Friday, August 20, 2010

Extra Extra Info

previous post: Wins for the Weekends

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109 Comments

  1. im not sure what paracetamol is but maybe scott could try again?

  2. It was less painful then when he tried to commit suicide by eating too many “pain relief” pills…

    Who woulda thunk that?

  3. Take enough paracetamol and it will eventually kill you….

    but that would be after months of excruciatingly painful liver failure…..

    which is a lot of time to spend reconsidering the joys of life…..

    and how you’ve just completely fucked yours up…..

  4. can one actually sneeze a tampon out?

    and though masturbation is totally natural and healthy, I’m not really sure facebook is the proper medium to share one’s adventures with oneself eh? lol

  5. I rabbited on in a post a couple of weeks ago about paracetamol overdose and its sequelae, and now, here is Scott. It seems he’s one of the lucky ones to come through the other side of it.

    But Scott, what are you talking about? Unlucky? Mate, you survived a paracetamol OD, AND it was only your leg ripped open, not your dick.

    Go buy a lottery ticket. I’ll go in on it with you. You are one lucky SOB.

  6. Childbirth is way more painful. Than *anything*.

  7. Paracetamol is the UK name for the drug sold as acetaminophen (Tylenol) in the states. The overdose is pretty terrible.

    BTW– sixith!! bitches!

  8. No way. Passing kidney stones is WAY more painful than childbirth. And yeah, I’ve done both.

  9. @ Pseudonym

    Nah I’ll have to disagree with you there, can you Imagine the entirety that is represented by the abstract notion that is *anything* directed in such a way as to to cause you pain?

    Yeah well neither can I but I bet it stings like a mother.

  10. @greenstrings

    mind=blown.

  11. @ greenstrings… Wow. just wow… If I could’ve understood a word of that I bet I would’ve been massively impressed. But I didn’t, so I’m not.

  12. I love that you can tell Scott was just waiting for somebody to go ‘oh man, why, what’sa up? :( ‘ but nobody cared enough to do so so he just explained it anyway… and still nobody commented, so he had to again, with some kind of boast about his suicide attempt.

    Sounds pretty fucking painful, though.

    And I know my first move after tearing my shin open would be to hop on over to Facebook and try and get people to care.

  13. @ Douchetastic, so have I. But how many times hunnh? hunnh??

  14. LOL! exactly brittishhobo… ya gotta love the attention seekers on FB!

  15. Douchetastic is right about kidney stones on the pain measurement scale. I’ve not experienced it, but it’s definitely at the top of the list. There are other things that rate very highly, but they’re not for discussion on Lamebook.

  16. MsBuzzkillington

    It’s time for someone to change out their tampon.

    Do umbilical cords really just come off like that? I thought they were cut?

  17. Scott’s a scarily lonely fucker who talks to himself on friendface and Zoe makes me want to be sick on the floor.

  18. @MsBuzzkillington

    They do cut the cord to separate the baby from the placenta, but they leave a couple inches where your belly button is because it’s still attached to the baby and would cause a nasty wound if you were to just rip it off. It takes anywhere from a few days to a few weeks to dry up and fall off.

  19. @Lizarella

    So how come white people get innies, and black people get outies?

  20. I’ve seen a few things floating around the internet lately about girls sneezing out their tampons but I’m sure that shouldn’t be able to happen unless you haven’t pushed it in far enough. Can anyone back me up on that?

  21. @emkitteh yeah that’s what i was thinking…. though can anyone even see my posts? they all say “awaiting moderation” wth is up with that?

  22. EmKitt, I’ve talked about it many times. It’s all about the pelvic floor muscles. Do kegels and that kind of thing won’t happen. On the other hand, it could’ve been ready to come it – you know, soaked and heavy. Fuck me, that’s disgusting.

    Anyway, Em, I have to go and vote. Have you done so? Not much chop either of them this go round, but we have to elect one of them. I’ll see what other parties are on offer, and to which of the biggies they’re giving their preferences. Actually, I think there’s a Sex Party. Sounds good to me.

  23. @Soup

    im white with an innie but im pretty sure ive seen white people with outies and black people with innies. it all depends on the method by which the midwife ties the cord, i think (though im not certain of the differences between methods). Some predominantly black or predominantly white cultures in places might only use one of the methods though, im not sure.
    p.s= i wanna rape ya :D

  24. Scott reminds me of Peter Griffin with his last comment.

    Lame.

  25. oooo word, you’re aussie too!
    People joke about voting for the Australian sex party, but apparently they have some pretty good policies. I sent in a postal vote (I much prefer a nice saturday morning sleep-in than having to line up and be hassled by hippies!

    And EmKitteh – it does seem like these girls aren’t putting in the tampon far enough…..but then wouldn’t it be uncomfortable?!

  26. The Sex Party are about better Sex Education in schools, and legalising same sex marriage. Although the only reason @wordpervert mentioned it, is because she is sad and lonely and feels the need to use sexual innuendo in EVERY COMMENT in order to get attention.

  27. @23 no, i think its more to do with her being a pervert as her name suggests.just as how your aura suggests that you’re a massive twat (if i believed in auras that is). anyway there’s nothing wrong with having a dirty mind

  28. The post are meh at best.

    As far as sexual innuendos go, I would say that about 90% of us do the very same thing.

    bago said twats…huh huh huh!

  29. Word, ain’t got nuttin’ on me! I can take a nursery rhyme and make it sexual…. Bad example, thanks to Andrew Dice Clay that’s already been accomplished, but you get the idea.

  30. Chewbacca shagger

    There’s nothing wrong with a dirty mind. I made the little mermaid into a filthy porno over a few beers.
    As for voting, ginger or big ears…hmmm, meh!

  31. @word

    Yup, I just voted. Got a neat little purple sticker out of the bargain too. And don’t worry, my pelvic floor is in tip-top shape.

    @wahface

    I reckon lining up on election day is half the fun, although I must admit this atrocious headcold is making me reconsider that theory.

  32. Today’s Porno Birthday is a special one. Let’s give it up for:

    Barbara Summer – 33 – This chick has been fondled by more men than a Soup’s penis in over 212 fine films including:

    - Girth Wind And Fire
    - All You Can eat 3
    - Throat Yogurt
    - Hot Bods And Tailpipe 30
    - Ass Wreckage
    - Out Numbered
    - Black In Crack, Black In The Back
    - Asses of Face Destruction 8
    - Anally Yours
    - All Holes No Poles 5
    - Itty Bitty Titty Cummittiee 6
    - Hot Fudge Suckday

    Lets hear it for Barbara and Soups penis!

  33. Umm.. I have been reading these posts for a long time (and occasionally contributing), and most of the innuendo is funny and relevant, makes me laugh regularly. Some of it is just attention-seeking crap, especially when it is every comment, and totally irrelevant.

  34. according to one of my old school teachers, Jack and Jill was sexual anyway. it was a tale of a member of royalty and his secret lover having a scandalous affair. the bit where they fall down was a metaphor for their fall from grace when their affair was discovered
    and the line “Jack went to bed, to mend his head with vinegar and brown paper” (from the second verse in the full version) is apparently one big euphanism but he wouldn’t say what for. the only way i can think of it as being a euphanism is if “head” is refering to his helmet and he is going to bed to “mend” (rub) it better with “vinegar” (lube) and i dunno bout the brown paper, perhaps a tissue to wipe away the end result of all the rubbing better?

  35. Oh yeah.. better vote today.

    Also, kidney stones hurt like a mofo. Plus unlike childbirth there’s nothing to look forward to afterwards, except no longer being in excruciating pain.

  36. Nothing is more painful than being married.

  37. OMG 33 posts and nobody even mentions the pickle shits post! The last time I ate an entire jar of pickles I just ended up throwing them up, I guess thats because I didn’t chug the pickle juice!

    “Alex” must have been really frigging thirsty to drink all that vinegar, he should have just drank his own urine to get the same effect.

  38. Anyone actually vote for the Sex Party? It seems like neither major party actually has the balls to address the real issues.

    Unless you count “OMFG WE HAVE TO STOP THE EVIL IMMIGRANTS”

  39. @bago: The way I understood it was:

    jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high, unzipped his fly and Jill said I don’t wanna. Up got Jack, so very fast he whacked, while Jill smoked his ganja. His face turned red, when Jill made fun of his head, and he said bitch I would of had to paper bag ya.

  40. The Sex Party actually seem to have some fairly sensible ideas. I’m not sure that they could build a comprehensive platform that addresses enough of the issues to win many voters but it seems like the stuff they’ve got is good.

    I reckon this one will be pretty close, but I’m pegging Labor.

  41. @mtc – Dey tuk er jerbs!

  42. Labor is a lucky dude.

    Nice work, defective.

  43. wahface, you’re correct the Sex Party has solid policies.

    Responding or not responding to a comment like #23 is a no-win situation. If I say nothing, it looks like I’m having others speak for me, and if I do say something, it’ll probably coax out more bitches like #23. Shitty, either way.

    I won’t get into arguments/debates on LB, nor do I target individuals I don’t like. I come to LB for laughs.

    The assumption I’m sad & lonely is a grossly incorrect one, but I can’t prove it, so my defence of that is redundant.

    As for attention-seeking? Anyone who comments on a forum like this or any other, is, by the very act of doing so, seeking some form of attention. Nobody can tell me differently.

    And as for sexual innuendo? Well yes, I use lots of it, but not in every comment, but the selective reading some use will have them vehemently disagreeing with that.

    See? It’s a no-win.

    wahface, you’re correct. The Sex Party has solid policies.

    EmKitt, good for you.

  44. wahface, I agreed with you so much, I said it twice.

  45. #40 That was a rather convoluted way of saying “Fuck you, I won’t take the bait.”

  46. First off, Sex Party and solid.

    I didn’t see anybody really stick up for ya. Just that we all pretty much do the same.

    Lastly, stick up.

  47. I’d say it was a convoluted way of saying rockinghorsefly is a twat. By which she’d be right. But whatever, I’m sure needlessly attacking somebody for no reason whatsoever has made him feel great and he definitely won’t be back to childishly insult other people (…pretty much just me with all the rude words. I’m all angered tonight) for calling him out on aforementioned twatiness.

    Wait, no, THAT was the convoluted way of saying he’s a twat.

    On another note, why the hell was my first thought about this post’how the hell do you sneeze a tampon out of your nose’? I’m ashamed that my mind went there first.

  48. God damn it, I rose to the bait. And in a boring wordy rant, too. My apologies.

  49. Maybe half five in the morning is the point where it just becomes retarded to still be awake.

  50. Oh and for future reference, of course we are going to stick up for you word. We love you and your innuendos.

  51. Actually Hobes, due to a previous post,(see Wins for the Weekend) I found out that rocking is actually a she. Not that it takes away from her twatiness.

  52. Hobes, just by the by, do you know my name has nothing whatsoever to do with me being a pervert? Some may think that, but it’s not. Just a little aside there. I’m angry, too, but mostly because it won’t really matter to us Aussies who wins the election tonight. Neither party is bringing much.

    With regard to going to a tampon-out-the-nose scenario – it’s not such a stretch. Some people use small tampons to stem bleeding noses. Get some sleep, buddy.

  53. And thanks for that, defective, but you know you don’t really need any thanks from me. We’re as solid as The Sex Party.

  54. Not me, defective. I’m sick of all the nasty sex talk. I much prefer internet debates over religion and obesity. The truly important matters that face us as a people. Like if god was really, really fat, would he still be able to see his own cock?

    @bagofknackers
    How can you rape a willing participant? But be forewarned, due to my proclivities, your strap-on better be ENORMOUS. Otherwise, it’ll just be like being an expert at the game of Operation.

  55. Okay you have peaked my curiosity, I’m going to have to Google The Sex Party. I’m sure it will take me down a road that I will not return from for a couple of hours. But I am willing to brave through it.

    - Peaked

  56. I know you’re not addressing me, Soup, but just for future reference, my strap-on is steady as a rock, but it’d definitely still touch your sides.

  57. But seeing as though you’re sick of all the sex talk, I’ll retract that last statement. I should be musing over the demise of some lowly rat instead.

  58. Word, I have no doubt that your equipment is top notch. I’m just trying to make sure all the other lads and ladies are up to snuff.

    You’re like the straight A student: Although you’re the best, sometimes you will get ignored in order to provide instruction to others. It’s the curse of excelling at what you do.

  59. @Soup: First off, of course he could see his cock. He is god… So his cock is enormous.

    You remind me of a troll that a lot of people don’t understand in here….Hmmmmmmm.

  60. It’s true. I was actually yoink.

    And I think you’re wrong. God was the first of the over-compensaters. They didn’t have Hummers back then, so he created an entire species just to worship him. We are only here because he has a tiny winky.

  61. Well the one I was thinking of is still trolling. But I will keep my thoughts to myself. A simple wink will suffice.

    I think you’re right. This would explain a lot actually. Satan is the one with the Black Serpent after all.

  62. LOL, word, you have to check this out. Thai coverage of the Australian election.

  63. Defective, no no no. You don’t get off that easy. If you’re going to make a claim, you need to back it up. I would like to hear your theory.

  64. Okay, if that is what you want.

    I think you are dan_fargis.You both have the same sick and twisted sense of humor. 97% of the time both of you stop in to say one thing and never here from you again for the rest of the thread. Unless it is something you can work with and then you run with it extremely well as we demonstrated with the previous thread. You have a pegina and he has a vagenis, and I want to beat the brakes off of both of your guy’s sexual organs.

  65. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RQ_s6V1Kv6A

  66. Wow, I am a retard. Totally forgot to paste the link.

  67. Thanks, Em. That will be more entertaining than anything in tonight’s coverage, and TOTALLY more entertaining than anything ahead of us for the next 3 years.

    Strap yourself in, Em, it’s gonna be a bumpy few years.

  68. Speaking of links, I Googled the ASP. This adverisment is freaking hilarious.

    http://www.sexparty.org.au/

    I have been posting a lot of links lately.

  69. That’s funny stuff Em.

  70. Interesting theory. I will neither confirm nor deny, because it will be more fun that way. But you can work over my junk anytime you want.

  71. You heard him queenie. I’m next.

  72. I checked the ASP policies. I like all of them except the drug department and stuff like Viagra receiving price cuts from social security (if it works like that in Australia). Do they have any chance to get an important representation?

    Also, nobody cares about Scott and I bet that, one minute after he posted the paracetamol thing he was going to say “Well actually, it was more painful when I cut my right foot while playing baseball with the chainsaw”.

  73. @vabadus

    The Australian Sex Party don’t have a chance at forming government, at least this time around, but any members they get into Parliament will have a chance to vote against any legislation that they don’t agree with, so there is potential to make a difference.

    @defectiveuser

    Are you an Aussie? That JerkChoices ad didn’t get to air on tv, except on a political commentary show called Gruen Nation. However, from what I’ve seen, their viral marketing strategy has been pretty effective.

  74. That’s what I meant, some kind of important representation so they can turn the tides when voting for new laws.

    I’ll keep an eye on the results of the elections.

  75. Heh.
    I’m Australian too, and it seems pretty much down to a fraction of a percent at the moment.
    Though, the general consensus where I live (Willetton, actually) is “anything that isn’t Liberal”. For example, this facebook event:
    http://img5.glowfoto.com/images/2010/08/21-0251495736L.jpg

  76. @ defective

    surely as someone who is both eloquent, and has devoted his life to lampooning the bible, sensible madness is a better candidate for fargis?

    however, you’re right, soup is definitely someone with the kind of sleight of hand needed for a fargis.

    i’d never really considered fargis might be someone else before. it’s fun.

    maybe, maybe, soup and sensible madness are the same person….?

  77. ah, conspiracy theory, the last refuge of the bored and disaffected.

    excuse me while i go and wank over my princess diana photo collection.

  78. Why do people think shit like this is socially acceptable?

  79. why do you think your face is socially acceptable?

  80. It’s not, that’s why he/she is on Lamebook.

  81. Amen defect and the name Anders makes me think of Peter Andre which is NEVER a good thing

  82. No Em, I’m a pathetic American. I have been down under a few times if that counts for anything.

    Actually alord, about a year ago when I started coming in here I thought about that possibility. I quickly came to the conclusion that I was wrong. Soup and Sensible have different styles about them the same as you and me. Sensible has, well, sensible humor that does seem to work extremely well for him/her. We all know that Soup’s humor is a different level of twisted. As you read between the lines in fargis’ post, you can see that he is just as sick.(Not that I’m complaining, I’m huge fans of both.)

    Oh and to be honest with you, Soup couldn’t of been yoink. I have pretty big faith in that.

  83. I wonder if Scott voted for the Australian Sex Party. And then tried to get people to care about that fact.

    On the crappy topic of yoink, what happened to that girl who eloquently claimed to have been yoink? Did she ever even come back?

  84. hobo,

    she’s now anonisgayisgay.

    real talk.

  85. Oh shit, will we ever be safe from that girl with her fancy words and her clever impressions of total asshats?

  86. i suspect not.

  87. Is there a Willetton anywhere else? Coz I’m hoping people don’t associate Western Australia with odd people like that…

  88. I got a kick out of theartistformerlyknownasyoink, alas, she had said she would be gone permanently from then on forward.
    Also, this entire comments section has been one of the funniest in a while. Jerk Choice!

  89. Well! I do seem to have offended everybody! My apologies Wordpervert, election day must just make me intolerant and irritable! Everyone else: Isn’t it a little hypocritical to have a go at me for having a go at someone else? I have never been called a twat by so many people before. :-)

  90. Yeah I’m turning over a new leaf and going back to my old style. I miss it a bit and don’t care for the drama this one causes me.

    would you prefer twit? ;)

  91. Twit is a fairly mild insult, I can live with that! ;-)

  92. rockinghorsefly, apology accepted.

  93. maybe in this spirit of tolerance and mutual appreciation, someone could tell mass to get that big dick out of his ass and stop sniping at me. if you dislike me, that’s fine. but either say nothing, or say something funny.

    the little unimaginative digs i get from you on most posts mean i just end up putting you in the same category as anon, and i KNOW you’re cleverer than that. ;)

    also – good move rockinghorse – trying to take down word is like trying to get a good shot at predator! plus she’s a very good egg. :)

  94. Peace reigns again, thanks Wordpervert! Promise I won’t come on here all moody again… ;-) For future reference, would I have had a better chance at taking you down Alordslums? Especially as it appears I would have Mass on side?? Your clever comments make me giggle too much to try it, though! :-)

  95. rockinghorsefly, apologies for my big outburst. Your attack on word just seemed kinda… unwarranted :P But you’ve apologized, so I don’t wanna seem like I’m still trying to kick up a fight. Just explaining why I called you a twat and imemdiately tried to cover myself by blaming it on a lack of sleep because it seemed a little bit harsh. :) :P

  96. God damn :p smilie.

  97. Or :P smilie…

  98. Screw all this hate. Lets do something that will peak everyone’s interest. Here is you Porno Birthday:

    Lacie Heart-24-This girl has stuffed more twinkies in her mouth than Soup’s wife in 174 fine films including:

    - Best of Incumming
    - Cum Fuck Them Young
    - My First Porn 8
    - Creampies Anyone?
    - Poon Raider(Tomb Raider)
    - Sleepy Swallows
    - Star Whores
    - The Incredible Expanding Vagina
    - Internal Combustion
    - Best of Outgoing

    That has been your Porno Birthday!

  99. I’m enjoying your Porno Birthday thing. I hope Lamebook hire you and make it a regular feature.

  100. Well I missed yesterday due to some family problems. But if you and others would like that to be the case, Email Lamebook about it.

  101. hooray for Porno Birthday ^_^

  102. BritishHobo, re: #92 Thanks for the apology. Your initial post was so convoluted, I had to read it twice just to be sure you were actually calling me a twat! :-)

  103. I try. That way if somebody gets offended I can just pretend I was insulting somebody else.

  104. mass has a large member in his rear requiring extrication?

    I don’t think so, alord.

    But in the “spirit of tolerance and mutual appreciation”, I’ll say I have much fondness for the both of you.

  105. In the spirit of tolerance and appreciation, I pity you hapless bunch of convictionless, spineless layabouts. As I was scanning these lazy comments the field of yellow blobs from 86 to 94 made me gag. And your porno birthday crap is just one example of the way you worship degradation, sloth, and big herpes infected wangs at the expense of your sense of justice and positively-slanted greed.

  106. And defectiveuse, as you lack the intelligence to understand anything I say, please just dismiss my comment as trolling and carry on in your merry porno birthday crappy way.

  107. Zoe is rather dull and unimaginative…try sneezing a jam rag IN Zoe, then you boast about it!

    Scott is clearly incorrect in his assumption that he is the unluckiest fellow in the whole of Willetton, he has clearly not counted either of his parents, his best mates and basically any poor fucker who has the misfortune to know his acquaintance.

  108. Fuck me – It’s Monday, I have man-flu, have smoked too much cheeba, drunk too much alcohol and I am greeted by this emoticon overload.

    Not cool people, not cool at all. You’re all twats/twits.

  109. Awww look, I have fan.

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