Lamesters Archive

Why Oscar’s a Grouch

lamester5

lildick

Rule #1: Don’t post poorly spelled, personal details from your weekend on Facebook. Judging by your impeccable spelling it’s safe to assume you are still in that same vulnerable state. I can’t believe Oscar got you drunk and ate you out. I hate when guys buy girls drinks all night, get them drunk, then take them home to orally pleasure them. I mean, props for getting some, but publicly posting that stuff just to take Oscar down makes you look a little … you know … whore-ish.  In the end, however, it does sound like Oscar got the short end of the stick (no pun intended).

♥ The Editors

David is “That Guy”

lamester4

davidthatguy

Congrats David. You think you’re the suave guitar playing babe slayer, when in fact you are a douche. Stop playing crash into me or else.

♥ The Editors

What Just Happened?

lamester3

whatjusthappened

WHAT? YeeEEA! oKaYYyY! GuRL, U iz KAAAAAARRRRRAAAAZYYYY!!!!


I have no clue what your name is, so I am going to call you Profile Girl. Not only do you have amazing taste in music, you like Shrek! And not just Shrek 1, you like all 3!!!


Good hygiene???  Check.


Great Speller? Check.


Overuse of the tilde? Check.


Profile Girl, It’s safe to say that you are my dream girl. You, Me,  CRACKER BAREL, this Saturday.

♥ The Editors

O Brother-In-Law

lamester1

sistersrack

Tiffany,

We all need to thank Ken for a lesson he is trying to teach us. That lesson is “when it comes to relationships, communication is vital.” Sure, Ken made a crack about your sister’s breasts, but at least he used a non-derogatory term. What you need to realize, Tiff, is that Ken is considering your feelings. I’m sure he could have called you to apologize, but he wanted everyone to know how sorry he was, by posting it on the World Wide Web (despite his misspelling of the word “didn’t”). Nothing says healthy relationship like Facebook exploitation.

♥ The Editors

Also Ken, kick ass truck bro, but next time zoom in a little. It’s hard to make out that kick ass TapOut sticker on the back window.

Wow.

lamester

wow

Actual Dialogue preceding this photo:

Krista: Ok girl, you just need to stand there and act really shocked, I’m going to stand over here and make a gun with my hands!
Ada: Oh Krista, you crazy! This is almost as funny as the time you asked those Indian people in Starbucks if they were terrorists.
Krista: Haha oh yea!  …. That reminds me, we should totally get a frappacinno after this.
♥ The Editors

Zack Attack

lamester41

zackattack

Zack.  Dude.  Take it down a notch.
Now I’m not gonna lie; Colorado is a beautiful place.  But just because you’re there doesn’t mean you can’t pop a few Xanax here and there, OK?  These posts are telling me you have a shit-ton of pent up energy just surging through those fingertips of yours like giant bolts of mountain dew-powered lighting.  I’m glad you’re having a good summer, but let’s just take it a bit easier on the Caps Lock button from here on out.
♥ The Editors