Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Time Stoppin’ Tom

previous post: Gettin’ Ghetto

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26 Comments

  1. STEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVERRRRRRRRRRRRRR YA LAME ARSEHOLES!

  2. Stopping time to rest right before you blow your load is kind of an interesting concept, but 70 years? If you’re stopping time, I don’t really think you’ll age.

  3. @beatus: as he is ‘stopping time’ and resting his load, obviously his heart is still beating while time is stopped around him. Biological processes are still occuring, thereby he is aging. you must be familiar with the appropriate Twilight Zone episodes in order to converse intelligibly on the concept of stopping time. Cheers!!

  4. ^Whilst I can travel through time. I am a true expert.

  5. If he kept stopping time just before he came, then he would only come one load. Therefore there would not be a multiplication of cum. Also, this would mean the recorded sex scene would be around 50 years or something. Dumbfuck.

  6. Just so we’re all on the same page, this is one of the examples of the “lamest” of Facebook, right? Not “funniest”?

    I hope Tom dies a virgin. Soon.

  7. This is more flawed than Back to the Future.

  8. @ Bacchante, yes, it is lame. Very lame.

  9. if I could stop time, I’d stop after reading the first line of that Confessions of Mental Instabilities up there, and then I’d go out and get very drunk. I’d prolly not come back.

  10. I would do tons of cool shiit if I could stop time

  11. ^tom just has wanks. lots of wanks. i suspect tom is a wanker.

  12. crustylovelips

    Tons of cool shit? Bullshit. We’d all do the same thing…steal, and perve on whoever/whatever you find attractive.

  13. ‘Shop my load’

    Is this guy some kind of fucking retard? Or (more likely) has he heard his dad’s hoarse, gasping voice in his ear of an evening after a drugged glass of warm milk and, barely conscious but still straining for fatherly appreciation, just tried to copy the sounds he hears?

  14. Here are two of my standard responses to the time travel question. Just choose your favourite and then fuck off.

    1 – I would travel back in time, fuck a monkey to give it AIDS and then force an African tribal monkey hunter to have unprotected sex with said monkey.

    2 – I would travel back in time and fuck Mother Teresa before she turned into a wrinkly brown conker.

  15. Virgin.

  16. This is a classic from 4chan from years ago.

  17. crusty, you’re a lot less perverted than I gave you credit for.

    I think that most of the guys on this forum wouldn’t stop at perving – they’d fuck ‘em standing up, then leave them in a sticky confused mess.

  18. ^ It’s no fun if there’s no reaction letting you know how well you’re doing. I’m definitely not a selfish one in that regard, so something like what you described wouldn’t be very entertaining to me.

  19. Mrsbeatusmongous

    ^so why you just lie there, honey?

  20. ^Where is your avatar?

  21. Lamebook needs some sort of copypasta advisor; a guy they hire to check each of the screenshots to eliminate the ones that are just old copypasta from 4chan.

  22. Goblin? Are you suggesting they *pay* somebody for this shit?

  23. Mrsbeatusmongous

    beatus gave my avatar to his latest mistress :(

  24. ^you’re going to flog him, in front of all of us now for it… right?

  25. @19, because you disgust me.

  26. crustylovelips

    I’m a polite young man. Old people love me. However, what would be fun is to masturbate and smear your jizz into the eyes of your enemies, only re-starting time once it had dried. They’d be like…whoaaaaaa, my eyes are sealed shut…and I’d be like…Yeaaaaaaaah with my jizz, you cocksucker.

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