Friday, July 9, 2010

Wins for the Weekend

previous post: Troubling Times



  1. :) first?

  2. hahah Denise is such an idiot

  3. Nick, I lol’d and Geez… Denise is a retard.

  4. Dillon is right. They are both going to Florida. sad but true.

    They’re both going to Florida and no one can stop either

  6. Big_Fuckin_Cock_All_Day

    Obviously LeBron is not the VP, but the Speaker of the House. Cmon people, keep up with CNN geez.

  7. Even as a resident of Ohio, I find the thing about the oil spill / LeBron pretty funny.
    The first thing on here though is so old though.

  8. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    Christina needs to learn that BEER is the breakfast of champions.

  9. Christina….”Eating is cheating”…should’ve left out the cereal THEN its the breakfast of champions! :P

  10. laugh.out.loud

    These were funny. The first one was old though.

  11. My ignorance thinks this post is not funny. Perhaps if I knew more stuff I would have laughed.

  12. I live in Cleveland and my heart hurts right now

  13. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    Where the hell is everyone?

    @ Hobo it’s mostly basketball. It’s not HAHA funny, especially not to people from Cleveland.

  14. Why is Cleveland upset again? This dude who used to bounce a ball around in Cleveland is going to bounce a ball around in another city? Oh, okay.

  15. nick obviously submitted his own…. lame.

  16. BH there was an oil spill in the gulf of mexico for a month or two involving BP that has not been able to be fixed. Our government and BP are both being criticized because the ecosystem is being ruined due to all the oil leaking into the water.
    also Lebron James a basketball player (arguably the best in the league) for the cleveland cavs became a free agent and left to go to miami, fl in a humiliating and narcissistic press conference last night…
    hence the joke the oil and lebron james are both going to florida

  17. @ yo momma…thanks. I too was a bit confused like my friend hobo. But I think it was just because I couldn’t hear the basketball news over the roar of the world cup and those damn vuvuzuelas :-)

  18. Nick = Fail

  19. Thanks Dillon, I needed the reminder like a hole in the head.

  20. really? All I hear is the loud sobbing of several million northeast ohioans, strange!
    Maybe I should consider being like rest of the world and watch soccer. At least then I wouldn’t feel like my boyfriend just took me on national television and broke up with me…

  21. Such a shame..i don’t wanna miss how holland is gonna win ;)

  22. Is this like some major Floridian tragedy? Should I watch my words when I go over there next week?

  23. i have a question. what is this thing about the one-armed girl?
    i’ve been reading posts forever, but i have no idea what it’s about. if it’s not too much trouble, would someone explain?

  24. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    Florida is really a whole state of beaches so it would be a bad thing. Let’s say you stick your dick on top of a (big?)bowl of water, that is what Florida looks like. That should visually explain why there are lots of beaches in Florida.

  25. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    @ Jaz it’s hard to explain without getting your comment in moderation. Let’s just say someone was posted here and she saw it and came on here and caused some shit. So now you can barely say her name without getting into moderation and all the posts were deleted. I can’t even find any copies saved online.

  26. SouthBeachTakeover

    As a Cleveland native, the LeBron incident really hurts me. He betrayed our whole city. I have never wanted a team (the Heat) to be so embarrassed so badly. The last seven years have been nothing but broken dreams, and the curse will no doubt follow him to Miami.

  27. Now Christina has the right idea. With enough Smirnoff, you don’t need to care about things like baseball, supposedly transsexual pop stars and how blind people get through life.

  28. Krazy Eyez Killa

    It has been established that cunnilungus is the breakfast of champions, I’ve even said it on here before. 69′er is the breakfast of doubles champions.

  29. SouthBeachTakeover

    @yo momma we should go and burn down the witness poster.

  30. Did she really only have one arm and did it take her twice as long to respond to stuff?

  31. @ mass: Only when she was eating.

    Speaking of one armed girls, I found out there is a one armed stripper at PT’s in Centerville. Believe it or not, she is smokin hot too! She asked to be called Nubby. Says everyoone calls her that, no joke. She claims that she can pole dance but they didn’t have a pole there for me to see. Hell of a first trip to a strip club.

    I think they are blowing the whole BP thing up. Just hear me out before anybody gets offended. The only reason I say this is because back in the 90′s, there was one twicw as bad on the Pacific side of Mexico. Same situation as with this one. Just didn;t make worldwide news.

  32. Random note:

    I’ve had the privilege of conversing with word outside of the Lamebook forums. She wants to thank you for all your comments to the lb team on her behalf. They have contacted her and THEY want her back! She’ll be back on when lb contacts her and the problem is corrected.

  33. woo!

    love you word!

  34. Yeah ee, Apparently she has a pretty big fan base. Love ya word! ;)

  35. By the way, Hope you had a good birthday ee!

  36. SouthBeach im still in the nauseous stage which is between shock and anger…I’ll be there soon just give me time

  37. HeSaid, it was a good birthday, thank you!

    Right you are! She has a huge fan base!

  38. Word up everybody says
    When you hear the call you’ve got to get it underway
    Word up it’s the code word
    No matter where you say it you know that you’ll be heard..

    Sorry, loved the little red cup Cameo wore in this video though .. miss word.

  39. Wait, I just realized, why the hell would it be a Floridian tragedy? Ah, forget it.

    Awesome news about word, nice that Lamebook ‘emselves asked her back. Guess they do take notice of what we say then. I just hope this imitator knobhead’s gone.

  40. Florida is a nice state .. drunk and high is nicer though.

  41. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    Interesting comment ee.

  42. Aww, I live in FL. My poor state, but mass…we do the drunk and high thing just with a little more sunshine. ;)

  43. Dukey, I’m just passing the news. She wanted to give her thanks, but won’t come back on till the problem is rectified. Can’t say I blame her. This is a little escape for some of us, we want to come on and not get ‘stolen’ per say.

  44. Dukey Smoothy Buns

    No problem ee, I was hijacked by our Mega troll too and (S)He used me to claim that I hated Hobo and a few others.

    No problem though, I will just have one of those imaginary Stella Artois that word handed me while I wait for her return. Also, happy birthday ee, I guess I missed your birthday annoucement.

  45. eenerbl #41.

    As a kid I vacationed in Sarasota … 30 yrs ago. Never thought Pee Wee Herman would get busted there years later for punching the clown in a movie theater.

  46. SouthBeachTakeover

    @yo momma Well, I imagine they are taking it down soon so no time is better then the present. Just get your pitchforks and torches

  47. Who’s justin bieber?

  48. Where is Kanye West to announce “Lebron James does not care about Clevelanders” when you need him

  49. and sorry ee, I’m rude! Happy Birthday

  50. All’s good yo, it was the 4th. Most of you celebrated my birth, you just didn’t know it!

  51. LOL mass, us Floridians know how to have a good time. I’m having one now, I’m sneaking on the computer though, shhh. You didn’t know I was here! I’d get in trouble for not being part of the festivities.

  52. So I realized some Clevelanders here are saying how bad this LeBron thing is.
    I agree.
    What he did, was betrayal. I aswell, am upset even though I’m not even a huge basketball fan.
    But what can we do? Sit and cry?
    Everyone needs to just now get over it, get motivated, & when the Cleveland & Miami game comes, we beat their asses. K motivational speech over.
    That last thing about the oil spill is still funny.

  53. Dizzy_Ballerina

    BritishHobo i need some man/boy advise it’s either you and McCowles or Soup and McCowles or you and Soup but I need help with this boy before I kill (or kick h’em to the curb) him for being 18 and stupid so who will it be?

  54. SouthBeachTakeover

    @ramencatholic Since LeBron is gone, I need a new role model. And I’m thinkin it should be you, with all your motivational talk.

  55. Ramen my heart is literally aching but I’ll follow you to hell and back…dammit you’re great!

  56. btw ee i didn’t celebrate your birthday or the holiday. On the 4th I sent my kid with his dad and sat in my room naked the entire the whole day and watched Bruno. Then again I take that back maybe I did celebrate…

  57. ya mamma, that’s a celebration! Good for you. I better go now, before I get into trouble. Night all, I’ll keep you updated on word as I hear things from her.

  58. evryfing back to normil yet?

  59. Ashu; Who Cares

    the last one isnt lame, nor was the 3rd last one.
    lamebook :|

  60. I agree with Ashu. This entry in general is surprisingly weak.

  61. @SouthBeachTakeover, I try, I try. I’m glad I could be all motivational for you and such. ;D

    @yo momma, I’m glad I can be here for you when LeBron is not, and that I can be great and all. It warms my heart, really.(;

  62. ee, tell word i’ll miss her until she gets back. She shall always be our pervert.
    This lessage may be a bit late, but I just so happened to finally get home after a long fucking night, of awesomeness. As for the Basketball thing, since i’m a fan of the Miami Heat, I am quite glad they got LeBron.
    Now for a hilarious video about Cleveland.

  63. That was pretty good nuff. The house for the price of a VCR slayed me.

  64. porkchop_sundae

    park brake differential is weakening

  65. I have been flipping through the pages for the last week and I have to say that everything that is going on is quite scary.

    This also explains alot. As one or two of you may have noticed, I havent been on here much lately. A little while back my laptop caught a virus as I was browsing through Lamebook. This was about the same time that everybody’s names started being hijacked. I happen to know enough about computers that somebody was trying to hack my accounts.(E-mail,Limewire,Facebook,and Lamebook.)Stuff like that. I got pissed and said screw it all for a little while.

    Slowly but surely I have been coming back only to see it has gotten worse. I love my Lamebook and the people that I interact with in here. (You guys know who you are.)But I do know one thing. If this problem doesn’t get fixed soon, you will not see me or a few other people in here for that matter because I am sure none of us want to be hijacked. Hopefully it doesn’t come to this.

    Keep your computers safe people. I know nobody else wants this to happen to them.

  66. ha, i like the last one.

  67. Didn’t read all the posts yet, but surely Bailey’s is the only acceptable thing to put on any kind of breakfast cereal?

  68. DizzyBallerina, I’m intruiged. What’s the problem? :(

  69. I tell a lie, I’m intrigued.

  70. With all this negativity going around, it is important for us to focus on the positives. I’m sure we can all come up with something positive that we’ve seen recently. For example, Denise knows that Obama is involved with politics. That’s excellent Denise! You’re a star!

  71. SouthBeachTakeover

    @HeSaidWhat I understand your troubles. I was hacked and abandoned my old account, but fortunately realised that I love Lamebook so I came back. We need more committed commenters to try and get through this. Remember, you must die before you can go to heaven(sorry, don’t want to sound like Dan_Fargis).

  72. Yes, I bet Christina is a laugh-riot after breakfast… Unless she’s a mean drunk .. but like Walter suggests let’s stay positive.

  73. @nuff, that video makes me laugh every time.
    But LeBron is still a doucher.

    Seriously, I dislike Justin Beiber and think he looks like a girl too and sounds like a girl and hasn’t reached puberty.. But it’s old news. I thought we were over that, and we could all go back to not caring about him.
    sorry for the rant, I find the people who hate on people just as annoying as those who love them. Obsessing over anything, whether you love it or hate it, is not coolio.

  75. SouthBeachTakeover

    No, but seriously at least we aren’t Detroit

  76. I have followed lamebook for awhile now,even when the posts suck you guys are awesome. I hope word comes back as well, ee hope you enjoyed your birthday, its my daughters b-day as well ;)

    as for the Lebron thing… I live in northeastern ohio and I am pretty tired of hearing about the whole thing…yes what he did was narcissistic indeed, and yes he quit the playoffs…but come on people sports players come and go, they get traded, injured, sign on to other teams etc… the funniest quote I heard “Mel Gibson is lucky that the “King” decided to do this large publicity stunt”
    oh, and he did great things for Akron, charity wise, so lets not forget about all of the that either and @ SouthBeach…didn’t Dan’s letter sound similar to the whole John Kitna thing awhile back :)

  77. I know what you are saying South Beach. I don’t want to leave Lamebook at all. I love the site and the people here too. I just don’t want to see everybody’s name tarnished. We do a fine job of that all by ourselves. I just hope Lamebook isn’t talking out of their asses because you won’t be seeing a lot of us in here anymore.

  78. krasivaya_devushka

    Is this fixed yet?

  79. Holy shiznit, what is the world coming to? I go on a trip in the real life and come back to learn that wordy has been banned, IDs have been hijacked, and LB is giving away free viruses?!

    Sorry to be a ‘tart, but I’m out of the loop – can someone fill me in on the mishegas that has occurred here?

    That’ll teach me to try and have a life outside of the internet…

  80. @Miss Shegas … word wasn’t ‘banned’ … she was pissed off and has decided to leave until lamebook can fix the name hijacking.

  81. @Miss Shegas
    Consider yourself lucky, you missed all sorts of retardation.

    I would love to provide some guidance. Keep in mind that when it comes to relationships, I have the emotional age of an 8 year old, so your boy might be a little too mature for me. But I’m willing to give it a shot for the sake of your vaginal bliss.

  82. Bah. Wish there were new posts in the weekends..I’m bored as hell!

  83. Just read all the shit from a few days ago..fucked up

  84. SouthBeachTakeover

    @insanity you have no idea what bored is until you are at a girls fastpitch “baseball” game for 2 1\2 hours. I can not stress the quotation marks around baseball enough.

  85. new live video up, yoink get in touch!

  86. Okay SouthBeachTakeover. You’re probably right haha. But here i am at 3 p clockbat night checking lamebook to see if the whole name problem is fixed yet.
    Hmm..good thing i’m going on vacation for a week tomorrow lol.
    Hope its fixed when I get back..Hate to see all the fun people leave

  87. 3 o clock..damn phone

  88. Random note:

    I got the ‘word’ from our word that the issue has been fixed. So when you see our darling wonder vixen posting on here, no fret it is our beloved! Yay, she’s back all!

    Thanks lambook, we need her!

    end random not.

  89. •note

    Wow ee needs a drink.

  90. Awesome! well, welcome back word :) and cheers on that drink ee haha

  91. Yay!

  92. awsum!!!!!

  93. evenin’ yoink

  94. if that’s fake yoink, lamebook’ll be in trouble!

  95. No trouble alord, all’s good. yoink is yoink. Smile and have a drink!

  96. Is a celebration, cheers my lamebook comrades.

  97. imposter pissed off so i come back

  98. i’m a bit worried, yoink. you haven’t spoken to me since the other night…

    if i could have changed what happened, i would. but i can’t.

    can’t we just let bygones be bygones? and survey the rubble of our relationship, take stock, and build something new?

    because all isn’t lost, yoink. it isnt. what we had was so good, so strong. worth fighting for. you may call it decorative windmills in the sky. but i think we deserve a second chance.

    please. i still love you. i wish you could see me now, weeping into my carling. i still love you, yoink. i still love you.

  99. Krazy Eyez Killa

    I think I may love Word a little, as interwebs peoples go, she is one of my favs. ee gets love aswell, now i’m going to sleep.

  100. wat u meen alord???????

  101. i want us to go out on a date.

  102. uh oh ..

  103. krasivaya_devushka

    LOL @ 98!!

  104. ur tryna be funni but no

  105. lamebook < integrity

  106. Thanks ee, what an awesome wingwoman you are! I love you, girlfriend.

    Well I’ve been chatting to the boys from Lamebook (what lovely fellas), and they tell me the issue that affected a few of us has been rectified (I sincerely hope that’s the real yoink up there, or this spiel is null & void) – we’re seemingly back in business. Everyone’s emails definitely expedited the process, and on that topic, thank you all for that. I’m virtually touched.

    We can once again swim with relative safety in the Lamebook pool, but my advice is to shower after, as this can be a dirty body of water, and amen to the dirt, I say.

    By the way fake wordpervert, you sucked at being me.

    Hmmm, I was troubled that my buddies, Soup and alord took the bait. Boys, I thought we were synced up?

    What a strange couple of weeks it’s been, so moving on…

  107. SouthBeachTakeover

    This is where lamebook gets awkward and creepy

  108. word, in my defence, i struggle with the one reality there is, without suddenly being bombarded by multiple new ones!

    good to have you back.

  109. krasivaya_devushka

    Welcome back, word! :)

    Ok, what’s up with this yoink again now? Make up your mind as to who you want to be.

  110. beleve the imposter if u want. not my problum if u dunt.

  111. A – men to that.

  112. fanku mass

  113. yoink, have you read the posts from the last few days? you were conspicuous in your absence whilst ‘theartistformerlyknownasyoink’ was posting.

    just sayin’……

    don’t you like her or sumfin?

  114. … oh for sure, I’m not really mass

  115. word, I fucking love you girl! With that, I’d love to stay and chat, but my bed is calling me (early I know, but we’ve had company for a week, and my quota has been filled and then some) night all. word, it’s good to have you back! I look forward to our random light night encounters with open arms!

  116. Night girlfriend, and thanks again.

  117. So now I’m confused on this whole yoink thing.
    I seriously fucking hate the internetz sometimes. :(

  118. yeh, mega gayer. so i’m off to bed.

    last night i had a dream that someone shoved a load of uncooked unsmoked sliced back bacon in my mouth, and i couldn’t get it out.



  119. im the reel fuckin yoink. fa reel

  120. Ok, well I guess I’ll take your word for it yoink.
    I was hoping you’d be back, I didn’t want lamebook to become completely unenjoyable, with everyone leaving & such.

  121. shud i go????????? i fot wunce the impostr left, i culd comebaack

  122. I don’t believe so.
    I’m pretty sure the problems have been cleared from what I read? At least for the most part. So you should be fine.

  123. umm..that doesn’t sound like the original yoink…I really hope this doesn’t mean the problem hasn’t been fixed.

  124. That’s what I was thinking Ivy, quite honestly /: I’m very skeptical of it all. I’m trying to believe it but I really do not know if I should.

  125. The issue that affected me was fixed, of that I’m certain. The Lamebook folks assure me of this, and if I have any further problems, have given me instructions on what to do.

    As for the yoink thing- whatever.

  126. Oh, I see.
    Well that’s good.
    I guess the yoink think is whatever, though very confusing. Ha, oh well. As long as everything else is pretty much back to normal.

  127. I’m sure someone will get to the bottom of it eventually. I have more pressing issues right now, like getting to the Doctor to have the laceration on the palm of my hand sutured.

    Self-inflicted, but most definitely accidental. The Lamebook fiasco hasn’t lead me to suicidal tendencies, ok.

  128. Word, just like I do in the real world, I take no responsibility for my lack of awareness. Should I have noticed the differences in style? Probably. But booze makes me easy.

    You would think that my time in Thailand would have made me a little more skeptical. I simply gathered 4 or 5 hookers, expecting a nice wholesome encounter, and I ended up faced with just…just an avalanche of cock. But did I learn anything? Only that my asshole is similar to an octopus: Tiny openings are no barrier to a determined spongy body.

  129. That’s not yoink… However.. Remember that the ..’real’ yoink changed her name to the artist… She probably get rid of the yoink name so it became available for the
    ‘new’ yoink. I am glad that things are back to normal, well as close to normal as it gets. I enjoy everyones comments.

  130. @laugh, good point.
    Of course, who knows. Unless some of these people were to know each other in real life & knew it all was true, we really can’t know. The internet has that problem.

  131. How exactly is the first one a win? It’s been done. Insanely.

    3rd one was pretty lame as well.

  132. Overdone*

  133. @ Soup
    U always make me lol :P
    Glad that there are comments to read in the weekends..
    ee? Hangover?

  134. You Got Doddified

    Can we not just contact the admins so they can find the old yoink and chuck out the new one?

  135. I created an account JUST to express how happy I am that Word is back.

    I’ve been vigilantly watching lamebook since it’s creation (you know, back when you didn’t need to register a username). I laughed with you when the ‘dooshbag’ came around…I cried with you when we weren’t allowed to make fun of the one-armed flying wonder anymore. I look forward you each of your comments to brighten my otherwise mundane day.

    So it is with a tearful ‘hurrah!’ that I say, welcome back Word! You have been missed.

  136. @laugh – for all we know, it could be some random person who signed up as “theartistformalyknownwasyoink” or whatever.

  137. So word’s back :D That’s awesome.

    And then on the other hand either yoink is back, or some dumbass out there who doesn’t quite understood the difference between funny and FUCKING LAME is impersonating ‘him/her’. There’s a moral in here somewhere, and it’s something like ‘this yoink thing is so dull I want to cry’.

    Welcome back word :)

  138. Oh and Hey Elli Mac :) You seem cool, hope you stick around. It’s always good to have someone who won’t keep asking what Ben or Frodo means ;)

  139. Wow that hole was dark! It’s so bright in here.

    I hope this wont happen again. Lamebook has informed me that if this happens again, we need to copy the post, send it to them so they know where to look, and they will block the IP adress.

    I am stil kind of sceptical about yoink up there, but I guess we will see in due time.

    Welcome back to the cess pool word. Just remember the rules,
    1.Horseplay must be very rough and demeaning
    2.You are only allowed to wear swimsuit bottoms only.
    3.The bottoms are optional.
    4.Whatever you do,DON’T DRINK THE WATER!

    That is all, Thank You.

  140. You forgot the awesome hat part HeSaidWhat. You can never forget the awesome hats.

    word, i’m glad my favourite pervert is back in action!

    And HOLY SHIT! What the hell is happening? I am so confused now with this whole yoink thing! The artist had wooed me in with her words and now I don’t know what to think. Off to work now, regardless.

  141. I have copied everyone’s comments and sent them in. Soon I will have this place all to myself.

  142. So that has been your master plan this entire time Soup! You dirty dog you.

  143. You know Soup, That was the first thing that crossed my mind when I posted that. I knew somebody would make a comment about that.

    I’m sorry nuff, you’re right.
    5.Your hat can be no shorter than six inches tall.
    6.Your staff can not be shorter than your hat.(Soup is the exception).
    7.You CAN NOT be sober. We don’t care if its prescription pills,alcohol,mushrooms,ect…You will be banned for life if one of these are not found on your person.

    Am I forgetting anything guys?

  144. Thanks again everyone. Almost did a tendon yesterday!, but the hand is still intact thankfully. So now onwards and upwards.

    It’s 4.30 in the morning here, I’m up just to watch the World Cup final – my heart is with Spain for the win, and of course my loins are for their Striker, David Villa.

    Soup, what can I say to that? Awesome.

  145. That is much better HeSaidWhat. The rules are straight forward and easy to follow. Right now I am posting this while shooting up heroin in the bathroom at work, multitasking at it’s finest if you ask me.

  146. No gramatical mistakes either! I’d say you have done that once or twice nuff.

  147. I would stick to the threesomes in the living room if I were you word. Ten people in the kitchen is just to dangerous! To many sharp utensils. Not to mention I have kicked on a burner doing that before. Lets just say thing got pretty hot.

  148. ambersthereason

    Whiskey and cereal would make you a champion, smirnoff ice and cereal makes you a 17 year old girl who’s parents ran out of oj.

  149. Yay! David, I’ll be having one in your honour tonight, and a drink as well.

  150. Ok so I go on hoidays for 4 days and everything is wierd. So what happened with word, I see she is here ( which is a yay!) but anyone care to explain so I don’t need to go back and read a shit load of old posts.

  151. yoink isn’t yoink, she’s an intelligent girl, except yoink actually might be yoink and that girl a fake, somebody’s been robbing people’s usernames because they’re a lazy, unfunny twat, word left, Lamebook wanted her back, Lamebook fixed the problem that was giving the lazy, unfunny twat the opportunity to steal people’s usernames and just generally not be funny, and word came back.

  152. Thanks Hobo

  153. there’s no way that up there is girlyoink

  154. i neva sed i was a girl. impostr sed that an i lef cus the dickcheese impostr made me. i come back an noone beleve me.

  155. I believe ya yoink :)

  156. fanku

  157. krasivaya_devushka

    Hooray for Spaaain! :D

  158. Every time I see yoink’s typing, I hear a thick Scottish accent.:D

  159. yoink is greedy with vowels, no more than one per word! he spells come “cum” and “fanku” doesn’t look right. I could be wrong, but if I am right, I am scared that I am fluent in

  160. krasivaya_devushka

    I agree with you l.o.l.
    He didn’t use periods at the end of his sentences either. So, this is getting confusing again…

  161. Either way it’s someone screwing with you. That girl sounded sincere before, and since you can actually almost read these yoink comments, I’d lean towards this being foink (= fake yoink, whatever that even means at this point).

    People here might want to believe yoink is “real”, but cmon, do you think a barely literate is going to spend his time reading and commenting on a site called lamebook? Take it for what it is, a joke, and an unfunny, annoying and childish one at that.

    But I’m sure yoink will be along to prove me wrong with new bad spelling and grammar that I won’t bother reading.. I might actually comment around here if people talked about something else besides yoink and dan fucking fargis.. But then again, I have anger issues…

  162. This is Lamebook at its best. Some of the commenter’s also.

  163. I think Bobby won a free laptop for making the 1,000,000th ‘Justin Bieber is a girl’ joke of the week.

  164. nah doesn’t cut it with me foink…girlyoink seemed sincere and pretty cool as her good at spelling etc alter-ego.
    I’d like to see her back.
    Also, although original illiterate yoink appeared dum, he/she was actually pretty sharp and had some word skills.
    Foink seems a pale imitation.

  165. This yoink is not the OG yoink..or um..OY? Which saddens me :-/ The Original Yoink was hilariously witty and made up some of the best phrases and spelled words 100% correct phonetically.

  166. to be onist i dunt relly care if ya beleve me

  167. I still love yoink!

    And how come no new material since yesterday?

  168. With Yoink turning out to be a 22 year old ugly, boring British girl, I guess I can get rid of my screen name now and come back to my original self…
    Dont laugh people, I just lost a son…

  169. @yoink (real or fake) Please do tell how you came up with your screen name?

  170. Paranoid Android

    The past few days have been a fucking massive headfuck. Thank Jeebus that we now have a sense of normality (or whatever passes for it) back.

    Still unsure of the yoink thing though, ‘cos if it was that girl faking, I have a message for you:- Thanks for being such a patronising/condescending fucking bitch.

    As you were.

  171. I believe that girl who said she adopted the yoink moniker as an experiment..and her explanation seemed plausible.
    This yoink here is like a cardboard cutout compared to the original yoink.
    Maybe girlyoink will return to clear up the mess and fake yoink will stop trying to confuse the shit out of everyone.

    I have never written the word ‘yoink’ so many times in my life.
    It’s a great cartoon word.

  172. i want girlyoink to come back so i can put a paper bag over her head & marry her.

  173. o.o You can put a peper bag over my head alord,
    but you might be in for a suprise during the honeymoon lol

  174. ah the innocent old days eh alord, when men would put paper bags over girls heads just to marry them..;)

  175. theartistformerlyknownasyoink

    beleve that if u want douche but its actuly me an i haf bof

  176. I feel like a part of me has died. ):

  177. theartistformerlyknownasyoink

    Right I’ve actually been away for the weekend so haven’t been on here, I really cannot be bothered to explain the whole ‘yoink.’ thing again but everything I said before is true, yoink was a made up character and I can also assure you that if lamebook have said the problem is sorted they have lied or have not completely rectified it. I also love that everyone just assumes I must be hideously ugly on the basis that for a 22 year old girl to have a sense of humour she must be an ogre. lol

  178. theartistformerlyknownasyoink

    I have just checked it out and think I know how this is happening, so firstly sorry for saying lamebook lied, they haven’t. You can no longer change what name you post under, however I am still on my ‘yoink’ username account, when I changed it to ‘theartistformerlyknownasyoink’ I just changed it by putting that in the name on the registration page and selecting that as what I wanted to post under. Went back there now to sheck out if it can still be changed and it cannot. So when the imposters decided to go into this section and change their name they did so and now lamebook have ‘corrected’ it so it is stuck on what they already had it to post under. So say fred nordie put in the name box that he was yoink and selected to post under that name if he hadn’t changed it back before the problem was corrected he would have been stuck with posting with the yoink name.

  179. so you’ll marry me then….?

  180. theartistformerlyknownasyoink

    176 an 177 anit me

  181. theartistformerlyknownasyoink

    alorslums no fanks

  182. now you’re just being silly.

  183. instead of constantly trying to figure out who’s real and who’s not, i am just going to disregard all of you now. so whoever once was real is exiled to the land of unreality for your troubles.

    at one time i liked yoink, at another i had a crush on theartistformerlyknownasyoink.

    now neither of you exist to me. there are any number of combinations of possibilities. but i am going for a simple, blanket, whitewash, pan-nihilistic no-yoink vision.

    now i can be zen-like again.

  184. theartistformerlyknownasyoink

    alordslums if it’s frustrating for you imagine how frustrating it is for me.

  185. theartistformerlyknownasyoink

    an me

  186. theartistformerlyknownasyoink

    ah fuck off and stop impersonating you’re not even good at it.

  187. 183, 184 and 185 anit different people.

  188. theartistformerlyknownasyoink

    fuck off and stop impersonating you’re not even good at it

  189. theartistformerlyknownasyoink

    181 an 182 an 186 anit differn

  190. @ tafkay… maybe you could lose the yoink thing completely and get yourself a brand new non-yoink name… and then we can get to know the real you, as well as completely ignore any yoink related names. This will save us all from having to go through this painful process of reading what looks like some schizophrenic arguing with themselves….

  191. glitterandtrauma

    @alordslums yes please do now ignore the yoink thing completely. I am the “girlyoink” as some people are calling me. I’m done argueing with impersonators. Really isn’t worth the time and energy, YOINK IS DEAD> RIP!!

    @djenna8girl = done :)

  192. nice blog ‘girlyoink’.

  193. as for yoink,

    ‘long live instant technology and the ability to remove someone from your life instantly.’

  194. Thank you glitterandtrauma! :)

    sometimes theres nothing better than creating and then killing off a character….

  195. glitterandtrauma

    @alord indeed, though you are defeating th object slightly by still calling me ‘girlyoink’ now we need to get the mods to class the word ‘yoink’ as a bad swearword that needs moderation, surely thats possible?

    @djenna8girl yes and I must say it feels liberating :)

  196. @GandT do you have a blog? i think i remember you mentioning (during that initial y&^*$ confessional post) youre actually a writer?

  197. glitterandtrauma

    @djenna No I don’t have a blog. Yes I am a writer but seriously when I say i’m a writer it sounds a lot more grand than it actually is! lol I just write for my local newspaper, I’m the one that gets the basic crappy stories (eg ‘The towns children had great fun at the summer fete.’ and ‘The flower show raised £1000 for children with ASD.’) that no one ever reads. lol

  198. krasivaya_devushka

    This is some weird shit!!

  199. i hate sketch apart from the toilets. full of vacuous model douches.

    last time i was there i spent the whole night telling tall russian girls i was a ‘nodel’, and would they sleep with me.

    suffice to say i ended up alone at home, vomiting into my standard issue toilet between sobs, with twin peaks on in the background.

  200. glitterandtrauma

    @alordslums what????

  201. never mind.

    i think we’ve drifted apart.

    ‘the falcon cannot hear the falconer.’

  202. CommentsAtLarge


    Not sure if you’ll end up seeing this since I missed the real-time exchange but glad you’re back!

  203. glitterandtrauma

    @alordslums also to answer your previous question the ‘will you marry me?’ I would say yes but you’re supposed to be getting it on with kras- Keep following that yellow brick road!!

  204. @krasivaya_devushka isnt the weird shit that goes on what gets you hooked on this site? I stumbled across this place about 2 weeks ago, and haven’t been able to leave..haha

    @GandT.. oh, i thought @alords mentioned you had one #191 (do you ever feel tempted to try to get a few pranks past the copy editors and liven up your day?)

    @alords… the trick is to talk to the models just long enough to steal their coke (toilet’s the right place for it) then youre free to enjoy the rest of the night – somewhere else…

  205. glitterandtrauma

    @alordslums I’m just confused by the ‘sketch’ part, is it a club? the rest I can picture.

  206. glitterandtrauma

    @djenna I think he was referring to the ‘yoink is dead’ comment. Djenna girl I really should try but i’m the newbie thats scared of losing my job although I know someone who once wrote an article for the paper and replaced the articles subjects surname, hunt, with ‘chunt.’ I also last week wrote an article in the style of he who should now no longer be named, although that didn’t get past editing, it got returned to me with a note saying ‘I don’t know what has fried your brain this weekend but I can’t edit this, sort it out, if you’re not well you can go home.’ It took me a while to rectify it.

  207. @GandT… i think its time to slip a Mike Oxhard or Pat McRotch into your next story – it’s practically a journo rite of passage :)

  208. glitterandtrauma

    haha yeah that is very tempting, or a Ben Dover, Mike Hunt and Phil Yewup.

  209. krasivaya_devushka

    @203, Yes, it is haha :)

    lol@ Mike Oxhard and Pat McRotch… first time I heard of those :D

  210. even the bbc eds do it sometimes.

    i read this a couple of weeks ago:

    ‘the boy, 13, whose headmaster described as ‘full of life’, was pronounced dead at the scene.’

    when i was a young boy at school, i used to have an ongoing joke at the expense of my history teacher whose name was peter dowsett – i would really transparently attribute specious quotes to spurious characters that were merely thinly veiled transliterations of his name. for example, if it was an essay on tsarist russia, i’d quote ‘esteemed essayist count piotr dozetsky; if i was writing on the spanish inquisition it would be ‘landowner and scholar, don pedro dowsenio; if on the french enlightenment, ‘recondite and little-known neo-platonic mystic ‘pierre de la douce’ etc…

    i think it amused him as much as it did me.

  211. glitterandtrauma

    Haha alord that really is amazing, I must start being a bit more naughty with it my probation was up months ago so I really should let loose plus the bastards don’t give me any articles that people actually bother to read so it wouldn’t be harmful.

    Will also say I do like your music, was a bit careful about saying it as yoink as in my head he was more of a chav character and I couldn’t really picture what music he would like.

  212. @alordslums…. i like the versions of your name in french: “le Chatelain Taudis”, and in german: “die Hergott Verslumen”

    @GandT… i like yours in alcoholese: GinandTonic :)

  213. glitterandtrauma

    I really can’t handle Gin and Tonic, that along with straight vodka are the drinks my stomach likes to reject Djenna. I’m not expecting many people to get the origins of my username but anyone that does will be automatically awesome in my books. :) lol

  214. nice.


  215. biffy clyro!

  216. glitterandtrauma

    @alord yep that automatically makes you awesome! :)

  217. ha am i still awesome if i knew it was biffy clyro but i’m not particularly a fan?

  218. glitterandtrauma

    Well it’s not one of their well known songs so how did you know? Google? lol well it does wobble slightly, Biffy are amazing how can you not like them? and I have a weird fetish for Simon Neil?!?

  219. yeah, i can’t handle gin either, i keep trying it, and i keep rejecting it lol. so vodka is still my drink of choice (goes with everything, even cornflakes!) until i grow up enough to become the gin-soaked tart i know i can be

  220. gin is the best!

    it won’t be the gin per se, just that you’ve not tried the right one yet.

    once you’ve had a tanqueray gin and tonic you’re sold.

    gt – i didn’t google or wiki it! look how quickly after you asked i posted! the gee-tar player in our band really likes biffy clyro. i’m more of a gilbert o’sullivan/ann lee man myself.

  221. glitterandtrauma

    alord no I just can’t stomach gin Maybe I will try it again some day but the memories of before are not good. It’s not the taste it’s the effect, though maybe that’s the quantity I consume rather than the quality. I’ll stick to whicky I think. I won’t even try to pretend I’ve heard of them.

  222. glitterandtrauma


  223. good choice. whisky’s the only spirit that trumps gin!

    although stay off the gay bourbon stuff – make sure it’s a proper single malt.

  224. glitterandtrauma

    yeah I prefer irish whisky though, I think they really know how to have their alcohol.

  225. @alord okay, stopping at the bottle-o for tanqueray gin is on my to do list. Drinking said gin is the next task. i’m so eager to take my first step down the dank, dark path to proper gin drinking i’m going to pretend its thursday instead of tuesday today :)

    thanks for the recommendation, i will let you know how i go :)

  226. glitterandtrauma

    I’ve always wonsered why different alcoholic drinks have different effects on you? Wine makes me say I love you to everyone and everything then fall into a deep sleep, Vodka with something just makes me happy but on it’s own makes me sick,Beer makes me loud and jolly, gin makes me sick and any combination of shots, whisky and midori makes me happy and horny. How can all these drinks that have the same ingredient that makes you drunk have such different effects?

  227. they may all be alcoholic, but they all are made from different things.. eg. vodka=potatoes, whiskey=rye, beer=hops, midori=melon etc.etc

    all i have learnt after many years of drinking is clear spirits/drinks= no hangover=able to start drinking sooner haha

  228. glitterandtrauma

    I’m quite lucky I don’t really suffer too badly from hangovers I’m sometimes extra tired but that’s it. lol

  229. yeah, i’ve always found it funny that GHB makes me really horny, and heroin sends me into a deep sleep.

    on a serious note, whisky makes me angry and do whatever comes into my head that second to do, beer barely does anything to me, and… if i’m at home, i can have a bottle of red wine and feel really sick as well as ill the next day, but when i’m in a warm country, i can have 3 bottles of red and be fine. wine makes me maudlin, and makes me think it’s a good idea to call an ex or watch breakfast club.

    tequila makes me want to fuck also.

  230. glitterandtrauma

    It’s strange isn’t it? I haven’t quite experimented as far with drugs as you but with the alcohol. Tequila does it for me too it must be a strong aphrodisiac and I try not to have nights with lots of whisky and coke and tequila shots too often as they as a mix increase the chance of me becoming a nympho and waking up next to a munter. Never a good way to start the day.

  231. Jeeze, who even drinks smirnoff ice anymore?

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