Wednesday, November 17, 2010

EXed Out

previous post: Quick Wins

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61 Comments

  1. Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuude that is awsome!

    I wasent expecting Kathy to show up in that conversation in the end.

    … Man he just left for college? haha she must be around 20!

    On a side note;

    WTF Koory?

  2. Stolen from FML: http://www.fmylife.com/miscellaneous/13850566

  3. Oh dear Matt, THAT’S JUST LIFE.

    It’s not fair, it’s what it is.

    But yea, it sucks.

    Garrett is the real loser here, starts talking about street whores :o

  4. @boomstick: how can it be stolen? It’s very likely one and the same person. Next time think before posting stupid accusations

  5. jr88, you’re joking…. right?

  6. @qsdmlk This is the second time today the sites have overlapped, you fucking retard. Somebody is getting fucked with and you are stupid enough to fall for it.

  7. @Lulz I think they’re being sarcastic…hopefully. I had a feeling Kathy would pop up after reading about it, to further satisfy herself. Sick bitch.

  8. vaginalroundhouse

    They can ram jam her together.

  9. Talk about an awkward threesome…

  10. She’s going to become a SMIHF (pronounced like Smith just with an “F” at the end) – Step Mom I Have Fucked.

  11. This little story reads like a standard plot-line from every daytime soap on television. I bet she’ll fuck Matt again at some stage, and then it’ll be a “Who’s the father?” situation. Then they’ll go on Maury to find out.

  12. @wordy

    Or she’ll develop a brain tumor and Matt’s long-hidden lust for her will rise to the surface again at her bedside – leading to a fight between him and his father (it’s also possible he’ll find out he has a twin brother in the process).

  13. Yes, that might just happen, Comments. You know, I take back the Maury bit. In true soap style, they’ll do the whole DNA thing, but she’ll break into the Doctor’s office and switch the blood samples – or something like that. Then she’ll recover from that lethal brain tumour, divorce dirty old dad, and marry Matt’s long-lost twin brother – or something like that. This drama has some potential legs.

  14. Indeed Wordy, I believe we’ve just set the main plot point of the first season of “As The Lame Turns”.

  15. She’ll have the baby in a broken-down elevator, in a power outage, during a snowstorm, with no cell phone signal.

  16. Comments, I like.

    pol, lol.

  17. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    This was an okay post, but it had 68 likes so I had to click like.

  18. And they all live happily ever after.

  19. Nah dudes…she’s 18. And LB changed the age of the dad. He’s 39.

  20. Curly, I think you meant dysfunctionally ever after.

  21. Haha if you go on facebook and type this status in “search everyone” you can find it. And ew, even if LB did change his dad to 39, Kathy is still 18!

  22. I can’t find it. I am sad.

  23. @boomstick: thanks for pointing out the conspiracy. I get it now. Somebody read an FML, then acted out that situation on his facebook, together with at least 5 different friends who all played along with it. Maybe he even made 6 fake profiles. And finally, he posted it on lamebook. Yes it is truly the perfect crime.

    Or could it be that someone just posted the same story on his facebook and on FML? No THAT would be crazy. Asshole

  24. The situation is super weird, a little gross, but I feel like Kathy should be able to date who she wants without people calling her a street whore…

  25. even if you were in that situation, why the fuck would you comment on the status? and thats disturbing on so many levels… ew does that mean Kathy was in high school when she was seeing Matt’s father.. gross..

    GOLD DIGGERRR

  26. also pretty sure that was illegal at some point in the past…

  27. JennLovesAppleSauce

    For one, Lamebook BUTCHERED it.
    Matt’s dad is 39 not 49 and they totally just cut out other comments..
    Oh and this Kathy girl is only 18, she isn’t even old enough to drink (in the US) And she is some white-washed asian chick.. (not being racist)

    Also for people thinking this is a “conspiracy theory” it really isn’t after a bit of creeping (not really, we are separated by 6 people in the end) I found out that they are indeed engaged and it’s all legit.. which grossed me out.

    Dear Mr. and Soon-To-Be Mrs. Larry B
    WTF?

    Love, common sense.

  28. Ya…saying “not being racist” doesn’t mean a fucking thing there. That’s still a racist comment, and you’re a moron.

    And I’m a bit confused at how lamebook is ripping off FML here. Is it so crazy to think that maybe this Matt guy knows what FML is and made a post?

  29. His profile is public, it’s legit.

  30. You are all so charming. I’d like to gather all of you together in a nice burlap sack and drown you like adorable kittens.

  31. Does anyone else see a porno in the making here? Of course I see a porno in the making in virtually any situation so I could be wrong….

  32. Oh my god I can’t stop reading their profiles. They are engaged, and she moved in with the family while dating the son, and then starting hooking up with the father. Throw in an aunt who keep quoting the scripture, the dad commenting on the other status and having the ex in his profile picture, and a profile picture of the ex in a robe in pigtails with someone commenting “cute but who took this?” and the ex answers “matt’s dad” holy shit

  33. Am I the only one that can’t find these people on facebook? :-/

  34. yes.

  35. @jonjones yes!!!! i spent a good 45 min lurking and- holy shit – those bath robe pictures are beyond creepy. her hair in pigtails too? this guy was probably screwing her before she turned 18. where are her guardians?!!!

  36. Ugh. How do you go about finding this on Facebook? Luck?

  37. just search for the status message and select “search everyones posts” its beyond insane. she was living in their house! gaaah its so gross

    the dad commented Matt I am sorry you found out through Facebook but I didn’t think you would answer the phone if I called anyways. Definitely sucks that I can’t talk to you or have your support in this move in my life. But as you have stated today, You will not talk to me until I apologize in writing for the wrongs I have committed. So even though I have extended my hand to you to work things out, instead you have posted things on this social network so your friends can comment on things they know Nothing about. You disrespect me, Kathy and Your Aunt Mary to the world and expect me to feel sorry for you?

    and then some awesome person posted “IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT WE KNOW. WE KNOW IT’S YOUR SON’S EX-GIRLFRIEND AND THAT’S ALL THAT MATTERS. Oh my God.”

  38. After lurking their pages for the better part of 5 minutes, I was struck by how much fucking farmville this chick plays. Holy shit.

    Oh yeah, both of them are disgusting and terrible, too.

  39. Aaaaaand of course Kathy (aka jailbait) is a Christian Republican… good thing they are the ‘moral’ right. LMAO

  40. Dad is a hero. Maybe a shitty father, but kids are fleeting. Love is forever.

  41. I think you mean ‘fresh young pussy is forever’, Soup. The dad is a slimeball. :P

  42. Kathy is very pretty. And that Mary chick talks a bunch of bs. After lookin at his profile , I feel bad for him. His dad seems like an a hole!

  43. Seems like someone has too much time on their hands.. Farmville galore !

  44. Foxy, just because your heart is a dried up prune, and you don’t know how to love, that doesn’t mean that an older man can’t find his soul mate in an 18 year old Asian girl. My penis is weeping at the beauty of it all.

  45. This was an enjoyable post, comments included. Thank you, Lamebook.

    I kinda hope Matt and Mary start fucking. If she’s Larry’s sister it would be a sweet revenge.

    Then they could have a sex tape war, starting with Matt and Kathy at a kegger last fall.

    (They’re all good Christian Republicans, which means they’re always good for hot, nasty sex.)

  46. Update: Aunt Mary recently posted “PURPLE!! AWESOME!! Rocken the purple power!!!” on Matt’s page. It’s started already.

  47. Ok I’ve been talked into stalking them …. here goes!

  48. Well I guess i’m a shit stalker.

  49. ? You like to watch it get cold and dry up?

    Do you ever get close enough to smell it? to touch it?
    Do you hide in the cupboard? or like it O natural?

    Do you wait for the bugs to get into it and fornicate?

  50. Lol, I walked right into that one … well done Scuzz ;)

  51. This girl is so dumb! But I am prejudice toward people who use “txt tlk.” The weird thing is his dad is MARRYING her, that’s the bizarre part. I predict that he will be a very controlling husband and always be jealous of her peers who will hit on her. Also, this chick has like 1200 friends and hardly any feedback on her stuff, that’s odd. And finally, creepiest comment from the dad on a picture of them (presumably from graduation) “Beautiful lil Rose. Was a Great day watching you Graduate. So Proud of You!” *CRINGE*

    Okay /creepystalking.

  52. Over the past 32 hours, I have written, produced and directed the porno based on this incident…now all I need is a title….best title will get a producers credit!

  53. Lamebook, I say this as your friend. Kind of. More of an aquaintance, really. Or someone who used to be your real close friend in high school, but then you kind of became an asshole a little bit, or you got really into drugs, and got in with the wrong crowd, or you started sleeping with other guy’s girlfriends, and then you totally tried it on with mine, so I pretty much just stopped hanging out with you altogether, and then a few years later, I… the fuck?

    Anyway.
    I’m all with you guys on this whole court case thing. Mark Zuckerberg’s only redeeming feature is that he’s Jesse Eisenberg, and that’s only movie-Zuckerberg, so the real guy doesn’t even have that, he’s just an asshole. But maybe you guys would have a better moral ground if you didn’t keep forgetting to blur out people’s names, or if you stopped editing posts to make them seem funnier.

  54. Their facebooks are actually so interesting, it’s like watching a soap opera. Considering bookmarking their pages to watch this all unfold…:$

  55. apparently she might have cancer

  56. Yeah, I’m sure this guy (or the one on FML) is the ONLY GUY EVER to have their ex-gf leave him for his dad. Aren’t like half of all Jerry Springer episodes based on this same story? They can’t ALL be fake…?

  57. has anyone else noticed that under her “children”, it says “Puppy Deebo :) ”!???? someone, please tell me it’s not actually a child being listed there!!!!

    WTF, and Farmville!?
    sheesh!

    all i have to say is, “wow, good job ‘dad’, at least we know you’ll be fucking your son’s sloppy seconds!!”. hope he feels great about himself. what a loser!

  58. Lulz, no, i’m not joking, why do you think that?

  59. I would be so furious if my dad did that and he had a lot of money(which this guy doesn’t appear to have). Just disown him and work hard and make a shit tonne of cash and rub it in their face. She works at Red Lobster, so she’s rollin. I added her as a friend. Just said I play farmville lots, haha.

  60. I never stalked a stranger before but holy shit this is getting entertaining. Matt’s mom is pretty fuckin sexy as far as I can tell from the profile pic. She appears to be wearing elf ears along with a sexy old costume (renaissance maybe?) standing next to a wicker hippie. So I’m assuming shes either a Role Player or renaissance fair employee.
    I feel bad for this guy. His dad is marrying his hot young asian ex girlfriend(I hope I can get some hot young asian pussy when I’m 39, just sayin). His mom is a Role Player(possibly). I’m gonna call my parents and thank them for just being a plain old normal couple.

  61. I did look for this status message on everyone’s posts but had no success. Advice please?

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