How is that typo funnier that the comments? And yeah, if he can’t be with her then he should be glad she’s giving someone else shit. “No cuts asshole” is pretty funny, lol. I’d like to see the girlfriend’s reaction to this one, was expecting it when she was mentioned.
This makes me extremely ANGRY at women, seeing as how Hitting Women was deleted. I hate women! Women shouldn’t be working for Facebook, but everyone knows that it was definitely removed by a FEMALE facebook employee! AIDFHSOUFHAS WOMEN!
@ Mol (19) = You forgot to tell Beanstalker that we also voted him “the world’s biggest douche who only hates women because his mother didn’t stop his father from molesting him when he was eight and now he’s so fucked up he can’t get any cunni, even when he pays for it”
Congratulations Beanstalker! If you’ll just give us your address, we’ll deliver your grand prize of a pretty trophy and castration with a blunt knife.
Am I missing something? Did BlueBlue say something that you’re all commenting on and his post was deleted? All I see from him is that he doesn’t get the third one.
The first is nice, the last two are not very funny. They remind me of someone hearing the word “hole” and immediately yelling “that’s what she said” and thinking their original and insanely funny. You’re not. If it’s not a clever situation, then you’re just being lame and overused.
Having sex is not enjoyable for men… at all. It’s only about the dominance. Not many people know this, but sex HURTS men. It feels like pins and needles running up and down the length of the penis. We only do it because… well, it’s all we’ve got. We’re not dominant in the workforce anymore and we’re losing our foothold in politics. Therefore, we need to find any/every excuse to dominate sexually… simply by having sex (usually being on top).
Therefore, the bigger the pain in the arse/bitch/evil woman you are, the more we want to have sex with you, dominating you and (in our minds) making sure that you know that your evil ways don’t make you invulnerable, no matter how much pain it takes to accomplish this.
Dear Lord, what happen to this conversation? I guess I can kind of understand mcowles contempt for woman after reading his poop post in the other thread lol but HEY calm down.. we are not all the same! I promise I’ll never poop on your hand
@mcowles – You sure you don’t have some kind of neuropathy? Pins and needles on your penis is NOT how sex is supposed to feel…or were you satirizing the old argument that women don’t enjoy sex? Dammit, sarcasm on the Internet is hard.
I think I just fell in love. “I promise I’ll never poop on your hand ”
The only thing stopping me from flying to Portland, Oregon to swoop you off of your feet is that you already have your wedding vows written (see above) and that’s too much pressure for me to have to live up to that.
Hmmm, if sex is supposed to be fun, then why do my neighbors scream “oh god” so much, while doing it? I scream that also, during sex and then cry and hold ice to my penis afterwards. I always assumed that that’s what everyone else did?
2 donkeys or 2 ball-point pens… bring it on. Any help would be appreciated!
@mcowles -I’m going to have to agree with sosr on this one. The only way I can imagine sex feeling the way you described it is if A. You are having sex with someone who has been dead for a decade and thus, dried up. or B. You are having sex with someone who has recently had sex with a cactus. Either way, you really need to find somewhere else to stick it.
If you’re using a pantene bottle to “assist” you in times of need, then you need to make sure that the cap remains closed. You’re just asking for a UTI or Yeast Infection.
That being said, I will have to think about your offer of your vagina to me. I’m assuming you’re doing so in the attempt to show me that not all sex has to feel like puppy murder (which isn’t good). I’ll get back to you.