Sunday, January 17, 2010

A Few Weekend Wins

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previous post: CATastrophe

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65 Comments

  1. First!!
    But 6th in line for greg’s girlfriend

  2. I don’t understand the last one

  3. Top one – Fucking win. Lol. (I sad “top one” insted “1st”) :) .

  4. If he’s so sick of her why the hell does he care who she fucks next?

  5. Fail. :)

  6. BlueBlue – you’re on the wrong site – you’re looking for FACEbook.

    however, i’ll be looking for your blurred out photo on these forums in the future, presumably in the douchebag section.

  7. Poor Rachel, herd that “stuff” stings like a bitch.

  8. Well, at least he still has his right hand, yes?

  9. the top one was a winner! the other 2….meh….

  10. “No cuts asshole” – Lulz!

  11. Greg’s status typo is the funniest part of this

  12. Lol, liking these :D

  13. oh BLueBlue you dont have a clue do you!?!
    poor thing probably never heard of a blow up doll have ya babe!
    And yes it does sting ;)

  14. How is that typo funnier that the comments? And yeah, if he can’t be with her then he should be glad she’s giving someone else shit. “No cuts asshole” is pretty funny, lol. I’d like to see the girlfriend’s reaction to this one, was expecting it when she was mentioned.

  15. Yeah, I don’t understand why other people liking my girlfriend would have to do with ME liking my girlfriend… but either way, effing hilarious.

  16. matthew for the win ! haha definietly

  17. This makes me extremely ANGRY at women, seeing as how Hitting Women was deleted. I hate women! Women shouldn’t be working for Facebook, but everyone knows that it was definitely removed by a FEMALE facebook employee! AIDFHSOUFHAS WOMEN!

  18. Beanstalker, what the hell are you talking about?

  19. We voted at last week’s meeting, Beanstalker. Women hate you too.

  20. This beanstalker clown is a real putz.

    I also don’t get why he would care who fucks his girlfriend if he breaks up with her.

    The best part of this is BlueBlue…what are you? Eight?

  21. @ Mol (19) = You forgot to tell Beanstalker that we also voted him “the world’s biggest douche who only hates women because his mother didn’t stop his father from molesting him when he was eight and now he’s so fucked up he can’t get any cunni, even when he pays for it”

    Congratulations Beanstalker! If you’ll just give us your address, we’ll deliver your grand prize of a pretty trophy and castration with a blunt knife.

  22. lol, didn’t even notice Greg’s typo. Whose girlfriend do you reckon he’s doing?

  23. I honestly thought he meant blow up, as in with explosives.

  24. Am I missing something? Did BlueBlue say something that you’re all commenting on and his post was deleted? All I see from him is that he doesn’t get the third one.

    The first is nice, the last two are not very funny. They remind me of someone hearing the word “hole” and immediately yelling “that’s what she said” and thinking their original and insanely funny. You’re not. If it’s not a clever situation, then you’re just being lame and overused.

  25. Hmm, yeah I was thick, I thought the same as nim. Or maybe I just forgot to think. Abuse is totally justified

  26. “no cuts asshole” lmao, greg has some good friends

  27. @beanstalker. Good luck getting laid sweetheart. Enjoy the hand you’ve got, I think that all you’ll find comfort in.

  28. shit. *that’s

  29. Speaking of castration with a blunt knife, did anyone see that news article about the dude who fondled his drunk mate, got pissed off when it wasn’t reciprocated so he ripped his mate’s balls off??

    Beanstalker should send him a friend request and save us the hassle of the castration.

  30. I think Beanstalker’s comment was just made to elicit a reaction.

  31. If Greg’s girlfriend is such a pain in the arse, why do all of his mates want to fuck her? *slaps forehead* Oh, right, sorry, thinking like a woman again.

    Carry on…

  32. @Natalie88 You’re going to need a pretty large trophy to fit all of that on. Or an acronym. Though TWBDWOHWBHMDSHFFMHWHWEANHSFUHCGACEWHPFI isn’t that great either.

  33. @sideways

    Having sex is not enjoyable for men… at all. It’s only about the dominance. Not many people know this, but sex HURTS men. It feels like pins and needles running up and down the length of the penis. We only do it because… well, it’s all we’ve got. We’re not dominant in the workforce anymore and we’re losing our foothold in politics. Therefore, we need to find any/every excuse to dominate sexually… simply by having sex (usually being on top).

    Therefore, the bigger the pain in the arse/bitch/evil woman you are, the more we want to have sex with you, dominating you and (in our minds) making sure that you know that your evil ways don’t make you invulnerable, no matter how much pain it takes to accomplish this.

    The.More.You.Know!

  34. @ mcowles. you’re not doing it right.

  35. What was the count up to? Seven, eight?

  36. @mcowles – you must be a woman.

  37. worst_episode_ever

    hahahaha yeah the first one was great… the other two not so much

  38. @belle83773 – I’m ALL man. Well, 95% man………. don’t ask.

    @sosr – Could you draw me some diagrams using stick figures to show me the error of my ‘lays’?

  39. @mcowles – no, but i’m pretty good with 2 biros.

  40. @sosr – isn’t that Spanish for donkeys?

  41. @mcowles. no, that’s burros. i’m talking about pens of the ball-point variety. i once used 3 to demonstrate to a colleague the various positions available in an ffm threesome.

  42. Dear Lord, what happen to this conversation? I guess I can kind of understand mcowles contempt for woman after reading his poop post in the other thread lol but HEY calm down.. we are not all the same! I promise I’ll never poop on your hand ;-)

  43. @mcowles – You sure you don’t have some kind of neuropathy? Pins and needles on your penis is NOT how sex is supposed to feel…or were you satirizing the old argument that women don’t enjoy sex? Dammit, sarcasm on the Internet is hard.

  44. @misanthropic4u

    I think I just fell in love. “I promise I’ll never poop on your hand ;)

    The only thing stopping me from flying to Portland, Oregon to swoop you off of your feet is that you already have your wedding vows written (see above) and that’s too much pressure for me to have to live up to that.

    @Adel

    Hmmm, if sex is supposed to be fun, then why do my neighbors scream “oh god” so much, while doing it? I scream that also, during sex and then cry and hold ice to my penis afterwards. I always assumed that that’s what everyone else did?

    @sosr

    2 donkeys or 2 ball-point pens… bring it on. Any help would be appreciated!

  45. @mcowles – lube up brother. simple as.

    3 types of orgasm:
    the positive orgasm – ‘oh yes, oh yes, OH YESSS!’
    the negative orgasm – ‘oh no, oh no, OH NOOO!’
    the spiritual orgasm – ‘oh god, ohh god, OH GODDD!’
    the fake orgasm – ‘oh heff, oh heff, OH HEFFF!’

  46. @ mcowles, i think you may be entitled to a secondary income, call your local government provider and see if you can receive any benefits for being pronounced legally retarded.

  47. @mcowles -I’m going to have to agree with sosr on this one. The only way I can imagine sex feeling the way you described it is if A. You are having sex with someone who has been dead for a decade and thus, dried up. or B. You are having sex with someone who has recently had sex with a cactus. Either way, you really need to find somewhere else to stick it.

  48. @sosr your comment made me lol

  49. @mcowles, ya know how when you feel a woman’s breast and it feels like a…. like a bag of sand…..

  50. @Adamn

    I would laugh at your 40-year old virgin reference, but you called me legally retarded, or at least that’s how you pronounced my name… or something.

    @sosr

    You purposely put “3 types of orgasms” and then wrote out 4 types, right?

    To the rest of you… fine, I’ll start poking women that are 1) alive, 2) haven’t had sex with a cactus, 3) don’t have vaginal teeth, and 4) smell like vanilla.

    I’ll keep everyone updated as to the (hopefully) new sensations that I will experience.

  51. @mcowles -go get ‘em tiger… heh heh woods…

  52. @Mcowles it’s ok if you don’t understand, just call your parent/guardian/wet nurse and they can assist you with the aforementioned

  53. @Mnic Very original material

  54. @Adamn

    I wish I still had a wet nurse… those were the best 12 years of my life!

  55. insert clever name here

    @mcowles I’ve never had sex with a cactus and my vagina smells like shampoo. Some Pantene attacked it earlier today …well that’s what it looked like anyway.

  56. @Adamn -Your support system is loving, reassuring, and always there for you, …but sooner or later its bound to run out of donuts.

  57. @insert clever name here -… I’m a little confused at your comment. Are you offering for mcowles to explore your dungeon? That’s what it seems like…

    @Mcowles -If she says yes, RUN! Vaginas do not normally spew shampoo out of them.

  58. insert clever name here

    @MNic Sure they do. Greg’s girlfriend’s did after he broke up with her… well, it did after Micah, Jack, Andrew, Trevor, Jose and Charles. (Jose cut in front of Charles)

  59. @insert clever name here

    If you’re using a pantene bottle to “assist” you in times of need, then you need to make sure that the cap remains closed. You’re just asking for a UTI or Yeast Infection.

    That being said, I will have to think about your offer of your vagina to me. I’m assuming you’re doing so in the attempt to show me that not all sex has to feel like puppy murder (which isn’t good). I’ll get back to you.

  60. @ mcowles. yes, the 4th type is fake, so is not an orgasm. i wonder if heff has ever genuinely made a woman scream that wasn’t from the ptc.

  61. hey Greg may be you should consider working as a pimp for your gf i’m sure you gonna be a very rich man …:)

  62. Maybe Greg doesn’t want to break up with her, but he’s pissed off because so many guys want to sleep with her.

  63. Lillith my Alter Ego

    Not as long as line for guys who already fucked your girlfriend that would of been a good one.

  64. To greg: I just registered to let you all know that it was NOT me… Although I was it was.

  65. WISH* Sh!t

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