Thursday, May 6, 2010

Joe Knows Tattoos (part 2)

previous post: Joe Knows Tattoos (part 1)

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101 Comments

  1. Shit, Troy really does like Joe’s artwork… wtf is all that blue and green wiped on their skin? I’ve never seen a tattoo bleed ink like that before

  2. First

  3. liketotallycool

    Tattoo whore.

  4. Actually troy is the one who designs that shitty artwork (see his comment about copy writing that pot leaf tat)

  5. what an artist!

  6. Jesus, I don’t know who’s worse- Joe for actually doing those shitty tattoos, or Troy for going back to him over and over. Also, is Troy saying they cost $10? Don’t be a cheapskate, Troy.

  7. I think $10 is $20 too much.

  8. I love how great he is at aligning the letters. Remarkable in fact

  9. Why is this so hard to understand? I know Troy isn’t good at communicating his thoughts via writing or english in general, but he’s saying that because Joe used one of his drawings on a ‘customer,’ Joe should pay him 10 USD as copy write compensation.

  10. He should be paying his customers for destroying their bodies with his horrific ‘artwork’

  11. I’ve seen prison tat’s that are better than these. No amount of drugs would make these look ok. Take the Tattoo gun away from this joker and give him a real one.

  12. Joe must be completely blitzed every time he draws a tattoo. Maybe he does it for the crack addicts on the street out of his box?

  13. You’ve gotta wonder how high you’d have to be to say yes to this shit.

    Dig the paintball bullet bruise next to the piss poor yin yang.

  14. okay now this is just sad.

  15. Christ on a cracker

    You’d have to be mentally challenged to let this twat tattoo you

  16. Are you fucking kidding me?

  17. I have seen the fake little tattoos from the candy machines better than these… wait my dog just drew a bud leaf better than Joe holy shit I’m getting her Joe’s tattoo gun.

  18. PeachyFuckinKeen

    My 6 year old nephew can Kayden can write his name better than Joe can. I seriously hope these wash off!! Just a mess!!

  19. He should consider putting googly eyes and a dumbass smile on that joint so it’s at least funny… because it just looks like crap right now.

  20. I bet Troy looks like he just got back from a Kindergarten body painting booth at a carnival or something

  21. That’s prison quality right there.

  22. I know where I can now go to get my MOM tat now for mothers day.

  23. PeachyFuckinKeen

    Now I look like a mess by adding that extra can in there. Ooops

  24. It’s pretty obvious that Troy has very little understanding of how copyright works (eg. just saying something is copyrighted doesn’t make it so).

    Also, wow, shit tattoos.

  25. The high life tattoo reminds me of my brother’s friend’s tattoo which he got while on way too much Meth (then again, what amount isn’t too much when it comes to Meth)… except, I hate to say it, the high life tattoo is better. My brother’s friend’s tat is supposed to say “No Fear” (which is dumb regardless) but since there are no similar letters it actually says “Neo Fear” since the N and O are on the opposite sides of the E in fear going down vertically. So dumb. The only plus side to my brother’s friend’s tat is that it is done well other than the totally incorrect spelling.

  26. Have we considered the possibility that Joe may be special needs, and therefore actually doing a really GOOD job with his tattoos?

  27. @vitamin_k I think what the green is is the neon/fluorescent green ink, ink usually leeches from the skin during the tattooing process. My husband got a colored tat on his forearm and the tattoo artist was always wiping away the access ink which would smear around the cite. The think that gets me is that it looks glow-in-the-dark… is that safe? Probably not… silly of me to ask.

  28. oy! I meant site not cite. I’m writing a research paper and somehow carried it over into a Lamebook post… that’s prettay lame.

  29. if these are supposed to be brand new tatoos why isn’t his skin shaved?

    Last time I checked the ying hang symbol didn’t look like a demented twisty smiley face haha

  30. Does anyone else think that Troy’s going to be REALLY pissed off when he eventually comes down from his high…..?

    And also, wtf if Kaydin???

  31. *is

    lol @ Goldie

  32. @Stam

    *leaches, *excess, *thing, *pretty

    YOU’re writing a research paper?

  33. Correcting spelling on an internet forum – take a bow.

  34. you have got to kidding…these are in pen, right??

  35. @Stam I’ve got a couple of tatts (done by professionals) where ink leeched out a bit but I didnt get a stain like that. I guess it varies with types of ink. Or maybe it’s just most of the ink didn’t make it under the skin, who knows with Joe

  36. Suicide really is Joe’s only option. Why bother living as a dipshit.

  37. This man should be arrested for fraud.

  38. @vitamin_k This is true, which is why I brought up the fluorescent nature of it, either way the ink doesn’t look safe; like slime from a sewer or something.

    @slippyslappy Good point on the shaving… I’m not surprised Joe didn’t follow protocol. I’d hate to see what his idea of sanitation is.

  39. lol @ EmKitteh@Stam.

    Correcting spelling and grammar is normally a bit anal in my opinion too, but when someone says they’re writing a research paper I completely support it. Unless English is not Stam’s first language.

  40. @emkitteh you’re right, it really sounds like Troy is trying to be serious about the legality of copyright… what was it that tipped you off, the ‘lol’? I know I put that in all my serious legal matters.

  41. @mb @emkitteh Yep, I spelled sh*t wrong, made some errors. You both get “Good Samaritan of the Day” awards, bravo.

  42. Anyone who lets Joe anywhere near them is a moron. I wonder if he sterilses the equipment properly? Maybe for $10 hepatitis and HIV are thrown in for free.

  43. Uh, did anyone else happen to notice that the N is backwards in the first tattoo? I don’t know about you, but my capital “N” usually faces to the right, not the left….

  44. melissaphlegm

    I was looking at a fanpage about tats and I had to do a double take to make sure these weren’t pics from a guy on there. They are equally horrible haha. Why would someone advertise that?!

  45. OMG…You couldn’t pay me enough to get tattooed by Joe.

  46. #2 looks like a cover-up which helps explain the stupidity of the tattoo but not how heinously it turned out.

    #3 and #4 go together which makes me even more sad

  47. rebarbativebecc

    Please tell me this is some sort of joke..The second one kiiinda looks like pen but the others :s

  48. rebarbativebecc

    Luckily it looks like he’s done them on himself so no one else suffered

  49. i hope they enjoy their hep-c

  50. MachineGun Monica

    I work at a tattoo shop so these are especially upsetting to me o_O

  51. Joes knows his shitty tattoos.

    Hey I just thought of something… Everyone needs a niche to stand out in the world. Maybe Joe’s slogan is: “I’m Joe … I’ll give you a shitty tattoo! Those other guys have pride … Not me!”

    heh

  52. Why is the yin-yang symbol the same color on both sides? Does he even understand what the dual nature of the symbol means? Having both sides the same doesn’t even make sense.

  53. This is so sad, so very very sad.

    @ Bulldog – I was thinking the same thing, we should be proud of this special one.

  54. joe and troy…and their tattoo monstrosities makes me sick end of.

  55. WORST TATTOOS I HAVE EVER SEEN!

  56. LMAO. I love that there’s two parts. You know, Joe obviously sucks. But, Troy.. why would he do this to his body?

  57. Ahh, this makes me want to go out and get a shitty tattoo. Yeap, I digress…

  58. Why are there so many people called Troy in this tale of delicious failure?
    This both confuses and terrifies me.
    @ #2 did something shit on his arm?

  59. P.S. Kiddies… Think before you ink! It’s permanent, as Joe has delightfully detailed for us! Just think about what your grandchildren will say when they see a pot leaf on your forearm. (Get it on your ass, out of sight…out of mind. Plus what grandpa shows his ass to his grand kids. It’s a safe zone!)

  60. eenerbl, you would think it’s a safe zone, but you never met my Grampy Jack. Sure, most of the time it was my ass getting tattooed by his electric needle (actually, it was more of a hydraulic pump thing, but whatever). However, on occasion he liked to make me plant the Soup family tree into his dark soil.

  61. Oh Soup, I’m sure the dark soil is much richer now due to you. It may have been ‘hard and demanding’ but you’ve help enrich
    your family tree for further good. All is well, don’t freat.

  62. Thank you. Planting that seed was hard work in such a parched and arid area, but I did my duty and plowed until the fertilizer was released.

  63. @slippyslappy if you look closely, you can see that the area is actually shaved.

  64. Is that supposed to say “Kaydin”, or do you think it’s actually “Kayahs”? As in a really bad attempt at spelling “Chaos”?? Because that would make this an even more amazing level of fail

  65. @Stam

    Wow, I got two bitter responses from you. I must have really hit a nerve. I don’t usually correct people’s spelling on here but the fact that you made numerous mistakes and then went on to correct just one of them, AND excuse yourself for it, AND bring up that you’re writing a research paper, well, it tickled my funny bone just right.

    Also, oh wow, you mean Troy wasn’t being serious about that copyright thing?? I never would have figured that out. I just find that jokes are funnier when they aren’t stupid, that’s all. N.B. adding ‘lol’ doesn’t make something funny.

    Oh and thanks for that Good Samaritan of the Day award. I’ll keep an eye on the post for my certificate.

  66. Holy shit is all I can say.

  67. Slanderous Princess

    Hahaha @25
    I’m still laughing at you’re brother’s bad ass “neo fear” tattoo.

    Had no idea a yin yang could go so horribly wrong. Looks like he ran out of black ink and just left it like that… Good thing he decided to ink on a doobie beside that pot leaf and “high life” or he probably wouldn’t get his point across that he’s super high, lol.

  68. Maybe it was meant to say neo, maybe they thought they was living in the matrix!

  69. Apparently Kaydin is a band.

  70. This is why tattoo kits for $100 need to be destroyed.
    Or at least stop selling them.
    I regard this sort of thing as public indecency.
    It hurts my eyes.

  71. What type of dipshit allows another (amateur) dipshit to permanently scar his body with crappy drawings. Joe probably got a B- at Art in High School, and now beleives he is truely awesome.

    Oh… shit… I just threw up in my mouth.

  72. *believes

  73. Well I came back for a look and sure enough here’s Joe’s round 2.
    There’s not much left to say.

    But Joe, really?, high life?, more like fuckin’ low life.

  74. I feel lame for actually caring, but what is that last one? It looks like a Buffy the Vampire Slayer stake and a piece of gum, you know the kinda with the twisty paper. Seriously, what?

  75. greesee: i believe it’s a very poorly drawn joint next to a pot leaf.

    these are so terrible. they’re drawn/tattooed horribly and they’re also just stupid to begin with. nothing says hire me like a pot leaf and “high life” tattooed on you arm. -_-

  76. acrosstheuniverse

    These must be the most dumbest tattoo’s I have ever seen in my life.

  77. Welcome to Joe’s HIV Parlor Of Needles.
    Free meaningless scribble or illegible word printed on your body with every sale.

  78. rebarbativebecc

    @26 Oh come on, my mum worked with Special Needs people who could do better art than that.

  79. in all fairness to joe’s horrendous tattooing abilities, that’s a pretty nice and accurate-ish pot leaf.. I’m a graphic designer and had to take all those dumb drawing classes for my BA and i reeeally can’t draw a nice-looking one.

  80. You Got Doddified

    What in god’s name would she say when you stripped naked and saw these atrocities? I still don’t even know what the first one says. What’s worse is the fact that, out of the entire of Troy’s body, he chose the high-life one in exactly the right position to overlap the luminous green cannabis… er, stencil. Lamebook has a [pooless] Fro-joe.

  81. @59, 60, 61, 62
    ROFLMFAO!

  82. Someone needs to report this guy to appropriate authorities before he starts an outbreak of MRSA or gives someone hepatitis. He’s obviously not tattooing this guy in a legit shop. Yeah, the shitty tattoos are funny, but this shit is seriously dangerous and needs to be stopped before someone gets hurt.

  83. Am I seeing things in #1….or i sthat a naked body he’s holding???

  84. erm……is that even………eyes are tired :9

  85. These are the worst tattoos I’ve ever seen.
    Also,
    @EmKitteh If you’re going to correct someone’s spelling. Check it, first? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leech

  86. Wow he must do these stoned in his basement. I’m sure hepatitis abounds!

  87. Thanks Bam but I did use the wrong word, I should have used “leach” instead of “leech” although, leech does make for a whole new meaning… I’s gets cornfused sumtimz carn sarn it. The best part is I’m going to school to be a grad-school teacher, muahaha.

  88. YEAH! My posts made it on Lamebook! Joe sure does suck at tattoos!
    Troy and the others are losers who deserve shit artwork on their bodies!
    The N in “Kaydin” is backwards, that’s the funniest part

  89. syxx, frankly, I think Joe just sucks.

    Period.

  90. Oh my god you guys, I am from this post on relinquishing my right to post on this discussion board. I meant grade-school not grad-school and thank god I was only kidding about becoming a teacher.

  91. Stam, based on what I’ve seen from teachers these days, I think your qualifications are top notch. If you could just fuck a few children, I think your tenure is guaranteed.

  92. taureanemerald

    lmao @ mceilly’s ‘first’ but was second! That is perfect for lamebook!

  93. All those tats look like they were done at home. Permanent ink you idiots, way to be.

  94. I think Joe is tattooing people off his bed. Those sure look like bed sheets his ‘customers’ are lying on :|

  95. My god… :| Anyone got Joe’s number? I wanna book an appointment ¬_¬

  96. hitmewithyourrhythmvic

    I will bet you the copyright on Troy’s tatt that this is prison work with some Indian ink and darning needle…

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  98. lol

  99. just got hepatitis

  100. The tribute to a stoner’s life tattoos are on his leg – on the back of his calf. Slightly better because it can be hidden? No?

    … No.

    And I thought the “joint” was a pencil at first.

  101. To be completely honest and fair, it looks like someone is learning how to make tattoos using a “Learn to Tattoo!!! Kit” (which I’m sure MUST be available somewhere on Teh Internetz) instead of the time-honored traditions of apprenticeship, and the only person who is willing to give up his body for this learning is a complete pothead; this is only right as a complete pothead is intent on destroying his body anyway, so what the hell, go on ahead and fuck up that temple, dude!

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