Friday, December 25, 2009

It’s a Lamebook Christmas: Part 4

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previous post: It’s a Lamebook Christmas: Part 3

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76 Comments

  1. Stacey’s a real pistol for that one. And really, Katelyn?

  2. Maria and Stacey ought to go quail hunting with Dick Cheney.

  3. That is a great idea, Antarctic Circle.

  4. The first post definitely is an inside joke…

  5. Vince from purchasing

    Katelyn is on the money. I like her style.
    Tanya – why did this get posted? Not lame or funny.

  6. Maria’s a moron and Stacey and Katelyn are just too stupid to be using up our precious oxygen.

  7. Katelyn just made my life.

  8. Maria will shoot her eye out!

  9. Katelyn is… lovely. (:

  10. Merry Godmas, one and all!

  11. Katelyn is my favorite facebook comment-er of all time!

  12. To be fair to the last post jesus wasn’t born on christmas they just set that date because it was already a pagan holiday, i think its was roughly september/october by most experts

  13. LMFAO at Katelyn! She can’t be serious. I want to believe that she was just trying to be funny. No one could make that comment and be serious about it.

  14. @tamedshrew
    why can’t she be serious? I agree with her whole heartedly!

    uh, and perhaps I’m missing something here. what is a Shotgun? I, like Stacey, only know of it as a gun. or a phrase you call out to dibs the front seat of a car…

  15. Tanya Post: I wonder if this was submitted because Joshua and Martha were married but decided to have a trial separation. Joshua gets smug with his post, so Martha retaliates with what is really on her mind.

  16. Katelyn is defiantly going to hell.

  17. @ Remo
    Shotguns and pistols are both different types of guns, not something that means guns in general.
    Shotguns are very large guns (imagine an angry farmer is forcing you to marry his daughter – that long gun he’s holding to your back is a shotgun), while a pistol is a type of small handgun.
    Do a quick image search on the two to get a better understanding of the difference, it’s hard to explain further than that.

  18. That Wesley dude is gold.

  19. worst_episode_ever

    what a bunch of idiots… except wesley he’s hilarious

  20. I just want to share my worst Christmas gift. I got my first period on Christmas. :(

  21. My friend’s little brother threw shoes at my head on Christmas Day.

  22. also to add to my earlier comment christmas’s religious roots have died its just a holiday nowdays where you buy presents for each other basicially

    so while katelyn is being ignorant she is actually being right but i seriously doubts she knows either way

  23. ^ I don’t mean to sound condescending but it is called (Jesus) CHRISTmas. She obviously was either joking or she did not realise this, and is therefore a moron.

  24. His name is Jesus Christ!! Christmas is named after Jesus Christ! That’s why she can’t be serious!

    Am I missing something Remo?! Are you being sarcastic?

  25. Christmas is a pagan holiday, Jesus was born in the spring.
    So yeah. Katelyn is still an idiot. “Chrismas”, how can you not know how to spell “CHRISTMAS” and how are you not intelligent enough to put two and two together and realize the “christ” in it.

  26. It’s easy to not know how to spell Christmas if you’re typing quickly and don’t realise you missed one letter. It’s not that big a deal.

  27. Stacey is just plain stupid.

  28. I would very much like to punch Katelyn in the uterus.

  29. Maria, pass me the shotgun.
    Go and stand over there with Stacey and Katelyn.
    Now, close your eyes and make a wish . . .

  30. Ideas for new Wii games – (i) Fighting midgets, or small children, (ii) shooting with a shotgun/pistol facebook idiots and (iii) trying to come up with better comments than Katelyn, then nailing her to a cross when you can’t.

  31. @Maria: You’ll shoot your eye out.

  32. @NeenerNeener
    Ah, thanks for clearing up the whole shotgun vs pistol. I guess I’m not up to date with my guns, not that I care to be.

    @tamedshrew
    No, I’m not being sarcastic. I’m sure she knows it’s named after Jesus Christ, but at someone mentioned, it is now celebrated by many in a secular way, with no religious meaning.
    Jesus, if he was real, was just a guy, not God.
    At Christmas I care about family and friends, not about a God or a guy who may or may not have existed.

  33. I hate to break it to you “remo”, but jesus DID exist. There is definite proof that he walked on earth, and was crucified for claiming to be the son of God. Whether or not he actually WAS the son of God, is up to you to believe.. but to say its about a guy who “may or may have not existed” makes you pretty much as stupid as the idiot who couldn’t figure out that the word CHRIST was part of christmas. Hope you had a merry one tho.

  34. @miss.treec how do you know jesus did exist what proof is there?

  35. @ miss.trec: jesus was just a fake.

  36. @MeIsHere- apparently there is some sort of record of the crucifixion of a guy called Jesus written by the Romans who did the deed. Not sure if that’s right but that’s what I heard :/

    I don’t think it makes any difference whether he existed or not since Christians are still going to have a fit about CHRISTmas being about Jesus and the secular people are still going to point out that it was originally a pagan holiday (as well as Saturnalia for the Romans…) aaaaaand the cynics are still going to point out that some people are too wrapped up in the materialistic view of it.

    xD I just hope everyone had a nice time this year.

  37. while katelyn is a dumbass…but yes, christmas was hijacked from pagan roots. i normally don’t really give a fuck about this, except when people complain that consumerism is stealing it from jesus. i mean, i hate capitalism more than most of the people who say this, but really, it serves them right. they stole the holiday and inserted their own meaning in the first place.

  38. Christians are retarts! My siblings go to a Christian school, and it is common place for teachers to ridicule those of a different religion (including Catholics) and Jewish people. My sister (whom is 10) asked a teacher one day ‘If Jesus was a Jew, because he is known as the King of the Jews’. She got a detention for it. My point being religion is fucked – I don’t mean to say that a deity is non-existent. Christmas is about spending time with people you love and giving a gift from the heart. Fuck commercialism and fuck religion.

  39. @ insane. LOL RETARTS. Fuck spelling too, apparently?

  40. @Insane it’s retard not retart. As for your whole rant, really how much of an idiot can you be to generalize a whole group of people, apparently you’re on the “retart” level. Do yourself a favor and stay single, sterile and angry for the rest of your life. It works for you.

  41. Jeez I said the F word and got moderated. So i’ll try again a idiotic poster on here used to call people retarts. He/she/possibly a typing monkey was named after Benders “evil twin”. But its now the f word apparently and moderated.

  42. Its now a joke. BTW socash is a frodo and carmen89 doesnt have a pool. I always wanted to do that and it just felt like the right moment. I can know move on to my next goal of being first.

  43. Really people, regardless of your feelings about religion (mine are far from positive), Katelyn is still a dumbass. It’s called Christmas, not Godmas? When you’re talking about Jesus (and you’re a Christian or are talking hypothetically, Christ and God are interchangeable. So even if you don’t agree that the holiday should be about remembering his birth, Katelyn is a complete moron and is in no way right.

  44. @remo. You give this girl way too much credit. She’s an idiot. There is no deeper meaning behind her statement. She’s not, in any way, trying to prove a point. It has nothing to do with Pagan Holiday or any such thing or yada yada yada blah blah blah. Why are you [people] making her comment more than it is. Come on now! Y’all are missing the idiocy that is Katelyn. Dummie down your brains for this one.

  45. @Insane
    You say you go to a Christian school but Catholics are made fun of by the teachers? Catholics are Christian. But if you really think that it is a problem at your school you should tell your parents and/or the principal. And just cuz the teachers at you school are idiots doesn’t mean that all Christians are.

  46. @Pink broccoli – Good point xP Yeah it was a pagan festival but the christians stole it.lol

  47. Exactly, Camilla1. :)

    So let me get this straight. According to the logic here, If I’m born on July 4th and my family chooses to celebrate my birthday on that day each year, we’ve “stolen” Independence Day. Pagans can still celebrate their holiday. Nobody has hijacked it.

    Our American educational system is now officially a failure.

    On another point, it IS true that we have “stolen” the celebration of the births of Lincoln and Washington. We now have morphed their birthday celebrations into a generic “Presidents’ Day”. We’ve taken days that celebrate these great men and turned it into a holiday to praise the Office of the President. Now THAT is something worthy of Lamebook.

  48. @ carmen89 @ socash: Retart is a long running joke here on Lamebook. So you may want to rethink your stance.

    @socash: If you are willing to stick up for such a backward congregation of people then I urge you to turn off your computer, return to your fathers basement, and let him and his cult friends keep having there way with you. In laymen terms (or to put it simply), just fuck off and shut the fuck up you moron!

    @camilla1: Go back and re-read my comment. Siblings means my brother/s and/or sister/s. Siblings does not mean me. Christians actually ‘stole’ their religion from Catholics (not that I give a flying fuck). So technically Christians are Catholics. I know that not all Christians are retarded, but most of the older generation is, and those without brians (another lamebook joke) in the new generation are following the close minded traditions of old. So yes, not all Christians are retarded, but alot of them are. Besides my point is, “FUCK RELIGION!!! It causes so many unnecessary disputes and wars over trivial bullshit all because people believe their way of worship (and their deity) is superior other peoples system of belief. Religion = bad!

  49. @Insane
    I understand you have your point of view and all.
    But who are you to talk down to religion like that? What makes you think you are right? Yes, there’s been unecessary wars over religion. But if there weren’t religion then the people would find another reason to fight. so shut it man

  50. @Facehead: If you truly understood my point of view then you wouldn’t be criticising me for my belief, and my ‘talking down to religion’. Christianity has covered up a testament by Jesus Christ that says ‘god is not found in a building or church, rather he is found behind every tree and every rock’. Christianity is a prime example of how religion contradicts its belief structure. And I do agree that wars would be started for another mediocre reason is religion wasn’t around. But if religion wasn’t around then there would be less reasons for war. I don’t knock the belief in god (or other deity’s), it is just religion that is so fucking backward. So why don’t you STFU!?

  51. @Insane: “… mediocre reason is religion wasn’t around.”- “if” would be the correct word to use in this sentence… “if.”

  52. @mark1989: Many thanks to your magnificent insight to the English language. I’m not sure that viewers of this site could have deciphered my simple typo.

  53. @ Insane… I am gone one freaking day…

    Let us get something straight. You all say that everybody has freedom of speech, and yet, you morons go and crap all over someone who actually does just that – has free speech! Now, I understand if you fear for your life if you say something a tad out of line (because your mother would beat you to a bloody pulp) but once you let the reins go and not give a FLYING FUCK what every DOUCHEBAG says, you will experience true freedom of speech. You guys seriously don’t know where the Douchebag section on this web page is? I am sure you will feel a whole lot more comfortable there.

    Back to Insane. I APPLAUDE you for your statement and say – FUCK RELIGION TOO! Any of you pussies who feel like burning me at the stake – do your fucking homework and go read some Richard Dawkins, mmmmkay? This is Svetlana.

    PS: That’s who??

    Ssssvetlana.

  54. Also read Christopher Hitchens and Sam Harris.
    And how do scholars know for sure that Jesus was a Jew?
    He thought his mother was a virgin, and she thought he was god!

  55. wow, this topic sure did skate off in a new direction.

    as a person who tends to follow a more earth/nature honoring religion, I respect Insane and Sveltana’s opinions. I am also not a huges fan of organized religion. But um guys, its only lamebook remember?

  56. oops, sorry Svetlana, didn’t mean to typo in your name.

  57. @Svetlana: I had to leave you an interesting present. I’m glad you like it :D And many thanks for the accolades.

    @yaya: That is my beef with religion. The organised ones like Catholicism and Christianity. They contradict themselves so frequently (and on important items to their belief system) that, that alone makes me question their legitimacy – not that there is any. In all fairness it was the people I pointed out in comment 49 that turned this feed into a anti-religion crusade. I made a comment, said people didn’t like it, so off I went again.

    @Mishkin: I really doubt that Mary was a virgin. If she wasn’t putting out Joseph would have found the next available broad ready to go. Like he was going to put up with having a severe case of blueballitis! I also vaguely remember reading (many years ago now) that Mary and Joseph tried to conceive a child without luck.

  58. are you kidding, its CHRISTmas as in Jesus Christ…haha wow. Someone people on here are just as dense as the lamebookers, not trying to push a religious agenda as my family doesn’t even do the whole christian thing but theres still a background to it

  59. @anduin1 – now you too can see what the background on Baby Jesus Day is – http://www.nobeliefs.com/facts.htm#anchor189702

  60. Catholicism is a branch of Christianity

  61. @ yayforme – please don’t be an ignorant person, and click the link above… I know you want to…

  62. @Svetlana: You are a very naughty girl for posting that link and you will go straight to hell. Whatever next? You’ll be telling me Santa Claus doesn’t exist…

  63. Mercure, you didn’t know?? *Tears in eyes, darting around* I don’t know how to break this to you… *Silent sobbing* but, neither does the Easter Bunny! *Burst into tears whilst running away*

  64. I’m was not talking about holidays. I just don’t understand Insane’s quote: “Christians actually ‘stole’ their religion from Catholics”. Roman Catholics? Eastern Catholics? By Christians does he mean “Protestants”?

  65. @yayforme: [Roman]Catholicism was around before Christianity – and before that there were many more practised religions. Christianity took what they liked from the Catholics and what they didn’t like they altered. As for the fine details of different branches of Christianity and Catholics, I do not know, and I do not care.

  66. Is Insane for real? How the hell can you make such a lame error?

    @Insane: Christian History (potted) 101:
    From foundation of christianity to present day: there is only christian. There are lots of flavours: coptic, hittite, (after great schism) eastern orthodox, etc, and within the western canon there were different churches for a while – eg. Celtic, Roman etc. (‘catholic’ is just another word for ‘orthodox’.) During the middle ages and later the secular power of Rome increased, and the Roman church (and the Pope) took greater control over the whole of European christianity.

    After the Reformation, there was protestantism. No doubt many protestants would insist theirs is the true faith and the catholic church the aberration, but the fact is they wanted to secede from the power of Rome.

    There was no ‘theft’ of ideas or anything.

    You say you don’t know or care about these distinctions, and yet you insist on making them. Can I suggest you learn a little before irritating the rest of us.

    Oh and one more thing. Many catholics find ‘roman catholic’ offensive. But to suggest they are not christian is probably even more so.

  67. @excatholica Well said.

  68. Yep, couldn’t have said it better myself.

  69. Christ on a cracker

    Hey, Katelyn, wait a minute, you diseased infected whore! Don’t be talking about me or my daddy in such way. It’s NOT our fault you were born retarded, blame your dad and his sister for it.

  70. @excatholica: Sweet mother of mercy! Are you really that retarted? Let me repeat this phrase, as I have said before, this time worded a little more carefully so your ego may have the ability to comprehend what I mean to say. I DO NOT CARE ABOUT RELIGION! I DO NOT CARE IF I UPSET THEIR FOLLOWERS!! RELIGION IS EVIL!!! Seriously just no. STFU and GTFO!!! If you bothered to even read my comment you would see what I was trying to say, and my admittance to not knowing the specifics because….I DON’T GIVE A FLYING FUCK!!!

  71. Chill yer beans insane, I also think religion is a pile of cack. My point is, you insist to the point of apoplexy that you don’t give a shit about fine distinctions, while attempting to educate the rest of us about those very distinctions you ostensibly don’t give a shit about.

    If you wade into these waters, it’s a bit rich that you expect those already knee-deep in them to ‘stfu’ or ‘gtfo’. One might say the same to you.

    I would suggest, for the sake of your own sanity and to avoid an aneurysm, that you avoid discussion of christian vs catholic (or indeed any other distinction you “don’t give a shit about” in future.

    That is all.

  72. *about”) sorry.

    … anyway, I am discussing history not theology. Theology is a waste of space. History, on the other hand…

  73. @excatholica: My apologies excatholica. I’m a little frustrated that what started out as a simple comment has evolved into a novel of ignorance – contributions by myself and others. Anyway my point being that I was venting/winging at first and ended up being crucified by people that refused to read my statement properly. My point ‘was’ simple. FUCK RELIGION!, with a short ‘ironic’ story. If I have met you with hostility I’m sure you can understand why.

  74. Katelyn is a retard on about 7 different levels.
    She probably doesn’t know the difference between “Merry ChrisTmas” and “Happy Holidays” either.
    *Chrismas, excuse me.

  75. Jesus Christ, Katelyn.

  76. About the last one: what baffled me was Henry’s comment, “You’re 4 months late”. And then, in the comments, Leprechaunish (#25) said “Christmas is a pagan holiday, Jesus was born in the spring.” Dude, what? Are you people being serious? Jesus was born in December, and DIED in the Spring.

    And I might as well add that I’m not a religious person. I’ve never really believed that there’s a God, but I don’t deny his existence, either. I’m also not an agnostic: I just don’t think about this. Believe or don’t, just treat others as your equal, that has been my lifeline ever since I was a kid.

    But we do have religion as a school subject here in Finland, and I do remember the basic fact that Christmas was the birthday. I was an angel in every school play.

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