I love that you can tell Scott was just waiting for somebody to go ‘oh man, why, what’sa up? ‘ but nobody cared enough to do so so he just explained it anyway… and still nobody commented, so he had to again, with some kind of boast about his suicide attempt.
Sounds pretty fucking painful, though.
And I know my first move after tearing my shin open would be to hop on over to Facebook and try and get people to care.
Douchetastic is right about kidney stones on the pain measurement scale. I’ve not experienced it, but it’s definitely at the top of the list. There are other things that rate very highly, but they’re not for discussion on Lamebook.
They do cut the cord to separate the baby from the placenta, but they leave a couple inches where your belly button is because it’s still attached to the baby and would cause a nasty wound if you were to just rip it off. It takes anywhere from a few days to a few weeks to dry up and fall off.
I’ve seen a few things floating around the internet lately about girls sneezing out their tampons but I’m sure that shouldn’t be able to happen unless you haven’t pushed it in far enough. Can anyone back me up on that?
EmKitt, I’ve talked about it many times. It’s all about the pelvic floor muscles. Do kegels and that kind of thing won’t happen. On the other hand, it could’ve been ready to come it – you know, soaked and heavy. Fuck me, that’s disgusting.
Anyway, Em, I have to go and vote. Have you done so? Not much chop either of them this go round, but we have to elect one of them. I’ll see what other parties are on offer, and to which of the biggies they’re giving their preferences. Actually, I think there’s a Sex Party. Sounds good to me.
im white with an innie but im pretty sure ive seen white people with outies and black people with innies. it all depends on the method by which the midwife ties the cord, i think (though im not certain of the differences between methods). Some predominantly black or predominantly white cultures in places might only use one of the methods though, im not sure.
p.s= i wanna rape ya
oooo word, you’re aussie too!
People joke about voting for the Australian sex party, but apparently they have some pretty good policies. I sent in a postal vote (I much prefer a nice saturday morning sleep-in than having to line up and be hassled by hippies!
And EmKitteh – it does seem like these girls aren’t putting in the tampon far enough…..but then wouldn’t it be uncomfortable?!
The Sex Party are about better Sex Education in schools, and legalising same sex marriage. Although the only reason @wordpervert mentioned it, is because she is sad and lonely and feels the need to use sexual innuendo in EVERY COMMENT in order to get attention.
@23 no, i think its more to do with her being a pervert as her name suggests.just as how your aura suggests that you’re a massive twat (if i believed in auras that is). anyway there’s nothing wrong with having a dirty mind
Today’s Porno Birthday is a special one. Let’s give it up for:
Barbara Summer – 33 – This chick has been fondled by more men than a Soup’s penis in over 212 fine films including:
- Girth Wind And Fire
- All You Can eat 3
- Throat Yogurt
- Hot Bods And Tailpipe 30
- Ass Wreckage
- Out Numbered
- Black In Crack, Black In The Back
- Asses of Face Destruction 8
- Anally Yours
- All Holes No Poles 5
- Itty Bitty Titty Cummittiee 6
- Hot Fudge Suckday
Umm.. I have been reading these posts for a long time (and occasionally contributing), and most of the innuendo is funny and relevant, makes me laugh regularly. Some of it is just attention-seeking crap, especially when it is every comment, and totally irrelevant.
according to one of my old school teachers, Jack and Jill was sexual anyway. it was a tale of a member of royalty and his secret lover having a scandalous affair. the bit where they fall down was a metaphor for their fall from grace when their affair was discovered
and the line “Jack went to bed, to mend his head with vinegar and brown paper” (from the second verse in the full version) is apparently one big euphanism but he wouldn’t say what for. the only way i can think of it as being a euphanism is if “head” is refering to his helmet and he is going to bed to “mend” (rub) it better with “vinegar” (lube) and i dunno bout the brown paper, perhaps a tissue to wipe away the end result of all the rubbing better?
jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high, unzipped his fly and Jill said I don’t wanna. Up got Jack, so very fast he whacked, while Jill smoked his ganja. His face turned red, when Jill made fun of his head, and he said bitch I would of had to paper bag ya.
The Sex Party actually seem to have some fairly sensible ideas. I’m not sure that they could build a comprehensive platform that addresses enough of the issues to win many voters but it seems like the stuff they’ve got is good.
I reckon this one will be pretty close, but I’m pegging Labor.
wahface, you’re correct the Sex Party has solid policies.
Responding or not responding to a comment like #23 is a no-win situation. If I say nothing, it looks like I’m having others speak for me, and if I do say something, it’ll probably coax out more bitches like #23. Shitty, either way.
I won’t get into arguments/debates on LB, nor do I target individuals I don’t like. I come to LB for laughs.
The assumption I’m sad & lonely is a grossly incorrect one, but I can’t prove it, so my defence of that is redundant.
As for attention-seeking? Anyone who comments on a forum like this or any other, is, by the very act of doing so, seeking some form of attention. Nobody can tell me differently.
And as for sexual innuendo? Well yes, I use lots of it, but not in every comment, but the selective reading some use will have them vehemently disagreeing with that.
See? It’s a no-win.
wahface, you’re correct. The Sex Party has solid policies.
I’d say it was a convoluted way of saying rockinghorsefly is a twat. By which she’d be right. But whatever, I’m sure needlessly attacking somebody for no reason whatsoever has made him feel great and he definitely won’t be back to childishly insult other people (…pretty much just me with all the rude words. I’m all angered tonight) for calling him out on aforementioned twatiness.
Wait, no, THAT was the convoluted way of saying he’s a twat.
On another note, why the hell was my first thought about this post’how the hell do you sneeze a tampon out of your nose’? I’m ashamed that my mind went there first.
Hobes, just by the by, do you know my name has nothing whatsoever to do with me being a pervert? Some may think that, but it’s not. Just a little aside there. I’m angry, too, but mostly because it won’t really matter to us Aussies who wins the election tonight. Neither party is bringing much.
With regard to going to a tampon-out-the-nose scenario – it’s not such a stretch. Some people use small tampons to stem bleeding noses. Get some sleep, buddy.
Not me, defective. I’m sick of all the nasty sex talk. I much prefer internet debates over religion and obesity. The truly important matters that face us as a people. Like if god was really, really fat, would he still be able to see his own cock?
How can you rape a willing participant? But be forewarned, due to my proclivities, your strap-on better be ENORMOUS. Otherwise, it’ll just be like being an expert at the game of Operation.
Okay you have peaked my curiosity, I’m going to have to Google The Sex Party. I’m sure it will take me down a road that I will not return from for a couple of hours. But I am willing to brave through it.
And I think you’re wrong. God was the first of the over-compensaters. They didn’t have Hummers back then, so he created an entire species just to worship him. We are only here because he has a tiny winky.
I think you are dan_fargis.You both have the same sick and twisted sense of humor. 97% of the time both of you stop in to say one thing and never here from you again for the rest of the thread. Unless it is something you can work with and then you run with it extremely well as we demonstrated with the previous thread. You have a pegina and he has a vagenis, and I want to beat the brakes off of both of your guy’s sexual organs.
I checked the ASP policies. I like all of them except the drug department and stuff like Viagra receiving price cuts from social security (if it works like that in Australia). Do they have any chance to get an important representation?
Also, nobody cares about Scott and I bet that, one minute after he posted the paracetamol thing he was going to say “Well actually, it was more painful when I cut my right foot while playing baseball with the chainsaw”.
The Australian Sex Party don’t have a chance at forming government, at least this time around, but any members they get into Parliament will have a chance to vote against any legislation that they don’t agree with, so there is potential to make a difference.
Are you an Aussie? That JerkChoices ad didn’t get to air on tv, except on a political commentary show called Gruen Nation. However, from what I’ve seen, their viral marketing strategy has been pretty effective.
No Em, I’m a pathetic American. I have been down under a few times if that counts for anything.
Actually alord, about a year ago when I started coming in here I thought about that possibility. I quickly came to the conclusion that I was wrong. Soup and Sensible have different styles about them the same as you and me. Sensible has, well, sensible humor that does seem to work extremely well for him/her. We all know that Soup’s humor is a different level of twisted. As you read between the lines in fargis’ post, you can see that he is just as sick.(Not that I’m complaining, I’m huge fans of both.)
Oh and to be honest with you, Soup couldn’t of been yoink. I have pretty big faith in that.
I got a kick out of theartistformerlyknownasyoink, alas, she had said she would be gone permanently from then on forward.
Also, this entire comments section has been one of the funniest in a while. Jerk Choice!
Well! I do seem to have offended everybody! My apologies Wordpervert, election day must just make me intolerant and irritable! Everyone else: Isn’t it a little hypocritical to have a go at me for having a go at someone else? I have never been called a twat by so many people before.
maybe in this spirit of tolerance and mutual appreciation, someone could tell mass to get that big dick out of his ass and stop sniping at me. if you dislike me, that’s fine. but either say nothing, or say something funny.
the little unimaginative digs i get from you on most posts mean i just end up putting you in the same category as anon, and i KNOW you’re cleverer than that.
also – good move rockinghorse – trying to take down word is like trying to get a good shot at predator! plus she’s a very good egg.
Peace reigns again, thanks Wordpervert! Promise I won’t come on here all moody again… For future reference, would I have had a better chance at taking you down Alordslums? Especially as it appears I would have Mass on side?? Your clever comments make me giggle too much to try it, though!
rockinghorsefly, apologies for my big outburst. Your attack on word just seemed kinda… unwarranted But you’ve apologized, so I don’t wanna seem like I’m still trying to kick up a fight. Just explaining why I called you a twat and imemdiately tried to cover myself by blaming it on a lack of sleep because it seemed a little bit harsh. :P
Screw all this hate. Lets do something that will peak everyone’s interest. Here is you Porno Birthday:
Lacie Heart-24-This girl has stuffed more twinkies in her mouth than Soup’s wife in 174 fine films including:
- Best of Incumming
- Cum Fuck Them Young
- My First Porn 8
- Creampies Anyone?
- Poon Raider(Tomb Raider)
- Sleepy Swallows
- Star Whores
- The Incredible Expanding Vagina
- Internal Combustion
- Best of Outgoing
In the spirit of tolerance and appreciation, I pity you hapless bunch of convictionless, spineless layabouts. As I was scanning these lazy comments the field of yellow blobs from 86 to 94 made me gag. And your porno birthday crap is just one example of the way you worship degradation, sloth, and big herpes infected wangs at the expense of your sense of justice and positively-slanted greed.
Zoe is rather dull and unimaginative…try sneezing a jam rag IN Zoe, then you boast about it!
Scott is clearly incorrect in his assumption that he is the unluckiest fellow in the whole of Willetton, he has clearly not counted either of his parents, his best mates and basically any poor fucker who has the misfortune to know his acquaintance.