Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Keep it on the Couch

Keep it on the Couch

previous post: Private InvestigatWHORE



  1. …in fact, you’re staring at me right now, wondering why the fuck I’m posting this crap on facebook rather than just saying it to your face.

  2. “And most of all, the way you stare at me”

    Desperation much?

  3. This is the kind of message that annoys me. If you’re having fun snuggling on the couch, why would you pause to get on your phone and write about it on Facebook?

  4. “I just thought I’d leave you a message”

    Really? When you’re sitting right next to him and can easily speak to him?

  5. this is actually kind of adorable

  6. She is an exhibitionist and he’s a puppy-dog stalker.

    They both make me want to vomit.

  7. Eh. Kinda cute and definitely not lamebook material. :/

  8. 7. WTF? Cute? NOT lame?
    “Instead of saying all this romantic stuff, I decided I would be a creepy nonromantic lunatic and look stupid to everyone. I’m not going to talk, or say anything about this moment. I’m going to ruin it by making it appear like I’m texting my friends and ignoring you why you sulk in desperation because I, am a loser.

  9. Oh jesus, Lamebook, get with the delete function.

  10. @ dr. m and Erik K Veland
    you guys are mentally ill.
    that is all.

  11. barf.

    if im a girl and shit like this makes me cringe, i cant imagine how it makes a guy feel.
    she needs to calm down, i could just imagine what kind of girlfriend she is.

  12. If this was my girlfriend I would plead with her to stop. That is so embarassing. Actually she would never be my girlfriend because I would never date a girl like that.

  13. Staring is creepy, period.

  14. The whole status is creepy.

  15. Guys, I’m super upset that stuff like this gets posted and some of the LAME GOLD, like legitimate AWESOMELY LAME stuff I submit *never* is put up. This really isn’t that bad.

  16. Lame! But not the post, I see hundreds like that all the time. Lamebook is being lame for posting something so cretinous – to be fair, it does scale quite high on SICK but still, she’s probably very young and very infatuated.

  17. “Hey everyone, look how happy I’m pretending to be! I’m so happy I have to update my facebook status just so everyone knows how happy I am!”

  18. Everyone here defending this post probably deserves to have many of their own posts on lamebook. This is equally as lame as anything else on here, especially given the fact that some of you think its acceptable and its as common as it is.

  19. She probably doesnt even have a boyfriend, its just a stuffed teddy staring at her….

  20. Her picture is searing into my soul.

  21. i puked in my mouth a little

  22. Hypoallergenic beaver

    Damn. If I was still “snuggling” at 3:40am with a girl like that I’d kill myself.

  23. “OMG, I hate my laugh. I can’t believe you make me laugh because I hate my laugh. I love that I’m staring at you while you’re staring at me. Is there something in my teeth? Oh no, don’t make me laugh, I hate my laugh. Oh, but your 2 1/2 Men impersonations are so funny but damn I hate my laugh. I’m such a grown up. And I hate my laugh.”

  24. She is mute and yet somehow manages to produce grunts whilst laughing.
    If she could’nt write this stuff on Facebook, how would he be able to make out what she’s saying?

  25. There are still douchebags out there who wear cologne?

  26. this is not lame at all. it’s cute. if my girlfriend posted this i’d think it was adorable. i post stuff to people who are in the room all the time because i think it’s funny. if that makes me lame then i’m perfectly okay with being lame

  27. you people need to get a heart and quit making innocent things out to be creepy or stupid. this is neither. there are legitimately funny posts in this blog. this is not one of them.

  28. Dr. M: Congrats, most people think you are nauseating and have no sense of public decorum. This IS a sweet message. Posting it on facebook, for everyone to be thrilled by, makes it instantly stupid.

  29. No one mentioned “anywhom” !?!? Slackers.

  30. fuck this bitch.

  31. canaduck: believe it or not, your sense of public decorum would probably change quite a bit going from a semi-private post made where only your friends and relatives can read it to a blog where the whole point is for strangers to ridicule you and point out every spelling mistake so people can call you a whore and tell you to kill yourself. posts are made like this every damn day, if you don’t like mushy love notes don’t read them. again, there are posts that deserve to be on this blog. this is not one of them

  32. What is with people writing crap to people when they’re right there?! I know some girl who wrote an ode to her boyfriend, which mentioned how he was in bed next to her. Now if he was half the man she said he was, how is it they’re in bed together and she has the time/strenght to be on FACEBOOK??!

  33. if you don’t have a message like this on your facebook friends feed you’re so rich and elitist your opinion about what constitutes a lame facebook post is incredibly irrelevant.

  34. When this relationship crashes and burns – and it will, probably pretty soon – it is our duty to spam her inbox with this screencap.

    It’s the only way she’ll learn.

  35. Anywhom? Wtf?

    God I hate bitches who post this pathetic sappy shit. Yeah you love the way your bf smells, we don’t care!

  36. Donald Trump's Comb-Over

    Mr. M is probably a) Christine’s boyfriend or b) Christine herself. Or maybe Mr. M is just that fucking retarded.

  37. OMFG I can’t belive these ppl defending these kind of stuff! Rly :S it is NOT cool to post something like that on Facebook, let alone if the dude is right next to her. LOL talk about lame!!

  38. meh… I’ve seen worse (the spelling and the corniness). It was on his wall, anyway. It’s not like this was her status message, or anything.

  39. This might be acceptable right after some pretty amazing couch sex.

  40. I’m not Christine, Christine’s bf, or Mr. M., and I agree with Mr. M. I don’t think it’s a question of “Lame” or “Not Lame” but rather “Lame Enough” or “Not Lame Enough”. While this *is* /slightly/ lame, I vote “Not Lame Enough”. If it were a status update and not a wall post, my vote might be different.

    I mean, I see this kind of thing all the time on Fbook. Sure, it’s an example of a lame trend, but not an extraordinary example. So, like I said, Not Lame Enough.

  41. Then you are lame for not posting them on LB!

  42. i agree with mr m. no harm done, its a bit lame but also a bit sweet. people write this stuff all the time, it no longer offends me. actually rachel said it even better.
    however i like to think christine’s boyfriend submitted it.

  43. why did this girl waste her time posting this while she is laying RIGHT. NEXT. TO. HIM. I take it she is the clingy type…

  44. It used to be you could burn all those embarrassing love letters from your youth so when you died there would just be ashes. Now…they’ll be floating around the internet… F.O.R.E.V.E.R.

  45. cue the music….

  46. Well, I guess the fact that she doesn’t like to laugh because she ‘hates her own laugh’ says it all really. I kind of feel sorry for her…
    But no, this is not facebook material. 99% of all thoughts are not facebook material.

  47. Regardless of whether or not you think the sentiment is sweet, it is 100% lame to text/e-mail/FB message a person who is sitting RIGHT NEXT TO YOU.

    Lordy, if your relationship is really so great and all, would it kill you to freaking unplug from texting and Facebook and Twitter and all that crap every once in a while? “I think you’re swell and all, but not interesting enough to convince me to put my damn phone down and actually pay attention to you.” Ugh. People like this make me want to slap them back to the Dark Ages.

  48. It’s not a status, it’s a wall post…
    So she basically went over to his wall to write this disgusting ode.
    Which then means that it wasn’t for his benefit but for the benefit of all his friends.
    Bit of a show off really. EW.

  49. Exactly. The fact that this is a mushy wall post between lovers takes away almost all of the lameness here.

    Christ people, did you ever see MySpace? There was no need for a LameSpace, because the whole bloody website was full of lame. Take this message, mushily it fourteen times and add a sickly glitter graphic.

    This is a fresh breath of non-lame in comparison!

  50. “…and most of all i love staring at you through the window while you’re in the shower”

  51. why would you be on facebook when your sitting right next to your dude? really though?
    you put out all this energy to type something that you could of just said out loud?
    ..this is creepy and sounds like if he ever “let go” you would be a mess.
    and you guys have probably only been together for like, 2 months – if that.
    get over yourself.

  52. Nothing wrong with this, cute.

  53. I don’t think this is lame. Look at it from a different perspective. Sometimes people want others (friends) to know how they feel about that someone ‘special’ in their lives. She probably tells him all the time how she feels however it’s different when you read it. FB is there to state how we feel or what we are up to at any given moment…she felt like sharing at that given moment.

  54. @Mandy

    You are all of what is wrong with the female gender. If you want to tell your friends how special this person is, do. DON’T broadcast it via facebook. It is just embarrassing for all parties involved. If it’s a more personal message (which believe me I have seen MANY times before) either private message it or text it. DON’T leave it there for the whole world to see, NOONE else cares…

  55. is there a lamebook lamebook?

  56. The Scarlet Pimple


  57. anmywhome? wtf you just broke the douchebag meter

  58. never let go, jack.. never let go.

  59. Sad thing is I know this chick and she was posting this about her Dog.

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