Saturday, May 1, 2010

Chainsawdomy

previous post: Weekend Wins

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143 Comments

  1. What an ass.

  2. Agree!

  3. Yeah. Umm…Chainsaw-phobe?

  4. Toadette is the winner

    wow.

  5. James would be win if he wasn’t a dumbass homophobe.
    Instead? He’s just a dumbass homophobe :(

  6. Desolation Row

    God , What an ass ! Poor poor Daniel :(

  7. James must have had a REAL bad experience with a chainsaw when he was a kid.

  8. terribletimes

    Of all the things someone could be phobic of…I think the LAST thing i would ever think of would be, ‘a chainsawphobe’ And I mean, ever.

  9. @nuff and homosexuals.. possibly at the same time.

  10. @2HB How could I have missed that part!?! I know, the gay guy must have tried raping him with a chainsaw and this experience has scarred him for the rest of his life. He’s just worried that his sons two gay friends happen to be chainsaw-wielding psychopaths out to ravage his boy.

  11. Ah, James, a homophobe is EXACTLY what you are.

  12. What I’m hoping is that James’ comment meant to say something like ‘I’m not a homophobe, however I AM a chainsaw-phobe, and don’t want one of them around my kids.’ but it came out badly worded.

  13. @BritishHobo, unfortunately he clearly states he doesn’t want either around his kids. It’s quite unfortunate really..

    @nuff yeah but aren’t all americans chainsaw-wielding psychopaths? lololol jokes of course, my flatmate from new york prefers to parade around with a machete.

  14. He used the word ‘either.’ He said what he said, and he meant it. He’s terrified of chainsaw-wielding gay dudes.

  15. Also, to myself, way to say unfortunate twice. I will never pass this journalism degree with such hideous repetition :’(

  16. Okay, he’s afraid of his son consorting with homosexuals. Fair enough, I suppose. I’m still baffled by his association of the dangers (as perceived by the father) of homosexuals with a potentially lethal tool…

    Oh, wait. Now I get it.

  17. 2HB, is your friend named Jason by any chance?

  18. I just remembered the time my father and I went camping near the river. All was fine and good until these two hill people showed up.
    They started massacring the trees, brutally just tearing at them. I thought nothing of it at the time, but I now recall the instrument they used to destroy those trees. It was Freddie Mercury.

  19. Fuck I hate homophobes, I’m dating one right now, and my sister is gay, so this definitely does not bode well for any future.

    He lives in the gayest part of town as well (yeah, the irony), and I never hear the bloody end of it. I think this is part of the reason my weekend is not going well.

    I told my buddy Soup a while back that I usually see blokes about 4 months before things start to sour, and it’s almost always them that fuck it up all on their own.

    So Soup, if you’re out there somewhere darlin’, can I tell you, funky jizz tastes better than the taste I’ve got in my mouth right now re this gay hating fella.
    The 4 months is almost up.

    And James, I hope your nuts drop off

  20. yo @nuff, he isn’t I’m afraid, he’s called Scott and my word is he annoying. If I have to hear Grizzly Bear’s Two Weeks one more time, I will send in a grizzly to chase him around his room for two weeks.
    (side note, I do have love for GB, he just plays that song all damn day. And drums on his desk along to it and I can hear it two doors down!)

    /rant

  21. I’m afraid of grizzly bears.

  22. …but if a chainsaw knocked at the door, I’d probably invite him in.

  23. Sorry to hear that word :(

    @Your last comment: seconded.

  24. Ok, this is just wierd… Popped up an old LB entry and I really get the feeling that James here is related to Joe, especially with what could potentially be the exact same last name since they both read Mc*****.
    http://www.lamebook.com/daddys-girl

  25. Thanks Hobes, right at this moment, I’m stting here typing, and he’s at the window berating every fella that’s walking by. I’m so angry right now, that I can’t push the point home hard enough, he’s great in other ways, but this thing, sheesh.

    And as for pushing the point home hard, that ain’t gonna happen for him today that’s for sure.

  26. wow, that’s really fascinating wordpervert. thanks for sharing.

    are you aware that this is not your diary?

  27. Hey, guess what, it’s a community. You can get to know people this way as well. That last bit made me laugh though.

  28. I love how he relates being around homosexuals to being around chainsaws, as if that somehow justifies his homophobia.

    Oh wait, no, I hate it. My bad.

  29. Ah I’m just joshin. Realised it was a bit mean after I posted it actually. Still though, a tad too much info.

  30. Well, if I had a son, I certainly wouldn’t want him hanging around a bunch of fruitcakes who would probably be trying to suck him off the whole time.

  31. @word, what part of Sydney isn’t the gay part of town? (Just a bit of Melbourne humour there)

    @fealkj, wtf? Just because they like guys doesn’t mean they want to suck off every guy they see. Otherwise you would get the same thing from straight girls.

  32. @word, as for that ‘man’ of yours, I think his time is up.

  33. Well, my last post is awaiting moderation, but if it goes through – Joe = James :P

    @31: You’re ridiculous. Comparing straight chicks to gay dudes? Don’t be a fucking clown.

  34. @fealkj Go kick rocks, drink bleach and walk it out on glass, eh.

  35. Daniel should delete James off his facebook and have sex with me to piss him off :)

  36. fealkj (is a) TROLL. IN THE COMMENTS SECTION. TROLL!

    …thought you ought to know.
    *faints dramatically*

  37. @2HB A troll! HOLY CRAP! Wait, let me pull out my troll survival guide… *reads* Hey there buddy, how about we go grab a beer and have a few laughs over this great site you recommended? I’m sure it will be loads of fun considering it’s super funny.

  38. @39: My Dad doesn’t like me hanging out with fruitcakes. Sorry.

    Anyway, glad you liked the site. I haven’t checked it out yet, but my pal Alen is always talking about it.

  39. Alen = James McBlur.

  40. @fealkj Alen is Frodo, and if you know anything about Frodo, you know how fruity he is.

  41. bollywood_rocks83

    word,if you’re being serious, me thinks it’s time to let the dude walk.
    fealkj, if you’re serious, you can go burn in hell, you idiot! People often forget that homosexuals are also people with feelings and want the same things we heteros want. I’m tired of people like you and Mr. homophobe up there and FYI, just because a guy is gay doesn’t mean they want to have sex with every guy they see.

  42. @ fealkj: wanna hang out with my chainsaw someday?

  43. I got to admit that at least James is crafty.

  44. James is insecure and sexually aroused by gay boys his son is friends with. S’why he is so uncomfortable with it.

  45. MonkeyCMonkeyDo

    i believe fealkj is joking

  46. I believe fealkj can’t tell 38 from 39

  47. MonkeyCMonkeyDo

    heheheh @emkitteh I just want to give them the benefit of doubt!

    I’m sorry about your situation word.. i hope it gets better!

  48. @EmKitteh: Eh? Everything looks fine to me. I guess since I have a comment that’s yet to be moderated, it throws my post #’s off by one.

    I wasn’t sure if that’s how it worked when I wrote “@39″, but now I know :)

  49. Imagine the torment Daniel would be under if he’s gay. That’s one big scary mofo of a house to come out of closet into.

  50. Word ditch the dick and come sit on mine ;)

  51. Who's That Girl?

    1. I want to castrate James. I laugh at a lot of messed up shyt, but this ain’t even right. What a dick. I hope his wife leaves him for another chick.

    2. Word, honey, drop that mofo. If this guys got you seeing red after only 4 months, time to show him the door!

  52. I hate homophobes. They’re so confusing. Like, my boyfriend said he needed a flair for the bare. I assumed he wanted to make some sort of costume for his cock. It wasn’t until the grizzly mauled him that I realized he wanted a flare for the bear.

  53. Yeah, I’m not scared of chainsaws either….until they start touching my kids. Then shits gonna go down. And chainsaws make a habit of touching my kids, so I’m applying for a restraining order on all chainsaws. Seriously, they better watch the fuck out. Now I’m not discriminating, I’m just being realistic. Chainsaws are much more likely to touch my kids than knifes or guns are.

    Clearly James is getting it on with Daniel and is jealous that he’s hanging out with other men. Other men who like other men. OH NOES!! COMPETITION!!!

  54. @Word

    Is it only the gay dudes he has an issue with? What about the gay chicks? Because if it’s just the guys, then you can tack on hypocrite to the list of flaws. But an understandable flaw. Because lesbians are cool.

  55. Who's That Girl?

    Lesbians ARE cool. That reminds me, I think it’s about time to turn on the porn…

  56. Soup, he don’t like gay chicks either, when he refers to my sis he calls her the poof. And don’t get me started on the other people/races he has problems with. He’s obviously been hiding behind a mask for a bit, but it has certainly slipped the last couple of weeks, he’s revealing the real him… they all do eventually.

    He bought me a piece of jewellery today, so that erases all the sins, I THINK NOT.
    Me gots some thinking to do. I’m feeling somewhat depressed right now.

    EmKitt, I’m in Melbourne with him, as you know I’m a Sydney gal. You must be aware of the suburb I’m referring to down here in Melb?

    I’ve wanted fealkj to burn in hell for as long as I can remember.

  57. I met some lesbians once on a bus ride home. They had sex six times a day, apparently. But then my friend vomited and they had to go away…

    @fealkj: I’m gay and I know I certainly try to suck off all of my friends all the time. Them being straight only makes me more sexually agressive.

  58. Who's That Girl?

    Word – Don’t be depressed! No worries. Lead that mongoloid out of your life. You deserve a Joe! Or nuff, he’s cool too :-)

  59. And as for this being my dear diary, I’m sitting here on a freezing Melbourne day, and he’s snoring on the bed. I don’t have anyone other than you guys to vent to at this moment, just had to get a bit of frustration out ok.

    WTG/Madonna, I’d love to watch some lesbian porn with you right now.

  60. @Word
    I understand the depression, but it’s time to walk away. Obviously I don’t really know anything about you, but I have to assume that’s the conclusion you will come to. Being hateful is fun on the internet, but in real life it’s shit.

    @Mikefu
    A challenge is a wonderful thing. I’m guessing it’s like chess, but with penises for pieces.

    @WTG?
    I don’t get an endorsement? TRAITOROUS WHORE!

  61. You’re right WTG, nuff rocks, he likes beer as much as I do.

  62. Who's That Girl?

    Let’s see Word – it’s 1:30am on my side of the planet. On Skinemax we got “Bad and Busy”, “The Erotic Traveler”, or “Alien Sex Files 3″. Your choice. Do they get Skinemax down under?

  63. Who's That Girl?

    Soup – I was saving you for myself…FUCKASS!

  64. @ Soup: pretty much, I’m the queen and my goal is to get all of my friends (the pawns) to the other side and make them queens as well.

  65. I know you know very little about me Soup, but you know I ain’t no idiot. I said a week or so ago, I felt like I was on the Titanic, and that I was sensing an iceberg, well guess what?, I just hit it.

  66. WTG?, clever girl. I appreciate your duplicitous nature. Although, the first movie is actually titled “Bad and Busty”. Big difference. I need to know if this was a Freudian slip, or just a typo.

  67. WTG, I don’t know if we do, but there are several sex/adult shops just across the way from where I am now. I think I should go down there for a browse, as there ain’t no action in this room, let me tell you.

    Counting the hours til I get on that fuckin’ plane again and go back home.

  68. @Mikefu
    I might let you watch me polish my bishop, but that would be the extent of it. No way you could rook me over to the other side.

  69. Who's That Girl?

    Soup! NICE! It was a typo, I noticed it after I submitted it. I didn’t think anyone would notice, as the typo still made sense. I see you get Skinemax. Care to select for our viewing pleasure?

    Word – we may be heading toward a threesome here…

  70. Word, 50+ percent of marriages fail. The numbers for dating have to be downright abysmal. Have some fun and move on to something better.

    My last girlfriend wasn’t sure if she believed in evolution. Strangely enough, that relationship lasted about 4 months.

  71. Who's That Girl?

    Apparently, mu husband has decided on “Alien Sex Files 3″. Better make it a foursome…

  72. @WTG?
    I do, of course, get Skinemax, but their porn has not done anything for me since my teenage years. Now I need something a little more titillating, like the DVD I’m watching now: Bitches In High Heels Stomping On My Balls. Robot Anal Violation is next in the queue.

  73. My marriage failed too Soup, but that’s cool, at least 2 fantastic things came out of that.

    I’ve had fun, but yep, time to move on, and thanks for the laugh on your last line there buddy.

    WTG, there’s always that possibility when I’m around, but I feel like browsing the sex shops right now. I see a man sitting outside the shop wanking in his car as we speak. What an entertaining street this is.

  74. Well while you guys organise your transpacific foursome, I think I might settle down for a nice game of chess.

  75. Oh, and that comment too, you funny fuckin’ bastard.

  76. Wow, a lot happened while I was gone.

    @word, long distance relationships are sucky at the best of times. Continuing a relationship with someone who makes you angry and depressed AND lives 900km away? I’m sure you know that ain’t right.

    My partner and I lived half that distance apart for 2 years and we managed to make it work, but only because he is a sweet, kind supportive guy, who is even doing the majority of the housework as well as working full time now that I’m out of action with a herniated disc (for the second time, mind you).

    I’m sure you’ll find the guy for you one day, but I’m pretty sure that’s not him (jewellery is a bonus though, huh?). And by the way, vent on here all you like ;)

  77. Who's That Girl?

    @Soup – Lucky for me, it doesn’t take much to get me aroused.

    @Word – You can never go wrong with flicking your bean! But on a serious note – you got a good head on your shoulders. I wish you the best in life.

    All right guys, it’s been real, but the spouse is gettin’ a little frisky now. Time to head out (think I’ll put my high heels on, in honor of Soup). Enjoy your evening.

  78. Ooooooh, look at EmKitteh subtly rubbing her idyllic life in the faces of us single folks. I SEE WHAT YOU’RE DOING!

  79. Hey Mikefu, my daughter’s best friend is a gay boy, and quite a bit of a queen to boot. He’s absolutely gorgeous, he looks like Chris Martin from Coldplay.

    The ONLY problem I have with hot gay men is that I can’t have them.

  80. @Soup, does your idea of an idyllic life involve back pain, muscle spasms, sciatica, not being able to sit or stand for an extended period and not being able to lift anything heavier than a bath towel?

  81. I agree with Soup.

    EmKitt, thanks for that, I think I’ll go put my head in the toilet and just keep flushing.
    Actually that sounds like a porn I saw recently.

    I’m off lovers, the sex shop awaits.

  82. Oh EmKitt, just saw that, sorry darlin’. I’d help you out if I could. Come down to Commercial Rd and we’ll have a beer, and go to the sex shop together.

  83. I’d love to keep you company, word, but I think pyjamas and dvds are going to keep me here this evening.

    This is why I haven’t been commenting a lot lately. I’m not in the right frame of mind to be entertaining. I’m trying though.

  84. @EmKitteh

    Well, I’m sitting here with an eggplant up my ass while sticking needles in my taint, just to be able to feel something. But I know pain isn’t for everyone, so I hope you feel better.

  85. @Soup

    Thanks. I hope you feel… something

  86. I find you in the morning… after dreams of distant signs
    You pour yourself over me like the sun through the blinds
    You lift me up and get me out
    Keep me walking but never shout
    “Hold the secret close”, I hear you say

    You know the way it throws about.
    It takes you in and spits you out
    It spits you out when you desire
    to conquer it, to feel you’re higher
    To follow it you must be clean,
    with mistakes that you do mean
    Move the heart, switch the pace
    Look for what seems out of place

    Yeah on and on it goes, calling like a distant wind
    Through the zero hour we’ll walk… cut the thick and break the thin
    No sound to break, no moment clear
    when all the doubts are crystal clear
    Crashing hard into the secret wind

    You know the way it twists and turns
    Changing colour, spinning yarns
    You know the way it leaves you dry
    It cuts you up, it takes you high
    You know the way it’s painted gold
    Is it honey? Is it gold?
    You know the way it throws about.
    It takes you in and spits you out
    Cuts you up!

    You know the way it throws about.
    It takes you in and spits you out
    It spits you out when you desire
    to conquer it, to feel you’re higher
    To follow it you must be clean,
    with mistakes that you do mean
    Move the heart, switch the pace
    Look for what seems out of place
    Cuts you up!

    It’s okay… it goes this way
    The line is thin, it twists away
    Cuts you up, It throws about
    Keep me walking, but never shout.

  87. @Mikefu #65 Do you mean checkers? Chess could be analogous as well though. You have a group pf gay guys with chainsaws and a group of straight guys. The gay guys pick off the straight guys one by one until only their leader is left, then they corner him so he can’t get away.

    @Soup Just realized that you are probably one of the few people if not the only person whom could use the words eggplant, ass, needles, and taint in a single sentence without me finding it odd. I honestly read through the comments and then as I was looking for Word’s last one, reread it again. It seems that on first reading it made perfect sense and didn’t stick out to me.

    @Word Do not make yourself aggravated for 3 more days, call up and get your flight switched and call a cab. You haven’t even been with him for four months yet and any explanation you would have owed him has been voided by his hatred and general doucheness. Leave him a note along the lines of…

    “Thanks for the four joyous months we’ve shared, but alas as you hate gays, and I myself hate bigots, our love is doomed to be unrequited. -Word”

    As for Lamebook being your journal, if you want it to, it can be. Hell you can start every post with “Dear Lamedook” and end with “Love, Word”, and still your posts would be in the top 5% so whatever with all that.

  88. I had a browse
    Went to the bank
    Then bought some porn
    Now off to wank

    Soup, your comment reminded me of that notorious killer from New York in the 1930′s, Albert Fish. Needles in the taint was his thing.

    He’s desd, so I know you’re not him.

  89. Thank you Nonnie.

  90. Word, you have restored my faith. The needles comment was a direct reference to the Fish (but not one I really expected anyone to recognize). I was just going to respond to Nonnie that my tendency to be absurd and/or vulgar has made people discount anything else I say.

    I’ve noticed that when I try to be clever, the silence is deafening. But I throw out a crusty vag joke and the audience goes wild. Maybe I should provide some more clues, but I hate telegraphing a joke.

    Life as an internet comedian is a thankless task.

  91. Walter Sobchak

    James should explain the importance of PPE (Personal Protective Equipment) and lubricating oil to Daniel. Then Daniel will be covered whether he decides to become a lumberjack or a homosexual.

  92. Walter Sobchak

    “Out, Out – ”
    by Robert Frost

    The buzz saw snarled and rattled in the yard
    And made dust and dropped stove-length sticks of wood,
    Sweet-scented stuff when the breeze drew across it.
    And from there those that lifted eyes could count
    Five mountain ranges one behing the other
    Under the sunset far into Vermont.
    And the saw snarled and rattled, snarled and rattled,
    As it ran light, or had to bear a load.
    And nothing happened: day was all but done.
    Call it a day, I wish they might have said
    To please the boy by giving him the half hour
    That a boy counts so much when saved from work.
    His sister stood beside him in her apron
    To tell them “Supper.” At the word, the saw,
    As if it meant to prove saws know what supper meant,
    Leaped out at the boy’s hand, or seemed to leap –
    He must have given the hand. However it was,
    Neither refused the meeting. But the hand!
    Half in appeal, but half as if to keep
    The life from spilling. Then the boy saw all –
    Since he was old enough to know, big boy
    Doing a man’s work, though a child at heart –
    He saw all was spoiled. “Don’t let him cut my hand off –
    The doctor, when he comes. Don’t let him, sister!”
    So. The hand was gone already.
    The doctor put him in the dark of ether.
    He lay and puffed his lips out with his breath.
    And then – the watcher at his pulse took a fright.
    No one believed. They listened to his heart.
    Little – less – nothing! – and that ended it.
    No more to build on there. And they, since they
    Were not the one dead, turned to their affairs.

  93. @Word No biggie, things will get better, hopefully sooner reather than later.

    @Soup Stick with clever, it suits you. ;) Although crusty vag jokes have there place, as a New Yorker I caught your reference to Mr. Fish on the second reading, thought I wrote that but alas I did not.

  94. @ Nonnie: I’m a fan of both games, so whether you’d like to assosciate me with sexually dominating straight men or viciously cutting them down with a chainsaw is completely up to you. Just no backgammon analogies, I never really got into that game.

    @ Walter: Thanks for the chuckles. I enjoyed your lumberjack-homosexual suggestion.

  95. @soup You are an Internet comedian of the highest quality, a great wingman, and a noble human being… With needles in his taint apparently. I salute you.
    @word word, word, word… Ahh, what to do with you. It seems as though each guy breaks after 4 months in one way or another. What you need is some good ol’ Canadian lovin’. Easy goin’, best beer on the continent (American beer tastes too watered down, bleh), love the outdoors and boombastic sex (I can’t remember where I heard that word from, but I like it). Also, pornhub is the shit when flyin’ solo ;)
    @WTG you’re gone for the night, but I miss ya! How was Alien Sex Files 3?

  96. I’m not a homophobe-phobe, but I wouldn’t want them around my kids either… especially if they confuse gay people and chainsaws…

  97. …I wanted to become a Lumberjack.

    “Oh, I’m a Lumberjack and I’m okay
    I sleep all night and I work all day
    I chop down trees
    I wear high heels
    suspenders and a bra

    I wish I’d been a girly…”

  98. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5zey8567bcg

  99. I’m not a sexist. I’m not a lawnchairist either. I just don’t think either women or lawnchairs are particularly good at maths.

  100. I’m a lumberjack and I’m okay,I sleep all night and I work all day.
    Chorus: He’s a lumberjack and he’s okay,He sleeps all night and he works all day.
    I cut down trees, I eat my lunch,I go to the lavatory.On Wednesdays I go shopping And have buttered scones for tea.
    Mounties: He cuts down trees, he eats his lunch,He goes to the lavatory.On Wednesdays he goes shoppingAnd has buttered scones for tea.
    Chorus: He’s a lumberjack and he’s okay,He sleeps all night and he works all day.
    I cut down trees, I skip and jump,I like to press wild flowers.I put on women’s clothing,And hang around in bars.
    Mounties: He cuts down trees, he skips and jumps,He likes to press wild flowers.He puts on women’s clothing,And hangs around in bars.
    Chorus: He’s a lumberjack and he’s okay,He sleeps all night and he works all day.
    I cut down trees, I wear high heels,Suspendies and a bra.I wish I’d been a girlie,Just like my dear momma.
    Mounties: He cuts down trees, he wears high heels?Suspendies…and a bra?…he’s a lumberjack and he’s okay,He sleeps all night and he works all day….he’s a lumberjack and he’s OKAAAAAAAAAAYYY.He sleeps all night and he works all day.

  101. Who's That Girl?

    Nuff! I missed you too! Tried to get my husband to play the guitar on my back last night, but as he doesn’t know how to play, the random strumming of off key singing of kumbaya just didn’t do it for me…sadface

  102. Golly, I feel like I know you guys now.
    The 4 month thing eh? Last boyfriend I had dumped me after 4 months….on Valentine’s Day. Class A douchebag that one.

  103. Unless Daniel is 7 and has particulary vulgar gay friends, I must add to the cries of ‘How homophobic!’

    Also my bro has a 3-month rule with girls, perhaps this is not uncommon?
    Apparently after 3 months the sex just goes downhill.
    I disagree. I say 6 months.

  104. lemon i agree, at three months its still all good. It sucks but its true

  105. @wtg I’ll get you a pearl necklace and turn that frown upside down.

    Nope, after 6 months is when you start suggesting the more kinky shit seeing as you have built a foundation to the relationship and can now gangbang her, have three ways with other women, go to swinger parties, and romp in public paces. Keeps things exciting. Or you know, some good ol’ fashioned BDSM.

  106. if it takes you 6 months to get that far you’re not doing it right.

  107. Yeah, you can skip the waiting period by meeting them at the swinger party or with excessive amounts of alcohol. But then they just lay there on their back unconscious, and that’s called rape.

  108. Only if they remember xD

  109. They’ll remember the gape.

  110. Firstly, @2HB – awesome gratuitous Harry Potter reference.
    Secondly @Soup ‘lesbians are cool’ – Yes. We know and thank you.
    In general, sex only gets worse if you let it. Might I recommend sex in public places? Or some props, perhaps?

  111. I’ve not to let it. Used props too, but they get grumpy when you have them tied up all the time.

    Lesbians are cool and know it? Lame xD

  112. *tried not to let it

    also what gape?
    A gaping hole?
    Yes they probably would remember that, but I only use holes that are already there, otherwise they get suspicious.

  113. Lesbians being cool? Not completely true. An old ex of mine left me for another girl, and that other chick was an absolute man-hating bitch. Very uncool, though I did try for a threesome before finding new meat lol.

    Lmao @ having them tied up all the time
    and I’m referring to the anal gape

  114. @rwl THANK YOU. i was beginning to think it was a reference wasted on all you Lamebook philistines ;)

  115. If it weren’t for you 2HB, I wouldn’t have gone to that group and saw the pictures. They were surprisingly funny. Extra Harry.

  116. coldestcaress

    James is an asshole. At least it seems like Daniel’s turned out to be a half-decent human being…

  117. Way to be a jerk, James.

  118. myfaceyourface

    why don’t we just go back to the Roman/Greek way of thinking and be all lesbian and gay all the time…. no one cared, except for all the higher levels of sexually transmitted diseases due to so much gay sex. But we have condoms now and pills, and all those things….well some of them…not saying all gays have a higher risk of having diseases but that is why the pope banned gayness back in the day….
    and not saying that all gays are there for the sexy time,…. but i must say, i do love sexy time myself…
    so its okay James…

  119. Someone was raped by the gay version of Jason.

  120. Soup, I may not be able to pick a good man, but boy, do I know my serial killers, so keep those obscure references coming.

    Nonnie, anyone who hails from New York is a friend of mine.

  121. Ever get the impression that the vast majority of homophobes are closet homosexuals?

  122. It’s almost like they are saying, “ewwwwww, get away from me with all that gay stuff! I might pop a shtupper and confirm eeryone’s suspicions.”

  123. *everyone’s

  124. @2HB Roxy Music?

  125. @YeahToast yes and no, it is that song but it’s a cover which appeared in the movie Velvet Goldmine and it’s fantastic. I’m just glad no one made pencil jokes.

  126. Who's That Girl?

    Tired from a long night and in need of a fresh post. *sips coffee*

    Let’s move it Lamebook!

  127. I think his homophobia is justified. I mean it’s well known fact that if your child hangs out with the gays long enough it WILL be molested/raped by them and catch the queer.

  128. pineapplesalad

    @Shipoopi

    It’s true, my father died that way.

  129. James is either a huge prick or had a shameful affair in the past with a lumberjack. I’m going with both theories, but I don’t blame the lumberjack. It can’t be easy to control your impulses while surrounded by so much hard wood all day.

  130. The best thing about this post is the title of this page.

  131. lol his dad is obviously a closet gay.

  132. Who's That Girl?

    I view malteaser as Silent Bob – never talks, but the when he does, it’s poetry ♥

  133. FlonkertonChamp

    wow. i would like to punch james mcjackass in the face.

  134. my dad tryd to stop me from hangin out wit my biffle, we were in yr 7 nd gettin arvos nd shit allllll the time, he full rang the school and everything, nd they hacked my facebook nd blocked him, but we still hang all the time :D

  135. i love malteaser too

    WTG: Malteaser is a girl.I take her word for it.

  136. Malteaser is a girl?

    I had this image of Kevin Smith myself, the whole time. Now I don’t know what to think. Up is down, black is white, malteaser’s a girl, left is right…

  137. Who's That Girl?

    STFU! Malteaser is a girl? I thought only men could have that kind of casual subtleness. Or maybe I just like to run my mouth a lot…

  138. Walter Sobchak

    Aussie_Kid,

    It’s “tried” not “tryd.” And what’s a biffle? And what do you mean “gettin arvos?” I know “arvo” means afternoon.

    And has anybody explained the importance of lubricating oil and PPE to you?

  139. Aussie Kid learn to spell, you’re embarrassing us all (by us I mean Australians).

    James just wants his kids to avoid homosexuals, what’s wrong with that? He can’t help that he isn’t comfortable with something that isn’t natural. He might be afraid his kid will turn into Justin Beiber.

  140. Warning, the statement above me is homophobic.

    Genius, believing it to not be natural is homophobic. Of course it’s natural, why would anyone decide to be gay? So that they could end up getting ridiculed by homophobic people like you?

  141. Warning, afsd94 is gay.

    Moron, thinking it’s natural to stick your dick where you shit. You’re dumb.

  142. hey asshole guess what? its none of your business where people stick their dicks

    besides, you have to be a real moron to think that homossexuality is contagious. its like not wanting your kids to be around gingers cause it might turn their hair red

  143. I don’t know.. I wouldn’t want my kids hanging out with gingers.

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