Doctors try to grab your junk at every opportunity whether you have erectile dysfunction or not. Women think men don’t like to go to the doctor because they think they’re too manly or because they’re afraid. Really, though, men don’t like going to the doctor because every time we go some dude (or chick) with cold hands grabs our junk and sticks a finger up our ass and doesn’t even buy us dinner first.
That being said, James embarrassing himself like that when he could have reported the whole experience as a Penthouse Forum-worthy event is simply unforgivable.
Mike and Casey are the sort of guys you see in one of those crap American Pie sequels/ripoffs, that are way more obsessed with boobs and porn than any real person possibly could be, and that you’d hate to hang out with.
Three lamebook fans die and go to heaven where they’re met by St. Peter. He tells them they’ve each been good boys, but before he can let them in, they must each tell him the meaning of easter.
First lamebook fan says, “That’s easy. Easter is when mom cooks a turkey and we sit around and watch football games all day long. Poor Peter just shakes his head, tells him he’s confused ester with thanksgiving, and asks the same question of the 2d fan.
Then 2d fan, equally confident, responds, “That’s easy. Easter is when mom cooks a turkey, we exchange presents, and then watch football games all day long.” Again, Peter is distraught and tells him he’s confused easter with christmas.
Asking the 3d fan, he gets this response: “In the beginning, god created the heavens and the earth and all the people on it; but the people were so bad, he had to send his only son to suffer and die and redeem their sins. Encouraged, Peter asks him to continue. The 3d goes on, “and he did. He suffered and he died and was buried in a cave. Three days later, he came out, saw his shadow, and we had six more weeks of winter.”
It’s kinda fun to tell this joke to fundamentalists who’ll often laugh before realizing the nature of their sacrilege.