Wednesday, March 24, 2010

A Match Made in Heaven

previous post: Background Checks

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44 Comments

  1. first!

  2. I seriously hope vancy is just a nickname.

  3. Jared’s isn’t funny…just very creepy…

  4. FTW JARED! some good ole mathamatics

  5. Wow, a Mrs. for McKenzie and a near Mrs. for Tasha.

  6. Brandy Alexander

    I read ‘Mrs.’ as M.R.S., like L.O.L. I’ve been on the internet too long.

  7. lol @ jared.
    aww, no one cares about tasha.

  8. Hey, that chick with the funny name might lose money on the flight she’s canceling. :(

    Plus, Tasha told them not to ask. Vancy was only paying attention to Tasha’s wishes.

  9. Brandy, I’m lovin your name.

  10. They shouldn’t need to ask what happened, it’s obvious: Tasha was engaged to Jared until she caught him banging underage bridesmaids at McKenzie’s wedding.

  11. why would you announce that your wedding was cancelled ON FACEBOOK??? oh and then expect people to not ask questions… classy tasha, very classy.

  12. Jared, epic fail. Still laughed though at the ridiculousness of it.

  13. I’m assuming the flight is to somewhere in America, in which case – HEY! HEY! I’LL TAKE IT. Unless it’s from somewhere in America, which would leave me fucked.

    Damn it, I need money.
    But more about weddings.

  14. fap fap fap fap fap fap underaged bridesmaides fap fap fap fap fap fap fap

  15. I heard masturbating.

  16. I hear it too, Hobo. Though for once it’s not near my ear. :D

  17. Dr. Azizted-Homicide

    ah jared. you’re probably a creep irl, but in text, in the context of lamebook, you are pretty rad, my friend.

  18. hee hee hee @ Lamebook posters. Youse guys make me chortle.

  19. so thats wat that sound is? i hear it in my dreams….. wat should it mean…

  20. @19

    If you hear that noise in your dreams, chances are you’ve been drugged by a family member and they are gratifying themselves to your near lifeless and probably naked body…

  21. Jared FTW!

  22. @BananaRepublic

    That is so hot.

  23. McKenzie. What a completely unsexy name

  24. @22

    I try to follow the common themes in these posts; i.e creepy dudes, masturbation, and the general commentary on the level of class in these submissions.

    When you string that into one post you generally end up with something tantamount to indecent sexual acts or debates about the US healthcare system.

    Just sayin’…

    Yours truly,

    BR – PhD Social Engineering.

  25. @mistaphill (with a sidelong glance @ BananaRepublic)

    Unsexy? McKenzie Phillips was banging her father for years, all the while living in a drug induced stupor. If that ain’t sexy, I don’t know what is. If she was the spokesperson for anal landmines, I’d buy one in every color.

  26. Jared is a winner. Tabitha, on the other hand, is a ridiculous person for asking for such personal information over status comments.

  27. I always shun anything that has underage connotations, I have a hate that burns bright for such things.

    But I gotta say, I think the Jared exchange is fucking funny.

    So snap on the bracelets and cart me away to the slammer if I’m bad for thinking that.

  28. Word, 11th grade is legal in many jurisdictions. Really, the only time it gets troublesome is when you have to make the choo-choo sound to get your cock in their mouth.

  29. Thank you Soup, I had a fucked day at work and you’ve just eased the pressure.

    You know it’s really hard these days to tell how old some of the young dudes are. They build them big and strong now, maybe it’s the hormones in the chicken or something, but I can’t work it out at times.
    I’m no Mary Kay ok, just not very good at guessing ages.

  30. Their bodies are all grown up, but their minds are still swimming with a combination of dolls, candy, and retard. It is indeed frustrating.

  31. Yes Soup, it’s when they open their mouths to say something, the age then becomes apparent.

  32. I try to stick to a general rule, I don’t know who made it up, but basically, I’m ok with anything around half my age plus 7.

  33. Wordpervert, a good general rule but more relating to sex than dating.

    When I met my partner I was under half his age, now we’ve been together for so many years that I’m over half his age + 7 ^-^;

  34. Yes Peach, the math changes as we get older.
    I’ve gone both sides of the age difference thing, and each side has something to offer.
    Spring lambs vs old mutton, you can make a good meal of either if you know how.

  35. @wordpervert

    I’m told that what ‘spring lambs’ lack in stamina and techinique is atoned for with rapid a rapid recharge time. I’m further told, ‘old mutton’ will take you to a nicer motel.

  36. Pfft…. If theres grass on the field play ball….

    if not, turn around and play in the mud.

  37. i said it before and i will say it again.

    Brides have something borrowed, something new, something old and something blue

    Brooms have the bridesmaids

    That’s a win win situation.

  38. haha uber typo , ment to say grooms

    Ah well , the brooms can serve the bridesmaids as well , i guess.

  39. As long as i am spamming , kudos to bananarepublic for making me laugh.

  40. Jared FTW

  41. lol

  42. Bwaaahahahahha @ Father Sha’s typo! Are they all gonna grow up to be witches??

    And btw……..I reckon Jared FTW……one of the few that made my jaded mind laugh.

  43. Well if Jared is also in 11th grade… although 11th grade is 15/16, so illegal anyway…
    Imagine if schools taught maths using real life scenarios like that…

  44. Jared… 15 yrs old and wrecking the “im getting married status” LOL funny stuff

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