Monday, January 31, 2011

Meet Kia

previous post: Out of Touch

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86 Comments

  1. Jesus,thats awful.

    Sure look boil the kettle and we have a cuppa.

  2. No no, I get it. Seriously, I do. Both of you. (By the way, it was Pep who asked if it was your first language.) If we’re to believe the facebook hype, French is your first language Pep (I don’t believe it, but let’s just run with that for the sake of entertainment), but I was throwing your suppositions back in your face by mentioning the language; in fact English IS my mothertongue, although I was indeed born in Brazil. All kindsa meta-sarcasm going on here. Shit I bet you feel like The Riddler when he first meets Bruce Wayne right now, not that I don’t have better graphic novel analogies to make, but I use this one because it’s one you’ll get (and when I say “get” I mean easily from Google).

    Conor there are roughly six things available to me withint 100m2 that I’d rather have dissolving in my rectum right now than salt, although Vince is a bit further away probably. Salt is good the next day though.

  3. I now picture you as a cloaked man-hag, wandering about an Irish forest in search of firewood for your makeshift yurt.

    How did you get internet? Did an iphone fall out of a Ryanair plane while you were bundling twigs to repair your thatched roof?

  4. No, there isn’t meta-anything going on here, you’re just jumping back and forth. And no, I didn’t use the word irony incorrectly. You ever actually look in a dictionary? There are multiple uses of words, for multiple contexts, so the connotation you’ve developed for ‘irony’ in relation to strict literary use means nada.

    And you were looking so fine, sandcat, so fine…

  5. I just presumed ye had molded into one sarcastic cunty person. Apologies.

    No no no the IMF bailout bought us all new laptops so that was nice of ye, thanks guys.

    I find salt is good to run into the open sores after

  6. rub

  7. Shit Pep you hit so close to home I thought you might be someone I knew till I realised you were referring to Conor.

    Here’s a page that will help you understand the differences between rhetorical and cosmic irony, neither of which you in fact used. http://www.guardian.co.uk/theguardian/2003/jun/28/weekend7.weekend2

  8. Yup thats me, a big hairy ginger freckly pale faced drunk Irish cunt.

    Irony is as hard as random to describe or use correctly. especially if your quoting from a shitty english tabloid.

    Its no ‘sun’ thats for sure

  9. http://www.oed.com/search?searchType=dictionary&q=irony&_searchBtn=Search

    Oh whoops, that’s the OED. In case you’re too retarded to figure it out, here ye’ go:

    ‘A figure of speech in which the intended meaning is the opposite of that expressed by the words used; usually taking the form of sarcasm or ridicule in which laudatory expressions are used to imply condemnation or contempt.’

    Yes, that’s right. It says what the word IRONY means, not what your cool friends on the internet bitch and moan about because they don’t like that one song by Alanis Morissette.

  10. I accused you of speaking ironically, because I couldn’t believe you would actually mean what you said in the first two messages you wrote in this thread. You know, I said I hoped you were saying the opposite of what you meant, via IRONY. Remember, my drunk friend?

  11. 1) Look up tabloid.
    2) Stop being so pedantic about the irony issue, it’s starting to get ironic. (Nah for serious you’re right though Pep, unfortunately.)
    3) Stop mocking my Irish heritage.

    Ah shit kids I really do love y’all but bed is calling. It’s been fun though, we should do it again soon. 🙂 x

  12. Last paragraph aimed at me???. i have no friends, i sit here refreshing the page 24 hours a day

  13. Night night, sandcat.

    Sorry Conor, I guess it’s time to go talk to the trees for a while. You’re much more decent than I thought. Eat some treebark for the two of us.

  14. I laughed so hard at that comment, Connor that I woke up my housemate and almost choked to death on my beer.

    No Pep, I don’t remember. You’re talking to two drunkards, remember? Just be glad most of the letters are landing in the right place…

  15. Your drinking on your own? you are most definatly Irish so.

    Ya i gotta go and try catch some rabbits and get potatos for soup in the morning, also gotta dig my pit to cook it all in.

  16. Bed didn’t quite work out, but that’s the exact thought I had about you (it took me until now to realise that you, too, are Irish). Let’s hear it for free laptops, and bail-outs by the IMF and the English! Also alternating typing with drinking and hitting refresh.

    I gotta go set up my poitin distillery.

  17. I really do think if she turned the lights off, her tongue and fingernails would glow

  18. All you had to do was click on my link and put 2 and 2 together.

    Drink with the left, refresh with the right. Thats the new slogan of my political party. aint got too many people on board yet

  19. Natdigga.
    Comment section is reserved for angry comments and a place where people can come to hate the English for 800 years of oppression rape, pillage and tyranny. They also stole our spuds in the famine

  20. Hella/the more obnoxious hecka for those who don’t curse is a NorCal thing. It’s used in SoCal…but mostly NorCal. And there’s your California language lesson for the evening.

  21. hee hee, Pep said pluperfect, hee hee,

  22. I’d do’er.

  23. Hmm. I had never heard of the “pluperfect” before reading these comments, but I bet only a retart would want to use it anyway.

  24. I ran out of sleepy time tea, so I figured I would stalk Lamebook and read the comments. But, jeebus, these were atrocious. Bleh.

    I just don’t understand why this girl felt the need to show me her tracheal area while also listing a bunch of useless information that is definitely not going to win me a round on Jeopardy.

    Maybe if she starting using her mighty tongue and so thoroughly cleared throat to put penises in, we wouldn’t have to suffer her spawn’s wrath 15 or so years from now . . . Oh, the irony. (I use that word how I want, bitches.)

    G’night lamebook.

  25. I really think this “6O day chaLLenge !!” that lends the album its name is an impersonation of sorts, and Kia is actually rather smart and acting fully out of sarcastic (or, as rightly put above, ironic) intentions. But that’s me.

  26. She’s easy to please but will follow your every step to make sure everything is in place. Something is very wrong there. Conor, reading your comments gave me a massive head fuck. However, I like it.

  27. Oh Gawd..Tthings like this are bringing babies into the world…. how tragic…

  28. I must be really bored because I followed the comments like a soap opera. I was never good at following those

    So… Conor is an Irish leperchaun/wild man, Pep is possibly not French and sandcat is a Brazillian shemale of Irish ancestry. All three are drunk. Something about Irony. The rest is superfluous

    I like Amanda Sue

  29. @MsBuzz…Took me a bit to figure out what historyprof was talking about. It appears that what is written is 42O (with the letter “O”) not 420 (with the number zero) – it’s subtle though and is one of those WTF moments as in “How the fuck did you notice that is was the letter and not the number? And why would you think she meant anything other that 4/20? WTF”

    As for “based”…I have heard of the Based Gods, so it’s probably that. But Urban Dictionary lists several definitions – two of which stand out:

    1. Stoned
    2. Gay and proud of it.

  30. @wandr,

    Though I know not for certain, I shall graciously and modestly assume that sandcat alleges my not really being French on account of my voluminous and capacious lexicon in English. Being Irish, he has probably not studied any real foreign languages, just that loogie-ridden Gaelic stuff, and is therefore unaware of the fact that all native romance speakers, especially francophones, find it easier to reach for the polysyllabic and latinesque terminology in English over the more common and simple anglo-saxon words. If one need ask why that is, I shall merely curse that person’s darkness and laugh in his/her face.

    Oh, and I think we’re just supposed to presume that sandcat’s mommy and daddy are rich landowners and he’s had a jet-setting life, not that he has actual roots tying him to Brazilian culture.

  31. Yeah im a wild man who lives in the woods around shannon airport, but im not your typical small leprechaun ye Americans think we are. Leprechauns can also be vertically challenged.

    I can speak Gaelic although not very well.

    I think sandcat just has a brazilian and is proud of it.

  32. @ Pep – I feel you (the part about the “reach for the polysyllabic and latinesque terminology in English over the more common and simple anglo-saxon words”, although you make it sound so pedantic when it’s just natural.

    @ Conor – them Americans. Gaelic is sexy. Keep it up

    Also, I like brazilian (the underwear, not the tongue)

  33. @ wandr – 🙂 Once in a blue moon, I like to write messages on lamebook that are ever so slightly arrogant and pompous. It gets the flames going, as long paragraphs do.

  34. @ccrashh You realise that the only place that writes dates month/day/year is the US…so if historyprof is from anywhere outside America the 4/20 wouldn’t even be a date – thus he would wouldn’t automatically translate that to 20th April.

  35. @pendragon – the US is not the ONLY place that writes the day as month/day/year. Nice try though.

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