I have a feeling she was already “in a relationship,” but she’d not changed her status. Then, when the guy dumped her, she wanted the drama of changing to “single,” but she couldn’t do that until she made herself “in a relationship.”
Wait until she does a bunch of shots tonight, booty calls Andy, blows him (captured on his cameraphone), and then he tells her that she is way more fat than he is short and still doesn’t want to date her again.
Nobody is commenting on how she called him a “TOOL BAG” then decided he “BELONGS IN HELL” and, after one minute, decided that he was more of a “TOOL BAG” than that he “BELONGS IN HELL” and switched back?
Also, her relationship was 4 minute on facebook, but she said she broke up with the guy after 2 minutes of being in the relationship.
Let us study for a moment here the complex social emotions that are running through Michelle’s head. She displays classic signs of what I like to term “The Attention Defecit”, a complex in which one airs their frustrations in a public arena to compensate for their lack of a support network. Incredulous by the lack of replies, the subject has taken this as negative reinforcement, continually posting updates to allow as many people as possible to gain experience to this ‘news’, maximizing the public spotlight on the subject. A truely facinating insight into the human mind. If you want to read more, buy my upcoming book: Social Networking and The Mind.
Let us study for a moment here the complex social emotions that are running through Michelle’s head. She displays classic signs of what I like to term “The Cock Defecit”, a complex in which one airs their frustrations in a public arena to compensate for their lack of vaginal penetration. Incredulous by the lack of intercourse, the subject has taken this as negative reinforcement, continually exposing herself to strangers to allow as many people as possible to gain exposure to her ‘goodies’, maximizing the public spotlight on her orifice. A truely fascinating view into the human body. If you want to read more, buy my upcoming book: Vagina Power.
Yeah, “Andy = belongs in hell” doesn’t really make sense… He is belongs in hell?
Ratcoon, she was just trying to make sure she got it right. It’s very important. Some people can’t afford to leave here, but she insists they still need to get out. My brain hurts.
Hi! I’m Chairman Mao! I already told you that I am a sweaty, obese 30-year-old virgin, that I live in my mother’s basement, that I smell bad, I’m balding, and I’m missing a front tooth, and that I dropped out of high school after 10th grade. I am still smart, though (MY MOM TELLS ME SO!) because I read graphic novels and internet zines. What I DIDN’T tell you is that I have seven dildos so I can use a different one every day of the week. I LOVE to build things out of Legos.
I also have a deformed second head growing from my neck.
As my lengthy posts are considered unreadable to many I will attempt to keep this brief.
Ratcoon: You have provided an intriguing insight as it pertains to the change of updates. To go from wishing somebody the greatest punishment in religion back to a container which holds a mechanic’s items should raise an eyebrow. It is possible that she felt she lacked the authority (as God would only have this power) to condemn somebody to the fiery pits of Satan. Or she felt these words were too harsh.
Sigmund: You make a great point in regards to ADD and how Personal Marketing on the Internet has become a newly found skill that has taken up much of our mental thoughts. People start to realize that things such as status updates are transient and that to capture the maximum attention of your audience requires very clever placement of your personal announcements. You must consider time of day, traffic, amongst other statistical factors. I would be pleased to continue hearing your analysis of this modern technological phenomenon.
if she was listed on Facebook as “in a relationship with Andy **”, and Andy removed his relationship status first, then a message would come up on her profile saying that she was ‘in a relationship’ but not who with. So that’s probably what happened- they split up, and both decided to announce it on Facebook within 2 minutes of each other.
She’s still a TOOL BAG though.
this is also what happens when you don’t have a group of friends who will take you out immediately after such a breakup to get you drunk, so that you can bitch sloppily over a wet table surrounded by support. (“Yah Michelle, he’s like a TOTAL tool bag.”)
Instead you have swelling rage, a slammed bedroom door, and an iphone with a facebook application.
OMG YOU GUYS I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU DIDN’T COMMENT ON MY FAKE CHAIRMAN MAO POST THAT WAS JUST AN EDITED COPY OF WHAT SIGMUND SAID. BUT REALLY IT’S FUNNY I PROMISE. AND THEN SOME OTHER TROLL PRETENDED TO BE CHAIRMAN MAO TOO?!?!?!? AND NOBODY CARES?!?! I LOVE YOU CHAIRMAN MAO PLEASE DON’T IGNORE MY SHENANIGANS.
I want to know why nobody is pointing out that the entire thing is fake. That’s not what updates look like. Why isn’t her name in blue? And her last name? Or did someone just recreate the entire thing?
Ok. If this Andy person belongs in Hell and is such “tool bag”, whatever that happens to be, then why the hell did HE dump HER? If he is so terrible and she is oh so relieved to be rid of him why didn’t she break up with him? Screaming “Thank God he dumped me” via FB really just proves you are a lame twat waffle.
Michelle, you’re second status post couldn’t be more true. There are a lot of pathetic people in the world and you, my dear, are one of them.