Thursday, November 12, 2009

John, Joe and His Job


previous post: Stone Cold Shame



  1. what a bitch.

  2. This is why Chaz doesn’t seriously date and the reason he will never consider marriage.

  3. Peta’s quite the cunt.

  4. Jesus what the hell is going on in this thread? Joe needs to get rid of damaged goods QUICKLY. Peta (seriously?) sounds like a proper mental bitch.

  5. Wow. Morons.

  6. Wheyyyyyy

  7. According to Peta, it is better to have him not have a job and possibly end up on the streets then to have him being an asshole after working his ass off all day.

    Bitch is crazy.

  8. ha!FIRST:P

  9. 8th?

  10. is going on here?

  11. I don’t think it’s possible to get the full story from 5 facebook comments and pass judgement, but the fact that this shit ends up on facebook in the first place says a lot about them.

    P.S. this site needs to learn how to set the fucking tab order.

  12. Peta’s last sentence summed it up. “this is so fucked.” I believe that was also the first occasion she spelled four words in a row correctly.

  13. Sweet baby Jesus :D

  14. Hmm so the bitch wants this: 1. Joe to quit his job because it seems to take up too much time 2. She has her ex and daughter living with them 3. she doesn’t want to compromise on anything on her part but wants him to do everything she wants

    What does this all equal-> LEAVE the bitch, you don’t need to be a baby daddy to a kid that isn’t yours, wife a woman with 0 kids even if shes divorced.

  15. Is anyone else getting turned off by that ad of pamela anderson?

  16. love that two of John’s ‘friends’ ‘like’ that he’s a cunt!

  17. CHAZ-

    I can feel your pain

  18. I am completely incapable of reading that.


  19. this whole post is a fail. People dont really speak like this.

  20. I think Peta is a mean bitch and Joe deserves it for being such a cunt.
    She actually choose her ex over him on Facebook!

  21. Peta : I hate how you get so angry when you provide for me and my child, his dad, and his g/f who live with us. It hurts me so much to think you could take that burden and not be ok with it and work a stressful paying job while they feed off of us. Joe you are so selfish!

  22. That was a translation of Peta’s words into English =P

  23. I think these people are from the UK. Anyone else noticed people from the UK garbling english beyond recognition in online forums and facebook?

  24. I don’t think the kid is hers. “He has a kid with him.” I think it might be an ex or someone she had hooked up with at one point, but the kid belongs to John and Christine. And she doesn’t want to throw them out on the street with a kid.

  25. I hate Peta.

    She can’t spell.

  26. I think Christine is Johns’ kid.
    Having some dude and a kid living at an ex’s house would be tough, if there was no trust in your relationship, this relationship seems doomed anyways.

  27. Are people really that dumb that can’t figure out which type of conversations are suitable for wall postings and which should be in private emails? It is not a hard concept to figure out. And the spelling is ridiculous.

  28. Wow.

    I love how they both said, let’s talk about this at home in private, then immediately restarted the whole thing.

    Also, she expanded what was a fairly cryptic and nonsensical status then told HIM off for telling everyone their shit.


  29. ugh… right on Peta. Don’t even get me started on Jim.

  30. This Peta chick totally ruined my boner time.

  31. BWT = British White Trash

  32. Why do ppl choose to write like this? it took me too much time to understand her way of writing :/

  33. It took me way too long to realize that “Peta” was a person and not an organization..

  34. @Truff
    LOL At first I was going to say “what makes you assume they’re British?”, then I looked at it again. BWT indeed.
    (I am British by the way)

  35. Jermaine Beckford


  36. ok:
    1. Maybe Joe is an escort or a stripper a night? Or maybe he shovels fish guts and Peta is embarrased. Or maybe his job is actually fun for him ( a bartender or something) and Peta does not like that.

    2. Jon- some jobless guy, who is good looking, and some sort of Peta’s friend. I don’t think the kid (who I believe is Christine) is Peta’s. He prob is home all day with Peta and Joe doesn’t like that.

    3. Since Peta is annoyed with Joe, she prob sleeping with John. How is it this John guy has NO WHERE else to go? If he has a kid the state will give you assistance.

    4. Joe and Peta- Both complete morons for “communicating” their problems through facebook. WTF

    5. Possible Assumption- The 3 are related somehow- brother, sister, cousin, and they live in Kansas

  37. Holy fuck………people are actually going to analyze this and try to decipher the reason they are arguing?

  38. I think Peta is so mad because Joe bought her a fur coat at some stage.

  39. haaaahahaha. throw in some kind of drug reference and it’s an irvine welsh novel! except for the brilliant, gripping narrative aspect of it. but i mean, plot’s pretty much all there. love it.

  40. I would be upset and lash out at my boyfriend too if my name was PETA.

  41. These two need to be removed from the gene pool. ASAP.

  42. I just realised 2 people clicked like on the fact he is a cunt.

  43. @Frank
    yeah, at least Americans have the courtosy to do it in real life as well :-P

    I think people should have to take basic language and common sense tests before being allowed to reproduce.

  44. Why is it ever okay to type like that?

  45. It’s like a British version of the movie “Idiocracy”.

  46. It’s official, I’m naming my kid Aclu.

  47. @44

    Thank you for saying that. Nothing crawls up my ass and sets camp there more than idiots who type like this. These aren’t innocent typos. This is intellectual terrorism.

  48. I like turtles.

  49. @ratcoon
    dumb moment… aclu?

  50. @Penny Lane

    I could not agree more, I frikken can’t stand people that use n as and, no as know, cm (never saw that one before) as seem, etc. Those extra few letters won’t kill you.

    I can somewhat understand why you would abbreviate words in text messages, in the past typing long words was a bitch and it saves you money, but really on facebook or any other internet related place, there is no reason. Besides, if people type like this on facebook, I doubt they would do much better on school/work stuff.

  51. Yup. I’m a middle school teacher. The kids actually write things like “IDK” as answers in their work, and say “O-M-G” aloud. It’s disgusting.

  52. As much as I love reading the lamebook posts, some of the comments you guys leave makes my day. Thank fuck for lamebook helping me get through the work day.

  53. @52

    Seems like Joe isn’t the only one that should quit his job.

  54. I find it funny Joe stopped for a moment, and then added another comment instead of waiting.

  55. Is Peta retarded? Of course he would choose a job over a girlfriend. Unless he’s just a whipped pussy boyfriend. Must be hard knowing your girlfriend has bigger balls than you. And that her name is Peta.

  56. I always find it kind of weird when there’s a couple and one of them types normally and the other one types like they slammed their face into the keyboard and pressed enter.

  57. @jooks
    I actually heard a girl saying ‘lol’ like it was a word, not not loll. Like, “O.M.G. I actually lol’d at that”. If it weren’t for those pesky laws against violence I would have punched her.

    “types like they slammed their face into the keyboard and pressed enter.” O.M.G. I just lol’d

    Oh, the same.

  58. *shame

    FARK mcfarkerson

  59. Myyy braaiinn huuurrts from trying to read that. Really, I think my eyes actually crossed at some point.

    And yes, BWT. No offense to our lovely Brits – there’s plenny o’ WT here in Merrica, too.

  60. maybe im crazy but isnt peta some type of food? snarf snarf

  61. @snarf
    Close (in the sense that it’s animal related) – PETA is an organisation called People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals.

    I’m also seeing a tin of dog food in my mind’s eye, but I don’t think that that is the actual name.

  62. of course i just realised that you didn’t mention animals, but that’s what i assumed!

  63. ha i was thinking of pita not peta
    my bad snarf snarf

  64. LMAO!

  65. what an over dramatic, crazy woman.

  66. Anybody else wondering what job Joe works at that is causing all this stress?

  67. no matter how i turn my head i can’t see anything but smileys when i look at the last comment

  68. I bet Peta is fucking smokin’ hot.

  69. Ha! I went to school with a chick called Peta, and she was batshit insane. I used to provoke her (cos I’m an arsehole) and watch her flip the tables over, go off her head, and run screaming down the corridor.
    Also, @ nor’n monkey, I say ‘lol’, as in rhymes with ‘doll’ *Hides behind punch-proof internet hat*
    But I say it quite drily and never replace a real laugh (at something funny) with it.

  70. Lamebook is great, but I am getting sick of decoding this illiterate shite.

  71. @Leverhundar
    Will let you off… ;)
    These girls were serious! It was like listening to them talking in code.

  72. Man, pure white trash. I thank my luck I’m not these people.

  73. bahahahaha i know these people and it ened up on here bahahahahahahahahahah

  74. This is missing a vital element – why hasn’t John got anything to say, via Facebook, about the situation?!

  75. As the age old adage goes: all women are whores.

  76. I appreciate the summaries here in the comments, because I couldn’t understand a damn word of the actual FB “conversation.”

    This whole exchange is a textbook example of “too stupid to live.”

  77. They sound like a bunch of hill billys!

    p.s did anyone understand what the f***k Peta was talking????????
    stupid hillbillys hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaah

  78. @23 Frank

    This conversation is by people from the UK, I can tell as I find the same speech so irritating, I am from a place part of the UK but not from England thank god, please dont judge me. Why oh why have this conversation on the internet, the words escape me, the correct term in UK speak is ‘pond-life’ for this calibre of person.

  79. What the hell’s going on in that conversation? I don’t think they’re even speaking English.

  80. i know these people and JOE is a security guard and they are from OZ! hahahahahahahahahah

  81. I can’t tell what’s worse: people that tYpE LiKE tHIs with some eB0nIc type shit thrown in or people from across the pond that say “wif.”

  82. @nor’n monkey

    aclu = American Civil Liberties Union

    Just another not for profit organization, like PETA

    Btw, I think “cm” instead of “seem” is in the top 3 of “most annoying abbreviations in existence”.

  83. I didn’t think 12 year olds had jobs.

    Both losers!

  84. @80 – yeah, I suspected Australians. I think Australians provide the lifeblood of lamebook.

  85. I cannot even make sense of this one. there should be a literacy yest to getting a FB account. just saying.


  87. is Joe and male hooker??? I still dont get it.

  88. literacy test. I meant btw.

  89. I’m 23 years old and I still have no idea when typing like a fucking retard became popular.

  90. My head feels like I’ve been fucked in the ear with a big black dildo… Peta is a Slunt

  91. What?

  92. Nice to see a good old British post though, for once!

  93. I cry anytime I see a passing reference to “the kids” for it means that they breeded in their continuous quest to destroy the English language.

  94. This is so unable to be read, you are right candy blackmail, it really is a tragedy that they bred.

  95. Matt after attempting three times to read your post, I hope you don’t “bred” either.

  96. ‘Bred’ is correct. But I think Matt was trying to rhyme or something? :)

  97. Never have too people been more made for each other in the history of the world!

  98. Right on, Noam!

  99. I thought Peta was a common Australian name..?

    I’m guessing Christine is either a sister or a friend, BF is John, who is living there with the pair of them, along with a slew of kids. Sounds like a commune….. If I was Joe, i’d probably be spending every waking moment at work too.

    I can’t believe these are adults.

  100. Christine in the “child wif him”. Peta’s probably banging John whilst Joe is at his dreadful job so I’m not sure why she want’s him to quit.

  101. why on earth do people talk like peta? it really gets annoying… some acronyms like WTF and LOL are fine… but WHAT IN THE HELL IS ‘gud’…for those who dont understand sarcasm, i understand gud should be taken as good… but i dont initially pronounce gud like good in my head… it comes out like its spelled… and then i just get pissed…

  102. unfortunately your an imbecile then as what she is doing is using only phonetically relevant parts of words and if they seem at odds with reason replacing them all together.
    for example when she type gud it is more phonetically correct than good because good should sound like gued. its just the english language is very complicated and part of the reason for its success and beauty is its adaptability in grammar, slang and general language. petra should not be ridiculed for her method of comunication, you should be for your pompous attitude towards something so unpretentious as the english language, the current used form a raped and much changed jumble compared to how it used to be hundreds of years ago. change happens, get over it.

  103. Actually, ‘good’ is the best way to spell it for correct annunciation. ‘Gud’ would have a similar sound to the “u” in ‘gutter’ or ‘udder.’

    It looks to me that Peta isn’t just using phonetically relevant parts of words as much as she’s just simply being lazy, or maybe doesn’t even know better. This is exemplified through changing the world ‘the’ to ‘tha,’ and many other things.

  104. @Matt
    Actually, while I’d never type ‘phonetically’ (seriously, that word pisses me off – if you actually wrote phonetically it would NOT look anything like that and would involve a lot of symbols), I DO pronounce good as gud. Ever heard of people having different accents? Also, where I’m from, using ‘tha’ would probably be more accurate than ‘the’.

    Oh, shit… *realises these people may just be from near where nor’n monkey is from*

  105. Otto said it, all Samual-L-Jackson-style, too. I am going to submit this to an institution which studies garden path sentences.

  106. My brain hurts from the stupid…

  107. Are people actually analyzing the phonetics of this conversation? I agree with you atentora, my brain hurts from the stupid…..

  108. He should KHITC

    Hope this helps

  109. It’s stupid but here in Australia people spell phonetically- even at school and it’s accepted. And then the idiots start working and I have to read their fucked up emails and documents! Get a clue people!

  110. @Bert
    I had to look that up. LOL.

  111. Wow, spelling is just awesome….whatever happened to “English”

  112. It probably died out with Latin.

  113. I didn’t understand any of this. But, my God, am i glad I don’t now these people. Poor kids involved!

  114. Haha i know of these people. They aren’t British, they’re Australian and they’ve been on again off again for ages. The latest was something to do with a kitten. One of them got a kitten and the other one didn’t like it. Classic!

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.