Archive for October, 2009
When I was in high school we didn’t have social networking sites like Facebook. And every day I thank God for that because if I had had access to everyone’s personal shit and a public profile of my own while those hormones were surging through my body, it wouldn’t have been pretty. So no, I wasn’t on Facebook in high school, but I WAS aware enough to know what was considered “cool” and “not cool.” Here are a few examples.
Getting caught spray painting your girlfriend’s name on the side of the school: Cool. Getting caught with a backpack full of inhalers and acne cream: Not Cool.
Rigging your locker to immediately open when you smash your fist into it like the Fonz: Cool. Accidentally shitting your pants while holding your head back to dump the remaining Cheetos crumbs out of the bag and into your mouth: Not Cool.
Letting a girl sit shotgun during one of your drag races and having a sign at the finish line that asks the girl to homecoming: Cool. Arranging digital crops (wtf?) from some lame-ass online video game and taking a screen shot of it to ask a girl to homecoming: Not cool.