Can’t really say much, this used to be me, except I wasn’t as stupid, and could type. Also, I had the presence of mind to not preserve my drunken bullshit as something that will live on the internet forever. I hope someone prints this out and shows it to her when they go visit her in rehab.
Ohmygod guysss, I’m so cool, I DRINK SO MUCH, that makes me suuuuch a BADASS haha LOL!
And just in case you guysss hadn’t noticed my desperate attempts to look like a rockstar at parties, I want to make a note about how MUCH I DRINK and tag you all in it so you know how COOL I am.
Please add comments after, just little stories about WHEN I GET SO DRUNK at parties and do sillayy stuff, cuz it’s just soooo funny that I’m SUCH A DRUNK MESS!! LOL!
Chick probably gets wasted after a couple of pre-mixed lolly waters.
Boz, I’m always drinking, like alllllll the timeeeee, i get drunkkkk at partiessss and then throwwww up, on the hoooooostt, i one time pulllllleeeed a kniiiiiifeeee from the cutlery drawer, and accidentally stabbed some random guy in the forearm.
after it happened on a monthly basis i added it to my list of things to do.
1 – Don’t drink so much that I go looking for a bottle opener and wind up with a cleaver again. Although it works, people may doubt my sobriety, and give me shit or something about it the next day.
ambitank is a GREAT nickname, and i should hope she strives to maintain it.
as an aside, i’m really glad she doubles up all the last letters of her words. i think it’s all to often we don’t appreciate the last letters of words when we use them, -and her gratuitous overuse really made me sit back and think, “yeah, I’m glad I stayed at school”.
If that’s not the saddest cry for help I’ve ever seen, then I don’t know what is. I feel like we all owe Amber the courtesy of checking behind our vehicles to make sure she’s not passed out back there and then, you know, move her a little bit so we only smash up her legs when we back out of the parking space.
There may not be direct evidence, but I’d say that there’s some indirect evidence. First of all, take goal (3): Amber doesn’t want to be “the drunk girl.” Now, what can we say about the drunk girl? The drunk girl, I would contend, almost inevitably ends up irritating her decent friends to the point where they start going out without her, and she ends up hanging out with people who are enthusiastic about her level of partying (this may be limited if she is in a sorority, but the following will likely apply to her anyway).
Who are these people? Typically, they will be of the bro/frat boy mold, and their female counterparts (this is how the sorority thing gets her back into the generalization). And what happens to the drunk girl at bro/frat boy parties? QED.
For another example, take goal (5): Amber wants to stop trying to drink “more than the boys.” What kind of guy gets into drinking competitions with girls? For one, the very bro/frat boy type identified above. For another, guys who have engaged the girl in a flirtatious manner. In any case, there is likely to be a vaguely sexual overtone to the competitive nature of the drinking activities. Further, by habitually seeking these activities out, Amber signals that she is more likely to be an attention-seeker and someone who is in need of approval and admiration. On the basis of this collection of evidence, it does not seem unlikely that many of these drinking competitions end with Amber engaging in some level of sexual congress with one of the guys with whom she is drinking.
Granted, all of the above is based on gross over-generalizations and profiling. Clearly, Amber could very possibly not be a promiscuous girl. But if my familiarity with the sociology of Amber’s actions is informative here, it seems that we could at least draw some speculative conclusions about the sorts of things that Amber is doing while drunk.
I used to be “the drunk girl”, but at least I’ve never been part of the douche fratboy crowd, so there goes the longwinded, oversimplified, overly stereotypical and generalised point you were trying to make.
1) Glad you got out of that lifestyle!
2) I certainly didn’t mean to suggest that all “the drunk girl”-s are promiscuous; perhaps just that they are statistically more likely to be promiscuous than the baseline population.
3) Your writing is better than hers; that has to count for something. I would bet that the number of times that someone has typed “sillayyy” correlates to some degree with promiscuity (though perhaps through a common cause: stupidity).
4) Did you drink-compete with “the boys”?
1) Thanks, so am I.
2) Alcohol does lower inhibitions and impair judgement etc, so you do have a point there. Not that I think there’s anything wrong with being sexually active, I just think it should be an informed, safe choice, which isn’t always the case when alcohol is involved.
3) Hahaha. Even when I was in kindergarden and writing my name with a backwards J, it never would’ve crossed my mind to say/write something as ..well, as silly as “sillayyy”. I don’t think being sexually active automatically equals stupid, so long as everyone involved is a consenting adult and being safe, but that is, again, not always the case when alcohol is involved; alcohol rarely leads to smart choices.
4) I’ve never met anyone, of either gender, who has drinking competitions. I think this is at least somewhat connected to the fact that I’ve never hung out with fratties.
Why is the use of the @ symbol grounds for calling someone an ignoramus when people like Miss Amber here are prancing about the internet using words like “similarrrr” and “sillayyy?” Pick your battles, man.
If she really wanted help you’d think she’s go to an AA meeting. Not just repeat over and over (which by the way, seeing as she seems as though she is laughing through the entire thing REALLY makes her seem fake) that she needs to stop being such a drunken idiot.
@33 Danny – not sure why there’s an assumption that this is a sorority girl. Sadly I knew way too many of these at Uni and we don’t have sororities in England
@38 Abel – me too. I have no memory for faces/names. And I barely drink these days. Maybe it was my drunken yesteryears that screwed it up…
@43 Chincillazilla – Hehehe
@42 Mittens – don’t get @@@@@@@@@ started! He/she is just a douchebag who needs to change the f*****g record and get f*****g a life! Same whine every time. It’d be okay if it was even marginally inventive. Actually, no. It wouldn’t.
seriously why is the @ symbol such a bone of contention? It pisses me off when people over-use ellipses… but that’s too bad since as far as I know nothing on anyone’s keyboard – punctuation, letters, symbols etc. is copyright.
Sometimes I like to use the @ symbol when I’m sending emails. Hope that’s okay with you.
I suppose if using the @ symbol is objectionable, then I’m guilty.
2 and 3) I’m definitely not suggesting that promiscuity is itself objectionable. It is, perhaps, more likely to be the sort of promiscuity that signals a lack of virtue when it is the indiscriminate sort that sometimes accompanies heavy drinking on the part of stupid girls (and boys). And it should definitely be pointed out that I’m not saying, “Sexually active people are more likely to be stupid;” rather, I’m hypothesizing that perhaps, “Stupid people are more likely to be sexually active.”
4) The drinking competition thing is a big part of my stereotyping. During my freshman year as an undergraduate, when the search for free beer led me to a number of unsavory parties, I met a number of these girls. A pathetically small sample size, to be sure, but good lord: they left an impression.
I wasn’t making that assumption. My point was only that when “the drunk girl” is a sorority member, it is less likely that she will be abandoned by her decent friends. For their other faults, sorority girls are often extremely loyal.
I take it that a lack of decent companions has something to do with making bad sexual decisions. The drunk girl, I wanted to suggest, may lack such companions in light of her lifestyle choices. If she were a sorority girl, these choices might not have this effect. But, I also wanted to suggest, sorority girls might be statistically more likely to hang out with d-bag guys, which would seem to counteract this advantage.
Just so you know @@@@@@@, if it is indeed you playing as Leverhunder there, jojo got his ip address suspended for foul and abusive language as well as impersonating others. It might be a good idea not to follow in his/her footsteps
I guarantee you that “Ambitank” is a nickname she made up and gave herself. I don’t understand the whole adding additional letters to the end of words thing. When you type like that it makesssss you look likeeeee a fuckinggggg imbecileeeeeee.
Im sure she is one of many young women who drink a few beers and a couple shots, then wander around acting stupid all night. The ones who cant handle a little liquor and then act retarded all night…..are the same ones who are proud of that fact. The real drinkers are the quiet ones, the ones who arent proud and retarded about the fact. Women like Ambitank are a dime a dozen, can be found in any bar, leaching free drinks off of guys, in hopes that the guy thinks they are cute. They arent cute, sexy or attractive. Most of them are fat animals that need a treadmill, not another drink or late night taco.
It’s amazing, everything she said here resounded within me as a throwback to my drinking days…dear me, I knew I was a noted and particularly sensational alcoholic, I didn’t know I was being *shudder* TYPICAL!! Eeek!
Yes, #64 (‘me’, rather?) A whole lot of people would like to read a page about someone who makes the occasional comment about an amusing lamebook entry, and who sometimes agrees with, or chuckles at, someone elses comment. Simply enthralling, it would be. x) If that is what I’m aiming for then I suck *big-time* at it.