watching a single episode of LOST, but I understand that most fans were upset with the ending…
    It couldn’t have been any worse than the utterly bullsh*t ending of ‘Roseanne’, though. Right, guys? Right?

  46. Mick is definitely Frodo.


  47. And if you’re bitching about Lamebook spoiling the ending: did you plan on avoiding the internet and all your Lostie friends until you were done catching up on 6 seasons? COME ON.

  48. PraetorianXVIII

    I had no idea what happened at the end until I read this posting, spinach. So yes. Do with that what you will.

  49. Is any fan of any show ever happy with the way a series ends? I don’t think so, particularly when a series goes on for some time.
    People have different opinions about finales, but for the most part, no one is ever fully satisfied.

    Try and think of one long running series you enjoyed, and were completely happy with the way it ended. It’s a tough call. I was a “Sopranos” zealot, I kind of liked the ending, most didn’t.

    Bottom line, you can’t please everyone.

  50. But when “Dr 90210″ takes his last breath, I’m sure everyone will cheer.

  51. Gregory is my guru.

  52. Word,

    Newhart was on the air for two years longer than Lost, and managed to end with a brilliant twist in what many consider one of the all-time great television moments. Maybe it’s different for a comedy like Newhart, but its last episode is very well-liked.

  53. @Dawnstar

    omg, yes… that series finale of Roseanne is one of the worst in the history of tv. I hate all of those “part or most or all of this series was a dream or a story or a something” endings. I’ll take a mediocre Seinfeld ending over that, any day.

    My dad always told me that having sex with a fat girl was like riding a moped… lots of fun, but you still don’t want your friends knowing you do it.

  54. @Word

    I liked the Saved by the Bell finale, where they graduated high school… and the “other” Saved by the Bell finale, where Zach and Kelly got married. Oh, and the other Saved by the Bell finale, where Zach said goodbye to Stacey Curosey, because Summer was ending and they had to go back to school.

  55. OMG lamebook you absolute bastard! thanks for ruining it for me!

  56. PraetorianXVIII

    The Wonder Years had the best ending, and it wasn’t even what everybody had expected, but was fitting somehow all the same

  57. mcowles! I just had a little flash back. Not sure if I liked it or not. xoxo for Slater!

  58. Lost was one helluva long con. But calling it a 6 season rick-roll is a bit harsh. Only the last four seasons sucked.

  59. @mcowles
    Was I the moped in your reference this weekend? If so, I’m pretty pissed off at you right now. Oh, but wait…you already told your friends….

  60. @Prae

    I remember the Wonder Years finale… wasn’t that where Winnie moved away and Harry Connick Jr. reconciled with Kevin’s mom and it turned out his dad had died from a heart attack a few years back, but Kevin’s mom had become an author and was writing about what she wished the last 3 years were like? And his brother gets shot down in a helicopter, while leaving vietnam and the rest of the cast ends up in jail for some stupid “local” law confusion thing?

  61. @dawnstar

    You are no moped. You are the Harley Davidson that you rev up super loud so that everyone hears it and knows how awesome your ride is.

    Or something less crude…. and maybe something that doesn’t require a kick start.

  62. 6 season rick roll, haaaha!

  63. @mcowles

    hahaha, REDEMPTION! Well played, good sir.

  64. yeah…i appreciate the warning. but whatever. this post was still chock full of win.

  65. “Six feet under” probably had the best ending I’ve seen in the drama series genre.

    “Will and Grace”, and “Frasier”, were not too bad in the comedy one.

    “Sex and the City”, fuck that.

  66. mccowles, you’re right on about the “Seinfeld” finale.

    The last 2 seasons lost their mojo after Larry David’s departure.
    A couple of bril episodes in there, but not many, regardless, I will love the “Sein” forever.

    “Saved by the bell” was one I never really watched, I might look into it.

  67. Regardless of how it ends, the end of a favorite tv series disappoints simply because the story’s over. You can’t be totally satisfied. It would be like saying you’re satisfied with how a breakup happens, when you didn’t want it to end. No amount of closure will make you feel great about it. Although… a breakup is actually worse, because a tv has always been a terrible sex partner.

  68. PraetorianXVIII

    I don’t remember all THAT happening. His dad dies later of a heart problem, Winnie goes off to Paris for art school and comes back to meet Kevin and his wife and first son. I think his brother took over the furniture business and his mother became a businesswoman or something. I have no idea where you got the rest of that stuff?

  69. I like Lost, and despite what I’m reading here, I’ve actually seen quite a few fans that completely back up the ending & found it to be “brilliant”. The ending was showing the “results” of the long-running “Science VS. Faith” debate on the show. Faith won.

    I hated that it didn’t answer all my questions, but it was still a beautiful ending. The best way I can put it is, my heart goes “Awww, so nice (and cheesy)”, but my brain is going “No, no, no!! You didn’t answer this, or that!!”

    FYI for all of you saying “Thanks for the spoiler alert, I won’t bother watching it now!” I watched the entire series in the past six months (friends were urging me to, lol) and I don’t regret the time I spent watching it. At the end of the day, it’s still just a damn TV show, so who the hell cares if all the questions weren’t answered? Isn’t that like real life? =P

  70. CommentsAtLarge

    I’m of the opinion that a crappy finale is better then none at all. I’ve liked my share of shows that just got cancelled and never got to wrap anything up. The fact that a finale leaves room for interpretation is kind of cool. It leaves the viewer with a bit of influence over how a story they were invested in ended.

    Crappy finales usually irk me just because it shows a lack of effort on the production’s part.

  71. @Prae, sorry… I wasn’t talking much about the Wonder Years there… Winnie leaving was about all that I was referencing. The Harry Connick Jr. part was from Will and Grace’s series finale, the dad dying and the “author” part were from Roseanne’s, the helicopter thing was from MASH’s series finale and hte local law confusion was from Seinfeld.

    Maybe my joke was too subtle (or too lame)… would it have helped if I said “and his sister ran to the airport to tell Rachel that she loved her before Rachel left NYC forever”? or “And they all had one last beer at Cheers”?

    *fade to black*

  72. badasscooldude

    FFS, http://i49.tinypic.com/dhbr0m.png

  73. Your joke was sweet, mc.

  74. And I don’t mean sugary, I mean cool.

    I’ll fade to black as well.

  75. I completely agree with Bry and some others. The ending was entirely appropriate for what the whole show was about – faith vs science, and that people are meant to speculate about the ‘mysteries’ which were left unresolved. It was certainly a better finale than going through all the questions from series’ back like ‘How did Walt communicate to the Swan computer?!?!?!?!’

    As for historyprof, so many people explain it to you and you still don’t understand. The ending was one of the most explained things in the whole show, they practically spelt it out for you. If you actually are a history professor, you are an embarrassment to us all.

  76. agreed, mcowles.

    I l’dol.

  77. @mcowles: M*A*S*H was set in the Korean War, not Vietnam. I thought you were referencing that show, but the whole Vietnam thing threw me off. It was basically a thinly veiled criticism of Vietnam, but the actual setting was Korea.

    @grosjean: The show was not really about faith vs. science until at least season 4. Before that, it was about a crazy island with a lot of mysteries. Of course, even if you think the faith vs. science angle was intended from the beginning, the show’s resolution is basically that faith is good and science is bad which is really not what we need in these times increasingly marked by violent religious conflicts.

    I didn’t like that the finale was essentially 2.5 hours of beating us over the head with religion (or generic “spirituality” to avoid offending any particular religion). The show started out as a fairly promising mystery with strong sci-fi elements, and deteriorated into religious allegory. Some people liked that it did that, I hated it.

  78. I just watched the finale to some show on the Food Network. The pot roast was dry! What kind of shit is that?

    And while we’re on the subject–what are you, Starbuck? GODDAMMIT, WHAT ARE YOU?

    Stupid television, ruining my life.

    I wonder what’s on.

  79. @Sensible

    Ummm, but Kevin’s brother tried to get into the Vietnam war, but was rejected for having flat feet… or something… I don’t really know, ok, sorry.


    Fixed!!!! Magical Asterisks!

  80. @Sensible

    Science vs. Faith has always been an important theme in Lost. The Season 2 premiere was even called “Man of Science, Man of Faith.”

  81. Mick was incorrect. They did not die in the plane crash in the Pilot episode. Everything that happened throughout all of the seasons was real.

  82. I never watched Lost, I always thought it was horseshit. However I couldn’t be helped by being harassed constantly throughout these 6 past years by friends, acquantainces and family that just NEEDED to talk about this crappy ass show. I ALWAYS KNEW it would end like this purgatory ass crap, and it doesn’t matter if they died in the first episode, the last, the second, the third. It’s the same shit with a different coating. So the underlined message is different, who cares if they were together because it was some purgatory hippy crap about being with the people you care the most. It’s still purgatory with a smoke monster.

    So to all those who were faithful these past 6 years with a crappy show they made up as they went, tough times, you lost 6 years but your life didn’t end. Move on, and make sure to never watch any series again because they are all a waste of time, plot lines are not majestic, they are just a ploy to suck your life and money, artists don’t make up the storyline, men with suits and polls do.

    To all those who think the tiny difference of death as they went instead of the first episode and all that “you spend time with your loved ones and they all loved each other” crap, makes a difference at all. Grats! You were hoaxed and can’t think outside the box, but don’t panic your favorite 6 year old marketing scheme has comes to an end, I am sure the next sugar coated unoriginal “same old same old” crap is being thought of as we speak! So… hold your sox and get ready for the next big crap around the corner!!!

    That is all.

  83. Wow, what is it about Lost that’s bringing out the worst in people? Thanks for informing us that you don’t care about the show, I was really on the edge of my seat wondering.

    Meanwhile, I’ve had something fun and interesting to look forward to every week for the last six years. Why is that supposed to make me feel snookered, again?

  84. Jesus, Rodo, pull your dick out of the meat grinder, it’s making you cranky!

    Science vs. Faith is one of the few unsolved debates left worth having. And entertainment for the sake of such a bad thing either, even if it does try to play with those themes. Who cares what answer they give or don’t give? You’ll never know if it’s the right one anyhow. It’s just interesting to look at.

  85. Sorry-
    *entertainment for the sake of … isn’t such a bad thing

    The keyboard was bogarting my coffee again this morn.

  86. Well, I only watched the first 10 minutes of the first episode and I LOST interest pretty quick. If you guys want a show with a good story line that isnt confusing, I suggest watching Dexter. It has a CLEAR storyline unlike lost. I have never seen so many people get so ticked off about a single show other than American Idol GO KRIS ALLEN!!! … oh wait that was last season. lol But seriously, watch Dexter, the first two seasons are streaming on Netflix.

  87. Mick’s a fucking idiot. Way to toally misunderstand the finale of your ‘favourite’ show and then be a whiny bitch about it.

    Kinda wish I’d gotten here earlier so that I’m not comment 87 after everyone else has already pointed this out :P

  88. Lol Miss, meat grinders are a great time! I’m not really cranky, just telling it as it is.

    I’m just glad this show ended, it was quite annoying having everyone else around you at school first, then job, family events, BBQs, you name it, always talking about this and trying to get you interested in it as well. Whenever I’d say I didn’t watch LOST I’d have to endure 10 minutes of “OH MY GOD HOW CAN YOU NOT!!!” plus recaps of what happened in every show up to that moment, until I’d finally put my foot down in a very negative way expressing that I didn’t care. I never watched LOST but I knew what happened in every season, I was socially spoonfed that corny ass show, much like second hand smokers end up with smoke in their lungs.

    Now I am extra happy that the ending didn’t live up to most people’s expectations because I get to say “I told you so”… being right is fucking awesome. So no… I am not cranky, I am the opposite of cranky, I am happy this show ended, I am happy I was right all along. Take that consumer society!

  89. #23 I agree :)

    I loved LOST but really the last season sucked balls, I was really let down by how they chose to end it.

  90. To everyone complaining about the finale being spoiled: Quit bitching, it’s clear from the title and the beginning of the posts that it was going to be about the finale. If you didn’t want to know then you could have STOPPED READING.

  91. MonkeyCMonkeyDo

    I’m super glad I didn’t watch Lost…

  92. The title says it all.

  93. I actually watched every episode and also felt that they were saying the whole time on the island didn’t happen and they all died in the original plane crash. Frankly, the idea that the flash sideways was a purgatory really doesn’t mean shit to me. The whole island mystery was never explained in any way shape or form. I personally did not feel this was a show about faith vs science. I think it was a bunch of writers that could not dig themselves of the giant hole they dug by not knowing what the show was about when they started writing it.

    I don’t feel that anything was clearly spelled out about “everything that happened is real” and all that bullshit. For god’s sake he was hearing that shit from a dead guy. Gee, that’s believable! Nothing about the island itself was every really explained and I for one am disgusted with how it ended.

  94. On a side note, I also thought that Greg’s analogy was priceless, and feel bad it totally got overshadowed by fucking LOST.

    #1 FTW. I laughed out loud reading that.

  95. Mikey Mike, thanks for totally ruining that finale for me. Fucking pot roast!

  96. People get really heated up about TV shows. Makes me glad I don’t watch TV.

    Gregory’s comment was great though!

  97. Lost? Meh. I’m still mourning the shitty manner in which Firefly ended. Now THAT had something interesting to say about Faith v. Reason.

  98. If I ever see Firefly again, Mal will become malteaser in my head. I will be disappointed if he doesn’t say “lol”.

  99. Exactly! but firefly wont be coming back any time soon with both Nathan Fillion and Morena Baccarin being major characters in ABC shows.

  100. I watched the finale again last night and it is spelled out no less than THREE separate times that everything on the island DEFINITELY HAPPENED IN REAL LIFE. People are idiots and if they can’t follow LOSTs last episode, god knows how they got through the whole series.

  101. Paranoid Android

    Never has a thread been more suited to the war-cry of ‘Ben’ given that the Ben in Lost was a whiny tosspot who wanted to be first.

    I’m disappointed people. I really am.

  102. @Paranoid Android: I thought that. Every time somebody in here said Ben, the nerd in me expected a Ben Linus joke.

  103. Malteser’s gone down in my esimation for that comment.

    Iron_E, you’re lame. Almost at ‘thejetblast’ level of lame.

  104. I want to slap Mick in the face. They DID NOT DIE until the final episode. He must be mentally retarded.

  105. rockinghorsefly

    Gregory is brilliant.

    @mcowles – “My dad always told me that having sex with a fat girl was like riding a moped… lots of fun, but you still don’t want your friends knowing you do it.” – also brilliant.

    I am glad that I don’t own a television, and have never seen Lost.

  106. christopherawesome

    By the way I don’t think a *spoiler alert* is required when what he said isn’t at all what happened.

  107. i enjoyed the few episodes of lost that i did watch, for the humour and the stories behind each character. but i mean, the show had a lot of fantasy in it, so i dont think the finale should have been that disappointing, based on what ive read about how it ended. I could never get into the show because all of the unanswered questions were just too much.

  108. i do think a spoiler alert is required, because the lamebook post leads you to the comments which correct the mistake made in the post, thus revealing what happened…ive always been able to avoid spoiling things for other people, even years after the story/show was released/aired. it’s not that difficult to do

  109. So the Lost finale was even lamer than the BSG finale? Glad I got bored of Lost and tuned out sometime in season 4, then.

    Gregory is my hero.

  110. Feel free to spoiler this one! For fuck’s sake…

  111. Oh dear, what makes the second one so much worse is that Mick completely misunderstood/ misinterpreted the season finale.

  112. Dukey Smoothy Buns


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