Monday, September 6, 2010

A Few PhoDOHs

previous post: Week Starting Wins

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80 Comments

  1. Paint_my_nails_please

    What poop picture?

  2. Hey guess what? If you don’t like your shitty job as a server, put down the joint/playstation remote/poker cards etc…, get an education and then get a real job. Don’t complain because your compensation is commensurate with your skill set. Matter of fact, just be thankful that you have a job, I’m sure there is someone in the unemployed 10% of the US population that would love to take over for you.

    By the fuck, do we have to get started on the whole “It’s a medical condition / thyroid problem.” again? The only thing that is beyond most of these people’s control is the ability to stop funneling cheap processed food product down that gaping maw.

  3. How did squidquopro not get that the bad guy in that story was the redneck?

    The whole tipping argument just reminds me of a story Karl Pilkington tells i nhs diary and on Ricky Gervais’ old radio show about how him and his girlfriend had hardly any money on their trip to America and so tipped just a few cents after a meal out. They got to the door, and the waiter caught up with them, and gave it them back because it wasn’t enough.

    Not that I care or anything, I love America.

  4. i think the problem is the american minimum wage, not the amount people tip. it was found recently that at some restaurants in the UK, tips were used to punt the wage up to the minimum level; or that waiters were paid minimum wage and all tips were thrown into the restaurants’ coffers. the former practice has been outlawed, and the latter has been widely discouraged – most restaurants now have stickers in the window saying something along the lines of ‘all tips go to staff.’

    $1.25 an hour? is it a third world country? that’s really shameful.

    i always tip at least 10% unless the service is shoddy – i even did this when i was a poor student on principle; it’s just the sense of being obliged to tip that i find somehow distasteful. i want people to be able to rely on my good graces.

  5. Hey phuntyme, chill out. For your information its the only way some people have to pay for school (one of my 3 jobs to pay for my education). How the f**K else do you think some people pay for school? Not everyone gets handouts from mommy and daddy…grab a clue.

    Quit making ignorant, asinine statements about things you know nothing about. I am sure that you have absolutely loved every job you have ever had, right?

  6. On the obesity thing, I agree with phuntyme, although in not quite so crude a vernacular. Yes it’s true that there is a percentage of the obese population that is in their physical condition because of forces outside of their control. But do you really expect me to believe that the outbreak of obesity as a medical epidemic is because of some kind of widespread genetic issue that randomly popped up within the last few decades, or because our status quo is increasingly sedentary lifestyles and the access of cheap, processed, calorie ridden foods? I’m not saying that the portion of the obese population that are so because of their genetics or medications are negligible, I’m saying it’s extremely unlikely on any given day to see a fat person who’s fat because they have shitty genes, rather than because they’re lazy and piggish.
    Yes it’s hard to lose weight, but that’s exactly the point. People are too lazy to do the damned work because our entire society is based on making things physically easier. Look at the segue for fuck’s sake! What a stupid invention! Get off of it and walk, you lazy fuck!
    I happen to believe that making excuses for obesity is making the epidemic worse because we’re enabling people to be fat, lazy pigs. Stop encouraging people to eat themselves into an early death.
    In closing, fat broad needs to stop eating at McDonalds and get off of her damned Rascal. Which she probably got for free. Thanks HMO!

  7. @Shellzy – I think I love you.

  8. @55…you don’t know my life or what I had to go through to get here. If you truly are working three jobs to help pay for an education, then I’m not sure why you would take offense to my comment. Clearly my comment was directed at the ones who have no desire to better themselves. I understand venting, but if someone is not doing something to actively change their life, then they have no right to complain. There I go again making statements I know nothing about.

    FWIW, I actually left college after I got my AA because I found a job that I loved and does not require a degree. This job is straight commission, no hourly, no salary, no bonus. I could be at work for 12 hours, if I don’t sell something then I make nothing. You better believe I love my job, no way I could work a 12 hr day for free if I didn’t.

  9. #3 will be featured on “people of walmart” shortly

  10. All right, my goat’s officially been gotten.

    @phuntyme, whatever you may say (now that you’ve been called out and had a chance to think about it) regarding people with shitty jobs, you made some VERY strong remarks up there generalizing that anyone with a job they dislike is lazy and shouldn’t complain when they don’t get paid for the work they do. It was not in the least bit clear who you were singling out. I’d advise being more clear in the future.

    I am also sensing a great deal of hostility towards serving people here. The fact is most people have to work crappy jobs with few requirements in order to even be considered for higher, better paying positions, and while they’re racking up references it would be nice to be able to afford shelter and food. Serving jobs in particular are tricky because they are paid lower than minimum wage, which is minimum wage for a reason: it’s the minimum amount the government believes someone who does ANY kind of work for a living should be paid. This amount usually isn’t enough to support oneself, particularly in a healthy manner (see below). Servers depend on tips to make just that paltry, minimum amount. And you might think you have a sixth sense for it, but except in outstanding cases it’s pretty hard to tell the difference between a snobby brat who has to work some kind of job or mommy will take away their toys and a young person who is trying to get a degree without starving, or an unmotivated middle-aged layabout and an adult who’s been disadvantaged by an impoverished upbringing, a disability, an unforeseen tragedy, or even committing that greatest of all sins, being foreign!

    People won’t stop eating crappy food until there are affordable alternatives. Don’t tell me there are–I work in the grocery business and I know the difference in price between an apple and a bag of potato chips, between McDonald’s and a plate of steamed veggies. Then there is the matter of exercise. Plenty of people have conditions or situations that, while they don’t directly increase body fat, prevent regular exercise. It’s not just medical issues that are to blame, either; working three jobs while going to school, for instance, is a pretty good reason to not have time to jump around for half an hour every day (lack of time also makes it quite hard to cook nourishing meals). In cramped apartments and bad neighborhoods it’s hard to find a safe way to exercise. Even if an individual can in theory afford to live healthily by the book, maybe they want to spend the money on this “college” thing you people keep demanding folks go to, or maybe they put the time into a desk job they love and that pays well. Or maybe they really are lazy! Guess what: It’s none of your business and it concerns no one but themselves. If you can’t deal with people EXISTING at you, and maybe, just maybe! having a personal lifestyle you disapprove of, perhaps you should move to Antarctica or another similarly uninhabited place, because wherever there are people there will be people who might eat cheeseburgers a little more than they should, or maybe they just have bad knees. There are so many ways a person can wind up at a particular body size that if you speculate you will inevitably be wrong. And assuming that it’s because they are morally inferior to you makes you a fantastic douchenozzle.

    @thebza, since, as you have proclaimed, you are not psychic, I am curious to know how you discovered what proportion of fat wheelchair-users are lazy as opposed to disabled. You’ll have to tell me about your study sometime.

  11. sweet geezuz @azira, no one cares. Get a life already.

  12. awe, that last one makes me sad.

  13. @azira, in my book, even one lazy fucker in a mobility aid – using it as a choice, not a last resort – is pretty sickening. I say this due to the fact that after a pretty severe car accident, my brother is permanantly in one. Don’t you think every person making the choice not to use their gift of perfectly able legs is a slap in the face of all those who ARE disabled? I think you’ll notice I mentioned once or twice that I was talking about a distinct group of people. Please don’t be a smartass. And for the record, your smug ‘I don’t judge anyone ever, never have, never will’ act doesn’t wash.

    So thanks, but I’ll keep my study to myself, as you mentioned – it’s none of your business.

  14. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. Whether or not someone is overweight is no one’s business but theirs. Whether or not someone’s hair is blond or brown or green is no one’s business but theirs. Whether or not someone is christian or buddhist or muslim is no one’s business but theirs. Making a lifestyle choice that some people somewhere don’t approve of is not criminal, nor is it socially unacceptable. You cannot dictate what I do with my life, nor can I dictate what you do with yours.

    Lamebook isn’t posting pictures of a person just standing there smoking a cigarette, is it? There are no pictures of people minding their own business in church, praying, either. Why not?

  15. Why is it that as a society we have somehow decided that being cruel to overweight people is ok? It’s none of anyone else’s fucking business if someone is overweight. Who cares if it’s because of an illness, or just because they choose to be. And don’t give me any of that “it increases the costs of healthcare” BS. So does sleeping around and increasing your chances of getting STDs, riding in a car and risking being in a traffic accident, or any other number of behaviors. The fact is that it isn’t any of your business.

  16. That’s the great thing about generalizing, I wasn’t directing that comment at any one person. Obviously I struck a nerve with you, to which category do you belong, unmotivated malcontent, or fat, or both?

    No hostility against servers from me, I understand it can be a thank-less, difficult job with crappy pay. This is why I chose not to do it. If you choose to be a server, great for you. Be the best server you can be, do that job to the best of your ability and you’ll hear no complaints from me.

    Here is where the hostility comes in. It’s a choice, no one forced you to be a server, you made that decision of your own free will fully knowing the pay plan when you went in. It angers me when people want to get paid above their agreed pay scale. The sense of entitlement that you DESERVE a tip for bringing me my food is ridiculous. Do you deserve a tip if you do a bad job? Nope! If I do poorly at my job, there is no tip. No sale means no commission. Do I complain about it? Nope, I knew what I was getting into when I signed on. What’s the definition of insanity? Doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. If all you do is go to the same dead end job everyday and never do anything to improve yourself, why should you complain when you get paid exactly the way you chose to get paid? I didn’t say you had to go to college, I said to get an education.

    Entitlement is what is wrong with America. Everywhere I look I see people who want the good life but are not willing to put in the labor required to get there. A free ride, a handout is all everyone is looking for. Half Million dollar house, can’t pay the bills, can’t live up to the contract you agreed to, you deserve a handout. Credit card bills out the ass, you don’t really have to pay that debt, just file bankruptcy.

    Sorry, tangent. Bottom line, if you don’t like your job, for whatever reason, it’s on you to change it. No one else is going to do it for you.

    As far as being fat goes, you have proven my point exactly. Yes, you can buy a bag of chips for less than an apple. The nutritional content of the apple far exceeds that of the bag of chips, therefore, you get more value from the apple. Education shows you this. No time, space for exercise excuse is very lame. No one says you have to have a pricey gym membership to exercise. You have to want it to make it happen, park a little farther from work and walk in, use your heavy bookbag as a weight training aid, there are plenty of ways to burn extra calories if you just look for them. You got to want it.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5fsm-QbN9r8

    As far as these people existing and annoying me while they do their thing, as they go about their life “concerning no one but themselves”, I say bullshit. It does concern me, these people taking up my space, breathing my air, an obstacle to my desire to wring every last bit of enjoyment out of this short gift called life.

    Plus, those fat pigs are really driving up the cost of my medical insurance.

  17. @ thequeen and @ kate, I’ll combine you because together you help me make my point.

    When you buy a pack of cigarettes, part of the taxes you pay goes to help defray the healthcare costs of smokers. As a smoker, you pay higher medical premiums because of the increased risk of health complications. Smokers have accepted these costs.

    You want to be fat, fine, institute a fat tax. If your bmi exceeds a healthy level, you are required to pay higher health care premiums and when you go to the grocery store you get taxed on high calorie unhealthy foods. Buy veggies and healthy lean cuts of meat, no tax. Now, be fat all you want, you just have to pay for it, not me.

  18. @phuntyme

    “You got to want it.”
    All grammatical errors aside, what if the people don’t want it? What if they are perfectly happy with their lives just the way they are? You are the one who wants it, not them.

    I am also going to say bullshit. Someone being fat on the other side of the country who you will never meet in your entire lifetime does not affect you in any way. They are not “taking up your space” and they are not “breathing your air.” They are not inhibiting your ability to enjoy your life, you are simply looking for reasons to hate them.

    kate_mcguire already said what I was going to say about the medical insurance bullshit, so I’ll leave you to read that at your leisure.

    A “fat tax” is possibly the most absurd, ignorant, and prejudicial thing I have ever heard of in my entire life. You actually want people to have to pay for looking different from what you deem acceptable? Again, not all overweight people are overweight by choice, so your fat tax would not be fair to those who can’t help it. Suppose this fat tax was put in place, and all overweight people did pay higher medical premiums, just as smokers do. Would the internet stop mocking them? Would they be allowed to live their lives in peace? I think not. The world would find another reason to hate them. The world does not hate overweight people because they think that they make their medical insurance cost more. People hate overweight people because they look different.

    You can’t tax people for not living their lives the way you do. Is there a druggie tax? Is there a promiscuous tax? Is there an alcoholic tax?

    The only pig here is you. You are arrogant, hateful, and disturbed. Overweight people are not hurting you, so take your self-righteous entitlement back to the KKK where people like you came from, or learn some respect and common decency toward your fellow man.

  19. Arrogant, not really, just proud of the things I’ve been able to accomplish in my life. Hateful, only if you wrong me. Disturbed, quite possibly, waiting on the test results.

    How is a fat tax prejudicial? More prejudicial than a tax on cigarettes, alcohol, gasoline? Those are taxes that are imposed because it has been shown that those things have detrimental effects on health and environment. You don’t like paying taxes on smokes, then don’t smoke. You don’t like paying taxes on gasoline, then don’t drive. You don’t like paying taxes on fatty foods, don’t buy them. They (government) can put a tax on just about anything they like. Back in 2003, they tried to pass a tax on coffee drinks that contain more than 1.5 oz of espresso, fortunately Seattle voters were wise enough to vote that down. I can promise you that right now there is a politician trying to work out a tax on fatty foods and sodas. Problem is that everyone would be required to pay it. Why should I have to pay extra money to buy a coke and a twinkie when I am in good physical condition?

    Happy with their lives, eh? How about when a fat person tries to get on an airplane and they are forced to buy a separate seat for each ass cheek? Or worse yet, they convince the airline not to charge them for an extra seat only to have to wedge themselves in the seat next to me and forcing their blubber gut to spill over the armrest into my lap. You’re telling me I shouldn’t be bothered by that because “they can’t help it” or “they are happy that way”.

    No one is ever going to stop mocking people because they are different, color, size, age, sexual preference.

  20. Hate is caused by the hater, not the hated. And if you’r going to be so high and mighty about your physical condition, then why would you be eating a twinkie and drinking coke?

    I don’t care if the government decides to tax certain foods; I have a problem with your fat tax, the one where they would tax people with a bmi above a healthy level. THAT is prejudice, because not everyone with an unhealthy bmi is necessarily eating mcdonalds every day. You either want to tax people with unhealthy lifestyles, or you want to tax overweight people. One is prejudiced, and one is not. What about those with bmis that are lower than healthy? You want an anorexic tax too?

    As for taking up your space, what about extraordinarily tall people? What about body builders? Pregnant women? These people take up more of your precious space. Do you hate them too? Do you want to tax them too?

  21. @azira and @thequeen, thank you.

  22. nothingsuitsmelikeasuit

    Aren’t we all getting a little self righteous here? Everyone is entitled to an opinion, freedom of speech, etc. Why on God’s green Earth are we now delving into the personal life of this woman we don’t know?

    Sure, she may be disabled…she may also be lazy.
    Sure, she may have disadvantaged genes…she may also eat too much.

    Hell, it may just be an unflattering angle 😛 Basically what I’m saying is who am I to judge on her situation? Actually…who are you to judge?

    Do you all want some bread for your high horses?

  23. who feeds their horse bread?

  24. I call for a feeding your horse bread tax!

  25. That tax would only apply if your horse had a cock shaped marking on it.

  26. And if the horse had a bmi above a healthy level.

  27. And once again, thequeen wins the argument with her superior logic and tolerance.

    I love it when everyone I debate with just pulls out of the race once they realize I’m right.

  28. Click Me thequeen

  29. http://www.lostaddress.org/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/ArguingInternetSpecialOlympics1.jpg

    hopefully it works the second time

  30. I’m not clicking anything. I’d like to protect my computer from viruses. You’re not responding to any arguments I made, therefore, I win, because you ran out of things to say.

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