Thursday, July 8, 2010

Bent Out of MISHApe

previous post: The Misinformed

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132 Comments

  1. STEVER!

  2. wauw O.O

  3. fuckfuck, i wanted to be first stever!!
    damn u
    :)

  4. Herpes isn’t all that bad! Oh Misha, i applaud your justification system…

  5. I almost didn’t make it, insanity. I got caught up in reading the comment drama that went down 2 posts ago!

  6. Tsk repost and tsk fake.

  7. keepitunscripted

    seriously this is fucking ridiculous with the fake stuff. Isn’t it obvious how fake this is. Glad to see moderation fail.

  8. Krazy Eyez Killa

    Poor Ellen, love how he points out she might not have had sex with him and then tells her she can’t always get what she wants? She definitely didn’t want herpes. The last two comments are hilarious. Christ, Misha, talking about digging yourself into a hole.

  9. This seems very familiar. Was this posted before already?

  10. Aw, man. I love Facebook, it opens up a whole new world of over-sharing. Have diarrhea? Post it. Got drunk and puked? Post it. Got herpes? Post it. I get to learn so many new things about people that I’ve never, ever wanted to know.

  11. I wonder if they know that a condom won’t stop you from transmitting herpes…

  12. I don’t see how this is fake. If you mean the thing with her talking to Chad before he comments, pretty sure he deleted an earlier comment, since she later responds to his other one.

    Anyway, screw calling fake, this was back to what made Lamebook awesome. And if it is real (which I hope), Misha’s done a WAY more efficient job than Ellen has of ensuring he’ll never, EVER get laid again…

  13. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    For the record,I don’t think Yoink (the real real one), Hobo, Stever or Danny boy(especially) should leave this site. That was out mega troll speaking not me.

  14. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    Also this is a repost from a while ago.

  15. yep, definitely a repeat post. I don’t understand how lamebook can be completely unaware…or maybe they purposefully repost older ones to make up for all the crap posts they’ve been getting lately.

  16. BH – agreed. ;)

    I’m thinking Chad is one of the “2 others” that liked the original post… it makes sense if you squint your eyes and turn your head to the side. I think.

  17. krasivaya_devushka

    Misha is a guy’s name? And I’m not reading this; waaaaaaay too long, so I’ll just stick to reading the comments.

  18. Wampire_Wambulance

    http://www.lamebook.com/stmids

    still funny, though.

  19. No Dan Fargis! Hellyeah. Maybe he’s dead. Let’s hope so.

  20. Lol she woulda caught herpes anyway, like Spastastic said. Also I can’t think of the name Misha without having to think “Miiiishaaaaa” like in Hannibal Rising.

  21. wasn’t this already posted a few months ago?

  22. seems like a bit too much overshare even for FB. Herpes still carries so much stigma that no one is going to admit this shit.

  23. I’m surprised dan fargis didn’t comment on their sinful deeds

  24. I’m not sure where Kayla lives, but in Missouri it definitely is not illegal to withhold the fact you have an STD. Even AIDS. That is a complete and utter lie that I don’t really know where, why, or how it got started.

  25. Well in Canada, it is illegal to have sex with someone if you have HIV or AIDS and don’t tell them. It is called aggravated sexual assault. http://www.cbc.ca/canada/british-columbia/story/2010/06/30/bc-charges-hiv-positive.html

  26. God damn it, I actually read and commented on the other post when it was first put up, and didn’t even remember when I read it this time. -_- Jesus.

    Dukey, ah, that’s cool. Thought it was weird that someone who’d been here as long as you was suddenly turning round claiming I was a troll :P It’s weird, whoever the bellend who was using everyone else’s usernames was, seemed to be obsessed with outing me as yoink and dan_fargis… but that’s a mystery for another day, kids.

  27. Herpes is God’s punishment for having pre-marital sex.

    Food for the stomach and the stomach for food”—but God will destroy them both. The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body. Corinthians 12:21

  28. Amen, brother!

  29. krasivaya_devushka

    Dan #2??

  30. One day stever..And I will beat u

  31. why does some idiot always have 2 bring the fairytale which is the bible into these? herpes is not gods punishment for premarital sex, if you wear a condom then you are not going to get it, so whats that mean? a bit of latex is stronger than gods punishment? actually yeah latex is real after all.

  32. @dan_fargis

    I got herpes from my pastor. Granted, it was premarital sex, but I was 9 years old so I didn’t have a whole lot of choice in the matter. Thankfully, my affliction is of the anal variety, so I haven’t infected my wife.

  33. This was herpetastic. To be honest though, if the girl doesn’t ask before me, i’ll be sure to lay down the question as to whether or not she has any STD’s. Misha could have avoided all of this if he didn’t fuck that hooker, even if she was half off during week days.

  34. And sigh Dan..don’t try to “help” people online, on lamebook for gods sake..
    That’s just wrong in many ways

  35. llllooolllll misha is my kinda d00d ell3n sounds like a total whore i’ve got a name for girls like her………..

    cumdumpster ell3n. f’n ho-bag. mayb u should keep ur legs close h0

  36. Does your shit catch on fire Soup?

  37. No, it is just itchy. Fortunately the lesions blend in with the pimples, so no one notices anything when I shower at the gym.

  38. soup thats f’n nasty u take it in the butt alot? u gettin plowed by a h0 like ell3n?

    i wish i wuz more like misha (no homo)

  39. i 8 ur dog, go fuck a pooch. Though i’m sure your puppy has already died of a prolapsed anus. Your typing is just a genuine eyesore of the bleached variety. Just because yoink got a few fans doesn’t mean ANYBODY else should desecrate the english language as well.

    Soup, that’s excellent news! Though how do you explain the puss? Rough workout?

  40. @i 8 ur dog
    I heard about Koko the gorilla learning sign language, but I had no idea they had given apes keyboards and set them loose on the internet. Kudos. I would love to watch you sensuously eat a banana.

    @nuff
    My swamp-ass is legendary, so no one is really surprised by my leakage.

  41. Kayla’s comment is interesting. So men are able to run down through their afflictions and put on a condom when they are drunk, but women are unable to consent? Um, please pick one.
    I think the lesson here is for Misha to be more honest with his partners and for Ellen to stop raping drunk boys.

  42. @Soup
    They even gave you a nickname for your anal leakage! Those must be some pretty great people you go to the gym with. Personally, squats are one of my favourite exercises when I work out, really works on the glutes, eh?
    And Koko! How could I have forgotten? Good call on that one, I would love to see the webcam video of that.

  43. dan_fargis_is_a_f_a_g

    Damn… Dan_fargis is still alive

  44. am I the only person to notice that the times on both this submission and the same, but older submission, are different ?

  45. i thought i had herpes quite recently. luckily, as i was sitting on the motorway bridge with my legs dangling over the edge, the nhs direct site on my my-phone told me that there was an affliction with the same symptoms as herpes. it was called balanitis. i had suffered myself to penetrate a girl (incidentally, ‘pon a sink in the female lavatory of a london public house), who had a vagina with dangerously high yeast levels. this candida had become trapped beneath my foreskin, under which i subsequently didn’t wash, as i camped out that same night as the intercourse happened, having later that day committed a chain of murders and gone into hiding on the heath.

    anyway, thank god for the internet. i was THIS close to ending it all!

  46. @kornstar: They were screenshotted and sent in by two different people (one at the time, one a while after), so maybe they are from different timezones? The minutes are the same, just not the hours. One of ‘em probably just has their Facebook times set to a different timezone.

  47. Did she like her own status?

  48. I just read the comments on the earlier posts, and now I am so fucking confused. So yoink wasn’t a real person? And now everyone steals names?

  49. Reeeeeeeeepeat.

  50. awww powerstance, every time I see that name I laugh my fucking ass off hysterically. It is a reminder of one of the FUNNIEST pictures i’ve seen on here personally.

  51. krasivaya_devushka

    @48 – Something like that.

  52. Haven’t had time to check out Lamebook for a couple of days, and now that I have, it appears to have imploded.

    It’s no good, I can’t muster up anything other than ‘meh’.

    I’ll miss word and Soup, BritishHobo and a few others though.

  53. @mwnci tal

    What are you, some kind of coward? Things get rough and you turn tail and run? You know I love you and if you would just present your … junk, I will take care of it. See? I care so much that regardless of whether you put forth a pecker or a hooha, I will slather it with my tongue bath of love.

  54. Are you threatening to murder them? Cool.

  55. Ohhhh, threatening to leeeeave… I didn’t get it. Not cool though.

  56. No, not threatening to leave. Just seems that Lamebook is dying a slow and painful death, and when it’s all finally over, I’ll miss a fair few people.

    Being the not-so-secret rubbernecker that I am, I’ll be hanging around to watch.

    Especially if clungem is going to be getting some action off of Soup.

    Hurrah!

  57. Fuck it. That las bit should read, ‘if my clungeis going to be getting some action’

  58. Aaaaaargh. ‘Clunge is’.

    It’s 5:45 am here, that’s my excuse.

  59. Dizzy_Ballerina

    @nuff is true what Soup says …… I even keep a towel soaked in his leakage near my bedside table so I can sniff and feel close…. around here Soup is pretty much the king!

  60. Shit, I’m not going to be able to sleep now, with the thought of getting a Soupy tongue bath. I’m waaaaaaaaaaaay too excited

  61. @Walter
    You’re one of my favorites, so although you hates us all, I will take dan_fargis’ advice and turn the other cheek.

    @mwnci tal
    That is an exotic name. You lead me to believe that you’re a girl. I have to infer that your bush is like the rain forests of South America. I will enjoy exploring the southern regions of your tree line.

    @Dizzy_Ballerina
    Why are you spying on me!

  62. And she will always be my Princess.

  63. Dizzy_Ballerina

    @Soup I know I know the restraining order *sighs* but really I meant no harm

  64. @Soup
    Now I’m all moist. And off to bed…

  65. I don’t hate anybody. I have a sort of distaste for Yoink’s creator.

    But Soup, you are my Princess.

  66. @Dizzy_Ballerina

    You misunderstand me. I don’t want the crazies watching me from a distance. Come on in for a beer. I have my residence listed as a penitentiary, so bondage, sodomy, and confinement are not only state sanctioned, they’re required.

  67. @mwnci tal
    Tease. Just like mom. Got me all worked up and then sent me off to bed.

    @Walter
    You make me feel pretty. Someday my Prince, someday.

  68. I also enjoy most vareties of soup. My favourite might be home-made chicken noodle, but I also really love mushroom soup from a Campbells can. Or even the cheapo Aldi variety.

    I’m a bit of a slurper.

  69. I’ve never felt an urge to be with a man of your age, Walter, however this banter between yourself and soup (countered with the addition of the tongue bath mention) has me yearning for the double team of my life. Time for more wine and a bubble bath. Care to join me gentlemen?

  70. Dizzy_Ballerina

    @Soup anything really anything …… I’ll do anything if I can be your submissive oooh I just creamed myself at the thought

  71. That sounds lovely. Is Agnes invited?

  72. So many options. Word is of course my first choice, but if she’s being Sobchak‘d, with Agnes taking up the rear, I’d hate to be a fourth wheel.

    Maybe if Dizzy could come along? She seems like she gets off really easy so I could just hide my tiny penis inside her all night and hide my shame. It would be perfect!

  73. Dizzy_Ballerina

    *softly moans* oooooh yes please

  74. That’s not me, Soup.

  75. I already said in a previous post if people start fucking with the names, I’m out.

  76. Not you, as in another imposter?

  77. I’ve been at work, and just grabbed a stella from the fridge, and sit down to see this…

  78. Someone is posing as me, yes. Come on, does that sound like me?

  79. Damn. The wine should have given it away. But I would still have a fivesome with you.

  80. With who? Me or the other word?

  81. Well, I suppose both? Sixsome?

  82. Dizzy_Ballerina

    oh, you touch my tralala,
    mmm… my ding ding dong.
    la la la la la la la,
    la la la la la la,
    la la la la la la la.
    Oh, you touch my tralala
    la la la la la la la,
    la la la la la la.
    mmm… my ding ding dong.
    la la la la la la la,
    la la la la la la.

  83. Soup, they post another, and it’s ta ta. I’m very serious here. I haven’t spent my time on here to have someone else come along and take my name. If you have another suggestion, please thrill me with it, as I’m a little pissed right now.

  84. Dizzy_Ballerina

    sorry was looking for mood music for all of us

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iPrnduGtgmc

    think I found it

  85. Walter Sobchak

    Damn I already had the Commodore warming up. And even worse, I’ve already taken one of my special pills.

  86. Real Word, I don’t know what to tell you. I know it’s extremely frustrating, I saw a couple of my imposters earlier. I didn’t like it. But ultimately, the only options are to ride it out or leave.

    I’d really rather you didn’t leave. Take it as a compliment that someone realizes that their personality is so shitty, they have to latch on to someone who is established to get any attention.

  87. Dizzy, I swear, that song was playing in every strip club I visited in Germany.

  88. Dizzy_Ballerina

    no drooling here I agree with Soup …… it’s you we luv Word not someone who is pretending to be you. I can track IPs and I’m sure LB can too, send them the post # and time stamp and its easy. So if you really want to make them stop get LB to ban their mac address

  89. Walter Sobchak

    Yeah. I guess we should all email lamebook to get this name thing fixed.

    I hope somebody imposters me before they fix it, but I probably wouldn’t notice anyway.

    It’s about time for me to leave work.

    See ya dudes.

  90. Dizzy_Ballerina

    oh i’m so sorry Soup lol

  91. Dizzy_Ballerina

    later Walter be sure and seek medical attention if that pill effects you longer then 4 hours :P

  92. Fair enough, and we shall see. I’m fairly certain many here rather it I stay. I’ve seen it today, but you know where I’m coming from, right? I saw it happen to that Boz fella some time ago. That wasn’t pretty. I don’t want to have to start saying all that “That’s not me!” bullshit. How fucking tedious.

    Just so you KNOW- no matter what happens, Mistress Word will always love you.

  93. Oh, and thanks for your bit for team “real word”, Dizzy.

  94. SouthBeachTakeover

    I could write a book with all this drama

    Laughs, thieves, and orgies.
    The Story of Lamebook

  95. You know my feelings on your status. I wasn’t around for the Boz situation, but I would totally understand if it became a recurring problem, that it would be time to leave.

    I found this place by accident and decided to make fun of some goof in the comments, and then never left. If it ever stopped being fun, then I’d just have to close my internet account and go visit Dizzy.

  96. This place was referred to me by a young Frenchman. A total hot piece of ass who looks exactly like Adrian Grenier from Entourage. Sadly, I didn’t get to do him, but I found Lamebook. I’d really like to continue here, and hopefully, I can ride this little bump. I’m in dire need of riding something.

  97. On that note, I shall retire for the evening. I must go frock up for a big night in the city. Hopefully, comment #69 (how poetic) was an isolated aberration.

    And to #69 wordpervert, nice try, but I don’t drink wine and take bubble baths. I drink beer in the shower.

  98. Mmm, shower beer.

    Even better when you get a bit of soap in there.

    In other news, if everyone is such in arms about this name stealing, you could at least take the initiative to contact Lamebook. Not that it’s guaranteed to work but you never know.

  99. yoink was never ever funny, and obviously fake. I was dumbfounded by the sheer number of folk who believed this person to be real. I’m glad she’s revealed herself. Ms Yoink, stay in the community and be yourself? I’m a lurker, not really a poster.
    Dan Fargis and ye olde Elixabeth amuse me enough. And I miss Malteaser a whole lot.

    Yesssssss. This is a repost. How does Lamebook manage to not know what they’ve already put up?

  100. Isn’t Misha the name of someone’s pet husky? Hmmm…

  101. “Note: Temporarily, new account creation is suspended while developers work to combat spammers. Please check back later!” – http://codex.wordpress.org/Main_Page . I’m hoping this is for real….

  102. Really? Because I miss the Alens. Both 001 and 002.

  103. Faithama, I assume there are multiple Lamebook mods. Some mod one day, others mod the next day. That doesn’t seem implausible to me.

    If it’s just one person running the whole site, then I have to give kudos.

  104. I feel it necessary to point out that condoms to not prevent against herpes.

  105. Paranoid Android

    Right, having skimmed previous comments:-

    What’s the dealio with yoink?

    Are people still doing the lame ‘pretending to be other people’ thing?

    Has anyone got laid?

    Is herpes now cool?

    Has Frodo got a pool yet?

  106. yoink had a sex change

    people will always = lame

    Sadly no..been a few weeks..Im almost to the point where my standards are as follows:
    1) cooch
    2) head
    3) warm body
    4) heart beat

    Frodo has a hot tub

  107. In order of significance of course

  108. Paranoid Android

    Much obliged Wookie, few weeks man, that’s harsh.

  109. Ah man, just as I thought Lamebook was getting back to normal, the moron name-stealer returns.

    Yeah! Stealing people’s names and leaving comments that sound so similar to their’s, nobody but them notices! You’re a genius! -_-

  110. Hobo,

    I don’t even know what normal is around here anymore. This place is a fucking mess. I can’t even be bothered with reading the comments anymore. Damn shame.

  111. Bucky, I second that!

  112. @100

    Misha is a commonly used boy name in Russia and ex-Sovjet states. An abbreviation of ‘Michael’.

  113. I don’t understand how you steal someone’s name. Feeling stupid right now.

  114. Mamalumps, I didn’t either.. But then they stole my name.. I don’t know why, I think it was because I said that it was impossible. But they told britishhobo that i want her to lick my dildo after i stick it up her ass..

  115. Amd Bucky, I agree. The comments used to be, by far, the best part. But now it’s just silly. -.-

  116. krasivaya_devushka

    Her?
    Isn’t BritishHobo a guy?

  117. die fake word.

  118. CommentsAtLarge

    @mass

    I second that, except it should read “die screaming”

  119. .. on fire.

    Thanks Comments .. I seldom get a second unless ( too loaded for witty comment).

  120. As much as I laughed at this…I wish it were real. Even though it’s awful. But hilarious.

  121. Paranoid Android-He most definitely does not have a pool. We decided to hand that over to Dan Fargis, my man my man.

  122. CommentsAtLarge

    @mass

    Most times my support for your comments come in the form of laughter upon reading them, this time it just needed to be in print.

  123. It seems as though even lamebook is attempting to get us all to go back to a simpler time…

    a time when a misguided med student could make a jackass out of himself to the delight of all…

    a time when mathematical proofs involved ben and herpes and frodo.

    and mom would bake fresh chocolate chip cookies…

    i miss those days.

    Q.E.D.

  124. It is difficult to tell who’s a guy and who’s a girl; but also unimportant.

  125. @BritishHobo- What makes you think I won’t be getting laid again? Yes, herpes is a drawback, but look at my grammar; impeccable.

  126. You just showed everybody why. Although I must admit, there are people out there that are lower than you on the evolutionary scale. I just pray that you don’t breed.

  127. Okay, in some places it is illegal to not tell your partners that you have HIV/AIDS. Pretty sure this doesn’t apply to all STDs though. It is illegal, however, to have sex with someone if they’re drunk and you’re sober.

  128. Hiijole_Chingada

    that stever/ben shit is as lame as it gets..and this is a repost

  129. Btw, this was all a long distance game of Truth or Dare between her and I. Have to keep things interesting somehow. lol. There are a lot more comments, but it was trimmed to at least look somewhat authentic, because it gets too off-the-wall and silly.

  130. you submitted your own stuff?

    -lame.

  131. Someone else submitted it. They asked my permission first.

  132. fair enough. although i do find people who are on facebook lame. here is where i come to laugh at them all.

    misha, you must be very proud. maybe you could do a skit for tv next…? let me know when it premieres!

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