Friday, June 4, 2010

Current Currents

previous post: Unintelligent Updates

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137 Comments

  1. word!

  2. The second one is in very poor taste. Not cool, lamebook.

  3. .. oh and r.i.p. Rue.

  4. I have to agree but was excited to be here first for some bizarre reason. Drinking gin this Friday instead of beer…might be it.

  5. I’m not finding anything humorous about the second one.

  6. Gin will do that. Love those Golden Girls. They were like the post menopausal/geriatric “Sex and the City” back in the day.

  7. Yeah, the 2nd one is just wrong, plain wrong!

  8. Because there’s nothing humorous there, Zoned.

  9. the second one is really bad taste (no pun intended)…

  10. If Carrie and her cronies keep making those pathetic sequels, I’m seeing a “Golden Girl” type situation in their very near future. It will never be as good, though.

  11. Yes, I have watched my share of Golden Girls but when I come across an episode now I can’t watch it. Same with M*A*S*H. … and Happy Days. They seem so freakin’ sappy ..

    Tanqueray my friends..!

  12. Lol it’s funny cos he locked up his daughter and raped her and she had his kids and he burnt one and when they got out one fell into a coma and they all need extensive therapy to get over the absolutely fucking disgusting things that happened to them down there.

    LOL!

  13. Come on, Lamebook. You’re not Sickipedia, for christ’s sake.

  14. Well, I’m going to go cook a pork chop, boil some potatoes, finish my cigar and drink. This is not Sickipedia for christ’s sake.

  15. Jeez, stop being babies. These were all fucking hilarious.

  16. Harsh, mass. Some of the eps were good, and quite sexual.

    And come to think of it, the Samantha character from SATC is at about the age that the GG’s were.

    Hobes, I know, this post is a new low.

  17. Does Adam normally talk during movies? It’s because of people like him that I see fewer and fewer movies in the theater and buy more and more DVDs.

  18. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    The comments are now officially the only reason I show up on lamebook, thanks word, Hobo, Mc, slim ee katy etc and of course Malt. Oh yeah and bulldog too for his increasingly creepy comments.

    and I’m having gin too, I might switch to vodka later

  19. @BritishHobo

    Whoa… I thought Josef Fritzl was that pretzel guy. Hmmm, Oh well.

    Maybe he was mad that his name doesn’t have very many vowels?

  20. @BritishHobo

    Whoa… I thought he was that pretzel guy. Hmmm, Oh well.

    Maybe he was mad that his name doesn’t have very many vowels?

  21. Whoa, apparently this guy’s name tips off the mod3r@tors. Eventually there will be two more posts exactly like this one, haha.

  22. Explain to me why the Fritzl thing is a “current current.” Wasn’t he arrested like 2 years ago for this?

  23. Didn’t get the first till I read the comments..

    erm yeah nice one lamebook… you’re just a bit shitty at finding funny stuff really aren’t you?!

    and the 3rd was arse, wow period and sex and the city jokes… funny

  24. @numnum

    “wow period”? Is that why they are called “blood elves”? Get it? Where are my World of Warcraft buds at? Holla!

  25. @mcowles

    haha I totally didn’t get that for ages, 3rd time round I laughed lol… beginning to think I’m pretty slow actually

  26. cellar party…awesomely classy.

  27. poor Adam. i feel for him.

  28. I don’t, how possessive must he be to go along on what’s clearly a girls night… bet his girlfriend hates him but won’t dump him in case he goes psycho and kills her family

  29. @26 I rather think it’s not about how possessive HE is, but about how possessive, controlling and psycho his girl friend is.
    Otherwise, why would he be complaining about it?

  30. so he doesn’t look gay

  31. Thanks for the mention Smoothy Buns… I adore your name… makes me smile :)

    The first one was okay, at best. You’ve got to get a small chuckle about poop in ones pants… either due to age or a shart…

    The second… terrible. That’s all I’m saying.

    The last one sounds like one of my guy friend’s typical whiney updates about their girlfriend that they adore but constantly complain about so they don’t get called whipped. Not entertaining.

    Soooooo…. whose drinkin’ tonight?!?! T-minus 2 minutes I am out of this office and downing some vodka… who’s with me? :)

  32. I don’t understand why girls like taking guys to chick flicks anyway.

    I personally don’t get as much enjoyment out of something if I have to drag someone along, boyfriend or not. I’ll see my chick flicks and go shopping by myself, kthanks.

  33. tango alpha delta oscar

    2nd pic = damn… it’s just like that “we hate jesus” fan page shit.

  34. katypants… the wine is in hand!

  35. Betty White has a great dusty muffin i hope she lives long enough to resemble a lizard!

  36. Im drinking Jack Daniels and red bull betty white is looking better and better! i wonder if she likes younger guys…..well she probably has no choice.

  37. I’m sure Betty White is not lacking for bed warmers. She’s cool as shit, I’d do her! Fuck her age!

  38. OK its sick to repost the Fritzl thing or even submit it to Lamebook, or worse, to create it! Submitter… why didn’t you just click ‘report’? wtf.

  39. That was quite an arousing comment you made there, ee.

  40. ee, I totally agree, and I love Betty as well.

    I hope there’s at least one more post over the next few days, so that sick fuck’s face isn’t the first thing I see when loading lamebook.

  41. After I read that incredibly disturbing (and totally unfunny) second post I thought about those poor victims and I gotta say, compared to that, Adam is just a sad little whiner. Not much compares really. So sad :(

  42. jordanjackthomas

    WOW. Not even slightly amusing…

    FAIL.

  43. I don’t know how anyone can like Sex and the City.

    “Oh, but it’s not just about the clothes and shoes. It’s about the women”

    Yes, vacuous, narcissistic, superficial, frivolous women. Maybe if it was just about the clothes and shoes it would be okay.

  44. oh c’mon everyone loves sex in the city!!!!!! it was on cable! cable doesnt have commercials…..the commercials were the drivel coming out of their mouths and the clothes they wore…. plus sarah jessica parkers face looks like a foot ….she needs all the designer fashion she can get.
    the redhead with yellow teeth looks like the dude from kids in the hall and newsradio…..even with snazzy clothes.

  45. @opionbreath

    haha, I never thought about her looking like Dave Foley, but your spot on!

  46. Oh and Xepher, you’re totally going to have an erotic dream tonight with Betty White as the star! You can thank me in the morning when your singing the ‘Golden Girls’ theme in your head after such wonderful bliss. ;)

  47. Ahhhh thank you opinionbreath! I was totally bored with the comments until your amazingly awesome post! SJP foot comparison! Dave Foley’s little known role on SATC! Good job, sir!

  48. Post #1: I love Betty, but that was pretty funny.

    Post #2: That is just fucking retarded. Sex up your offspring while they’re still infants and the internal bleeding will guarantee that you never have to build a dungeon. Why do people find it so hard to combine horrific incest with good sense?

    Post #3: College chicks. Numerous college chicks. Movie about sexually aggressive women. Booze. Score.
    Adam is a short sighted fag.

  49. Post #1: I love Betty, but that was pretty funny.

    Post #2: That is just fucking retarded. Sex up your offspring while they’re still infants and the internal bleeding will guarantee that you never have to build a dungeon. Why do people find it so hard to combine horrific incest with good sense?

    Post #3: College chicks. Numerous college chicks. Movie about sexually aggressive women. Booze. Score.
    Adam is a short sighted (British cigarette) – moderated.

  50. Oh Soup, you never cease to amaze me with your lack of decency. (in regards to post 2)But you wouldn’t be you if you didn’t have something loathing (or sexist or discriminating) to say. I’m still mildly attracted to you however, what a wonder.

  51. Mildly attracted? I don’t know if I should be flattered by your acceptance, or horrified by your bad taste.

    Ok, a hypothetical for you eenerbl: If I still had baby innards on it, would you still put my cock in your mouth?

  52. Also, Soup that was typed with a smile. :) (See! Smile.) I’m off to sleep away my alcohol consumption of the evening.

  53. Either should I Soup! It’s a never ending battle. I’m forever at war over you.

    Maybe, I’ve never been in the presence of ‘baby innards’ before. So I really can’t answer that question.

  54. Eenerbl, I know you love me. It’s okay. The self-loathing will soon become second nature. Granted, my mom’s suicide note claimed I was the devil, but what do you expect from a woman who banged my son?

    Everyone is jumping on the bandwagon against BP, but I’ve been shunning petroleum products for ages. Plastic cock rings? No thanks. Infant intestines are the natural choice. They are erotically necrotic.

  55. Nothin’ like a bit of the ol’ in’out eh?

  56. I’m still at odds weather or not I love you. Those words are too strong for me, lust maybe? I think I just want to use you to state my desire. Now as far as you and your mom go, well that’s your own shit to work out. Good luck with that.

    Soup, don’t get me going on BP. My state is just now seeing the ramifications of that incident. It saddens me. If you choose to go ‘natural’ well, I guess more power to ya. Good luck with the cock rings.

  57. nuff!!!

  58. c’mon, that reference was brilliant in its own right, eh ee?

  59. It was! Very nice.

  60. Anthony Burgess had a way with words.

    I can’t even shock anyone anymore. I’m going to have to change my shtick.

  61. Gotta admit that I have been a bit lacking in my posting these days, need to pick up the slack a bit. Had to go back quite a few lamebook entries to see that clockwork orange reference. You’re response (#8) to that one gave me a good laugh.

  62. Soup, if you can top what goes on in your life already, you’re gonna have to start making shit up.

  63. You’re still good Soup. You get my panties in a twist, no worries.

    nuff, that is one of my favorite movies. I’m glad I got a chuckle out of you. Plus, I found it very appropriate!

  64. Ah, the usual suspects, hanging around late at night, good to see you all.

    And yes, nuff, I haven’t seen much of you lately, actually, not much of anyone for that matter. I’ve kind of given up on the occasional to and fros.

  65. word! It’s like a reunion of sorts. I have a feeling this means trouble will soon arise.

  66. When I bought my new (used) big screen from a buddy of mine, got over a hundred great VHS films and a VCR with it as well and i’ve been starting to watch a few of them. So many classics, and Clockwork Orange was the first one I watched. Got others like One Flew Over The Cuckoos Nest, Apocalypse Now, The Shawshank Redemption, etc. It’s nice seeing some artistically sound movies compared to some of the shit put out these days.

  67. I have to agree nuff, my VHS collection is as vast as my DVD one.

    Shawshank…that’s one hell of a movie!

    Enough about that, you still owe me a bottle of wine!

  68. word! My favourite aussie! Good morning to ya mate. (In a particularly good mood right now).

  69. Where has everyone been, ee? Behaving themselves, it seems. Boring bastards. It’s nice to finally chat with my long time female partner in crime.

  70. It’s the afternoon here, nuff, cold and wet (not me), and by the by, you have some great films there on your list. I’m impressed.

  71. I’ve been busy, (drinking, reading, fucking…what have you.) you’ve still been in the back of my mind however. I’ve been lacking inspiration it seems, nobody to play with. We operate at different times, very frustrating!

  72. … >.> ummm… About that bottle…. I’m letting it age properly… Yeah, so, you know, when you drink it, it will be the best wine you’ve ever had. I mean, seriously, I can’t just be sending you crappy wine after all we’ve been through ee!

  73. Lies nuff, such lies! Seriously though…where is my wine? You drank it didn’t you! Ass!

  74. Word, you’ll be glad to know I avoided putting any fishing hooks into my penis. My boat-mates were not so lucky.

    Eenerbl, if I can twist up a married woman’s panties, then I should have no problems at the schoolyard.

    Nuff, please forgive my trichinosis ridden brain, but I can’t remember, were you the hockey fan?

  75. ee, my inspiration’s dried up somewhat. I’m blaming it on the season, but I like the sound of the activities you’ve been partaking in. I haven’t been doing much of any of those lately. Lost the old mojo. I’m in a dry spell, except for the bloody weather.

  76. Soup, I am NOT married. Living in sin yes, married NO! Sorry, had that get that out there.

  77. Soup, do any of your mates require my nursing assistance to mend their S&M wounds? I’m more than happy to help.

  78. Such wild accusations ee! Me, drink the wine promised for you? I can’t believe you would think such a thing. For shame, for shame!

    And Soup, yes, I am the hockey fan. You should definitely look into getting those buggers out of your head #1 wingman.

  79. Oh word! You need some lovin’, dry spells are no good! You need gratification!

  80. Excellent ee, then there’s still hope for me yet. That is, if you’d like to come and visit on this side of the fence for a while.

  81. nuff, you should visit me, we can go to a Tampa Bay Lightning game. I’d get us box seats!

  82. Like you’d have to ask word! I thought that invite was thrown out months ago!

  83. You drank my wine nuff. There is no shame!

  84. word, for the past few minutes or so, i’ve been trying to accumulate some suggestions for fun things to do during the winter season, but alas, my brain has failed me considering I don’t know what you do for fun or what is available in Australia. Good luck though!

  85. Eenerbl, my sincere apologies. Although, that just means I won’t have to worry about any legal ramifications when I steal you away.

    Word, no, they’re good, I sucked out all the tetanus. They said that was what I needed to do. But why were they all already hard?

    Nuff, all tied up now for the Cup. I’m not liking it.

    Walter Sobchak, if you’re out there: I’d fuck you.

  86. Well ee, I respect the sanctity of wedlock, so much of that was lip service, but now I know you’re not actually married, I can say things with the belief that one day, we might just get there.

  87. Gotta admit that i’ve been rooting for Chicago since they beat Vancouver for the rest of the playoffs. Lots of good B.C. boys on that team and the Cup will come to a city near me since all the players bring it back to their hometowns. Phili can go fuck themselves.

    On another note, ee, next time Vancouver comes down to beat the Lightning, we can watch the game with each other, get mad at each other, and then have post-game make-up sex. In the box. I’ll have that bottle of wine when that time comes ;) It should be perfect by that time next season.

  88. Soup, you could try. What do you have to lure me?

    word, I so love your bluntness. You can shack up with me any time. No need fore requests.

  89. nuff, I may have to wait a while for that wine and apparently sex, but I guess it’s worth it. Damn you!

  90. nuff, pretty much everything that’s available to you guys, we have, minus the ice hockey, but add kangaroos to the main streets. It’s all good, it’s footy season.

  91. Soup, if you were coming at them with a lance, and your lips at the ready, how could they NOT be hard? It stands to reason.

  92. World Cup soccer is close! Should be exciting, and I don’t even watch soccer normally. It’s funny what happens when it’s international. You should definitely go snowboarding though word, a helluvah lot of fun. Or is there snow on the mountains yet?

    ee, it will be worth every second spent waiting.

  93. Eenerbl, that’s just not fair. Word says the word, and your snatch is snatchable. I have to provide a resume. You’ve seen my picture and you’ve seen my words. What else do I need to provide?

    Nuff, I’m a Chicagoan so I haven’t been liking these last couple of games. Although the bar tonight was quite a good time.

  94. Word, I know, I’m a sexy bitch. But I’m starting to think that my ass didn’t hold the antidote for their penis infections. But why would they lie?

  95. I expected Chicago to win in 5 after how those first two games went, but considering how the series has played out so far, home ice advantage has played a huge role. They’ve been high scoring games, but I believe Niemi is the better goaltender in this series, Chicago has been laying out the BIG hits more often. Campbell absolutely destroyed Leino (I think that was who it was) and even Hossa took out Pronger. I would love to see it go down to game 7 though to be honest.

  96. nuff, touché.

    Soup, well I have nothing to go against that. So, I guess the correct response is why are you not here? It’s only, what a 15 hour drive?

  97. No snow yet nuff, or at least I don’t think so. I’m not much for the snow, did it once, and never went back. I’ll usually try most things once. And I love the soccer, too. Australia plays Germany 1st round. Bugger, but will still be rooting for the win.

    Sorry Soup, but ee doesn’t need to see my pic to know it would be worth her while, although I would love to swap pics with her. I just know we’d make a hot duo.

  98. I’d rather the Hawks just close it out asap, but as a sports fan I could appreciate a game 7. But GODDAMN it would be stressful.

  99. Soup, I’d lie for that opportunity, even though I lack the said appendage.

  100. word, the links on the blog (at the bottom). I’ll send you a pic.

  101. Eenerbl, just show up? Amongst the kids and the boyfriend/lover/partner/mate? I’d feel guilty for taking you away, getting you drunk, and then returning you disappointed.

    Word, PICS! I think it’s your ladies turn to show the goods. Lets see some photos.

  102. You know Soup, you disappoint me! I clicked on your link, and I’m not included, I’m hurt. I’ll get over it though, with alcohol and foreign substances.

  103. Soup, you really need to quit spoiling my fun by pointing out the real world. Here, that’s not an objective.

  104. ee, if I was net savvy enough, I’d create a link that would have you in it for sure, but alas, my talents lay elsewhere.

  105. Must be tough on the knees right now ee. Hope it gets better soon! Anyway, i’m gonna kick it for now. Soup, word, ee, I bid you adieu.

  106. Oh, and the other thing done, ee.

  107. Eenerbl, you disappeared for a while and Word and I developed a connection. It is by no means a slight towards you. You know your boobs are the place my penis wants to rest.

    Once again, I have to apologize. To make up for it, I will be at your house in 2 hours, riding my unicorn. I will then take you down the rabbit hole where the Red Queen will make you do awful things to my head.

  108. word, one day. :)

    I too need to call it in. I have a fishing trip early in the A.M.

  109. Soup, I’m not one for fairy tales, and the red queen kinda freaks me out. Don’t fault me for my shortcomings, I try to be here when I can. Tears Soup, tears.

  110. Walter Sobchak

    Wtf was #83, a threat, an offer, a promise?

    You have any baby innards left Soup?

  111. Eenerbl, the tears make me hard. Why do you think I have a baby fetish?
    You don’t want the real world and you don’t want fairy tales. So it’s purely fantasy? I’ve got to be creative every time? Exhausting. But I’ll do it. Next time.

    Walter! I’m always willing to share some viscera with a friend.

  112. Night ee.

    Soup, I’m channelling Grace Slick right now thanks to you. I do love that song.

  113. By the way Soup, re your request, go to ee’s link. I’d be happy for her to oblige you.

  114. Word, I am drunk enough that I actually did make that request. We shall see what the future holds.

  115. wordpervert, I think lamebook put 2 up because it is wrong and lame.

    And why would Adam advertise how whipped he is.

  116. I dunno pinkhobo- usually lamebook puts a thumbs down above things it things are stupid or wrong.

  117. thinks*

  118. WTF I never realised this was under FTW

  119. notice how I started and finished with a 3 letter acronym.. yeah yeah did you? just as I thought… no one cares

  120. i felt the sentence had yet more palindromic potential numnum.

    and scrolling up, i’m really upset i missed the love-in earlier.

    i’ve always had a soft-spot for word. :-$

    oh, and i have to say this in spite of myself (forgive me) – but it’s FOOTBALL, not soccer. all of these kind of games (rugby, gridirion, aussie rules) originated from rugby football, but ””soccer”’, being the most widespread in the world, the older of the two, and the one played almost exclusively with the ‘foot’, surely deserves the term ‘football’.

    in countries where football is popular, it is always referred to as ‘football’, and never ‘soccer’. calling it ‘soccer’ is myopic!

  121. Thanks lamebook, I just downloaded new porn, but now I cant get a boner after reading this, totally FTW.

  122. Jesus Christ, Lamebook.

    Attila, you’re awesome.

  123. The second one is horrible. It’s not funny in the least. FAIL!!

  124. Adam stand up and be a man!

    My girl couldn’t pay me to watch the sex and the city movie with her, and ESPECIALLY not with 20 PMS-ing chicks! I’d rather shove toothpicks under my fingernails then watch that crap.

    Man, all i could hear while i was reading that was the sound of you being whipped

  125. 1. who talks at the cinema? is he so backwards that he doesn’t know if he’ll be all to keep up with all the shoe buying in the film?
    2. ‘oh my gf is such a bitch..i so don’t wanna go…’ quit whining about it and don’t go..she probs just invited you to be polite and you’re going to look like a major arsehole turning up there.
    3. to all those ‘whipped’ commentators…grow the fuck up or youre gonna have to learn how to blow your own cocks.
    4. to clarify; I’ve never watched a single episode of SATC in my life.

  126. now you just look like the one “whining”…

  127. krasivaya_devushka

    He must be his girlfriend’s bitch if she *makes* him watch chick flicks.

    And I don’t even want to read the second one; that is just horrible.

  128. Why the fuck was the 2nd one posted? JFC, this site is pathetic, now.

  129. excuse me… we don’t call it “period” anymore. It’s “riding the cotton pony”… or “shark week”

  130. joking about Elizabeth Fritzl: not cool. not cool at all.

    girls syncing periods?!! is anyone seriously dumb enough to believe that?? its a hormonal thing, and your hormones are NOT regulated by your proximity to other women. God damn.

    And Sex and City? I’m a girl and would NEVER watch that crap,, and even if i did i would never expect my boyfriend to- not because he’s a boy but because its not his thing. we watch the movies we both like together, and the movies only one of us likes seperately.

  131. Gaybriel, thanks for that, I didn’t even notice that thumb up or down thing. Maybe lamebook are being extra sarcastic?

    lol @Numnum

  132. Well, well, the GoldenGirls one is rather funny because Betty White has a macabre kind of humour as well, but I can’t stand the second one.

    Maybe it’s because the place where he lived is only half an hour’s drive away from my home (I’m Austrian).

  133. Nothing funny about Fritzl. Never was, never will be.

  134. @Zitrone

    I bet you could buy his house pretty cheaply. Might be a good investment. I won’t make a “fully finished basement” joke, though.

  135. HAHAHA the first one is Golden… One of the best wins I’ve seen on LB in a while

  136. @mcowles

    A lot of people wanted to buy that house after the whole thing -strange and somehow disgusting O_o

  137. That Fritzl one is effing HILARIOUS! You’re all so boring.

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