Friday, June 18, 2010

All in the Family

previous post: Life’s Creations

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39 Comments

  1. Are we taking bets when Z’Narj first gets handcuffs placed on him?

  2. Holy shit the two pictures are just plain bad but the status ones are pretty fucking funny

  3. The GTA explanation was amazing.

  4. A Ghetto toddler! Awesome!

  5. Billy FTW!

  6. Who names their kid Zanori? And Billy is freaking me out with his Genomic Transformation Anthropomophism. WTF?

  7. Billy = brilliant explanation.

  8. Zanori, I’m rooting for you, buddy. Unfortunately, it looks like you’re going to have a couple of obstacles in life called “your parents”.

  9. I wonder why Grand Theft Auto is so bad to mention. It’s a rather boring explanation.

  10. Seriously, the Department of Child Services should just stroll through Facebook and Lamebook to see who their next cases will be.

    Pathetic parents are pathetic.

  11. Where the fuck do people come up with these names (Zanori,Jaidelyn,Shahin, Rhee)?

  12. So just to clarify the “trueee loveee” in the last one refers to the love between that dude and his beer, right?

  13. Insert Name Here

    @Sensible Madness: No, Sensible. You’re missing the whole picture here!

    It’s true love because he discovered he could use his girlfriend’s stomach as a table for his beer. I know I’d be in love with her if I could do that. Think about it, you don’t have to hold it in your hand anymore and it’s within reach. Brilliant.

  14. yourinevitabledemise

    Mos def, sensible. mos def.

    And sorry billy, every mom knows your ‘erm’ gives you away as a liar. I bet that one’s fake.

    WTF is ‘youts’? Everything about the first one confuses me.

  15. Billy is an asshole. He set up Lisa (who I’m assuming is his mother), then tried to look smart with his big words, one of which he misspelled (it’s anthropomoRphism) — along with his other misspelling (and typo). Dickhead.

  16. yourinevitabledemise

    @Insert What Where?

    Dag. I knew that was why my husband stayed after he knocked me up.

  17. yourinevitabledemise

    The fact that she said “aren’t u meant to be studying” makes me think not only does she not know the meaning of those words, she might not know how to pronounce them. Spelling may be a non-issue for her.

  18. Insert Name Here

    @yourinevitabledemise: Insert it here. Uhh, off topic!

    Yes, that’s probably why your husband stayed with you when you got knocked up. Didn’t you ever wonder all those times when he had his beer on your stomach? Didn’t you think that maybe you were being used as a table and that’s the only reason why he was there? Come on, woman! You’re smart! Figure it out!

  19. Sadly, due to using so many E’s, there wasn’t enough room for the last sentence: “And so he left me for her”

  20. krasivaya_devushka

    I feel bad for the kid in the first pic.

  21. Might I suggest that Joe also scratches his sonnet on the lid of a tin of Old Holborn or Golden Virginia? That way, when he offers his peers a roll-up, they can all wax philosophical on the theme of love.

  22. Heart breaker! xD Brilliant..

    I love Billy’s ‘erm’. He may aswell have thrown in a few shit…’s and a (fuck, I’m not good at lying…) for good measure.

    Oh, I thought the comments about beer were just a funny take on it, but now I look back, he is mighty pleased with that beer.

  23. @yourinevitabledemise

    Perhaps a misspelling of “youths,” (or simply a “My Cousin Vinny” reference) though that doesn’t make sense given the context.

  24. yourinevitabledemise

    @Insert daggers into my heart -

    You horrible, horrible man. The entire four years of our relationship… a complete sham, wow!

    (Please don’t kill me.)

  25. @24
    It was inevitable darlin’.

  26. In the first pic, I honestly think that borders on child abuse.

    Billy, you’re my hero.

  27. Insert Name Here

    @my.. yourinevitabledemise: Forgive me!

    For I have sinned, using your stomach as a place for my beer and only staying in our relationship for that one thing. But alas, it really did make a nice table.

  28. Pic #1: Perhaps I am a lame white Canadian, but what is the relevance/meaning of Z’narj?

    Pic #2: Who do you figure Joe beats when the baby kicks the beer of her tummy? Her or the fetus? (The optomist in me must assume it is his beer and not hers.)

  29. #1: I called Child Services. Hopefully they reach the poor bastard in time.

    #2 I’m pretty sure that second comment will get you 10 years in prison.

    #3: Billy is very good at taking advantage of people. Therefore he doesn’t need to study for he will be able to ride everybody else out while he is beating the hell out of hookers to steal back the money he just gave them.

    #4I love how he is pointing at the beer in this pic. Am I the only one unfortunate enough to notice this guy standing at half salute?

  30. Argh! I’d accept truuuuuuuue loooooooooooove (trooooooo larrrrrve even) if people want to elongate a word for emphasis but not trueeeeee loveeeeeee. Truey lovie? Think about your phonetics, people! I ask so little.

  31. kid in first pic is being set up to fail right off the bat…sad..and why anyone thinks that stupid shit is cool is beyond me

  32. yourinevitabledemise

    *bounces*
    He likes me for me,
    and because my stomach keeps it level,
    with the bump of our endeavor
    keeping your beer dear.
    what he sees…

    Uh, where am I?

  33. OMG that baby photo??!! Are you TRYING to set your child up for a future career as a drug dealer/pimp? Guess so, cuz it’s so “gangsta.”

    As for the last one, while I’m cringing at a)the cringe-worthy sappiness of the poem, and b)the odd juxtaposition of said poem with THAT picture…
    I’m grudgingly impressed that they managed to spell “pieces” correctly AND utilise the correct “their.”

  34. On an additional aside, does anyone else get as disturbed as I do when people try to portray their infant as some sort of sex symbol?

  35. bollywood_rocks83

    Shahin is a common Pakistani/Indian name. That is all.

  36. BritishHobo #22, I did a second look. Can’t believe I missed it too. She’s talking about love while he’s pointing at beer.

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  38. screw spammers

  39. Is it just me or does that kid look a little old for diapers?

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