Tuesday, September 22, 2009

DONEaven

doneaven

previous post: Giant Buzzkill

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66 Comments

  1. Break up by sms and then rub it in on FB – what a man!

  2. I feel like these are the multiple personalities of one person talking amongst themselves.

  3. I concur with Jamie.

  4. Thank god they didn’t breed.

  5. Breaking up is hard to do.

  6. The real crime here is that his parents couldn’t even spell Donovan.

  7. They dated for 6 hours, book it.

  8. Awwwwwwwwwww poor Dani :(

  9. haha

    I can’t believe kids are breaking up through facebook.

  10. I wonder if facebook organises divorces?

  11. Sofia, are you sure they’re kids? They say they never see each other, but if they were in school together, they’d see each other every day…

  12. What a gutless pansy.

    Real men have the balls to at least CALL and break up.

  13. Real men shouldn’t even need to call, since women should be in the damn kitchen where they belong.

  14. lol @ Rave

  15. Where will admin take this? Racism isn’t allowed but sexism is?

  16. Even though it was vaguely amusing.

  17. I’ve heard far wittier sexist comments than that old one. LOL

  18. I’m guessing the text was sent 1.2 seconds before the status was updated.

    You’ve got to give Dani gutsy points for seeing that her boyfriend now calls himself free and publicly asking for clarification. Although maybe the line between “gutsy” and “oblivious” is too close to call.

  19. Who does this?

  20. Haha, buttsexism.

  21. Am I the only one that’s a bit… ummm… unsure about this post being real? Seems staged, to me…

    And sexism is funny, if it’s OBVIOUSLY a joke.

    Like, what’s the difference between a male and female lawyer? about $50,000 per year! Oh!

  22. Very true mcowles – mens’ brains are sold for more because they’re less used…

  23. STC wants the admins to allow racism?
    Go back to tha kitchen woman!

  24. You don’t read too good do you @ 23? Stick to your dueling banjos.

  25. @STC

    You’re making it way too easy to mock you. You are handing everyone the materials they need, and telling them how to put those materials together. I’m not doing it, but only because it’s too easy.

    I’d be more inclined to mention that you used the adjective “good” when you meant the adverb “well”. Which isn’t really funny, but it’s a start.

  26. oh man that’s awful

  27. Seriously. You guys are mocking people ON THE LAMEBOOK COMMENTS PAGE. Hilarious. It’s a regular MENSA meeting in here. You’re also arguing about the purity of these entries – AND YOU’RE ALL DEAD SERIOUS.

    Oh wait. I’m in here berating you. I lose, you lose, we all lose.

  28. HorseMode FTW.

  29. Dumped by text, what a wanker!

  30. Donnaven – his mother’s name is Donna and dad’s name is Calven or Keven or Malven or … you get the drift.

    And Dani knows she wasn’t good enough for him, talk about a pity party.

  31. @Horsemode

    You have a point. But you have to admit there is a touch of the lame about complaining about people complaining about people complaining about people posting on Facebook.

  32. antoinette jeanine

    Back in high school, all three of my boyfriends (subsequent, not concurrent) dumped me by email. The last one would have really stung- we dated for nine months and were fairly serious- if only he hadn’t penned the sentence “I think you should just except it and move on.”

    The digital age has a way of alerting you to the caliber of moron you’re dating in a way that phone conversations never could. I excepted it, and I’m glad I did.

  33. People who break up through text messages are total cowards. Are they THAT afraid of announcing a breakup face-to-face, or over the phone for that matter?

  34. @33 Seriously. It’s not like the woman is going to get a gun and pop you. They’re lucky I’ll accept just a little kiss and not make them give me head like them bitches should.
    But I can’t stand when girls cry. Then they never leave and go away, they need 20 answers as to why you would do such a thing.

  35. Awkwarrrrrd…

  36. FAKE

  37. @antoinette jeanine

    Oh dear. It sounds like us men have treated you rather poorly. Do you want to talk about it love? I’m not normally sympathetic but I can make an acception for you.

  38. And for those doubting Thomases out there please stop crying fake or whatever. You will find this site much more enjoyable if you accept that all the sumbmissions are genuine and thus allowing us all to rip the fuck out of the participants. I usually dislike the saying ‘ignorance is bliss’ but I’m making an exception in this case.

  39. @mactrick–Definitely not fake, I sent this in, I know who they are.
    @Sam–They just graduated hs, so they’re kinda “kids”? Depends on your definition.

  40. HTF did they graduate from high school? They can’t even write in English.

  41. @ Antionette Jean
    If he spells like that, you totally didn’t lose :)
    Man this convo cracks me up… I’d feel sorry for her with it all being so public… if she just didn’t carry on the conversation herself.

  42. @STC, really? are you so dumb for real? have you heard about sarcasm? Its the internets woman, sigh… I don`t know why even bother trying to explain…

  43. I would of loved this post if it ended after “no y” or maybe the comment before that.

  44. Fucking niggers. They’re like a different species.

  45. @ Wow
    If they had a choice, they’d probably prefer not to be thought of as the same species as shitbags like you.

  46. how can you expect the guy to be able to communicate effectively, wen his parents spelled his name like that? give a moron a break.

  47. Wow what a gentleman! His first ‘break up’ and he has the sensitivity to do it via text and FB :p

  48. Don’s a good guy. He didn’t lie to her.

  49. Sigh. So many losers on facebook/

  50. When I read my feed I enjoy pointing out the dumb comments, than I get to come here and see a collection of everyones dumb asses

  51. HorseMode wins.

  52. this shit is serious guys don’t laugh

  53. I was feeling sorry for Dani right up until she said “Wow! I knew I wasn’t good enough for you.” (Translated for your convenience and my sanity)

    Any girl THAT pathetic would turn me off too.. Seriously, she just got dumped rather viciously, and she immediately blames herself? Does she “self-harm” too? I bet her profile photo is taken from above and to the side and she has white makeup on and a forlorn almost suicidal look in her emo eyes… if you could see them behind the hair, that is.

    Cut, cut, bleed, bleed… loser.

  54. so in other words that girl was a big fat ass with a great personality and this was the easy way of letting her down.. that sucks for her

  55. What bothers me is not so much that the next generation after me is filled with idiots who can’t spell. That was always the case since the invention of language.

    What’s troublesome is that in this generation, the *smart* kids who know how to write, still choose to write like idiots. That’s a new phenomenon.

  56. Lest we be indentified as *smart* and suffer all the associated negative repercussions.

    Yesterday I had to explain to one of my friends, who is currently scoring higher than I am on our economics degree, the meaning of the word ‘inflammatory’. That was a little depressing.

  57. What a jackass! Long distance relationships work! As long as 1) You aren’t a pig and have to have sex 24-7. And 2) You love the girl.

  58. kcbaby, shut the fuck up. Unless you’ve been in a long distance relationship, you don’t know what you’re talking about. It’s hard as hell to stay together, and self-righteous romanticizing fuckwits like you don’t make things any easier.

  59. I’m just going to mention that I have been in a long-distance relationship. They do work (going on four years). Yes, I agree that it’s hard, but it’s definitely not impossible.

  60. That’s true.. long distance relationships do work. So long as you don’t mind that one of you is cheating. (Or you’re 13 yrs old..) If you’re the one being faithful.. sorry to have the news broke to you via some stranger on the internet. >.<

  61. Just for you long-distance people:

    I HAVE been in a long distance relationship. I’m now married to that man, and as hard as it was, we stuck through it together, and loved each other all the more for it (and no, neither of us cheated on the other). I agree totally with sbs_kcbaby – if you’re not in it for the sex, and you truly do love each other, it’ll work. To anyone else with a high-and-mighty opinion of what a relationship should be like, and that long-distance can’t work, I feel sorry for you, cause you obviously have your priorities wrong, and not in it for the love – or having found the right person TO love yet. But don’t judge those who have made it work. :)

    Having said all that… to dump someone on txt then announce it to the world on facebook, man… it’s just wrong.. so so wrong…

  62. I am also married to a guy I was in a long distance relationship with for three years. Some of us can actually manage not to fuck other people in between visits.

  63. This entry is fuckin HILARIOUS. What a pair.

  64. The immaturity is just sickening.

  65. your face is just sickening

  66. This isn’t that bad, other than the lack of spelling. if he was a real man he would have done it on the phone or something. and i got my hopes up with the name Donavon.

    Landon Donavon is my hero.

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