Actually, it’s not “end up with [stitches]” I have a problem with so much as “your opinions are [as] about as valid as the last bitches” – what the hell is that supposed to be? Is that a line? Is that two lines? How does it scan? Does the first line end with ‘about’. That doesn’t work. That doesn’t exactly… er… fit the mood of the rest of the ‘piece’, does it?
YOUR oPINions ARE aBOUT as/
VAlid AS the LAST bitCHES ___ (blank. What goes there).
Maybe he’s a musical genius. Maybe it’s written in 5/4 or something weird. Seriously; can anyone produce a tune which will fit that line? And what’s with the additional ‘as’ anyway? He doesn’t need it for the metre. Who talks like that? Characters in an Oscar Wilde play. How much distance does the sentence need? ‘As about as’ is twee. ‘Bitches’ is not.
Maybe… maybe this is the next big thing. Maybe he’s reinventing music.
I’ve written a few songs in my time, and that just doesn’t work. I mean, it’d help if we had a tune, or even a vague idea of what genre he’s going for… it kinda works as post garage new wave industrial death hop… well… I say kinda works, I mean that “figuritively”
Mind yourself, Aleah. Watch your fucking mouth, bitch, or Nick will figuritively stich you up. (Not litterally, though, don’t worry – he doesn’t want to mess up his mum’s sewing room, where she lets him keep his computer as long as he cleans up the wadded tissues at the end of every, err, songwriting session).
I took it upon myself to record what I believe may have been Nick’s ultimate vision of the song he was in the process of recording, staying true to the post garage new wave industrial death hop genre that this lyrical work of art begs for.
No, I got that. But that won’t solve the odd number of syllables. ‘Bitches’ and ‘bitch’s’ are both bi-syllabic. As I said he could drop an ‘as’ but that still leaves him with 7 pairs which, as a prime number, is really hard to divide between two lines. So it ends up being one big 14-syllable line.
I mean… grammar aside he must have some kind of tune in mind, mustn’t he? He must have tried singing it when he thought up the lyrics. Grammatical errors I can accept but how can someone fuck up metre when their writing it to music? Maybe he’s tone deaf? Would that do it?
@T.L.: as-a yeah, that must be it. That line/two-and-a-half lines still sound(s) weird.
I didn’t want to take credit for Nick’s masterpiece, but Audacity didn’t allow me to put a composer so I just gave him the artist credit. That way BMI won’t have to split the royalty fees when it starts getting radio play.
Can anybody put me in touch with Nick please? I’m looking for someone to compose new original music for my wedding, and I think he really has this romance-&-lyrics thing down to a fine art. And I mean litterally, not figuritively.