Friday, June 4, 2010

FANtastic Friday

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54 Comments

  1. zzzz
    The last one is gross.

  2. the first one is f*kin disgusting what sick c*nt can think like that….

  3. Haha about the sunchips bags, they are the loudest bags ever!

  4. Africa’s an entire continent. The parts that have drought are in the desert. First one’s just fucking stupid. The other ones aren’t even funny, except for the Sun Chips one, which actually cracked me up.

  5. Why is it necessary to make a group for every idea someone thinks up? I mean, I could make groups about all kinds of random shit, but I don’t. I use self control and do not clutter the internet with pure crap. Well, except for may be this comment . . .

  6. Paranoid Android

    ‘I came here to read something funny, LOL JK, I’m actually on lamebook’

  7. There are way too many groups out there.

  8. Wait… why is there a question mark after “I’m not a player, my dick is just social?”?

    That doesn’t make sense…

  9. and these are why lamebook exists.

  10. Lame as fuck. You can do better than this.

  11. @StarryNight
    Maybe the commas in the wrong place. Maybe it should be “I’m not a player, my dick. Is just social?”

    That doesn’t make sense either.
    Grammar fail.

  12. lol @ Paranoid Paranoid Android

    these are all craptastic! I don’t get the 5th one… take it, its an American thing along with the sun chips bag?!

  13. erm no idea why I wrote Paranoid twice… must be mental

  14. The bleeding for a week joke was around when I was at junior school. It didn’t really make anyone laugh then.

    I’m in a joyful mood today, as you can tell.

  15. The last one is a quote from the Todd Solondz film ‘Welcome to the Dollhouse’. It’s awesome!

  16. @Numnum, since Spanish speakers are so prevalent in the US, pretty much any number you call that has an automated system asks you to press 1 for English or 2 for Spanish.

    A lot of people get all up in arms about it, with the ever loving, ‘THIS IS OUR COUNTRY, LEARN OUR LANGUAGE.’

  17. @chiiro: Usually it’s more along the lines of “This is are country! Learn American if you wanna live in America!”

  18. @chiro.. LOLz I love those people! They tend to forget that the United States has no official language. And if it did, it would be a complicated combination of over 100 Native American dialects.

  19. the new sun chips bags ARE very loud. I guess that’s the price you pay for compostible (foil? plastic? paper-foil hybrid? WHAT THE HELL ARE THOSE BAGS MADE OF THAT MAKE THEM SO LOUD?) chip bags. Yay Earth!

  20. I think the bag’s noise is part of their marketing ploy. When someone opens a bag you think “what a douche” but then you immediately think “nomnomnom I want some chips”

  21. true, but the noise makes me feel like a fatty douche when i reach into the bag for a chip and the entire room turns to look at me. It’s why i haven’t bought any since i bought that one bag.

  22. i love malteaser too

    I don’t understand what’s so wrong about “African” if the term “Asian” is legitimate.

  23. @amtrak4lovers Yeah, it’s definitely a statement and not a question. Yeah, grammar fail.

  24. @ i love malteaser too: I don’t think the offensiveness stems from the use of the term “African” (which is a legitimate designation for people from Africa), so much as it is 1. in really bad taste, and 2. implies that all of Africa is a desert and thus suffers from severe water shortages, which is NOT the case. All in all, I am offended by both it’s stupidity, and the implied disgusting sentiment (“Oh, I am better off than malnourished, dehydrated children in 3rd world countries! Let’s all point and laugh!”)

    That’s my take on it, anyways.

  25. @Terex, it’s made out of polylactic acid which is from plant-based materials, namely corn starch or sugarcane. I guess it sounds different because plant-based materials aren’t as pliable at room temperature.

  26. There should be some kind of system that requires you to take a certified IQ test when you click the ‘Make a Group button’ which only lets you proceed if you rank among the top… one person in the whole country. And then if you manage it and your group is STILL shit, Facebook sends someone round to… poke you in the eye.

  27. In the words of Big Pun, “I’m not a player, I just crush a lot.” I think his words are better than this unfunny group.

  28. MsBuzzkillington

    The sun chips one made me laugh, those bags are extremely loud. A ninja couldn’t even sneak a chip out of there without everyone hearing.

    The question mark after the word social makes sense. It’s like he is searching for an excuse. I am not a player.. my dick is just… um…. social? Right?? Right??

  29. MsBuzzkillington

    Also, I wanted to add.. I liked the pressing 1 for English group. Drives me insane how many people join the group “I live in America, I shouldn’t have to press one for English.” BARF.

  30. I’m American and I don’t pressing “1″ for English.
    Anybody who does is too busy pressing their forehead against Uncle Sams belt buckle.

  31. I like the pressing one for English too. There are waaaay too many assholes out there who complain about about the dumbest shit.
    who cares if you have to press one for English. Just press it and move on with your life you fucktard.

  32. Thank you, MsBuzzkillington, that’s how I read it as well. I totally joined that pressing 1 for English group. Pisses me off when I see my own friends join groups that say the opposite…

  33. i don’t understand the first one. what is SUPPOSED to be funny about it? obviously it fails on every level, but what was the ‘joke’?

  34. I love the pressing 1 group. I was all worked up yesterday when a few FB “friends” joined the group “why press 1 for English when the guy on the other end can’t speak it” and I clicked on it to see and it’s just full of slack-jawed yokel americans hurling racial slurs out onto the interweb. I’m with Hobo on the IQ test idea… so long as I get to do the eye poking.

  35. The Sun Chips one is win.

  36. I would LOVE cold diarrhea. It would be so soothing. It usually burns so bad, I can’t even enjoy the hooker’s expression.

  37. hmm #1 really?
    I kind of like #5

    I’ve never seen sun chips, now I want to try some, mmmm chippies.

    And lol @TerexSyndrome

    @historyprof, (hopefully you really didn’t get it and are not playing with me) the 1st one was saying that because they get all wet and stuff from collecting water that oh they must of been in a water fight, not. Really not cool.

  38. maybe the hooker only does hand jobs, if she was booked for doggy she’s wouldn’t be stable on all fours and keep tipping over and missionary well… you’d have a stump waving in your face

  39. The Sun Chips bag is annoying as hell!

  40. The Sun Chips bag is ok if you’re going to eat them at home where you can pop some in a bowl. Otherwise, I’m tempted to go buy some plastic baggies to transport them in which I guess defeats the purpose of the bag.

  41. Do I have to press 1 for Spanish in Mexico?

  42. We don’t have an official language, but it’s still the dominant language, and I’ll bet you’re all glad that’s the case, even if it isn’t politically correct to say so. Would you want to live in a place where there is no common language? Where nobody understands each other? I think not.

  43. Loretta, I’m not really sure what you are trying to say. But it sounds a bit narrow minded. I live in Australia and I’d love to live somewhere where 2 languages were commonly spoken. I have a friend who is Ethiopia and also grew up in Kenya and he speaks 4 different languages fluently because it was common over there. Which is just AWESOME!

  44. Loretta, It is very sad that people like you that unlike diversity have to attack a certain country. DO more research and you will find out the Mexico is not the only country that speaks spanish. On other hand there are many countries in the world that have different languages not only USA, GO TO ITALY, SPAIN, ASIA, You’ll see what I’m talking about

  45. Loretta, did you know there are FOUR official languages in Switzerland? French, German, Italian and Raheto-Romanic? That in Belgium the population speaks French and Flemmish (Dutch)? That children in Luxembourg receive a TRI-lingual education, while in this country kids can barely learn English? These are just a handful of examples from around the world.

    It is possible for a country to have more than one language spoken by many of its people. Other countries have been doing it for centuries. It might actually benefit most Americans to learn a second language. I mean, how can it hurt? Or is too hard for you?

  46. I have to agree with Daisy for as I live in Belgium.

    Correction: There are 3 official languages in Belgium, Flemmish(Dutch), French & German.

    It has been proven that children who grow up in an environment where different languages make a part of their life, they grow up being better in learning things in a way more faster time than kids who have learned only 1 language.

    Thatsaid, Loretta, you sound like a dumbfuck. Greetings.

  47. Daisy, Belgium has also three official languages, 6 million people speak Dutch (in Flanders), 3 million speak French (in Wallonia), 1 million speak French and Dutch (in Brussels, but the mostly speak French) and 70.000 people speak German in the area Belgium got from Germany after WWI.

  48. the fate of intelligence

    I’m one of the 70.000 people in Belgium that speak German. And I’m learning French an English. And Spanish.
    Wow I’m multi-lingual!
    Not very interesting, I know, but I just had to share it with you.

  49. @Loretta sorry if we ganged up on you a bit

  50. @pinkhobo I agree! Multilingual speakers are fun!

  51. Folk er idioter

    The USA has so many immigrants that one way or the other, you should embrace Spanish and learn it if you have the possibility. But then again, I speak Danish, English, German and Spanish, so I might be biased :)

  52. Actually, in most European and quite a few Asian countries most people are at least bilingual. English is taught as a second or even third language in Scandinavia and most of the northern European countries. Why would it be more difficult for an American to learn a second language than everyone else in the world?

    Could you imagine living in a world where people couldn’t be arsed to learn how to communicate with each other? Dominant language.. Come on… We live in a global community now. Enough with the whining about foreigners.

    “Folk er idioter”.. Jeg kunne ikke være mere enig.

  53. I’m from Belgium and we have 3 language area’s: Dutch, French and German
    We learn all of these at school plus English! A lot of people also study Latin and Greek in school, but that is optional.
    If we can do it, so can America, they just have to put in the effort!
    The younger you start the easier it is.

  54. @GoldenAngel dude get over yourself, the reason you have to learn 4 languages is because you don’t have a language unique to your stupid country, Belgium is one of the most boring places in the world, outside of Brussels you can’t even order dinner at a restaurant after 9 pm, you’re a 3rd world European country comprised of land that the French, Germans and Scandinavians didn’t want, and the only reason any citizen of the world would know about you is because you have great chocolate and 2 decent beers. Sorry to break it to you but you suck!!! The earlier you realize it, the better.

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