Friday, September 10, 2010

Boys N Girls

previous post: Snappy Snaps

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52 Comments

  1. It must be so embarassing to be Jacob and stuck on a mommy complex. Make your own damn lunch she’s your wife not your mother… and no such thing as “I’s”

  2. I personally like the first one :)

  3. Hahaha Tighe (wtf kind of name is that by the way?) for the win!

  4. Jessica is a woman of much wisdom.
    Brian is a man of much wanking.

  5. Behind every sandwich joke is an unoriginal twat.

  6. I’s lunches? haha

    This is I lunch. A lunch just for I.

  7. Behind every surprised woman is a man with his pants around his ankles.

    Haha.. buttsex joke.

  8. aaron, i felt the same way about my dreamcast.

  9. What are lunchables? Some sort of sandwich snack thing?

  10. Crappy little prepackaged lunches.

    http://brands.kraftfoods.com/lunchables/varieties.aspx?navID=new-lunchables&productID=turkey-and-cheddar-sub

  11. muchas gracias, scarab, those sound awful. i like my food sans the synthetic meat and cheese.

  12. Trust me lunchables are God, the meat somehow manages to taste like everything and nothing at the same time.

    Jessica really screwed up a good quote and for that I think she should be fed to the jews, it’s actually,
    “Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.”

  13. *fed to the lions
    (damn bible classes fucking with my subconscious.)

  14. Hobo, I’d suggest most sandwich jokes come from unoriginal c@cks, not twats, but in principle I agree.

  15. @greenstrings the meat doesn’t concern me too much, being a vege and all, :) so I’ll take your word for it. lol @ the freudian slip btw. maybe we SHOULD feed them to the jews.

  16. I hope there was more in the kid’s lunch box than that. That’s an awful lunch for a kid. Heard of fruit?

  17. I doubt there was anything decent in that lunch box, Em. Did you see that shit thing? And what a ridiculous bloody name – Lunchables. What brainiac thought of that?

    By the way, I hope you’re recovering well.

  18. “I’s”? That’s gotta be the win of the week, but anyway, it’s just I’s opinion.

  19. Charlotte Sometimes

    Why’s everyone hating on lunchables… Some of them are delicious.

  20. Thanks word, today is definitely a turning point, pain-wise, and I haven’t had any bleeding. But I think I’ll need some retail therapy and a haircut before I can say I’m fully recovered ;)

    I still have another 9 days off from “following my daily occupation”.

  21. Lunchables were the greatest food a kid could have for some reason. They were the nicest thing ever, despite the meat being made of rubber.

  22. I don’t know if Munchables are the same thing, but I get them as a snack sometimes. They come with M&M minis so are awesome =P

    I’ve actually not heard Jessica’s comeback before, so props to her.

  23. Lunchables mustard is I’s favorite lubricant for when I pick up a trannie from the singles bar.

  24. Thanks to Lamebook, I went out today and bought a pack of Lunchables, which I’m eating right now.

    Damn it, these things should not be this nice.

  25. Also annoyingly unfilling.

    Maybe Kraft should send us some free ones as a thanks for the plug.

  26. Jessica got it wrong. Men who are not afraid of “commanding” women are those who will get sandwhiches done and will never suffer a sortage of volunteers to do so. While, in the opposite side, those afraid to do so, will need the tissue and the lotion.

  27. @26: I will make a sandwich for someone who asks. I will shove a sandwich up the ass of someone who “commands” it. So, I think you got it wrong. Although the sandwich “got done”.

    I’m sure any man who is “commanded” by a woman would feel the same way.

  28. Usually, health food gives a much needed bitch-slap to the brain matter. But first, one needs to actually have brain matter.

    I’s just sayin’.

    And BritishHobo – If you’re still hungry after one, spank open another one, or at least chase the first one with a couple of boxes of Juicy-Juice. Are you a man or a mouse?

  29. @jesusmotherbug

    Do you really think I got it wrong? Check about Male Alpha and come back again. Men who fail at being assertive and “commanding” with women are either alone or passive members of a relationship.

    Mind that I’m not talking about giving orders, that’s why I say “commanding”, between quotation marks.

  30. Vabadus, speaking from personal experience:
    Yes, you’re wrong.

  31. I’ll speak from own experience :

    I am correct and I blame my mother for “teaching” me that women are always right and that men have to obey and never argue.

  32. Just for clarification’s sake, I’m not talking about things like “Woman! Make me a sandwhich” but I suppose you know that already.

  33. vabadus, there’s a big difference between commanding and assertive. what you’re suggesting is a sort of ‘obedience’ from women (the inverse of your mothers teachings?) when what I think you should be aiming for is a little less control freak, a little more balanced.

    ease up on the idea of alpha male as an ideal, cuz I assure you, as a woman, it’s not quite as effective as you think.

  34. I’m using “commanding” because I lack a better word for it.

    Control freak? It’s totally the opposite, since a control freak has lot of security issues, which is not the case for an alpha male.

    Self-pride, self-love, self-confidence. Taking the lead, being assertive, defending your ideals and taking an active/agressive stance in life works, not just with women, but with everything.

    “Behind every good man there is a surprised woman” reeks insecurity and bitterness. A woman who strongly believes this will end with a real commanding (who literally gives orders) man, someone insecure and full of complexes.

  35. EmKitt, that’s really good news. I’m sure they told you delayed bleeding can occur up to 14 days post-op, so remain mindful of that, ok.

    A shopping trip and haircut will definitely aid your recovery. They’re the two things that make us girls feel good at anytime.

    Hobes, rubber meat and processed cheese does it for you? Stuff that. Get your ass over here and I’ll make you a sandwich.

  36. Yay, we have a new troll!

  37. Pepperoni pizza lunchables are the best! Those are the only ones I’ll eat. I’ll sometimes ditch my sandwich and run to the store on my lunch break just because I’ve got a craving for the stupid thing. Processed and somewhat fake, yes! But oh so damn good!

  38. pepperoni ones are gross….worse than cold pizza…..btw JACOB FTW…

  39. I quote ”don’t pick that up, you don’t know where its been”…
    Yea I think that about all processed meats…

    Aha yes I now remember the point I was going to make…. talking about completely unrecognisable processed meats, i’m surprised vabadus’s ”meat” has not been brutally processed by women who have learned about his alpha male attitude!

  40. If you were a little kid in America in the 90s and you brought a lunchable to school you were the envy of all your classmates. One kid gave me 10 dollars for a lunchable when I was like 9. Lunchables were straight up ambrosia. Then you get older and realize that while they are still pretty decent they aren’t anywhere as good as you thought they were. Trust me though, lunchables were the pokemon cards of food.

  41. Lunchables have been around since the 90s? Whoa, am I feeling the Third-World-Blues.

  42. what goes around comes around, june.

    example – poncey twats buy cans of coconut juice from their hip local deli in the broadway market in east london for £4 a throw.

  43. Perspective is delicious, alord.

    …Also, ‘poncey’? You’ll have to ‘splain that one to me. I know what twat is, thanks to a particularly foul-mouthed British cousin o’ mine.

  44. hmmmmm…. i always seem to complain about the crap that lamebook always put, but now lamebook ain’t putting anything up!!!!

    Im SORRY Lamebook…. i will not complain about the crap you put up anymore! :P

  45. http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=ponce

    p.s. cass – it’s sunday. lamebook goes to church on the sabbath – fargis absolves everything and preaches hellfire. lb riveted to pew. no i-phones or blackberries allowed in the church of dan, hence no new posts.

  46. The Church of Dan: come for the bigotry, stay for the coffee.

  47. This morning on the train, behind one surprised woman was me pinching a sexy ass.

  48. Walter, that was you?

  49. eenerbl, that was you?

  50. I never even realized you’re black!! Are we still on for tomorrow night? You know most of the stuff I say on here is just jokes right?

  51. The Church of Dan….
    Population:10.
    Number of currently active extremists:10.
    Future population: minus 20.
    Number of suicides caused by hearing of such a religion: millions.
    Popularity: very poor at best:

    My opinion:Kill Dan at all costs!

  52. Just like Terry every time I walk into a singles bar I hear my mums’ wise words.

    “Always slip the Rohypnol into the girls drink surreptitously whilst she is distracted.”

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