Thursday, November 12, 2009

Stone Cold Shame


previous post: Let’s Get It On



  1. OH SHIT!

  2. oh… my… god

  3. that’s just really really sad. poor girl.

  4. Now I’m depressed

  5. i can see how she could misinterpret this. she kinda beats around the bush.

  6. fkae

  7. I’m an insecure asshole who totally gets a kick out of everyone’s sufferings and misfortunes….but that sucks. seriously, poor girl.

  8. Cool story.

  9. mike, i hear you…. nothing constructive to say…

    jeez…. poor girl.


  11. talk about feel awful for replying. OMG!

  12. Why the hell would you facebook stuff like that? It’s to the guy… Do dead people facebook?

  13. @duh: You’re wrong, this is not fkae. It’s probably not fake either.

  14. @Tooty — hilarious!

  15. Whatever. Fuck Jessica! Stop using Facebook status updates for quick sympathy points you selfish bitch. If he died yesterday you should have been with his family planning the funeral, not updating your Facebook. Chris is better off dead than with this selfish bitch.

  16. I used to work in a funeral home. Sometimes men have massive erections due to rigor mortis. I lasted two weeks before temptation got the best of me. The dilemma is whether to suck it, sit on it, or shit on it. Sometimes it’s the trifecta.

  17. Cool story..

  18. Skatastic, you took the words right out of my keyboard.

    Seriously… Why make someone feel like a grade-A heel for commenting on something like this? If you are going to post a pity rant, at least inform your friends that you’re talking about a dead guy.

  19. That’s right Goblox, she clearly spent no time with his family at all because we all know updating your Facebook status takes all day. Christ. I agree this is a little personal for a Facebook status update, but it doesn’t make her a selfish bitch.

  20. I think it’s perfectly obvious that he’s dead, or at least totally out of her life in some way. The fact that there’s no more wedding is pretty obvious. Maybe this was her way of informing family and friends so that they wouldn’t make her feel worse asking about her wedding. It’s pretty hard to just come out and say “My fiancé is dead, you can get a refund on the gifts and don’t bother buying a new outfit”. A friend of mine recently lost her brother suddenly and actually the support she got from people on facebook helped at least a little.

  21. Aww :-(

  22. Does she really have to come right out and say he is dead? It is obvious that he is.

    The person response is lame, but this isn’t really funny.. It is just sad.. I don’t really think it should be on lamebook.. I like to get a laugh out of the things on here, but after reading this one I just feel bad for the girl..

  23. That’s really sad.
    But he’s dead, I don’t think he checks his Facebook.

  24. The girl that commented on her status was just plain rude. It’s pretty obvious that chris was dead or at least out of her life when Jessica says “I still can’t get over the fact that you are gone” in the second sentence.

    Really sad, and shouldn’t be on lamebook. :(

  25. Poor girl, you guys are brutal. Sure, updating your facebook may seem pointless for something so personal, but after a major loss like that, you need to let it out somehow.

    Also, if you read it quickly, it doesn’t seem like someone died, just that they are away, maybe overseas or something.

  26. tooty & snip! – FTW!

    but seriously, that is rather unfortunate for jessica. :(

  27. Hold on…
    How the hell would Kaitlyn miss the first line on not get that he’s dead? =S
    “I still can’t get over the face that you are gone.” -.-”

  28. Hold on…
    How the hell would Kaitlyn miss the first line and not get that he’s dead? =S
    “I still can’t get over the face that you are gone.” -.-”

  29. If anyone doesn’t comprehend that at the very least something is seriously wrong between Jessica and Chris from that post, then it is highly probable that they are legally mentally retarded. I bet Kaitlyn still has to use safety scissors.

  30. I hate Kaitlyn’s attitude of entitlement, and worse, her stupidity. From Jessica’s post, Chris is clearly out of her life (whether it’s by exiting the relationship or exiting the living world), and the first thing that Kaitlyn interprets is, “OMG! A weddinggggg! I better get inviiiiited so I can dress up and get shitfaced on someone else’s dime!”

  31. exactly what Kid said ^^^

  32. I thought Chris was deployed. Still, Kaitlyn’s response is grubby.

  33. hahaha lol, that’s brilliant.

  34. *jackie martling laugh*

  35. Oh shit :S

  36. So she was spending all night on facebook. First post 9:18, second post 10:14. She probably had to get on Farmville and harvest some of Chris’ crops and get on Yoville and tickle Chris’ character….maybe tell it some jokes or something…

  37. I’m going to Coldstone on the 22nd, Mourning girls are well good in bed.

  38. Yep, I thought he was in the military too, just deployed. Definitely didn’t see the dead thing coming.

  39. I’ll be at the funeral ;D

  40. ugh, that’s awkward

  41. i think my penis is actually a vagina

  42. If there is Facebook in heaven, Chris just put Jessica on “Ignore” for the stupidity of that post…

  43. Kaitlyn is a fucking idiot who only scans status updates and comments without knowing what the fuck is going on.

  44. I’m not going to judge the way she chooses to grieve as I pray to God I’m not ever in that situation.

    Reading it, I assumed he dumped her and she was being melodramatic. Her friend is stupid and obviously only reads verbs.

    But to find out he was dead, that was just a punch in the stomach.

  45. It’s okay Jessica, I am here for you babe. Chaz will make it all feel better. Call or txt me ;P

  46. While death is devastating, you don’t post “I still can’t get over the fact you’re gone”, the day after the person dies.

  47. I prescribe a condolence penis stat.

  48. Really sad :( , dont think this should be on lamebook, abit to far if you ask me..

  49. fuckin ouch, this isn’t lame at all assholes

  50. Too much for lamebook. Even you ppl should have SOME standards on what you post here, dontcha think???

  51. It’s lame because it is fake.

  52. Chris was killed a few days ago riding his bike in Orlando. He son turned 2 the day after Chris died. This is a tragic story. He traveled alot (he was a pro photographer) and they kept in touch on FB as well as other sources. It isn’t strange to post a message to someone you love that is gone if you have posted a million messages that same way while alive.

    Not sure how Kaitlyn missed the story – it was all over several people’s pages.

  53. A Friend:

    SO you are the insensitive jerk that submitted this?

  54. Wow, it’s kind of sad this is on lamebook. The whole office has been really upset that he died…so this isn’t lame. It’s also not fake, CHAZ, you asshole.

  55. Hand:

    Thanks for the compliment.

  56. It’s real:,0,6934976.story

  57. Why does it say this guy was married to some chick named Catherine? THis girl that posted has a name of Jessica……..

  58. That is a link to some random retard who rode his bike in front of traffic.

  59. I think people sometimes find it helps the grieving process to write to their deceased loved one’s facebook, or send them emails or whatever – it’s like writing them a letter. You know they will never read it, but it helps to get it all out, and it keeps their memory alive a little longer.

    As for ‘shouldn’t she be sorting out his funeral instead of updating facebook’, people do strange, irrational things when they re in shock, grieving and heartbroken. Don’t judge them for it.

  60. If she felt better writing an update on his page, but Kaitlyn wasn’t trying to be stupid about it. Jessica could have called the girl or at least emailed her to give her the news instead of making her look like a jackass in front of everyone.

  61. but where’s the drama in that Kate?

    And I now have the weirdest urge to watch lost..

  62. Ouch.

    Though, “I still can’t get over the fact that you are gone” kind of says it all. I presumed he had died or had at least left her.

    Still, Kaitlyn may have skim read it – it was pretty lengthy – and not gotten the jist. Poor her for finding out that way (I’m presuming she knew him since she said “I love you guys”).

    That’s why I find posting stuff like that on a status (so early) inappropriate. Sometimes the news takes a while to filter through to people who should find out in a more private/personal manner. News of death is pretty extreme and finding out a public forum… not good (voice of experience speaking).

  63. I cried, I laughed, I cried again. Reasons:

    1st cry – What a beautiful text. Seriously, it’s amazingly beautiful.

    2nd cry – Chris died… poor girl, if I were there, I’d hold her in my arms, giving her comfort. Things like this is terrible, I hope the girl will be ok in time.

    only laugh – what a freakin dork that invite-me-to-the-wedding shithead was. “You WERE and are still my life and my everything!” Come on, someone had better learn to read the whole text before commenting next time…


  65. I know people do strange things when they’re grieving, but I still don’t agree with this sort of thing. I found out that a girl I went to school with had died by getting a Facebook event to her funeral – no joke (although I thought it was initially).

  66. So…, is there a wedding or not?

  67. Faaaaaaaaaaaake. Someone submit a REAL link to what happened to Chris.

  68. So is Jessica the mistress and Catherine’s the wife? None of this adds up.

  69. Maybe Chris WAS married to Catherine back when that guy worked with her, but he wasn’t at the time he died.

  70. jessica says “i can’t believe your gone”. Kaitlyn migh’ve inferred something was up…no? total moron. and if you’re fiance dies why are you posting about it on facebook the day after. have some common sense. i agree has to be a fake or these to people are the biggest morons…

  71. Poor girl… but why is she writing that to him on her facebook? I’m pretty sure he won’t have internet access where he is going!

  72. Google is Your Friend

  73. @A Friend
    You said you weren’t sure how Kaitlyn missed the story of his death because it was on various people’s pages. That’s a little wrong – finding out from facebook about the death of someone you know is more than a bit wrong.

  74. How is it more than a bit wrong? how is it wrong at all? You know someone, but not enough to see or speak to them everyday, so basically everyone except the people you live with and maybe a very small amount of others, you get home, sign on facebook and find something like that with people’s status updates who have found out that day, through other means or through facebook, what have you done wrong?

  75. @no way
    personal experience – a close friend died, and another close friend was about to call when I’d finished work to me to tell me properly, when I spotted someone’s status, them having been told shortly before. It’s a shit way to find out stuff like that. Maybe a week or so after once people find out, but not so soon.

  76. She killed the man, cause all women are whores.

  77. @ Penny Lane
    too soon snarf snarf

  78. you people really need to leave the house.i mean,i enjoy reading something that makes me laugh once and a while.But come on,all you people who comment daily on this stuff…trying to make up for something?…or no one writes to you on your own Facebooks =p

  79. That’s right SennMan. We are trying to make up for the fact that you’re a cunt.

  80. @SennMan
    Nah, work’s really quite quiet for me and facebook is blocked. Gotta have something to pass the time.

  81. haha,if a cunt makes me point out you in particular…hell.that i am!

  82. Why are people posting a link to some married guy who obviously had nothing to do with this attention whore Jessica.

    And if he did have a mistress and it happened to be this whore Jessica, then they both deserve each other in death.

  83. @CHAZ
    Good point, I hadn’t read the article, but yes – that guy was married to a girl called Catherine…

  84. Eitherway, I will be crashing this funeral ;)

  85. your all going to Hell as Virgins with idiotic thinking and retarded rationalization on someones misery or Facebook status(because we are spontaneous race of Human Beings full of faults).The next generation sold there souls for a XBOX360 or iPhone and probably call there own mothers CUNTS.

  86. TheGreatGreatGoblox


    So you are telling me that if your loved one dropped dead tomorrow, you’d take the time to update your Facebook status as part of your daily chores. You ever heard of disconnecting from the web for a while?

  87. Hey Fred Phelps….I mean SennMan, go preach your diarrhea somewhere else.

  88. Wow, I wouldn’t be able to hold it together enough at all to post anything. I seriously would not be able to sit at the computer, eat, sleep, breathe or anything the day after my fiance died (which is NOT gonna happen *cross fingers, touch something wooden, etc*)
    That is tragic. She muct be numb. (and I mean ‘numb’ in the dull ache, tears rolling down your face, not in hysterics yet, way.)

  89. I can’t believe this got put on lamebook… poor Chris

  90. This isn’t lame at all. Fail on Kaitlyn, maybe a *little*. But this is mostly just really sad. I feel so sorry for Jessica. This is horribly tragic, and I can only send as many good thoughts and prayers her way as possible. That has got to be incredibly hard to make it through. :’(

  91. Everyone gets so analytical about these people, decoding them as if we all knew them…perhaps some do. The only mistake is Kaitlyn typing in all caps but I guess she was just really excitied about the wedding….

  92. i brought some intelligent and self thinking individuals into my night is complete =) ty all!

  93. @Goblox – when my auntie died earlier this year her 3 children all updated their FB status with things like this. Their mum was found dead at 7am, FB was updated by 9am. It’s a depressing state of affairs

  94. #94

    I think it’s really easy to misunderstand or criticize these situations when you’re not the one in that position.

    My mom died in July after a very long battle with cancer. I took 5 minutes the morning after she died to post it on my Facebook and so did my brother. We did it because many of our friends live far away and had been following our mom’s struggle through FB. These were people who had supported us, consoled us and done everything they could long distance. Many were friends of mine from high school who had known my mother for years. We wanted them to know but simply did not have time to message or call everyone of those people. My brother and I both simply posted this, “For those who have been supporting us during our mother’s illness we wanted to let you know that she passed away at 6am this morning. We love you mom.” Many sent messages asking us to please list the time/location of the funeral or the name of the funeral home so they could send flowers.

    FB can be a communication tool and a way to keep in touch with people in a genuine manner.

  95. fake

    “chris died yesterday”

    preceded by, “chris i still cant believe you’re gone.”

    if dude died yesterday, i would imagine you would still be shocked

  96. I know someone whose partner was murdered, after he died she posted loads of messages to him on his page and in her own status. It was quite painful to watch.

    This is funny though cos I dont know any of them.

  97. Rachel – What you posted makes sense and why you posted it makes sense, in the case of my cousins it’s was badly spelled text talk when we hadn’t even informed the whole family – I’m also sorry for your loss

    Kristina – isn’t saying “I still can’t believe you’ve gone” an expression of shock?

    I can’t help but think that it would have been kinder if Jessica had deleted Kaitlyn’s comment and then sent her an email through FB

  98. Fake because none of the links we’ve seen about this dead Chris and his 2 year old son have even INVOLVED the name ‘Jessica’.

    It looks like Chris was still married to his wife Catherine when he died and thus I doubt he’s the Chris in this story.

  99. harsh shit on the real tho, i wanna go to the wedding tho so send an invit 5673 se roughland rd 97701

  100. Sheesh, Kaitlyn. Talk about a fail

  101. KB, I totally see your point. That’s why we waited until the day after. We wanted to make sure all of our family knew first since a lot of our cousins are friends on FB. Thanks for your condolences.

    And I would hate to be notified of something like that in “text speak”. I thought really hard about how to say it. My brother, who is in high school asked me to write it because he wanted to make sure it was appropriate.

  102. @Because

    So it’s fake because someone who, by the way, could’ve been ANYONE, has posted a link to some random guy’s death in the comments section of Lamebook? Your logic is ridiculously flawed.

  103. hahahahaha!

  104. It could have been that he had proposed to her once, and she had refused, but still consided him to be a great love of her life, or at least a dear friend. That is how I had read it at first. Then she finds out that he has died, and is regretful for the loss. Is this so hard to believe?

  105. Hey, and one want to crash the funeral with me?

  106. WTF? Kaitlyn reads, “I wish I could hear your voice again asking me to marry you”, and the only bells that go off in her head are wedding bells? I can’t understand misinterpretation on such a grand scale. Every sentence of this status screams “HE HAS DIED”.

    And poor, poor Jessica.

  107. Just want to point out that This Chris guy was married and cheating on his wife with this whore…….

  108. I am currently cheating on my boyfriend with a large pig called bessie!

  109. Ms.Terri. its called a priapism. lmao@ Goblox.

  110. Kaitlyn mega failed that conversation.

  111. Chaz = FTW

  112. if this happen to me i will hide for the rest of my life…

  113. Awwwww that’s so sad :-(

  114. Goblox, STFU!


  116. This is screwed up. Wouldn’t you think to tell your friends (and the person who posted the comment obviously knows them both fairly well), rather than updating your facebook status and letting people find out that way?

  117. Oh dear…poor Kaitlyn.

  118. Now they can return the wedding gift that they bought them. Sa-wheet!

  119. OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!!! Chris is dead?????

  120. I’m not dead, we are still getting married. This was Jessica and my way of not inviting Kaitlyn to our wedding

  121. …and on the 124th comment, he rose again.

  122. Does it make me a bad person that I laughed at that ^ ?
    Bad taste people, bad taste.

  123. The thing is, if my would-be fiance was killed YESTERDAY I wouldn’t be bothering to answer Facebook replies about it. Isn’t she in a state of grief (and probably shock)? I’m sorry, but hanging out on Facebook, and having the possibility of awkward exchanges like this, is just really strange to me.

  124. Each to their own I suppose @Adelaide.

  125. @Pink Actually my first thought was that it sounded like something one of my friends would’ve posted. Her husband came home from Iraq for a week or two, they got married, then he went back. It sounds like she’s talking about a deployed soldier, not a dead guy.

  126. I tell you what, reading through some of these comments – some of you people are proper heartless.

    But jesus, this is really sad.
    How that Kaitlyn could have misinterpreted that, I have no idea ¬_¬’

  127. when my friends dad died she posted it on facebook from her phone…. she spent all her time with her family though. there was nothing wrong with it. she said it was easier then telling people about it or having other people “hear things”.

  128. You know, when my fiance and I ended things, one of the first things I thought of was ice cream too. Poor Jessica.

  129. I completely understand why she wrote it on facebook. When a friend of mine passed, his facebook was flooded with people saying how much they missed him, and every now and then people still leave messages for him saying they miss him or how something reminded them of him. Regardless of whether the deceased is going to see it or not, it’s a way of reaching out and connecting with them again. Poor girl.

  130. kaitlyn is stupid. even though English is not my mother language, i got the idea that something was wrong. . .
    oh well… ppl makes mistakes. whatever

  131. i understand far to well my wife died and one of the first things i did when i got to a computer and was not near the hospital was log into facebook to let people know she died. it wasnt a sympathy thing or anything.

  132. Riveting tale, chap! Just kidding, she should kill herself

  133. Oh dear….

  134. I don’t know how many of you have actually experienced the death of a loved one, but once that person is gone, there’s really not much to *do*. My mom passed away about 10 years ago, and after the initial hustle and bustle of activity, it’s a lot of sitting around and waiting. We made phone calls to friends and family, and I notified a few people by e-mail and other means of electronic communication. Then we sat around and cried a lot and tried to make sense of what had happened.

    I highly doubt Jessica was neglecting anyone or anything by taking the time to make a status update. That takes less than 5 minutes. I’m sure the people around her were able to cope.

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