Thursday, January 5, 2012

Doggon’ It!

previous post: A Bumpy Road



  1. I am genuinely surprised someone making a joke about Obama’s low chance of being re-elected got posted on this site. For the longest time it seemed like such a liberal place to be.

  2. Looking at that Republican field, Obama would have to molest a child no to be re-elected.

  3. Hopefully, that $45 was spent on the good stuff, like a small bottle of Grand Marnier.

    Those dogs need to learn how to spell.

  4. 1. what’s holistic. 2. why the hell did Jordan say in his second comment

  5. leeeeeroyjenkins

    Glad to know this was stolen from Reddit. Like half of everything on Lamebook nowadays.

  6. @BlargBurger:

    Holistic = natural.

    And I *think* what Jordan was trying to say in his second comment was “Well, I hope you never get sick — or you’re rich — because other than that, you might as well kiss your ass goodbye.” Amazing what a bit of spelling and punctuation can do for a person.

  7. Remember all those posts asking for donations because FaceyB was suing Lamebook? I know why, it’s cos Mark Zuckerberg (AHAHAHAHAHAHA type “zuckerberg” into a comment on here, then right-click it for spelling suggestions, it gives you “cocksucker” as an option, amazing) saw the downfall and wanted to be one step ahead – it’s all the shit comments where people try to explain stuff to the rest of the crowd/make jokes that aren’t funny/actlikegeneralcumrecepticalswhilstsuckingdickandafterwardsusingpubestoflossbecausethatistheirlifescallinganddontknowanythingelse…cunts. Be funny or STFU before all the actually funny people, like Beatus, Ms, Hawkbit and Mario… etc? leave.

  8. the reason all the rich fucks take holistic medicine is probably because they’re the only ones who can afford it. Same reason why all the rich fucks take Scientology.

  9. Thanks, Crusty! You’re pretty funny, too.

  10. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    Anybody up for a Holistic vs Regular Medicine arguement?

  11. Sure, Dukey. Holistic medicine sucks. The best way to lose 20 pounds of ugly fat real fast isn’t through holistic crap. You simply have to cut off your head.

  12. ***Inflammatory post calling holistic medicine bullshit. Also I added a link to something that may or may not back up my post***

  13. Codename Dutchess

    Ask Steve Jobs how well holistic medicine works. (fuck anyone who thinks it’s “too soon”)

  14. When idiot number 1 says ‘holistic’ does it mean ‘homeopathic’ medicine? Cos where I’m from, if you say ‘holistic’ it just means all-round healthcare, like, you still get drugs and operations and whathaveyou, but they hold your hand and give you counselling and wash your cock for you and all that too. You know? It’s actually a good thing…

    Whereas homeopathic medicine is as effective as praying to the Orca-God to cure you of dysentery…

    Hey! If you spell check the word ‘dysentery’, it comes up ‘Zuckerburg’, check it out!

    Nah, it’s just a joke.

  15. On the old Oregon Trail, you die of dysentery.

    In Soviet Russia, you die of Zuckerburg.


  16. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    Homeopathy brought us such awesome drugs like Zicam. You know, the one used to treat cold and allergies but as a minor side effect, you just have to give up your fucking sense of smell.

    Homeopathy is an off shoot of Holistic Medicine. There are other branches covering other things like naturopathy, some psychology, acupuncture etc.

  17. Actual dogs would have shut the hell up far sooner

  18. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    … and used more punctuation.

  19. The internet is an unfair medium for discussing homoeopathy because those reading your comments can’t see you waving your hands in the air and going ‘woooooooo…’ as you consider what utter bollocks it all is.

    Also, I hate dogs like the ones in those profile pictures. Stupid, yet brutal, creatures.

  20. drchalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

    There is one medical condition that homeopathy can cure, but only in absolutely massive doses.

    Mild dehydration.

  21. drchalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

    For those who don’t know what homeopathy is (and there seem to be some of those people here); it’s not the same as herbal medicine or anything like that.

    Homeopathy is based on two (flawed) principles.
    1. That things that cause symptoms also treat them.
    2. That water has memory and takes on the chemical composition of compounds it is exposed to.

    Let those sink in for a second.

    Homeopathy consists of minute quantities of active ingredients diluted in massive quantities of water. The formula they use is something called C30. That’s one part active ingredients to 10 to the power of 30 parts water; thats a 1 followed by 30 zeros.

    To put it another way, to get a single molecule of active ingredient from a homeopathic remedy you would have to imbibe more water than there is on the plant. In fact, more water molecules than there are atoms in our solar system.

    That, my friends, is homeopathy. It’s bullshit. There’s just no way around it; it’s definitely bullshit.

  22. drchalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

    Also, Zicam has nothing to do with homeopathy.

  23. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    If you happen to be a consumer that has the equipment to test and detect their ingredients in your garage,then yes it is not homeopathy.
    If on the other hand you are the average consumer (or even fucking Doctor)that believed the hype in their marketing, then it is homeopathy.

    Here is my own link that may or may not back up my post:

  24. ^^^ Fuck me!!! If you’re ill, go to the fucking doctors, don’t spout your 2 penny bullshit here. Time and fucking place people you gross, neglected window lickers!!! Truth is, whatever form of meds you decide to use, the clap is a fucker, and you need to get rid of it. Today, you can call me “Doctor Lurrrrrrv – making Lovelips lovely since 1988″

  25. @21: “Homeopathy is based on two (flawed) principles.
    1. That things that cause symptoms also treat them.”

    Isn’t that also western medicine’s principle of vaccination?
    I know a holistic doctor who does amazing things–she also believes that in many cases, antibiotics and surgery are absolutely necessary. There’s a middle ground here. For every holistic witch doctor there’s a GP who gives out antibiotics like candy on Halloween.

  26. Dakpainter, I was going to point that out also, but I maintain my statement, neglected window lickers.

  27. ^Holy Shit! I was seeking reason on a Lamebook comments thread.
    I sincerely apologize. I’ve been on deadline and spending way too much time alone in the studio!

  28. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. In other words, a shot of Tequila daily keeps the bugs away so that you don’t get sick and have to chug the entire bottle.

    If you do get to that point though, remember, what doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger.

  29. ‘I know a holistic doctor who does amazing things’

    Yeah, making money from a load of old bollocks is pretty jaw-dropping imo also

  30. Tequila makes me poorly. So very poorly. I appreciate the thoughtfulness though.

  31. Deep breath: homeopathy DOES work. Especially on the gullible: the placebo effect of imbibing magic water is then even stronger. Of course, this does mean that to use it on infants or animals is at best deluded and at worst criminally negligent.


  33. The thing is, much of what is marketed as ‘homeopathic’ is not, in fact, homeopathic in the strict sense. Homeopathy is based on the two principles described by drchalk. However, a lot of so-called ‘homeopathic’ stuff is really just herbal.

    Vaccination does not work on the principle that what causes symptoms can cure them as homeopathy does. It works on the principle that the body’s antibody production can be stimulated by the introduction of certain substances. Often, the substance is NOT the same as the cause of the disease in question, but something which, while relatively harmless, will trigger antibody production.

  34. Hey Gonzo, just because the herbs you ordered at 3 am didn’t make your penis larger or even visible, doesn’t mean there’s not homeopathic doctors curing peanut allergies and rheumatoid arthritis.
    I keep forgetting; everyone’s a fucking genius on the Internet.

  35. Good lord–now I’m in a throw down with a man named after a muppet. Time to cap the turpentine and get some fresh air.

  36. ^ True dat, true dat

  37. And here I was thinking he was named after a style of porn…

  38. the important thing to remember here is some guy posts something, two morons get into an arguement, and the guy who made the post blows them out of the water by using some dog fighting comment i dont really get and then using hte phrase “Just sayin”. “just sayin’” means you have no confidence in what you just wrote, along the lines of “not for nothing” or “no offense”. You said nothing of brilliance and are about as creative and non-conformative as “DJ Dave” in the hyundai commercials. that said, i will await comments that i am a moron and say nothing of brilliance.

  39. I. The final comment was not by the person who created the post.
    IIa. The dog fighting comment is in reference to the two morons’ profile pictures. There is no deeper meaning intended. (Unless you want to associate the word dog with its meaning of “ugly girl” – however I feel that Jordan and Scott here are both men and that was not the intention)
    IIb. He says “just sayin’” because he has no agenda or argument other than to point out this one fact. He is literally, just saying that “it looks like two dogs are arguing on facebook” (although he is typing, this has become an accepted meaning of the verb ‘to say’)

    QED. Horton hears a who no more. Scooby Doo unmasks the monster.

    Elementary my dear Watson. Mystery solved. Eureka.

    A touch of midsummer murders, CSI cold cases and SpooksI5.

  40. SirButLust, the most important thing to remember here is that Canada is America’s hat.

  41. I prefer to think of Canada as bird shit on top of America’s head. Y’know, ‘cos Canada is white what with all the snow. Plus, I imagine bird shit would say “ay” quite a lot.

  42. I’m converted! Homeopathy definitely works! I drank some magic homeopathic water and it made my cum taste like raspberries

  43. Mine tastes like man fat.

  44. Why are you two tasting your own man yogurt?

  45. Darkpainter said my penis was invisible so I was trying to cover my tracks by suggesting that I masturbate and eat the proceeds.

    In reality, I have no idea what any of these words mean. Tragic really.

    And I’m not named after a Muppet, FFS..!

  46. So then I was right. You WERE named after your favorite style of porn. Nice!

  47. @39 you are right,for some reason i thought the “just sayin” guy was the original poster. and good news after a bunch of beers i get it, the two posters arguing have pics of their dogs for profile pics so its “two dogs fighting”. hilarious.i guess i expect too much out of lamebook.

  48. oh god, and i just realized #39 said it was the profile pics i didnt even notice that. i should just drink all through life, maybe id be more observant.

  49. sirbutlust, I recommend that you try colloidal silver or snake juice to assist with your observation, focus, memory retention and if applied topically, to make you glitter like Cullen in the sun.

  50. sirbutlust, it’s people like you that make it worthwhile coming here. My thanks.

  51. Yep, the states is far superior to Canada. The way an overgrown, slow-witted, half-retarded bully is superior to the intellectually advanced “nerd” he picks on. Sorry, I’m speaking to Americans, I should end my sentence with a long, drawn-out “uuuh?” so you’ll understand me, EH? Ooops sorry, “ay”?? <<wtf, lol

  52. Thanks Peter! I could not noticed the dogs in the profile pics so I did not get the last comment until your post!!
    And Gonzo, you should actually be flattered that Mr Painter realized you were named after a muppet with such a big….hum… nose. Far from being invisible if we believe in those tales that say their size are proportionate. Maybe this compliment will help sugar-coat what I am going to tell you next: you’re being plain ignorant when it comes to the benefits of homeopathic medecine. Read up.

  53. I take all my medecine with a side of E.

  54. Lol two dogs fighting

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